THE NO CONTACT CHALLENGE, Part 2

[BackToYou]

Day 5.

 

This is getting hard. I really miss her. I want to fix things but I don`t know how to do it this time. She has not tried to contact me after break up. My only hope now is NC. I can`t do anything else but wait her to call me.

[Helpmetoheal]

Thanks Janeiac, not planning on making this a lifestyle thats for sure! I feel a little better, ventured out yesterday for a few. Slowly but surely, steady on!

simplyme, this guy is making you sad. You don't wnat or need that in your life. It's normal to feel a sense of loss, but it's about your hopes and the attachment you formed, not him. It's all about you. Take care of YOU. YOU CAN DO IT!

 

helmetoheal, if you don't feel like going out for a little while, then don't. It's fine. Do whatever feels right for yourself, but don't let it become a permanat lifestyle and don't brood about "what if." Practice putting the ex out of your mind. Read a book, watch a movie. Surf the net. BUT DO NOT BROOD. You can do it too!

[eks79]

Day 1

 

It has now been 24 hrs since I spoke to him. This is the longest we have ever not talked. I miss him! I'm not sure how i'm going to pick up the pieces of my life and do this NC thing when i love him so much, but i'm willing to try anything!! I do have children involved but they are not his but he has taken on the father role since we have been together and their father is not in their lives. I'm not sure if i should let him to continue to have that role or not. Until i decide I don't think that I will stop the contact between him or the kids. I just don't think that is right.

 

I'm a mess, I find myself crying and don't even know that i'm doing it. I haven't really eaten and sleep..... nope thats not going to happen. I don't think that i'm strong enough to do NC, I'm really scared that its just another thing i'm going to try and fail at!!

[Janeiac]

Stay strong, everyone. Take care of yourself!

We can do this!

[sentencedtoagony]

day 3, miserable as .

[sentencedtoagony]

every time my phone rings, i think it's her

[nutcase720532]

Day 2: Well today went really good actually, I went to school, I was happy I smiled and laughed at things, I did think about him and sometimes thought he was hooking up with other people and flirting with other people but It only hurt alittle. Before I would start to cry and go for hours just being lazy but now I think about it and its like Ehh I will heal and I will get better. Ive havent cried today, I probably will later on? But a good cry tho, Crying is good, let my emotions out.

A Good Cry A Day Keeps The Contact Away =)

[simplyme01]

Day 2: Well today went really good actually, I went to school, I was happy I smiled and laughed at things, I did think about him and sometimes thought he was hooking up with other people and flirting with other people but It only hurt alittle. Before I would start to cry and go for hours just being lazy but now I think about it and its like Ehh I will heal and I will get better. Ive havent cried today, I probably will later on? But a good cry tho, Crying is good, let my emotions out.

A Good Cry A Day Keeps The Contact Away =)

 

I agree about crying & letting your feelings out. I would cry constantly. Now it's just here & there, a few times a week. Mostly on weekends. But letting yourself cry & really feel the pain will help you to heal. When my breakup 1st happened & everyone was saying it gets easier & couldn't even imagine. But it REALLY does. And NC is the best, best thing!

[boomroasted]

Day 1- Didn't bring phone to work. Not that bad. Thoughts are a little less muddled and questioning, more acceptant. Onto Day 2.

[nutcase720532]

every time my phone rings, i think it's her

 

My phone goes off alot, and every time it goes off I think its a text from him.... but its not, their always emails from things im subscribed to..

[Gemo112]

It ended on good terms. The most i've managed since we broke up is 3 weeks til i cracked. I haven't spoken to her in about a week so i'll try and summerize.

 

Day 1-6

 

We spoke as friends for a bit last week ended up talking about my mate splitting with her ex. The first few days where fine I felt good and wasn't thinking about her that much. Went to my brothers for the weekend and chilled out she only crossed my mind in the evenings when I was alone.

 

Day 7

 

Stupidly went on her facebook page as I thought I could handle it now - she had 2 very confusing facebook updates which I dont know if they where directed at me or not. Best to just ignore them. Wouldn't want her thinking im stalking her facebook page anyway. Hidden her and her mates updates from my feed - won't be making the same mistake again.

