30 days of No Contact log ( Think I can do it?)

[Annia]

I dreamed about him again. But I can't quite recall what it was. I woke up a bit distressed but that's all.

[Shunsparkle]

Hi guys, sorry I've been absent lately but things have been hectic. Things have been down for me lately. And yes, I broke ND cause I felt so low. I had a great nans funeral, I wasnt very close but seeing how everyone was hurting. How my granch was hurting, hurt me. It also reminded me of the pain I had felt watching my ex suffer after the death of his granch. So I did, in a moment of weakness message him saying that I felt low and could do with a friend. He ignored me.

I then seen on fb through a mutual friend that him and his guy friend's have found a bunch of new girls to bother with. That cut me deep and I started crying to all my friends and family after around 6 weeks of being over with him.

Is this classed as the relapse stage cause honestly I've been doing so good 😂

Feel a lot better and even stupid today haha

[hrb23]

Hey guys. Weeks have been going great. Love my work and the people around me. A little worried about the weekends though as they always seem to set me back. Hoping to see an improvement this weekend.

 

I have such a weird complex right now whereby I hate GOOD weather. For instance this weekend in my city is gonna be 90's and I hate it because all I can think of is "I wonder what my ex and her new bf are doing with this beautiful weather. I wish I could spend the nice days with her instead."

[Annia]

I'm tired of being sad, guys. Especially for someone who "didn't choose" me.

[Annia]

15 days of pure NC. It's been hard not to snoop but I know I have to keep on going.

[hrb23]

15 days of pure NC. It's been hard not to snoop but I know I have to keep on going.

 

9 days here. Pure NC.

 

I found deleting all my social media apps and deactivating my accounts helped with the snooping but that is extreme.

 

I'm really sad today. Keep thinking to myself "I miss my 'insert name here'" but I need to keep reminding myself that that person doesn't exist anymore.

[Whocares479]

Hi guys, sorry I've been absent lately but things have been hectic. Things have been down for me lately. And yes, I broke ND cause I felt so low. I had a great nans funeral, I wasnt very close but seeing how everyone was hurting. How my granch was hurting, hurt me. It also reminded me of the pain I had felt watching my ex suffer after the death of his granch. So I did, in a moment of weakness message him saying that I felt low and could do with a friend. He ignored me.

I then seen on fb through a mutual friend that him and his guy friend's have found a bunch of new girls to bother with. That cut me deep and I started crying to all my friends and family after around 6 weeks of being over with him.

Is this classed as the relapse stage cause honestly I've been doing so good 😂

Feel a lot better and even stupid today haha

 

It's okay, I'm pretty sure 90 percent of us have went through this. Whenever we fall, we just get back up!

[Whocares479]

15 days of pure NC. It's been hard not to snoop but I know I have to keep on going.

 

You got this!!

[Whocares479]

9 days here. Pure NC.

 

I found deleting all my social media apps and deactivating my accounts helped with the snooping but that is extreme.

 

I'm really sad today. Keep thinking to myself "I miss my 'insert name here'" but I need to keep reminding myself that that person doesn't exist anymore.

 

That is not extreme. Whatever helps with your mental health is absolutely necessary. Social media will always be there when you come back. Congratulations on your days of pure NC!

[Whocares479]

For my fellow NC peeps, I have a question. What moment made you finally realize "Okay it's really over, I need to move on with my life" ?

 

Mines was after we became intimate, he told me he regret it. That is when I realized it is officially over. That was the ultimate betrayal.

[Shunsparkle]

For my fellow NC peeps, I have a question. What moment made you finally realize "Okay it's really over, I need to move on with my life" ?

 

Mines was after we became intimate, he told me he regret it. That is when I realized it is officially over. That was the ultimate betrayal.

 

I think for me is when he didn't message me back after I told him how low I was, how hurt I was etc and he didn't reply. I don't even think of him as a human anymore just a horrible person and I'm ashamed I wasted so much of my time caring for him.

I honestly feel so much better. He pops into my head now and again but then I think about that experience and kick him right out again haha.

There are plenty of nice men out there who deserve me and he isn't one of them

[Annia]

For my fellow NC peeps, I have a question. What moment made you finally realize "Okay it's really over, I need to move on with my life" ?

 

Mines was after we became intimate, he told me he regret it. That is when I realized it is officially over. That was the ultimate betrayal.

 

When I realised that it was really over was after the denial stage after he told me that he had met someone else with whom he wanted to pursue a relationship with and that for that reason we had to break up. When I realised it was for real a bit after feeling in denial, I realised that it was over and that I'd never be with him again.

 

When I realised I really needed to move on and stopped having any hope was after a awful week or two after the break up of me crying almost every day, snooping his social media and seeing pictures of him with her in a trip and then our last conversation when I saw that he was just acting nice but really wanting me to get away and move on with my life. I realised that it was over... that this girl was probably the love of his life (very soon, but I don't know, some timelines are just like that) and that he wanted nothing to do with me except the typical courtesy of "I really want us to be friends someday, you're amazing, bla bla bla". It was then when I realised that I really needed pure NC.

 

 

So now it's been 17 days of pure NC and I must confess that the urges of snooping are decreasing a bit even though I still think about him a lot every day. I'm on my road to healing.

[JA0371]

Found this thread, so I decided to jump on.

 

Day 2 of NC starting today. I ended a 13 month long distance relationship yesterday... And even though I feel resolved, my heart hurts. Im not really good at ending relationships. I always give my all, especially when I want it to work.

 

Hope everyone is doing good. Maybe this will give me some accountability.

