College freaking me out/making me depressed. Help!

[greywolf]

Rose, I have seen a common theme in many of your threads. You ask people for advice on how to fit something into your schedule (exercise, school, etc.), and when people do give you advice, you come up with a number of reasons why it can't be done.

 

It's your attitude that is holding you back. If you always think, "I can't do it" then you really won't be able to.

[Rose21]

Oh I don't think "I can't do it" I even try my hardest in a math, but nothing I do seems to help.

[Cal Lily]

I wish I could fly over to wherever you are at and help you !!! Which math are you taking? Math115? Which book are you using???

 

(ps. gotta love the penis quotes !!!)

[Doc Blaze]

can you really say you have given 110 percent in all your classes ..from the past threads...i dont think so..im you i dont know so dont take it the wrong way....its discipline, being organized and working your butt off to do anything you can to pass whatever motivates you to do better,use it...if you cant do 5 classes...do 3 and get all A's its stilll full time...ive seen many people in my classes who have have disabilities ..you cant use that line your whole life..the world doesnt care....my gpa once got down to about 1.4...u know what i did...stopped going out on the weekends...stopped going out period....locked my self in my room...and studied studied studied..you know why, because i wanted my AA....you dont have to be extreme but how much do you want good grades...its true, if you put your mind to things,geat things can happen..i started studyig an hour or so a night and i raised my grades to B"s...then i started bringing notes everywhere i went so if i had a 10 min break, i would read over it....its little things can make a big difference

[Rose21]

I'm not going to go anywhere this weekend with friends.

 

It's study weekend. And I could NEVER get a A in math. I haven't gotten an A, well ever. The highest grade I've ever gotten was a C, I got a B in my senior math class but that was math "models" which was more on budgeting (which I'm good at!) And using your calculator well anyways. Didn't use formulas or alg or anything.

 

4 classes is full time here. 12 hrs is, so each class is worth 3.

 

I will take 4 next term, no night classes. And just keep it simple.

 

I'm taking one summer semester and I'm taking 2 classes. One campus, one online. After that, provided I transfer to another school I'm pretty sure I only have 2 left. But i may take one more easy easy one, just to raise my GPA you know, and get an A in it. Like Creative Writing!

 

And to answer your question, I'm in beginning math for the 2nd time, soon to be a 3rd. Than I have Intermediete (hopefuly I can skip that by either testing higher on the THEA or going to a different school) Than the one that gives me credit, Stats.

 

Do you think it's worth it to transfer to another community college for one semester, if it's one less math class and I have to worry about and not stress about all of my classes being dropped for a remidial?

[petite]

Rose, I think many people on ENA have been very helpful to you in many different ways. Not just this thread, but also most other threads you have posted. Having said that, it seems like you really don’t take any advice given to you on board. You seek advice but seem to think that after all you are in the right about every single topic. You’re obviously not studying hard enough and I feel I can say this because you complain about having no time or working too much, taking too many classes, modeling, friends while studying seems to really come last.

 

You say you postponed “modeling” until the summer. If you really are seriously about what you want in the future, career wise forget about modeling. It isn’t bringing you in a steady income and you really have no time to spare since you’re struggling with classes. It also seems to me that your studying isn’t really a priority, you say you can’t live by a schedule, well reality is, that any successful person has to have some sort of schedule. Having a schedule, planning out your days and sticking to that routine will actually help you. You need to allocate a certain amount of time for study, but by your posts it seems like studying takes a backburner and friends or other things come first.

I realize you’re young and have plenty more to learn, friendship and life in general, but you have to decide what you want your priority to be. You either make your studying a priority and friends/family second or you don’t complain.

 

You posted above “I'm not going to go anywhere this weekend with friends. It’s a study weekend.” I find this very strange that you even need to mention not going anywhere with friends. There shouldn’t be a special study weekend just once; every weekend should be a study weekend. You need balance. Naturally if all you do for a whole weekend if study it will get old pretty quick, that is why you have to allocate a certain number of hours on a daily basis for studying and everything else in your life should work around your school and study hours not the other way around. I posted you a timetable of just one week while I was at University and as you can see my study was a priority along with keeping fit and healthy. Most weeks I would study all 7 days, but I made sure to have balance in my life, which by your posts you seem to be lacking.

