greta96 Posted August 24, 2017 Share Posted August 24, 2017 Not because I wanted to, losing him was the last thing I would have ever wanted. I've loved this man for so many years, and I can't believe we are in fact not meant to be. It doesn't make sense, because I have never felt this way with and about anyone in my whole life. But his lies ruined everything. And with the lies came the bully attitude every time I tried asking him the truth. He always, always turned it around and made me look like the drama queen, like the trouble maker, and made it look like it was my fault for doubting him. According to him, I shouldn't even have thought of questioning him, the mere fact that I didn't just blindly trust him was a sign of trouble. But his lies were blatant... at least some of them. I tried hard to dumb myself down and pretend to believe them, I tried to find excuses where there were none that made sense, but I guess at times it would all pile up and I would dare ask for clarification on an action of his...and instead of him calmly talking it out with me, he accused me of starting drama, told me how he was not going to put up with it and by the end of it I was the one apologizing for doubting him. I never found out if there was another woman, although chances are there was. He called me every night with the exception of one night per week, and then his excuses were weak, didn't hold any water (and no I didn't ask for excuses, he was volunteering them). Every other weekend he told me he had the kids (17 year old) in spite of the fact that at the beginning of our relationship he had told me that due to their ages, the kids preferred to do things with their friends and only saw him maybe once a month for a few hours. Yet during our relationship, they came religiously every other week and sometimes stayed the whole weekend. And when this happened, he never called or texted me. So I still think he was in a parallel relationship with the woman he was with when we got together. So anyway, yesterday was the last drop. I am due to leave on vacation on Sunday, and even though we had had plans to see each other Saturday he had cancelled those saying he had a BBQ to go to. Fine, so we arranged for Friday instead. Well yesterday he messaged me that he wasn't going to make it Friday either, and he said so in a very cold manner. It became clear that this man had no feelings for me, and that he had plans with someone else. I was already replaced. So I ended it. I told him about all the lies I had put up with over the course of the relationship, all my suspicions, I told him everything I had built up inside me. I told him that my insecurities stemmed from his lies, and that if he wanted to see how I am in a healthy relationship he should have given me a healthy relationship. He was fuming of course, but didn't try to keep me, didn't ask me to talk, just announced that he was going to block my email and delete my number. Some of his lies were: having the kids when it was obvious he didn't, telling me he came back from his vacation on a day different than the one he actually did (this I could easily verify with the airline), telling me on 2 different occasions that he had fallen asleep from 6 pm to 3 am (this is a man who doesn't sleep more than 5 hours a night, and at the time those naps happened he was out of work so he was doing nothing all day), and others just as hard to believe. It's over for good, and I feel dead inside. Oddly enough I still think he was my other half, because except for the lies and shady behavior on his part here and there, he was great with me and we had an amazing time. I love him with all my heart and I know I will never get over him. But unfortunately he never felt the same way, and life with someone who always lies and refuses to hear you out and reassure you is hell. Link to comment
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