[hrb23]

For my fellow NC peeps, I have a question. What moment made you finally realize "Okay it's really over, I need to move on with my life" ?

 

Mines was after we became intimate, he told me he regret it. That is when I realized it is officially over. That was the ultimate betrayal.

 

I could say it was when she cheated on me. Or when she told me she was choosing him over me. Or when she slept with me only to block me hours later for two weeks.

 

Honestly though it was probably when she lied to her parents to make them hate me. I loved her parents but when she painted me as the bad guy it was over and I knew it.

 

Also my mom told me I had to choose between them because she couldn't be in my life if she was just going to keep seeing this girl wreck it.

 

Anyways, its over and I need to move on.

 

In other news. A girl I've had a crush on for weeks bumped into me yesterday. When we first started talking around April she loosely mentioned a guy in her life (sounded like an SO) to which I was a little bummed. Anyway she stopped getting jobs at the building im in so I didn't see her for a while. Then yesterday I randomly bumped into her and her friend on my way to get lunch. We spoke for a little and then she said she was upset I couldn't make her party tomorrow night. I told her I was sorry but it was nice to see her. She then said we should get lunch sometime and asked me to text her!!

 

Is this a normal thing for a mere acquaintance to ask when she has a boyfriend?? Of course I'd love to get lunch with her I think she's awesome but the whole situation threw me a little!

[EternalOptimis]

Found this thread, so I decided to jump on.

 

Day 2 of NC starting today. I ended a 13 month long distance relationship yesterday... And even though I feel resolved, my heart hurts. Im not really good at ending relationships. I always give my all, especially when I want it to work.

 

Hope everyone is doing good. Maybe this will give me some accountability.

 

Well I don't know if it being long-distance is a factor, but hopefully the day-to-day is a little easier

Often it's the missing dates, face-to-face interactions & companionship I miss the most

[Annia]

I'm trying to visualize frequently how I want to be physically, mentally and emotionally... me healed and happy. Now it's time to actually do things that make me move in that direction.

 

I had a back problem that made me leave the gym for almost 2 months, but now I can exercise but with moderation. I got a good deal and I'm training with a PT that directs my training taking this back problem in consideration. So I got back today and it felt so good. I've been so sedentary lately. This is a step in the right direction, physically and mentally.

 

I think that we need to focus on what we can do to improve the areas of our life that we feel are lacking, so that everything comes together, and at least it's time when our mind is focused on something productive and something other than our "heartbreak pain".

[Whocares479]

Found this thread, so I decided to jump on.

 

Day 2 of NC starting today. I ended a 13 month long distance relationship yesterday... And even though I feel resolved, my heart hurts. Im not really good at ending relationships. I always give my all, especially when I want it to work.

 

Hope everyone is doing good. Maybe this will give me some accountability.

 

I hope everything goes well for you. Ending a relationship can be difficult, but atleast you had the guts to do what was right.

[Whocares479]

I'm trying to visualize frequently how I want to be physically, mentally and emotionally... me healed and happy. Now it's time to actually do things that make me move in that direction.

 

I had a back problem that made me leave the gym for almost 2 months, but now I can exercise but with moderation. I got a good deal and I'm training with a PT that directs my training taking this back problem in consideration. So I got back today and it felt so good. I've been so sedentary lately. This is a step in the right direction, physically and mentally.

 

I think that we need to focus on what we can do to improve the areas of our life that we feel are lacking, so that everything comes together, and at least it's time when our mind is focused on something productive and something other than our "heartbreak pain".

Working out has definitely been my snitches to my broken heart. Rebuilding myself up is the only way I could get myself off the ground. It will work for you too

[Whocares479]

The revelation of it being finally over refreshes me, do yall feel the same? Like not necessarily being over the person but knowing that it is over. No more endless cycle, or desperately trying to get them back. It may not be our fairytale ending, but atleast it's a start to our refreshing beginning.

[EternalOptimis]

The revelation of it being finally over refreshes me, do yall feel the same? Like not necessarily being over the person but knowing that it is over. No more endless cycle, or desperately trying to get them back. It may not be our fairytale ending, but atleast it's a start to our refreshing beginning.

 

Lately (2 days), I've had horrible feelings I can only trace to my wanting her back in my life. Logically, I don't. We weren't compatible on several levels, and she'll only hurt me again (I don't trust her after infidelity) but that I am still flitting back into bargaining / rationalizing is disturbing.

 

I guess it's a process. And it comes in waves of occasional regression..

[Annia]

The revelation of it being finally over refreshes me, do yall feel the same? Like not necessarily being over the person but knowing that it is over. No more endless cycle, or desperately trying to get them back. It may not be our fairytale ending, but atleast it's a start to our refreshing beginning.

 

That revelation and acceptance is freeing and a relief but at the same time I'm feeling sad with the total and definite realisation that it's irreversibly over.

 

19 days here. No snooping, no nothing... zero contact. There happened more things but I'll write later when I have more time.

 

I wish that everyone is doing well and "NCing" all the way.

[1a1a]

A two fer

 

Ex is working the other room at my venue tonight. And it's looking like two rooms is being condensed to one, vague scab bumping of seeing him And he'll be the one to stay and work and I am down a shift (lost a shift last night too at a different venue so I am already feeling sore about that). Bleh. What a dud weekend

[Annia]

I dreamed about him again lol

[Shunsparkle]

My ex tried to sleep with my best friend. Obviously my friend is loyal and would never go there but why would he do that? Any of you have an idea

[Annia]

20 days here but still thinking about him everyday and very constantly.