Please don’t take this as an offense, but you really need to sit and think about what you want in life and school. If you want a career, than your school has to be priority and unless someone is chronically ill or dying they come secondary.

 

You say how you don’t have time for exercise or this and that. I feel these are just pointless excuses because on other threads you say that you don’t have a normal sleeping pattern, which plays a big part when it comes to school and studying. Make a vow to yourself for YOUR own good to put school and study a priority. Forget about what happened until now and concentrate on the future from now on.

Get a tutor, get help in any way you can and do not use your ADHD as an excuse. I know people with ADHD who lead successful careers and lives, who completed Masters or PhD in Law and didn’t use their ADHD as an excuse.

We can all use some problem we have as excuses to not do things or say “We can’t, or If I could, If this were different”.

Reality is, you have a problem ADHD and Dyscalculia you need to work around that and get proper help in order to pass all your classes.

 

If I were in your situation, I’d have a good long talk with my parents and ask them to help me out. Ask them to either get you a tutor or if they can support you while you’re at school. They need to realize you need help and I know you’re an adult, but some adult students need more help than others.

If a job is getting in the way of your studying than that also needs to come secondary. Your working hours need to go around your school and study schedule and not the other way around. The most you should be working weekly is about 16 hrs and not an hour longer, since you are having problems with school.

 

This is my honest advice and I mean you well. Good Luck!

[Applewhite]

Oh I don't think "I can't do it" I even try my hardest in a math, but nothing I do seems to help.

 

And I could NEVER get a A in math.

 

Really now? Contradicting yourself much?

[Applewhite]

Rose, I have seen a common theme in many of your threads. You ask people for advice on how to fit something into your schedule (exercise, school, etc.), and when people do give you advice, you come up with a number of reasons why it can't be done.

 

It's your attitude that is holding you back. If you always think, "I can't do it" then you really won't be able to.

 

You seem to be doing exactly what greywolf said, even if you denied it.

[Firiel]

This. On Friday I did class/homework till about dinner time. Today I woke up early and did some reading... then went to the library when it opened at nine and stayed there till four. Took the rest of the day off. I'm waking up early tomorrow and doing homework till church, then spending the afternoon researching. And I consider this a lazy weekend for me. School takes a lot of time and effort. Rose, you are only in a community college right now. I know for me, the jump between lower division classes and upper division classes was very jarring, and that was at the same four year institute. Even if you do manage to scrape by with a 2.0 GPA, if you don't better your study habits, you will have a very difficult time succeeding when you transfer to a four year school.

[Capricorn3]

I don't stick well with schedules, it would just be a waste. I don't like living on a schedule, I like to be in charge of when I do things and when I don't.

That's why nothing is working for you. That's why you are freaking out. That's why you find you "don't have enough study time" etc etc. If you want to make a success if things, then you HAVE TO have a schedule. So far, your lack of schedule is obviously not working, and you seem to find every excuse under the sun as to not have schedules or that you "can't" stick to a schedule. You either take college/studies seriously and start making a schedule, or you find lots of excuses and fail. Choice is yours.

[sophie274]

Rose, can you describe for us how much you currently study for your classes, or how you prepare for them and for exams?

 

Something like:

 

"XY class: I spend X hours a night doing the reading, and then if we have an assignment due X day I start it on Y day and work on it Z hours ..."

 

Just so we can have an idea?

[Rose21]

Well it really seriously depends on what kind of assignments/tests I have for the week.

 

For ex: I have 2 papers coming up.

 

I have a 5 page paper due tomorrow night at midnight.

 

Yet I spent nearly the whole day working on it with just going to my interview, dinner, and taking like a 2 hr break for T.V. etc.

 

I managed to make it double that at 10 pages, and it turned out pretty damn well!

