Post here instead of contacting your ex!

[OneBrightStar]

I thought I would've heard from you by now. We're going on 10 days of NC.

 

I fight urges to text you random quotes from "The Office" like we did when we were together.

 

I really miss you and I can't shake the feeling that you are going to come back. Just not now, but soon.

[amabel196]

I f***ing hate you Ricky. To hell with you. I have put all of my self respect to the side, and all of my pride and I asked for you back you said no. I asked for you to be friends with me again and again and you said no. Then one day you said yes to being friends just because I drove you up the wall that much. You find out that I'm with other people and you stop being friends with me. WHAT THE HELL IS THAT?! You left me you tool.

After three f***ing years you would think we would still be friends, considering we were once best friends. But NO! For god sakes pull yourself away from the bottles on the weekend and take a look at yourself. You're lucky I ever loved you because no woman could in the state you are in. Just be thankful that I do.

But in saying that, I am moving on FINALLY. I feel as though I am really getting somewhere, and I look forward to my councilling session next week.

You didn't even reply to my "goodbye" email. Again, what the hell is that?!

You're too busy with everything that you can't even take the time to respond to a last email from the girl you fell in love with?

I am better than this, and you have made it quite clear that you are not. I am not the only one living in the past, you are.

Clean yourself up, get your act together, and then maybe I will want you back.

Until then, good bye.

I hope your life falls apart.

[kerri_nicole]

You have some cheek to blame not seeing your kids on me. You have been begged for help and to be there for them but you shoce not to. Then you tell me you have no sons and the reason you dont see them is because of me!

What a pig I hate you so much now I hate myself for letting you do this again and letting you abuse me and my family when they are the ones supporting your children when you dont. Who do you think you are you cant bully me anymore now no more I mean that. My kids are better off without you.

[dandan78]

I still think of you every day.

 

Letting go and getting on with my life doesn't mean I've given up on us.

[Superman87]

Never in my wildest dreams

did i think that i'd be on tv talkin 'bout me and you

girl..

 

i know ive seen it times before

same episode but a different show

so why are we in two

was it something i did or did not do to make you mad

didnt go out my way

supply everything that you asked

im confused

so tell me how we messed up

did we give up too soon

 

you can put it on me if you like

im just trying to make it right

baby

i just wanna start back

loving you the way i did before

yeah

tell me can we go back

if this love is real what we waiting for?

 

okay, let me get this straight

you say we never communicate

we're always at each other

we forgot how to love each other

and when was the last time

we both went out together

it used to be all the time

and now it seems like never

 

but girl, im listening

and i'ma change my mind

if you give me this chance

ill do it right this time

im only human babe

 

we all make mistakes

i swear i learnt my lesson

i hope its not too late

 

you can put it on me if you like

im just trying to make it right

i just wanna start back

loving you the way i did before

yeah

tell me can we go back

if this love is real what we waiting for?

 

i know it may not seem like the best thing

i feel i might be losing the best thing

all that we fought for

we worked so hard for

don't you remember

hold on

 

i just wanna start back

loving the way i did before

tell me can we go back

if this love is real what are we waiting for?

if this love is real what we waiting for?

i just wanna start back

loving you the way i did before

loving you the way i did before

tell me can we go back

if this love is real what are we waiting for?

if this love is real what we waiting for?

[WomanWriter]

Thanks for giving up on me the way my parents did. You hurt me for things beyond my control instead of talking with me and compromising together. You're just like my selfish parents...only care about me when it's convenient for you, but if it's not, you bail...just like my family. Thanks a lot for proving that no one actually loves me unconditionally.

[dandan78]

I wish I knew what would bring you back into my life.

[WomanWriter]

I really need to talk to you today, even though you wouldn't listen because you're just as abusive as my family. The thing is, I hate you because of what you've done but it's not really you, it's the people like you who rejected me early on.

 

You were right that my mother was messing up my life. And I guess you couldn't help me and didn't want to be involved anymore. But why did you shame you because I couldn't live up to your standards? That's what my evil parents did and do and then I had to deal with that from someone who I opened up to and trusted.

 

You were the only person I counted on. My family is unstable and I don't know what will happen to me now because I am broke, lost, unemployed, and have no relationships. I stay here in this HELL house because otherwise I'd be homeless.

