THE NO CONTACT CHALLENGE, Part 2

[SweetM2012]

I started NC after almost 2 months of calling, texts, emails that made me look pathetic. So start date 7/17/2012. We have a child, so unless it relates to her, I won't be contacting him at all. It's only been 2 days though, but I can tell you it feels like we just broke up. I'm really hurting.

[skheehee]

End of Day 16

 

Today was a mix of emotions. I thought about her at times, but kept thinking of all the bad stuff that she did to me during the relationship. And I thought to myself that since she was so eager to get into a relationship with any Tom, ****, or Hairy right after our break up, I guess she's not worth my time worrying over. The baggage that she has from our break up will be holding her down. She has issues that she has not resolved. I'm gonna pretend to not care anymore, even though a small part of me still does.

 

She hurt me, and kicked me to the curb, like a 2nd rate doll. Why should I waste time on someone so heartless...

[brickheart]

Day 3. Geez.

 

Had a dream about him last night. Still angry I broke no contact for such a stupid reason, giving into his breadcrumbs.

[ConfusingEx]

day 1.

 

was tough, after being played, i feel worse then i did my first attempt. can't get her off my mind, and what she told me in the sms about her wanting to be alone, i can't help thinking why couldn't she of just said she wanted space, not for a week, but time apart, but still be in a relationship with me, after i ask her why couldn't we be together, live in separate locations and still enjoy each others company, only reply i got was i'll reply to it but atm i can't because she was on her walk and couldn't really type.

 

so that was ages ago, and still nothing, I'm going crazy sitting here thinking, is bad news coming, is she just going to say something like, its just not easy, or is i going to be, i was thinking bout it, and some other good news might come out of it.

i don't want to break NC and say to her look are u going to reply or are u just avoiding the question and hoping it goes away, i don't want to sound pushy but i also need to know.

 

should i wait a few days, and maybe ask or see if she replies in that time. i think we actually got down to what one of the things was with us, and if it can be sorted out or even worked on we might have some kinda of chance, i know she is with some guy, but she's not happy i can tell, and its going to go down soon, i know i need to just wait that out and just be myself here, but i also want her to keep in mind what i said about, if thats all she wanted was relationship and live apart then I'm happy with it.

 

do women really keep things in mind, or do they say they will think about it in hopes it doesnt come up again, if we don't bring it up does that mean she's thought we forgot about it, or do we bring it up and risk being pushy because we are hurting here and want to know answers

[Livia07]

Ok so im on day 34 of no contact, i find it relatively easy tbh, but at the same time its got to the point where i want to talk to him....

 

Any advice? Btw, i literally just cut him off from the day we broke up (just happened that way i guess)

 

It would be much appreciated

[Blondie176]

Day 31, officially day 46 cause i haven't seen and spoke to her since the 5th of June.

 

Had 2 dreams about her and her new bf....

Even in my dreams she's stubborn and arrogant...

 

Good luck with the first day again some of you!

Well done on getting past day 30!! Good for you! x

 

I started NC after almost 2 months of calling, texts, emails that made me look pathetic. So start date 7/17/2012. We have a child, so unless it relates to her, I won't be contacting him at all. It's only been 2 days though, but I can tell you it feels like we just broke up. I'm really hurting.

Hang on in there sweetie, the early days are hell but it does does get easier with time. x

Ok so im on day 34 of no contact, i find it relatively easy tbh, but at the same time its got to the point where i want to talk to him....

 

Any advice? Btw, i literally just cut him off from the day we broke up (just happened that way i guess)

 

It would be much appreciated I guess only you know what you ought to do here, ask yourself if you can handle the rejection or being ignore if you do contact him? What if he has met someone? I dont know if we can ever be really prepared for that kind of crap..hmm... but hey someone has to reach out first x

[Blondie176]

Day 21

 

So this is what the home run feels like. \\

 

I have been so busy today with work that i havent really had the time to dwell too much on him. I lay in the bath just now and sort of felt some peace of mind, i feel calm tonight. Not sure if that feeling will last, if past experience is anything to go by then it wont lol but i am enjoying it while its here.

 

I think i may be removing those rose tinted glasses that have made me view him as some sort of love god this past few weeks, he wasnt, yeh sure he was a good guy, good lover and all that jazz but i may of built him up into some sort of Adonis in my mind, through grief i think ( crazy town makes us think all sorts huh) he really wasnt ALL THAT and i have had better.