 

I've done a 25 page ABC booklet before which was a research/poetry booklet for english, took me 8 hrs straight and I was up til 5 am and had to get up at 6:30, but hey I got a perfect score on it! Believe it or not, waiting to the last minute (unless it's a test) works well for me! I seem to do well on projects like that unless it's something real difficult that requires a lot of research.

 

I have a 2 page paper due Friday, which I will start on either Monday or Tuesday. It's fairly easy, and last time I did one of her 2 page papers I did it in an hr and got a 100%.

 

However, I have a 10 page paper due in like 2 weeks and I'm going to work on it this week, half of it this week, half of it next week. Or if I have more free time, do more than.

 

I'm also going to study my ass off for exams/tests.

 

I believe I have a test this Friday, so I'm going to study a little bit each day. And this isn't a "normal" test, it's the teacher that is really hard, that I studied for 5 hrs and still got a D on it, almost a C, but still not good enough! I really wasn't expecting anything less than a B on that I studied so well.

 

And I've done bad on all of her tests, and this is our last one before the final so I am going to STUDDDDY!

[Applewhite]

Don't think in the short run. The schedule is for the long run. If you studied 20-30 hrs a week, then you would have time to get everything done regardless of which particular assignments have deadlines.

[turnera]

One thing I tell my D19 is to put in a standard X hours every week whether you have something big coming up or not - in other words, if you don't have a paper or whatever, put those hours into rereading your chapters, or firming up work you've already done, or reading more about your subject so you are more well-versed. That way you feel better about yourself all the time, because you're better prepared than the rest of the students - less stress!

[Applewhite]

One thing I tell my D19 is to put in a standard X hours every week whether you have something big coming up or not - in other words, if you don't have a paper or whatever, put those hours into rereading your chapters, or firming up work you've already done, or reading more about your subject so you are more well-versed. That way you feel better about yourself all the time, because you're better prepared than the rest of the students - less stress!

 

This is what I mean in my above post. Well said. Rose what do you think about doing this? Right now do you think you study 30 hrs a week? Do you think you would still have problems if you studied 30 hrs a week?

[turnera]

I was always taught that I had to study 3 hours for every hour I attended class in college. It pretty much worked out that way.

[Rose21]

30 hrs??? I do not have time for that.

 

I'm thinking on average maybe 5-10 hrs a week, if I'm working real hard maybe 15-20.

 

30 is waaaay to much. I'll go insane.

[Applewhite]

30 hrs??? I do not have time for that.

 

I'm thinking on average maybe 5-10 hrs a week, if I'm working real hard maybe 15-20.

 

30 is waaaay to much. I'll go insane.

 

How many hours a week do you work?

[Applewhite]

Here is some example of how 30 hours a week is feasible.

 

Let's say you work 20 hours a week (and if you are in school full time you really shouldn't be working much more than that).

 

A day is 24 hours. Let's say you sleep for 10 hours (which is more than you should). There are 14 hrs left. 14 = 4+4+6. 4 Hours of study, 4 hours of work, 6 hours of relax time, eating showering TV etc. This is a weekday schedule. With just this you are already studying 5x4=20 hours a week and likewise working 20 hours a week.

 

If on the weekend you study 5 hours each day (If you start at 7 AM you can work until noon and still have all the rest of the day to do whatever you want) You now have 30 hrs of study time. With PLENTY of free time (48 hours a week to be exact). In fact your free time is MUCH more than your study time. Your free time is almost as much as your study time+ work time!!! So I don't understand how you don't have time like you say. What do you do? Do you work 40 hours a week or something? (Although we both know this is not true, in fact you have gone months without any work, right?)

 

Depending on your work schedule, the things I described for weekdays/weekends can be shuffled around keeping more or less the same proportions for the allocation of time.

 

Good luck.

[Firiel]

30 hrs??? I do not have time for that.

 

I'm thinking on average maybe 5-10 hrs a week, if I'm working real hard maybe 15-20.