 

That's what it comes down to....me being homeless? Why has everyone in my life, whom I trused so openly, hurt me so badly....destroyed me? I am sitting here wailing in tears because I put up with all this abuse from everyone and I am destroyed. I have no resources to help me. No one cares for me. I worked hard, went to school, paid off my student loan, prayed, taught myself how to do things, was always cooperative and a straiight A student, had to give my own money and possessions to my family and others who took them from me. WHo ever looked out for me? Who ever cared about me? No one! NO one cares about me!

[o_hopeless_o]

i dont want to care anymore. its only day one i wish it was month ahead of time. i dont even think you really loved me. you played me for a fool but at the same time i can only blame myself for believing the stupid things you said. you were everything i could have imagined in a guy and yet you disappoint me and i see you for what you are. saying you want to be single, but DAMN you were so fking good at acting committed to me, so good at making me feel like the luckiest girl, so damn good. so clever with you acting 2 days before you laid down the new. your acting impresses me. i fcking hate you, i hate how i still have feelings of being with you but i dont want that. i never want to allow myself to ever talk to you again, ever be a friend or an acquaintance. your the same guy you were when i saw you getting treated like trash, being a naive person. making dumb decisions. and its you who got lucky cause obviosuly i was ready to give you the world (you act liked it too) and your just a lil boy who wants to hoe around. i deserve better. i just thought we were made for each. i didnt think you were this guy, being so cold, crying probably cause of GUILT making me think thats its cause you still love me so much, BULLSH*T. i wish i could tell you this and how much of a loser you are right now. i hate these stupid feelings. i hate for letting myself fall. and all i can do is be mad/sad and cry my eyes out for you. you say it was real then why the fck did this happen? im ashamed i let myself fall for you. it was all lies.

[amabel196]

Rick I don't know how I feel anymore.

I have a feeling I'm moving on.. it hurts a bit less but the thought of you with other women still tears me apart.

But I don't feel the constant need to be with you now, which is good.

I'm finally getting there.

I still miss your friendship though.. but you don't need to know that.

[lonelyuk]

Melanie, I understand why you built up your wall but I had no choice in being made redundant. You were protecting yourself at a time when I needed you the most.

 

I had to take the job 250 miles away but I was willing to see you every weekend until work was available closer to home. It was so difficult to move away and you did nothing to help that, you said you would call and you didn't, you said you would text and you didn't.

 

I don't understand how you could just close up like that, it seems to me that you never loved me in the first place.

 

I have tried to reassure you over the last few weeks that I still love you but you just say you don't know how you feel anymore and you have your own stresses to deal with.

 

If we can't deal with our stresses as a team then we were never meant to be. I need someone who will be there for me when the going gets tough and just doesn't bail out. I was always there for you when you needed me and it hurts that I can't be there for you again.

 

Anyway, I hope you realise what a massive mistake you have made and don't make the same mistake in the future. Men aren't all the same.

[Hugwolf]

Tell me what you want from me without being selfish or blind. I don't know what to do anymore. The only power I have between us now is to stay NC and work on myself but I am so afraid of losing my best friend and I know you are too. Tell me, am I doing the right thing? Are you happier now without me in your life than you would be with me fighting to be a better man in your life? I know I neglected your needs and I want to make it right. I am so worried that NC will push you away further when more attention and appreciation from me is what you need. I want to come back and give you that, but I can't when you are dating other people. It sends me the signal that you are trying to move on. It hurts me too much. You have to have faith in me. Please have faith in me to make you happy again.

[123skyscraper]

i unblocked you from work IM today. i miss having you in my life. but you are so poisonous that i must not have you in my life. you give me too much drama and you will break up my current relationship for your own selfishness and ego. you are the ugliest person i know, but my not forgiving you and keeping you out of my life is best for me. i will talk to any of my ex's except you. despite what we shared, it was all a lie. go on and drift away in your life, you will never get anywhere if you dont solve the issues you have within. i found someone who loves me for me and who doesnt put me down on my faults and likings. you can go screw yourself and stop putting on that pathetic sad look when you see me. deep down inside your just a fake a-hole. i am so glad you are out of my life. i can smile again.

[dandan78]

God, I miss you and wish you would get in touch.

 

I wanna show you how well I'm doing and how far I've come but I don't think it would make a difference.

It goes against everything I know to back off and let the two of you get on with it. You know what I'm like and how I can imagine the worst.

I hope you get in touch soon x

[Get over him..]

S,

 

You were right all along, P was bad for me and hurt me terribly. I am writing this to say I am very sorry for I did to you.

