Smanx5 Posted April 14, 2012 Share Posted April 14, 2012 DAY 106 It's hard --still hard-- I'll admit that I have gone to her facebook page on occasion, but still haven't engaged with her. There are few days that I never think of her, but those catch up with the days that I do. Sometimes it amazes me how I still haven't initiated contact with her. I found it odd that on day 72 she liked one my facebook statuses, hmm... I don't know how much longer I can stay in NC with her, but I HAVE to listen to what my logic is telling me over my emotions. One day this will all go away. One day I will be at my strongest. One day I will be healed. I need closure. Link to comment
ks1986 Posted April 14, 2012 Share Posted April 14, 2012 DAY 106 It's hard --still hard-- I'll admit that I have gone to her facebook page on occasion, but still haven't engaged with her. There are few days that I never think of her, but those catch up with the days that I do. Sometimes it amazes me how I still haven't initiated contact with her. I found it odd that on day 72 she liked one my facebook statuses, hmm... I don't know how much longer I can stay in NC with her, but I HAVE to listen to what my logic is telling me over my emotions. One day this will all go away. One day I will be at my strongest. One day I will be healed. I need closure. He deleted me the day after our breakup, but remained friends with all of my friends. Slowly they started to delete him, but my roommate was still friends with him and I kept using his account to stalk him basically. A couple weeks ago, I impulsively made him defriend him and I'm glad I did, but part of me just really wishes I hadn't, lol! The funny thing is after weeks of being broken up he though I was the one that unfriended him the whole time! Link to comment
Love1336 Posted April 14, 2012 Share Posted April 14, 2012 I have to say, I feel good. I haven't felt good in a while. I talk to my best friend, about the possibility of me breaking NC. (on your birthday) she threw a lot of facts at me. It really kick me out of my fog of love for you. I can't believe a month of NC. I am still in denial with you. I just.. don't feel... we're not fixable. I use that word lightly. Our issues, I feel... wasn't so bad. Looking at a clear mind(well kinda) I feel... maybe I was a bit much of a drama queen? I don't know. All I know... your birthday coming up. It will be the only.."good" reason to break NC without looking so... clingy. That is exactly 90 days from now. I don't know... how i will feel. But if I keep busy, and live my life normal. Hopefully, I won't break NC. If I do... hopefully I'll be heal, and won't care about the results. I'll be a girl who you knew wishing you happy birthday. Link to comment
lovebre Posted April 14, 2012 Share Posted April 14, 2012 Day 31/32 This trip home was exactly what I needed. This was the best I've felt in a long time; and I have my friends and family to thank for it. Definitely looking forward to moving back now in about 3 more weeks. Farewell, Atlanta... Link to comment
HopefulNessie Posted April 14, 2012 Share Posted April 14, 2012 I miss him right now. No particular reason, no cool news to share like before, I'd just like to hear the sound of his voice. I wondered again if he ever thinks of me. I also wondered about how his (used to be our) puppy is doing. I bet she is getting big I hope work is going well for him. Does he wonder about my school or work? Who knows... Link to comment
thisisnotdave Posted April 14, 2012 Share Posted April 14, 2012 Day 34 Not much to say. I'm thinking about contacting her tomorrow evening. Link to comment
danzman Posted April 14, 2012 Share Posted April 14, 2012 Day 6 (1?) Technically its the sixth day since I've communicated with her but its my first post. I'm finding the mornings difficult to deal with - my emotional side is fully in control and I miss holding her in my arms. I also feel like I have lost my best friend who I could confide everthing to. I guess I also have the fear that we all have that I didn't mean that much to her, or that she has already gotten over me, even though its been two weeks. Just need to remember that nothing good will come of contacting her (at least for a while anyway). Link to comment
transmit Posted April 15, 2012 Share Posted April 15, 2012 Day 3 I spoke too soon and I regret it now. Seeing him made me feel better for a day, and now each day away from him has felt progressively worse. He seemed so happy to see me, yet I'm losing hope he'll ever contact me again, so I was probably wrong. It's been almost a month since we broke up and while I'm definitely doing all right in my life - working out, get stuff done, eating well, seeing friends - I still find myself waiting and feeling terrible when I don't hear from him. And as my opinion of him gets worse, I'm more annoyed at myself for missing him. I guess this needs to happen before I can stop missing him. Link to comment
rhythm09 Posted April 15, 2012 Share Posted April 15, 2012 Day 32. Welp. I think things are progressing well. I made some new friends recently. I hung out with them yesterday and actually had a good time. It was kinda hard for a little bit since the places I went to were places I spent time with him, but then the memories would go away. And well, of course, some of these friends are taking interest in me. It's weird. In a way it makes me feel uncomfortable. Maybe because I'm not used to it considering I was with someone for six years. But whatever. It makes me feel real good that I can attract people. Ah man. This journey. It's looking up everyday as I engross myself with newer environments and people. It's getting exciting. Link to comment
thelees Posted April 15, 2012 Share Posted April 15, 2012 Day 1 and feel useless and upset. We used to text each other so much. Had a chat before I left and she said its not the issues we have in the relationship as she feels they can be worked through its the feelings that she has lost for me that she needs to see if they have truly gone or not. So unless it's for the kids we aren't texting, talking etc. Will see how I feel tomorrow! Link to comment
danzman Posted April 15, 2012 Share Posted April 15, 2012 Day 7 This has been my best day in 2 and a half weeks. I still miss and want her but not in a desperate emotional way, more a sense of sadness at what we once had together. For most of the day I have even felt resigned/ reconciled to the fact that the relationship is over. However I'm starting to feel a bit tired and I'm going to a place with a friend tonight which she and I used to go to together all the time. The memories will be painful but I have to get through it. Link to comment
