pace of ace Posted April 30, 2009 Share Posted April 30, 2009 Well done you You are the inspiration I need right now. It's not easy jelly but if the 30 days has taught me nothing else, it's that i can do what i need to do when i need to do it, for the benefit of myself. be strong. Link to comment
wanttobehappy Posted April 30, 2009 Share Posted April 30, 2009 Day 7 - after closure Doing really good! Thank you to this forum and everyone here. Reading about it, talking about it, writing about it, all make the healing faster than trying to bury it down. One other thing that also help is, it was announced that our jobs are going by November. The certainty about being jobless really helpful in moving on! Link to comment
Ixtapa Posted April 30, 2009 Share Posted April 30, 2009 Nothing really new. Keep wondering about him even though I know I should not. Pfffff. This is getting really annoying.... Link to comment
FigureItOut Posted April 30, 2009 Share Posted April 30, 2009 Had a really rough night last night.... but i'm trucking along OKAY today. A friend from college is coming to visit this weekend, so I am excited for that. Link to comment
LostSolace Posted April 30, 2009 Share Posted April 30, 2009 Day seven...after today it will be officially one week since I initiated NC. I just get this feeling that she isn't thinking about me at all..and if she is, it's probably in spite. Three months on and the spite was still there.. Christ.. I miss her. I'm finding it really tough.. Link to comment
coldheart Posted April 30, 2009 Share Posted April 30, 2009 I did it! I contacted her. I know I know... I deserve the proverbial slap on the wrist!!! I e-mailed her with a "hey how are you" and she responded immediately with a "OMG you’re alive!!!! I know that you are grown and all but I have been so damn worried about you =( I am ok" I left it alone for a while and then got two more e-mails: "Another thing…. I totally respect that you have moved on I truly do respect that I just miss, truly miss my best friend and I don’t want to move forward without you as my friend… stupid I know but it’s the truth and that is coming right from my heart. If you don’t want that I will respect that as well and move forward too just let me know so that I can just completely let you go. I must reach out and tell this to you." Then this... "Is there a reason why you emailed me? Or did you just email me to be nice because I’ve been trying to reach you?" I just answered that I wanted to see that she was okay and let her know I was okay as well. She had been constantly trying to reach me after all. I think I will initiate NC again after this... Link to comment
waveseer Posted April 30, 2009 Share Posted April 30, 2009 It sounds like that was a completely positive interaction, so why the sad face? Link to comment
coldheart Posted April 30, 2009 Share Posted April 30, 2009 It sounds like that was a completely positive interaction, so why the sad face? You really think so? Thanks for the enlightenment man. UPDATE: I replied with: "Just wanted to know you were okay and let you know that I am okay. That’s all." She responded with: "Well just so you know NO I am not ok. But happy to know that yes you are ok. I wish you would open up and stop being so hard…." I am going to put some serious thought into what I am going to reply to this with... Link to comment
waveseer Posted April 30, 2009 Share Posted April 30, 2009 UPDATE: I replied with: "Just wanted to know you were okay and let you know that I am okay. That’s all." She responded with: "Well just so you know NO I am not ok. But happy to know that yes you are ok. I wish you would open up and stop being so hard…." I am going to put some serious thought into what I am going to reply to this with... I understand better now. What do you want? Link to comment
coldheart Posted April 30, 2009 Share Posted April 30, 2009 I want to test the waters and see if another "go at it" is possible. If not then we are really done I guess. But I will refuse to remain friends with her. It would be too hard. Link to comment
waveseer Posted April 30, 2009 Share Posted April 30, 2009 I want to test the waters and see if another "go at it" is possible. If not then we are really done I guess. But I will refuse to remain friends with her. It would be too hard. Then the voice of experience and wisdom says to let her know this exactly and then see if she's up for it. In my opinion it's a little soon, but I am not in your shoes. Link to comment