I left you for P and I now know what its like to hurt so badly you can't breath. I don't regret not picking you because i believe that we weren't meant to be together but lately since P left me I have been feeling bad for how i treated you and what I did to you.

I am desperate to email this to you but I know you wont speak to me. I just wanted to tell you that I hope your happy and getting along just fine. all you ever did was care for me and love me terribly and I destroyed you just like P has done to me. Guess this is karma for you. Good luck, take care and be happy! xox

[Spondence]

Hey K,

 

We tried, i'm sorry it didn't work. I miss coming home and putting the kids to bed and watching the news with you. It was very comforting for a time. I hope you enjoy the new kitchen and get use the pool often. I loved doing that for you. They're of my most cherised memories. What you did was terrible but I understand. I forgive you. Be good with your life. Goodbye -M

[o_hopeless_o]

Here I am AGAIN sitting wondering what I did wrong, wondering WHY I wasnt good enough for him to stay then at the same time I know I did nothing wrong, that I was nothing BUT good to him, gave him everything he asked for. Acting like he wanted this so badly, that he was so grateful. I let him do everything and anything, wasnt taking him away from what he wanted. I trusted him and now its thrown back in my face. I dont think he really had deep feelings. Its so hard cause I sit and replay the conversation "It was real, I do love you" blah blah blah. How is it real if you left me? How is it real when you left and there was no real problems? Then asking me to be your "FRIEND?!" God I feel so dumb and Im only on day two. I just want to yell and tell him he is the biggest jerk. Why would you throw away a great relationship? then say I know. WHO DOES THAT?! Your the one who said you wanted this just as much as I did. How often do we get relationships like this !? It was probably all lies. The loneliness is kick my butt. I feel so alone. I dont know what to do. what you didnt want to commit? or was it just me? you made it so damn clear i was what you wanted. now im not? god.. Losing my appetite over this, so stupid. i hate this, i hate my feelings, i hate that i love you, i hate it! I HATE IT. I dont want to love you anymore. I thought so highly of you and now its destroyed. Why would you ruin that? I cared so much for you, accepted all your flaws, thinking the sun still shined out your asz! fck. here I am again sitting in front of my computer while your probably at home, or out having the time of you life with your stupid frat brothers. I bet your jealous of the BACHELOR status right? WHATEVER i hate yours guts. I never want to fall for you ever again. God forbid me I go back to you once you realize you made a mistake.

[OneBrightStar]

You know what ... this weekend set me back. I didn't see you or hear from you, but I did go to see my best friend this weekend. Had to drive the freeway I drove to see you and it made me ache for you.

 

It's amazing how broken I am over you.

 

But you'll realize just how great of a person I am. You know what I realized today? Tomorrow is a year since I've been with the company I am with, and in that year I have accomplished SO much. I went from being a temp. to being hired full-time and them giving me a very important client to handle. Guess who isn't there to celebrate all of this with me? You. And I almost pity you because I know I'm someone who will go far in life. I wanted you to be there to celebrate my milestones with me and I wanted to be there to celebrate yours. But something "clicked" in your mind and you decided you didn't want us to be together anymore. You say you won't give me the commitment I want, that the love and feelings never lessened, etc.

 

I miss you so badly.

[Nappyloxs]

Dear G:

 

I know I am writing you again. It’s been 12 days since I last wrote/texted you. This is my last letter. It’s a closure letter.

 

After more than two months of not speaking with you, I had to find my own answers and closure. As I have said before I am kind of thankful for this breakup. I learned a lot about myself and the relationship. I am not going to explain everything I learned, I basically did that already. As much as I wish it was just a break and not a breakup, I want to put closure to this relationship.

 

Our #1 problem was communication. We just did not communicate well. It wasn’t just you and it wasn’t just me. It was both of us.

 

#2, I lost a part of you when you read that email to S. As I said, before I did not communicate to you how much I really did love you during the relationship and attempted, in crazy ways, to tell you after we broke up.

 

#3 – 1000, I will skip.

 

I have come to realize and accept many of my flaws in the relationship. I should have been a bigger and smarter person. I was just stuck in a rut (as was our relationship). I am sorry for that.

 

This breakup has really devastated me. I love you, even to this day. You were my best friend. You were my dream girl. You were really everything to me. I lost all that. Because of how much you meant to me, it will take some time to completely heal and I understand and accept everything. I will always love you. I have come to accept that. It is just the way I am. You will have a special place in my heart.