LOSTINTHEDARK Posted April 15, 2012 Share Posted April 15, 2012 I will post here even if my story is different. I said hello a happy Easter as a friendly message (it was late message)-thursday - with no response and I feel terrible. I will accept this challenge. I did 2 weeks i a row, but went to square 1, so I am in day 3. Link to comment
Leighk27 Posted April 15, 2012 Share Posted April 15, 2012 Today is my DAY ONE! I have decided to do this as he text me an hour ago to ask about bills we or i had to pay and he has made me feel so stupid and foolish. He asked me how i was and i replied honestly that I was getting there slowly. I asked how he was and he replied with "bye leigh im going". He didnt even reply with an answer. He has now made me feel so crap n all my progress has been knocked down the floor. So here I go....I can do this Link to comment
flatplane Posted April 15, 2012 Share Posted April 15, 2012 Day 30 NC and NIC. Had an ok day today. Getting there. Link to comment
HopefulNessie Posted April 15, 2012 Share Posted April 15, 2012 I miss him a lot right now. Im with the family, having a good day together. It makes me wish I could share it with him. I hope he's enjoying his Sunday. Link to comment
transmit Posted April 15, 2012 Share Posted April 15, 2012 Today is the worst day yet. I feel completely horrible. I'm not suicidal but I don't want to live. It's been almost a month and I haven't heard a single word from him, aside from our 2 meetings to exchange things. It's so hard to believe he doesn't care. I've been doing everything I can to be good to myself. Taking care of my body. I've been offered a great career opportunity. Friends are so kind to me. But deep down I'm so miserable and I don't want to bother anyone with it anymore. Every day starts out with potential, and I promise myself I won't be thinking about him contacting me. But inevitably when it becomes clear he won't contact me, my day is ruined and all I can do is go to sleep. Rinse and repeat. When will it end? Link to comment
thelees Posted April 16, 2012 Share Posted April 16, 2012 Day 2 - part 1 The first morning waking up knowing I can't contact her. Feel really depressed right now. I'm hoping that she is feeling the same but know she won't have thought too much about it as she will be getting kids ready for school etc. I feel very emotional at the mo. just wish that I wasn't awake. 9 years of marriage and it has come to this. Will post later on as it's early and things may improve - doubt it though! Link to comment
thisisnotdave Posted April 16, 2012 Share Posted April 16, 2012 DAY 35 Almost broke NC today. I was dead set on it actually. But I didn't. Link to comment
LOSTINTHEDARK Posted April 16, 2012 Share Posted April 16, 2012 I will post here even if my story is different. I said hello a happy Easter as a friendly message (it was late message)-thursday - with no response and I feel terrible. I will accept this challenge. I did 2 weeks i a row, but went to square 1, so I am in day 3. I am in day 4.. Feeling a lot better. Link to comment
danzman Posted April 16, 2012 Share Posted April 16, 2012 Day 8 Generally coping pretty well, though was sad this morning and just now - although I want to contact her this very instance, I know I shouldn't and won't until some time has passed. At times I am almost glad that it is has happened - as in the breakup occurred now rather than later - then I just remember how happy we were together or her laugh or smile and those thoughts vanish from my brain. Link to comment
Divine010 Posted April 16, 2012 Share Posted April 16, 2012 Day 8 Although he is not good for me. He put me through so much heartache. I have to continue to place the bad thoughts of him to move on. But I still miss his presence. The times we traveled, the places we visited. Is he thinking of all that we did together. It will be hard to replace those memories unless I move to another part of town. We did everything together and now that its warm out, it's so tough. Link to comment
lovebre Posted April 16, 2012 Share Posted April 16, 2012 Day 33/34 These last few days have been GREAT. Spent time with my family and friends all weekend, got my hair done, did my nails, & bought a few new outfits for this week. I had been neglecting myself all this time, but now that I look good, I feel even better. Haven't heard or seen from the ex in weeks, which is great. I've been feeling so good and I don't want him ruining it. Link to comment
chrisbuilder Posted April 16, 2012 Share Posted April 16, 2012 NC 18 days, after breaking NC with one stupid message. Not counting the message, it would be NC 45 by now. That's how long it is since we actually had contact, because she never replied to my message. So, hitting the gym five days a week, went for 63kg to weighing 69,5 (I was actually under weight! We come in all shapes and sizes). Adamant to finally get some arms, as one of her parting comments was that I have arms like a little girl. Such a nice thing to hear after having travelled 4 hours by train, then waited five hours at the airport to surprise pick her up. I guess it takes somebody especially stupid to shrug of a comment like that! Well, guys like me go dumb when a put-down like that comes packaged in a beautiful smile, radiant eyes, 1.30 legs and perfect beauty. Dumb dumb dumb.. Should have looked at the door and start packing my stuff there and then. If only I could go back in time and follow my gut instead of melting away in those eyes. Weak. Link to comment
transmit Posted April 16, 2012 Share Posted April 16, 2012 Feeling much better today. 5 days NC. Running errands, cleaning around the house. Noticing (good!) changes in my body. Submitted a deadline's worth of work, now taking it easy and hopefully seeing friends tonight. If I can help it I don't want to ever feel as low as I did last night again. Link to comment
HopefulNessie Posted April 16, 2012 Share Posted April 16, 2012 Have mixed feelings today. I am positive yet nostalgic at the same time. Signed up for 5 fitness classes, about to get a new gym membership, did a lot of thinking about how I will find time to do my hobbies again I'm very excited for May because this semester will end and I will get a chance to relax and get into a new routine. A routine that will keep me happy and balanced Link to comment
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