 

I had a hot steamy dream last night and he wasnt in it ..dont ask me who the heck the guy was but Mannnn alive he was gooood... does this mean i am preparing myself for a new man or just that i am horny LOL..who knows..

 

Anyway, i am pretty tired so i think a hot drink and bed for me tonight ( rock n roll life i live..i know i know ) xxx

[jemoeder]

Decided to go NC after being tossed around emotionally by my ex for months. By now it dont matter who did what or said what.

 

She still is in my mind a lot, and i had to fight the urge to reply to a message i received relating to some major event in her life.

 

Im still doubting NC is the best for me and her because i once read here that treating your ex as you would like to be treated makes it easier to deal with it in the healing process.

 

Also i think it is kind of childish thing doing NC and never liked it when my ex did it to me. However i aint doing it to hurt her or to prove something. Im doing this for me, for what i need and want for the first time in this relationship and the aftermath of this relationship.

 

Unless she is dying i wont contact her.

 

Almost 24 hours NC and im feeling ok with it

[skheehee]

NC is for ourselves, and OURSELVES only. It is NOT a means to get our exes back, mates. It is a means of moving on with our lives. It just happens to be that when we're about to move on completely, sometimes, our exes would make make contact and like to reconcile, or whatever they have in mind. By then, you would be in a clearer state of mind to make a rational and logical decision based on taking time apart from each other and seeing the relationship and this person for what it is and who they are really.

 

Keep your chins up people! There are brighter days ahead!

[Pleasedonot5]

Day 3, attempt three

 

Not much thought about my ex today. Also had a date and lots of attention from people, which helps. The date went really well too c;

 

I'm getting used to the thought of never getting back together with her. The girl I went on a date with was fun and likes me for me. I was able to be my crazy self too, which was uplifting because I thought my ex was the only one whom I could act that way around. I think things may be looking up.

 

EDIT: But I just looked at her Tumblr account... and she reblogged a picture that said "forever my ass," and other sad relationship stuff, as if she's somehow the victim in this? I'm probably overanalyzing. I'm going to stop looking at her tumblr now. But, she's obviously hurting. For what reason, I have no idea. This behavior absolutley bewilders me, especially since I've told her my strong feelings for her, I'm open to reconciliation, and have improved myself. I don't know how to make myself more clear?

[tness]

Is it NC day 53 or 54. I'm not sure. She is back in my town now after vacation abroad. I feel panic now. Why doesn't she break NC

 

I'm slowly going insane ;(

[xmen777]

NC is for ourselves, and OURSELVES only. It is NOT a means to get our exes back, mates. It is a means of moving on with our lives. It just happens to be that when we're about to move on completely, sometimes, our exes would make make contact and like to reconcile, or whatever they have in mind. By then, you would be in a clearer state of mind to make a rational and logical decision based on taking time apart from each other and seeing the relationship and this person for what it is and who they are really.

 

Keep your chins up people! There are brighter days ahead!

 

When I broke NC it was because I felt I wouldn't have been myself. I didn't beg or anything of the sort and I'm happy I sent that message. Felt much better.

Now I'm still doing NC until we meet again.

[xmen777]

Is it NC day 53 or 54. I'm not sure. She is back in my town now after vacation abroad. I feel panic now. Why doesn't she break NC

 

I'm slowly going insane ;(

If you feel that way, consider the possibility of breaking NC in a non-begging way... Relax and try to take it easy.

[xmen777]

Day 3 - Attempt 2

 

Still thinking about the ex. Even thought if there was something I could have done more, but no, there wasn't.

Meanwhile I will keep the NC. When she'll be back I'll still be on vacation, then I'll probably see her. Hoping things work out. Was thinking about dating other girls again.

[tness]

If you feel that way, consider the possibility of breaking NC in a non-begging way... Relax and try to take it easy.

I will not break NC.

Im in this other dilemma now. Was seeing an other girl, and I made it clear that it was on a friendly basis. But I understood right away that she wants more. And that was to much for me. So I told her that we have to end, I initiated the NC. She talks about suicide, can't sleep at night, I have talked with her for about two months, no kissing no nothing.

I can't deal with that now. Double NC is my position now. One NC is easy, the other NC is killing me slowly.

