Older adults, what comes to mind when you see young teen couples in love?

[loveconquerer]

Does it make you think of your young love you once had? Are you like "oh, that's so sweet!" Does it make you put aside or tune out the memories of all other people you were once in love with?

 

I am hugely jealous of my cousin and her boyfriend. They are a young teen couple. Madly into each other.

 

I never got to experience young love.

 

To make matters worse, I drove through the town of the girl I lost my virginity to. I broke down after having suicidal ideation and I drove 8 hours away to her hometown and walked the places we walked. She cut contact with me completely, despite us losing our virginities to each other and spending time with each other at the theme park the next day. I miss her so much. To her it was a hookup. It was never love to her.

 

But it dawned on me. I am 21 and never experienced teen love. I know teen love is not all what it's cracked up to be. But I think it brings out a special kind of emotion in people even if the relationship ended badly. I think people still think back to the first time they were in love when they see either their children in relationships or other teens in relationships. And they can still think of how sweet it was. They can look at the good of it instead of the bad.

 

But what I don't get is that people can still think fondly of their teen loves when they were younger, even if it ended on a bad note. But any other relationships they had when they were older that did not end so great, they can basically tune those out.

 

So am I justified to feel sad about this? That I can never be remembered so sweetly and fondly if my future relationships end badly despite all the goodness that happened before it ended? But young love relationships can be thought of sweetly no matter what?

[Seraphim]

I think it is cute. That is all.

 

I was never in love until 22.

[loveconquerer]

I think it is cute. That is all.

 

I was never in love until 22.

 

So you never were in love before then? No serious relationship? Wow.

 

So you can't really provide insight then.

 

I am 21. Think I am in love but I still could be wrong.

 

I told you about me and this girl hooked up and I have fallen for her. I can say I have intense feelings for her at the very least. But she does not remotely feel the same about me.

[Seraphim]

I had crushes but not what I would call love as a mature adult but I called it love as a teenager. Now I know that was not mature real love .

[Capttrae]

It's fun to watch. Do I really think about my high school gf when I see it? Nah not really. If I do, it's just briefly. Then I hope the best for them and go about my business

[1Love1]

Honestly, the only thing I think of when I see young teens in love is "Teen hormones make everything seem so much more dramatic than they really are"- the highs, the lows.. they seemed so extreme at the time.

 

My 3 year relationship from 16-19 ended terribly. I remember how intense the feelings were, but I don't look back fondly and think "Ahhh, I'll miss those feelings" or think fondly of my memories of him. Quite the opposite actually.

 

Each person you're with leaves a different impact. You could be someone's first or someone's 12th and leave the same impact on them. It just depends on what they think of you as a person, how the relationship ended, etc. a lot of factors come into play when determining your residual feelings towards a past relationship

[abitbroken]

People who were not in love as teenagers CAN offer insight. Looking back, we know if we were in love or not.

 

I never even went on a date until 21. And it didn't involve kissing, sex, or anything like that at all. It was a simple date - out to a movie and back.

 

I don't really think teenagers have the experience to really be in love. You can be infatuated, you can get attached to someone, but I don't think I could have really loved someone on a deep level at that time. I was trying to figure out who I was and as mature as one thinks they are - we are just not emotionally mature at 15,16, etc. We can be RESPONSIBLE in ways =mature in some areas, but that does not make us fully emotionally developed

 

I told you about me and this girl hooked up and I have fallen for her. I can say I have intense feelings for her at the very least. But she does not remotely feel the same about me.

 

Hooking up is about bodies and hormones and rubbing your parts together and it feels good. Of course you feel you are falling for her. For her, she got physical with you and she doesn't feel that it means that she loves you. It confuses matters when you make out or have sex with someone you are not in a relationship with first - you should know for sure how they feel about you before anything. It makes you feel in love and to desire that person when they may not feel the same way.

 

This is lust, not love.

[krose95]

What's there to be jealous of? I honestly laugh at teen couples. Most of them act like their relationship is the only important thing in the world and they're gonna get married. It usually doesn't end that way.

 

I was 17 when I first got a boyfriend and the attention was a new world and you get wrapped up in it, but why would you be jealous of it? You do cute things like go to the movies and what else?

 

Nothing really compares to being emotionally stable and in a long term, mature adult relationship when you're older where "he didn't text me for an hour" isn't the biggest issue in the world. Wait it out.

[thejigsup]

To be completely honest, I don't really notice them. I have way too many adult problems and distractions going on in my head. I was in love, or thought I was, at 16. It really wasn't that important in the story of my life. So many more significant things have happened since then.

[4dvz]

When I readed the original post I wanted to puke. Not because it contained something I found "horrible", and I don`t mean to be offensive at all, but the fact how much I just disagree with that way of perceiving love.

Whether you are 15, 25, 40, 60 or 70 the love will stay just as wonderful as it has always been if you just believe in it. Love does not degrade in you, unless you get bitter.

You age, gain experience, etc, and change as a human being all time long. The choices you make define you, and also your way of seeing life.

I believe love gets better in you, more profound, the more you understand it, all time long. You just need to believe in it.

 

But in the other hand I understand what you might be after in this thread, the "flame" and "sparks" young love demonstrates. It might be a sore fact that most of the adult-age couple lose it at some point, but I hope that is not the case. You can still have it in you no matter how old you are, the other dilemma tough is to actually find a partner who shares that same mindset and is willing to work for it.

[IAmFCA]

If I were in love with an ex, I can not be in his company without feeling the emotional intimacy I always felt, whether it be the guy I loved as a teen - who was not my first nor do I think that's relevant - or a man I loved as an adult.

 

I generally don't assume anything or think much about others when I see them together, regardless of age - unless one party seems predatory necessitating an intervention. I don't who is in love, who is in lust, and who is good friends. There is nothing to think about. I have no sentimentality about my past or my children's past either.

 

Its gone, and I took from it what I wanted to keep. I am.focused on today.