 

I often think about us reuniting. I know it’s not going to happen. But I still think about it. I believe that our relationship would be stronger and better because of this experience. Just by me realizing how much I really love you and actually being able to communicate that to you would make our relationship stronger and better. As much as I want to sit here and try to “win you back,” nothing I could say or do would “win you back.” You wouldn’t believe me and you simply don’t care. The only way is if you want to come back. I often think that you will comeback because either you miss me or miss the relationship. Honestly, it is not going to happen. You hate me and you just don’t love me anymore. The last three months have made that clear. Plus, I have come to realize and accept that there are many more reasons why you will never comeback. I really don’t blame you. If I was in your shoes, I probably wouldn’t comeback either. I have started to accept that you’re gone forever.

 

There is so much more I could say, but I am not. I have thought so much about your point of view, mine, and the relationship. I have come to understand and accept so many things that are both right, wrong, and in the middle. In the end, all my answers lead to the same conclusions, and that is that you are gone forever and that I will always love you.

 

It’s funny. People tell me I should hate you or at least be over you by now or that you weren’t the right one. But I’m not and it’s not because I want you because you’re gone. It’s because I really love you, G. You are an amazing woman and I just love you for who you are. Honestly, I also don’t believe that if you truly love someone, you just “get over them.”

 

In the end, I love you G and always will. I searched and found so many answers to why we broke up and why you left. Some are right, some are wrong, some are in the middle. No matter, how much my heart wants you back; it has accepted that you are gone forever. I will always have a great memory of you and of us. Like I have said before, I believe that we had something truly special and rare. Although it is over, I am thankful for having it for 2 and half years. I’m truly sorry I did not realize and communicate this to you while we were together.

 

So for the last time, I love you. I am not going to contact you anymore. I understand that you have a new life without me that you enjoy and that I just have to let you go.

[OneBrightStar]

You're going to contact me this week ... I can feel it. Either on Wednesday or Thursday, but I feel like it's going to be Thursday, when you're off.

 

I think you're starting to really miss me and miss us.

[AutumnBorn]

B. -

 

Well, wasn't yesterday just a mess of emotional chaos for you? You think I should be over it all by now. Well, if my emotions, like yours, were as deep as a coat of paint, yes, I would be over it. I can't turn my emotions off. How fortunate for you that you can. At least you recognize that your emotions are "flat". Look at your sister...it must be genetic. At least it's apparent that our children took after me emotionally.

 

I'm sorry that I can't stop loving you yet. Nobody wants that more than I do. You lied to me again yesterday. "Pedro" had to leave for church. A. told me you got home, took a quick shower, and were off to have dinner with P. You didn't even have time to take her to the theater. You aren't protecting me with your lies. You tell me something, I assume it's a lie because you've told so many.

 

When I said something about "emotional unbalance in a relationship", you nodded and said you knew what I meant. So, P. loves you and doesn't know you're just using her for sex? She'll figure it out soon enough...or you'll end up settling again for someone for whom you don't feel passion. Your emotions are flat. Maybe you aren't capable of feeling real love and that's why you recovered so well and so quickly from our marriage. We were together 26 years. It took you, what? Two months?

 

In other news, I'm getting to know Andy. I look at him and think about how special he is...intelligent, spritual, wealthy, kind, funny, attractive, and he has a beautiful smile. I just wish he was closer to where I am. But then...A. will be heading off to college in 1.5 years, his daughter will be graduating next year, my job will eventually go away. And the really funny thing is, he's got a really good friend who works at the same company you work for. He's going to try to get a layover in Seattle when he returns from the Phillipines. If I'm lucky, it'll be the weekend of the office Christmas party - I'll have a date and, quite possibly, get laid!

 

I miss sex.

 

S.

[newlife03]

Ok so im having a hard day.

6 weeks now, ive been doing really well, not had many down days really, we both know this has been such a long long time coming.

The anger is leaving me, after your last escapade. It was funny how i only stumbled upon all those lies the same day you emailed me such sweet fluffy break up stuff.

How ironic to catch you out, yet again, with so many, many lies. Well, why on earth would i be suprised? Yet it still made me angry. Now i can sit and read it over and over again, anytime i feel like it.

By god you hurt me so many times. I dont understand the lying - i thought i did, but i dont. How can you look yourself in the mirror? How do you wake up each day and do that? I know i couldnt, just couldnt face myself for what ive done if i were you. Oh yeah, and by the way, i dumped you, remember? Or is that just another conversation you forgot - is that why you suggested anger management for yourself? A bit late now.