[NjoyStick]

Day 32 or 47 officially, at my sister's house right now, took the road that had so many memories of her, she's in my head now and it hurts...

 

But f*ck her!

[jemoeder]

Day 2 and its getting hard haha.. We left things unfinished and i know that i want to talk to her one final time before i really can move on. but she ****ed me over, not showing up when we were supposed to talk just to make a point. she tried to contact me but i just could not respond,.

 

almost 48 hours but really she doesnt leave my mind for more than 5 minutes at a time

[Blondie176]

Day 22

 

I am almost scared to say it but....i think i am finally letting go.

 

I feel sort of at peace with things.....its a very odd feeling.

 

I am very aware of how my feelings and thoughts can change from one day to the next so i might be here in a few days in tears again haha

 

xxx

[brickheart]

Blondie, I'm so jealous! Every time my ex texts me, I keep texting back... Breadcrumbs are so annoying! I'm back to day 1... again... and I had the last word, but that's not a good place for a dumpee to be in.

[Blondie176]

Blondie, I'm so jealous! Every time my ex texts me, I keep texting back... Breadcrumbs are so annoying! I'm back to day 1... again... and I had the last word, but that's not a good place for a dumpee to be in.

Aw i would still love to hear from him though, just a hi, hello, how are you? anything....more so i could feel like i was not forgotten, but i have heard nothing, i dont know whats worse really? Hearing nothing or having them keep contacting you? xxx

[skheehee]

End of Day 17

 

Well, just another day. The hurt is still there, but it's not as bad as the first few weeks. NC attempt 3 or 4. I can remember which. I now know what kind of person my ex really is. The world would be a much better place if not for people like her. The worst part of it all is that people like me actually still love people like her, after what they've done to us. Love is really blind. It can lead you to walking right off a cliff.

[skheehee]

Aw i would still love to hear from him though, just a hi, hello, how are you? anything....more so i could feel like i was not forgotten, but i have heard nothing, i dont know whats worse really? Hearing nothing or having them keep contacting you? xxx

 

I hear ya. I wish things had gone down differently. But that's just wishful thinking.

 

I think either option is just as bad as the other.

[xmen777]

End of Day 17

 

Well, just another day. The hurt is still there, but it's not as bad as the first few weeks. NC attempt 3 or 4. I can remember which. I now know what kind of person my ex really is. The world would be a much better place if not for people like her. The worst part of it all is that people like me actually still love people like her, after what they've done to us. Love is really blind. It can lead you to walking right off a cliff.

I love my ex too... same here.

[skheehee]

I just had a weird but pleasant dream. In it, I met the woman I've been waiting for my whole life. The love of my life, so to speak. I cant remember how she looks like though... But I do remember falling madly in love with her in my dreams, and kissing her. It was the most wonderful feeling in the world. And then, she disappeared and I woke up in tears again. What does this mean? Am I looking too much into a dream? Is it just a fool's hope to think that I will find someone who I can spend the rest of my life with soon, after my heart was so viciously torn apart and shattered by another???

[gotanewbeat]

day one, attempt 5 probably.

 

things are going to be a lot easier now that we won't be seeing eachother at work.

he said something on friday about going out sometime, but i won't give in to it unless he initiates contact/seems serious about things. i still don't know if i'm able to be his friend yet or not - he really is one of my best friends, and someone i feel like i can tell anything to, but right now there's still quite a bit of resentment and i'm still really confused about what i want.

 

as time passes and my head clears a bit, i'm able to see things about myself that need improvement. i buckled down and quit my job because i'm under appreciated, underpaid, and overworked. it was stressing me out beyond belief, and i would wake up in the morning dreading having to go into work. he knew this, and on more than one occasion, he told me to quit. i never listened, partly because change is pretty intimidating and i really love the people that i work with... but in hindsight, i feel like my inability to recognize why i should quit is a part of what drove him away. if i'm not able to recognize what i deserve and am worth, why should he? i let him know what happened, and he was really supportive and happy for me and my decision. it's my subtle attempt at letting him know that i am working towards bettering my life and my situation, and it seems to be well received. i'll be the first to admit it's not the only thing i have to work on, but it's a start. i also know he has some stuff to figure out, and some time apart... without the constant support and friendship we offer to one another, will maybe help him sort out his feelings. it's really hard, and i'm constantly battling with everything that's gone on... but i know its for the best, and even if we never see each other again, i know i'll be okay.