 

30 is waaaay to much. I'll go insane.

 

And this is your problem right here. 5-10 hours is not nearly enough time to devote to homework. As has been said earlier, you should be doing at least 20 (preferably more like 30), every week.

 

Even if you are working 40hrs a week (which you shouldn't be while going to school full-time, unless you are superwoman), you can be technically able to fit in 20 (or even 30!) hours a week of studying. It all comes down to time management.

 

Another suggestion: Spend your time with purpose. Instead of just sitting down and leisurely doing a task or two while at the computer while periodically checking Facebook, ENA, e-mail, or whatever will just eat up your time faster than you can believe. So in other words, don't do what I'm doing right now!

 

Question How do you spend your typical day? Can you give two or three examples of what a typical day might look like for you? Please include what might seem like short breaks (between classes, for lunch, before work, etc.).

[Rose21]

I guess it just seems like a lot and I'm not sure how to incorporate that in.

 

I don't have a job now, but I will get one soon. My work schedule usualy is 20 hrs minimum, no more than 35 a week.

 

Part-time.

 

A normal day, let's say it's Mon. I'll wake up at around 8, get ready and go to class which is 10-11. Than I'll do any errands I may run, if I am super tired I may take a 2 hr nap, if not I go home and relax a bit, eat lunch, and watch some t.v.

 

Than if I have homework or a test to study for, or a paper I want to get started on, I spend a few hrs spread out on that, than if I'm not too swamped with work I go hang out with friends.

Thats a day WITHOUT work.

 

 

A lot of times when I did have my old job I went to school 10-11, went to work like 2-10. How much time does that really leave me to study?

 

 

On like a Weds, I have classs 10-11. Get home, eat lunch, do hw, nap (maybe) etc. I don;t usualy have time for friends than unless it's a quick chat because than it's back to school at 6:30-9:20 and so on.

 

It really just depends, and work REALLY cuts into my time.

 

But the semester has 3 weeks left, and I NEED a job, I have bills and I owe $1100.

[Rose21]

And also, I have had this before, if it is a Weds I have hardly anytime to study.

 

 

Ex:

 

10-11 class.

 

12-6 work.

 

6:30-9:20 class.

 

That only gives me a few hrs after, and that's IF I want to go to bed at a reasonable time.

[petite]

Rose, are you even taking on board all the help people have given you?

 

5-10 hours a week is hardly enough for high school let alone college. In the timetable I provided you I think I had 38 hrs of study/essay/project time and that is only that 1 week. Many weeks I studied for 40-45 hrs.

 

Seems like your school isn't a priority at all, so you really can't complain then.

 

You're using the "time" excuse again. You have no time? Where does your time go? You are a student, your work hours should not exceed 15 hours. You seem to use the "no time" excuse for exercise and now study, what exactly do you spend your time on?

[jengh]

Wow, I put that much time in for ONE class. I look at university as being a full time job. If you want to excell, you need to do it that way. I'm someone who never opened a book in high school, I'm not a studious person... But I quickly learned that I have to now. No other way around it.

 

You need to quit making excuses and be proactive.

[Firiel]

Are you taking out loans for school? If not, you should consider it. Not paying for school upfront will lower your expenses greatly. And if you are, maybe you should take out more loans so you don't need to work so much. There's no point in paying for school upfront if you can't do well enough to continue in it because of the lack of time.

 

Monday: I don't see why you need two hours to get ready... cut down your time to one hour, at the most. There's an extra hour in the morning to study. If you work from 2-10, then do homework from 11-1:30. That's two and a half hours right there. So there's three and a half hours of homework time in a really busy day.

 

On Wednesday, you have plenty of time in the afternoon between your first class and night class. Maybe make that a homework only day. Just try to do four or five hours of homework between your two classes. If you work, that makes it more difficult, but again... one hour before school and an hour and a half at night gives you two and a half hours on a really full day.

 

And of course, you shouldn't have any trouble at all doing three to six hours of homework on days when you don't work. Then it's just a matter of sitting down and doing it.