 

I do know that we all lie, little harmless white stuff, but these, well, how can you say that you dont remember things you said, things you did? Awful stuff, even when there were witnesses? And then, to post lies on an anonymous forum? But in a name we all knew so well? It was hardly deniable. Who on earth are you trying to impress with that s*** - no one knows you, knows me, do you think they really care? Do you think that my self esteem is so fragile (as yours is) that i care that anonymous people would believe your lies? It makes me scared for you, that you really are that delusional, that you believe your own crap - man, that scared the pants off me i can tell you.

 

Still, for all your constant madness and abuse, stupidly, i do miss you at times. I suppose im just not yet used to the peace and tranquility. I still have that car over my head, waiting for the drop, as it always did. For all those years. My 'state of readiness' as i now call it.

 

The worst part of it is, is that, ive been really kind in what ive said about you, because i know that whilst i can get out of this madness, you cant, your stuck in it for life. I know youve gone around painting me black - hmm wonder why that is.

Still im sad for you, so sad, and, for me too, because i had so much faith in you, that we could turn this around - but there was no we, i was in it alone, and boy have i felt alone for years, and to be honest, i was, you were always in your own little selfish world, all about you - what you wanted, needed, and craved, (attention,compliments, ego boosting and most of all saving) instability, spending, no future plans, hated the world and people in it, negative, ive never known someone to hate christmas, new years, birthdays - but you did, i cant think of much you did like actually. Your nearly 50 years old! Dont you feel frightened about that? I do, im 43 but life should not be this hard, dont you understand that? Why would you choose to live this one life you have this way? NEGATIVE, lying, game playing, manipulation.

 

What a fool i was to love you and have faith in you, that one day my love would conquer all! Ha, what a fool.

 

But you have taught me such an invaluable lesson. I know that i couldnt meet a person with so much emotional baggage again, i know that it just couldnt be that bad. The cancer lies, the hitting, the emo blackmail, the general violence, your anger, the constant financial pressure, sexual probs, mind games oh dear god. I had all the worst possible things there in one little sweet package.

 

It can only get better - it certainly couldnt have been any worse.

 

I just need a person to be understanding, caring, kind and supportive. You knew i never had that, but certainly, my previouses werent as bad as you.

One day i will have all that, and the wait will have been worth it - i know that, and thats what keeps me strong.

 

Our problem was i told you how it was, told you what you did was wrong.

We were bad for eachother because of that. You need an enabler like your ex - what did she tell me - she just took your abuse and walked away, not saying a word and then she cheated on you - lord, wonder why? You need a little mouse and im sure you will find her - sorry for her i must say.

 

Rant over, i know i will be back on the up and up tomorrow and seeing blue skies again.

[amabel196]

For god sake Rick, grow a pair and get over it. I have, but you haven't seem to moved on as you won't even walk past me in the street, you will take a turn early to get away from me.

Have a cup of concrete and harden up. You're as cold as concrete, so Im sure that hardening up and getting over it won't be an issue for you.

[OneBrightStar]

I wish I could share my life with you still.

 

It'll be a year since I started my job with the company I'm with now. I'm very proud of what I've accomplished so far -- I went from being a temporary assistant to handling my own client. I get my own BlackBerry tomorrow -- I'll officially be a working woman, in my opinion. If we were together, I would've called you up all excitedly ...

[dandan78]

I know it makes no difference but I want to tell you that I haven't done this for petty reasons. I haven't done this out of spite, I've done it out of love and respect for myself.

I'm not gonna play your games any more. I'm not going to chase you.

It is extremely difficult but I will get there and I will be the man I have always wanted to be.

Yesterday I realised that I still want your acceptance, that I want you to tell me how good I am and how well I'm doing. I realise how wrong this is and am gonna talk to my counsellor and therapist about it so I can change it, cos I don't know how.

I still analyse what you are doing and why. I still wonder what you are doing and if you think of me but every day the thought of US becomes less.

I realise now that I will always have some feelings for you but then I wouldn't be me if I didn't.

At the end of the day, although it was your actions that brought it on, my hurt has been caused by MY depression, My beliefs, MY expectations, MY lack of self-esteem and confidence.

I thought you were the one to save me but only I have the power to do that and I have started on that journey. It's not gonna be easy and I'm sure I'll make mistakes on the way, but I'll get there and you'll have lost the best thing that could have happened to you.