 

Day 8

 

I now have a really bad urge to contact her again, part of me thinks what we spoke about last was a bad note to finish on. Don't want that to be her last thought of me. I'm guessing I should just not care. I have an assignment to write for friday to keep me busy so i'll just focus on that for now. I wish she would just talk to me it would be alot easier if I knew we could just be mates.

[Janeiac]

Give it time, Gemo. The breakup is still pretty fresh and raw. NC helps you to heal.

[Pisces Girl]

Day 1: I'm doing okay. I didn't check his facebook at all which is a first. I'm proud of myself. My mom and I went to a massage and that helped take my mind off of things. I'm trying to stay positive. Only 29 more days!

[lucky999]

I love your idea, superDave71, problem is i have gone a month with no contact, and then i will get an incredible strong urge too hard to control and i do something like look at a photo or his facebook page, or want to contact by phone to get some sort of vindication, due to the fact, that the break up was traumatic for me in the way it went down.

[LapointeP]

I took him off facebook and I am actually okay for now. Day 1: I can do this!

[apple89]

lucky99, i went through the exact same thing,every time i would think that i would promise myself to never contact him again... however one day i started thinkgn about everythng that happened in that one month with NC... i did soo much, focused on jsut me, went out on dates, had fun, .. i felt like i truly did heal, i no longer was clingy and emotional, i was back to my own fabulous self, i took control of myself, so then i decided that now that im emotionally and mentally ready im to text him... i was sooo scared of his reaction (last time we talked he said horrible things).. but it turned out all for good, he apolozied, and talked to me like he used to, we didnt talk about us.. just friends.. it felt awesome... im now about to go home (i go to school in another city) and he asked me to see each other (im soo nervous i feel butterflyes again )... i did move on, but i didnt stop loving him, i knew that for our relationship to ever have a chance we had to work on each other... now well see, baby steps you know.... what im trying to say here is, only contact him if ur truly healed,and your are no longer that emotional burden that you were when he broke up with u, talk to him if you truly feel like you regained control of yourself.. bc its a 50 50 he might be willing ad open to talk to you, or he might still be a jerk.. however if you truly are healed, you will be ready for whatever reaction your ex has... rememeber NC is for healing for our OWN good, not to gain them back

[Gemo112]

Day 9

 

Had a dream that was really not needed - mad me think how much i missed just hanging out with her. We we're working together again like we did over the summer, the ended up at her house, then ended up making out and ended up naked with each other fooling around. There was a point in the dream where she asked me if I wanted to come out to dinner with her mum and her and I said no despite desperately wanting to say yes. It was in fear of being used as we were'nt going out in the dream it was more like reconnecting. Not sure what that could mean but maybe it's a step forward.

[nutcase720532]

(YESTERDAY) Day3: It went good, I worked, I thought lil about it but it doesnt bother me any more how it used to. I felt really good that day, I went out with someone I meet online and we just hung out and hes a cool guy I like him, as a friend. Other then that I went back home nervous because the next day I was getting all my wisdom teeth pulled out.

 

Day 4: I woke up and went to the oral surgeon and got my wisdom teeth pulled! OUCH! I havent been thinking about him all today, ive been on heavy dose pain killers and in bed, only time ive thought about it was right now actually since im typing things. I hope that he would text me today and ask how im doing, he knows I had them pulled out today so im hopping he would care alittle and see how I am. Ill just tell him im okay n thats it. I just want to know that he cares lil. Other then that im doing really good, I do have to do ALOT of homework. =(

[Moonchill]

Your story sounds very familiar nutcase, toothpain makes you forget the pain in your heart doesn't it

 

I'm still staying NC.

Since I let the hope go of getting back together I feel much better!

I hope I'm not only speaking for myself but for you guys too when I say;

It does get a lot easier after 2 months.

 

Today was such a good day.

I bumped into my high school crush. That made my heart beat faster for sure.

The sun was shining.. I made quite a walk on the beach on my own. My focus right now is losing weight. So I have plans to go jogging with a friend.

