Weird behavior, not sure how to classify it or deal with it.

[renaissancewoman101]

Ever since I was a child, I always, after a period of time passes, rock myself back and forth (think of it as twisting back and forth). I do this, a lot of times, without even knowing I am doing it. I really make a conscious effort though, in public, not to do that since I tend to attract negative attention. My mom HATES it when I do this "rocking back and forth". She used to sneak up behind me when I was doing it (since it seems I kinda tone out or whatever and I dont notice her), and she would yell at me to stop it and scare the bejesus out of me. When I sit down, if it is an office chair, I will swing back and forth slightly. When I am at work, I try not to do this, since I know people will think I am weird, so I usually stand at my desk and do work that way. A few co-workers have chided me and jokingly said "are you scanning for planes"??

 

A few times when I am out with my mom and waiting at a restaurant to be seated, she's told me to stop rocking back and forth (and I don't even notice I am doing it). I know if I play on my phone (check email or go online), I am less prone to do the rocking motion.

 

I have never gone to the doctor to see why I am doing this. I don't think it is a nervous/anxiety issue, since I am on anti-anxiety meds, and I still do this.

 

Is it some type of stimming behavior? I am puzzled as to how to deal with it, since I think it attracts negative attention, and ex-bfs have pointed it out to me before (by asking delicately why I rock back and forth).

 

Any idea what it might be?? Or how to find ways to deal with it? It sometimes is an involutary thing, like I don't actively MAKE myself do it. Hard to explain.

[Hellboy]

I think it is anxiety related and is an OCD type behavior that subconsciously helps to relieve some of your anxiety. Talk to your doctor and maybe a med adjustment will help.

[Seraphim]

Maybe just go and be assessed by a doctor? It could be that it is a comforting motion to you. So it could be a self comforting motion that you do and now you don't even realize you do it. If you were autistic I could see it as a stimming motion. But many people rock that aren't autistic. I know when my mother is stressed and she is at home if she is sitting down she tends to rock sometimes.

[SpottiOtti]

Sounds like a self-soothing behavior to me, or some type of tic . . . Sucks that you feel judged for it, because it is who you are and what you do.

[Seraphim]

Sounds like a self-soothing behavior to me, or some type of tic . . . Sucks that you feel judged for it, because it is who you are and what you do.

 

That too, some people have physical tics. And it does sound like self comforting yes.

[renaissancewoman101]

I never thought of it being that way, a self-soothing behavior. It's just so insidious, like I unconsciously will slip into that rocking motion. And yes, people can be VERY judgemental, esp in the workplace.

 

I may go see my doctor or get a referral to see a psychatrist, to see if I can get my meds adjusted or put on new anxiety meds.

[Cheetarah]

Rocking is very soothing. I don't know if I ever do it on a day to day basis, at say sitting at a desk. But then again, I didn't even realize that I do it at night when trying to sleep until someone pointed it out to me. Right now, just for the sake of it I am swaying back and forth and it's incredibly relaxing and balancing feeling.

 

It sounds like it's probably a self-soothing thing.

[Fudgie]

My sister does that but it's a stimming thing, because she is autistic and you are not...so it's not stimming for you.

The only bad thing about it is that she broke her old bed over years of doing that and her hair is awful in the morning.

 

It sounds like it's self-soothing. I don't think it's a bad thing. If you are okay with it, then there is nothing wrong with it. It sounds like it's not the rocking that bothers you but people's reaction to it. If it's an old habit, would you feel comfortable telling people "it's just a habit, don't mind me!" and laughing it off?

[renaissancewoman101]

I guess it's a self-soothing thing (like a security blanket).

 

Fudgie, you are right, my rocking doesn't bother me, just peoples' reactions, especially that of my mother. She still will yell at me to stop it if she comes up on me doing it.

 

Your suggestion about how to deal with the co-workers is something I could try.

[Fudgie]

I have some weird habits. My coworkers have seen me eat pureed mush for lunch from a cup, play classical music, and other little things like that. As long as you're not being disruptive, loud, gross, etc. it doesn't matter if you don't fit 100% into everyone's idea of "how everyone should be". I don't apologize for myself and I just shrug my shoulders and say "well it's me" and no one has ever given me a problem about any of it.

 

Your mom is being cruel to you.

[Batya33]

I have a nervous tic -I play with my hair (and it's been pointed out). When I am in a situation where that would be especially inappropriate I make a strong effort to keep my hands in my lap or together in some way so I don't do it. My suggestion is that you try the same. I realize that it helps you/benefits you in some way but the downside is that people around you are distracted by it and uncomfortable interacting with you when you do it. It can be a private behavior or a behavior around those people who are comfortable with it. I do not like how your mother chose to deal with it.

 

It's up to you whether you want to look into this further -I don't think it's too much of a big deal as long as you can choose to control it as needed.

[sara-pezzini]

yup i think it is self-soothing, i do it too! ever since i was a child, and it doesn't bother me or anyone around me, i used to have a so called best friend who flat out told me to stop because it annoyed her, now that comment was annoying to me lol....

if it doesn't bother you or hinder you then i don't see a reason to stop or seek help or whatever...

[Seraphim]

Yes, many people have nervous tics. My husband has two of them. My mother also has one ,she twirls her hair while at home until it's like little knots all over her head.

[penelope13]

Stereotyped/repetitive behaviors are a common trait in autism spectrum disorders, but also occur in non-autism related behaviors. There hardly ever exists a behavior that is only occurring in a disorder. Mostly, it depends on the frequency of a behavior before it is considered indicative of anything and it also depends on other behavioral patterns being present at the same time. Most bona fide behavioral diognoses also present themselves with a vast variation how it manifests in an individual, ranging from extremely mild to severely impacting someones life.

 

Given your struggles with anxiety it is likely there may be a link, however, you should see a professional to be properly evaluated and then discuss what may be your best options (if you feel it is warranted to do something about it). Cognitive Behavioral Therapy is quite promising for learning alternative coping mechanisms.

[browneyedgirl36]

I agree with the others -- it's a comfort thing. I have, in the last couple years, started doing it too, often when I'm alone, but occasionally around others. No one has ever commented on it, though. It makes me feel calm. I have kind of low-grade anxiety -- not to the level where medication is needed, but I get really stressed out at times, especially when I have PMS, and sometimes when I'm standing still, I will rock back and forth a bit.

 

I'm sorry that people are giving you a hard time about it, especially your mom. I know from your other posts that she is quite critical of you, and I know that hurts. I think she's way over-reacting, especially since this behavior probably isn't causing you any sort of significant problems (i.e. impacting your job performance, etc.) I have two friends who have ADD, and they tend to shake one knee up and down constantly when they are sitting still. One of them does it so much that it's VERY noticeable, but I've never said anything to him. I admit, in a meeting (we're colleagues), it can be a bit distracting, but I know he can't help it. It's not like he's chewing gum and smacking loudly, or smoking, or humming loudly or something!

 

It might be a good idea to talk to your doctor about this; maybe, too, look into meditation techniques that might help to quell your anxiety a bit.

[renaissancewoman101]

Thanks again for all the advice. I think I will see my GP and see if my anxiety meds can be adjusted.

 

The more I think about it, I think this is mostly a self-soothing thing. It does help calm my anxiety down.