 

I don't have any urge anymore to contact him. It's like I'm no longer addicted! This forum is like a rehab centre

Right now ( and I hope it stays this way ) I feel strong. Maybe because finally the sun is shining again and that makes me extra optimistic. Although I do have my regrets and I can't stop missing him, it's not that overwelming anymore.

[simplyme01]

NC Day 17...BU, last time I saw him, day 54

 

Although it has gotten easier, it still hurts, I still miss him & feel so alone at times. Sometimes there is a strong urge to contact him. Moonchill, how did you let the hope of getting back together go?? I am still hanging on to "in time he will miss me & contact me". A part of me feels we really are over, then there's a part of me that is still holding that hope that he will contact me & miss me?? It's so crazy. I don't want to hang on to that anymore. I really want to let go & move on. I don't know how to get rid of that last bit of hope??

[Pisces Girl]

Day 2: Today my mom took me out to the movies, out shopping, and to dinner. Keeping busy has definitely helped me from sulking in my room all day. I still think about him a lot though and I'm wondering if he's thinking of me. I still haven't looked at his facebook. I also decided to stop checking up on my other exes facebooks. I didn't even realize I was still checking up on guys from awhile ago, guess I just did it out of habit. I really have a lot of letting go to do =/

[nutcase720532]

Day 2: Today my mom took me out to the movies, out shopping, and to dinner. Keeping busy has definitely helped me from sulking in my room all day. I still think about him a lot though and I'm wondering if he's thinking of me. I still haven't looked at his facebook. I also decided to stop checking up on my other exes facebooks. I didn't even realize I was still checking up on guys from awhile ago, guess I just did it out of habit. I really have a lot of letting go to do =/

 

I used to always look at his facebook =( Even tho he deleted me, his pics where public so i checked them alot... I still have pics of us up on mine, and do I plan on deleteing them? No... My hope is dying every day but even if it dies I still have memories of the good days, I dont regret my past.

Well, for those who didnt read my other post and is reading this one, I got all my wisdom teeth pulled today and I had HIGH hops for him texting me to feel better or what not.. but he didnt.. I keep telling myself he probably just doesnt remember I got them pulled but..... what if he knows and hes just doesnt want to talk to me. It hurts but what can I do... NC is the way to go, I should not get my hopes up any more, it just makes me feel worse, I should just live my life and if something happends it happends.

[Pisces Girl]

I'm very sorry about what you're going through, I know it can be tough. It's harder when you're in physical pain and you just want to know that they at least care about that. Sometimes you just have to not let it upset you too much and think of the people that do care about you. And at least wisdom teeth removal isn't a serious surgery- I had mine done a few years ago. It's not too bad, I'm sure you'll get through it just fine.

 

But your situation kind of sounds a lot like this guy I had a thing with over the summer. We had been best friends for 3 years and we came really close to being in a relationship because we had always liked each other. Well, I had foot surgery done and they had to put screws in; recovering from that surgery was the worst pain I've ever felt. This guy promised he would visit me to see if I was okay but never showed up. He started texting me less and less every day until he finally flipped out on me and told me to go away. He deleted me off facebook and it was like we never had a connection and were never even friends. And this guy mentioned he could see himself marrying me? HA! What a joke. We still haven't talked in 6 months and it's a good thing because I realized he was not good for my life as he was involved with drugs and had a lot of emotional issues. I've gotten over him, but now I'm working on getting over a guy that just recently broke up with me. This relationship stuff is so tiring

[Gemo112]

Day 10

 

No weird dreams last night which is good. Focusing on finishing off my assingment today. Shes still at the back of my mind which is really distracting - I keep wondering if she actually misses me or not. Going out tonight for my mates 21st i'm not a drunk dialer so I wont be doing anything stupid just having a laugh and enjoying myself. I want to get back into going to the gym as that helped me take my mind off it before but with all my uni work I find it hard to make time and i'm running out of money!

[simplyme01]

Day 18...this is suppose to get easier. It seems the urge to contact him is getting stronger. I don't understand this. I mis him so much, seems like more everyday. I feel like I'm doing all the right things. I don't want to miss him anymore.