coldheart Posted April 30, 2009 Share Posted April 30, 2009 Then the voice of experience and wisdom says to let her know this exactly and then see if she's up for it. In my opinion it's a little soon, but I am not in your shoes. We've experienced mini-breakups in the past, but nothing ever like this. This is the longest we've ever gone and it seems as if she is determined to move on this time. However her approach is strange since she seems to not want to let go of me. Link to comment
waveseer Posted April 30, 2009 Share Posted April 30, 2009 We've experienced mini-breakups in the past, but nothing ever like this. This is the longest we've ever gone and it seems as if she is determined to move on this time. However her approach is strange since she seems to not want to let go of me. Are your conflicts surmountable? Do you think both of you are ready and willing to compromise? Link to comment
pdoog Posted April 30, 2009 Share Posted April 30, 2009 day 28 I believe. had a terrible dream lastngiht. In my dream we ran into each other and she jumped in my arms saying "I missed you so much" Still NO contact and wont. Link to comment
LostSolace Posted April 30, 2009 Share Posted April 30, 2009 pdoog - My sympathies, man. I've had those dreams..though lately I've been so worn out from work that I tend to dream about what's happened at work..and not have her cross my mind. She still manages it though, sometimes..When I least suspect it.. And it always tends to involve her saying "Don't worry..this time it's real..it's not a dream. I'm here." And then I wake up..Typical. Link to comment
coldheart Posted April 30, 2009 Share Posted April 30, 2009 Are your conflicts surmountable? Do you think both of you are ready and willing to compromise? Well, we need to talk and work that out. I replied with a simple "I'm trying" and just got this reply: "(My name), it’s me….. (Her name)….. first and foremost your friend. I am trying too but I am scared you are going to reject me and what I have to say. GOD I miss you more then I can explain. =( I need but most importantly want to see you" I am thinking this is the type of response I am looking for? Link to comment
waveseer Posted April 30, 2009 Share Posted April 30, 2009 Well, we need to talk and work that out. I replied with a simple "I'm trying" and just got this reply: "(My name), it’s me….. (Her name)….. first and foremost your friend. I am trying too but I am scared you are going to reject me and what I have to say. GOD I miss you more then I can explain. =( I need but most importantly want to see you" I am thinking this is the type of response I am looking for? I don't know, only you know. Why not meet and talk? Link to comment
coldheart Posted April 30, 2009 Share Posted April 30, 2009 I don't know, only you know. Why not meet and talk? I think I am going to do this. Hopefully I'll be posting in the "getting back together" forum very soon. Link to comment
waveseer Posted April 30, 2009 Share Posted April 30, 2009 I think I am going to do this. Hopefully I'll be posting in the "getting back together" forum very soon. This is the getting back together forum. Link to comment
coldheart Posted April 30, 2009 Share Posted April 30, 2009 This is the getting back together forum. Well in more specific terms, creating my own thread about my success story Link to comment
LostSolace Posted April 30, 2009 Share Posted April 30, 2009 Well in more specific terms, creating my own thread about my success story Best of luck, Coldheart! It's all about living the dream.. Let's hope yours comes true. Link to comment
LemonCheesecak Posted April 30, 2009 Share Posted April 30, 2009 Day 27 Oooh I can almost smell it. And it smells of sweetest honeysuckle. Can't stop me now Link to comment
waveseer Posted April 30, 2009 Share Posted April 30, 2009 Day whatever plus 2, let's just say I'll be using my handy private journal today. Link to comment
FriendnorFoe Posted April 30, 2009 Share Posted April 30, 2009 This new job I have is really helping take my mind off my ex, especilly if its 8-10 hours a day. I find that your concentration is so important you dont really think of anything else while your working, which is good. Still before I go to bed and when I wake up she is on my mind. Link to comment
LemonCheesecak Posted April 30, 2009 Share Posted April 30, 2009 This new job I have is really helping take my mind off my ex, especilly if its 8-10 hours a day. I find that your concentration is so important you dont really think of anything else while your working, which is good. Still before I go to bed and when I wake up she is on my mind. Do you read much before bed? I tried doing that back when I was still thinking about her at those times and it helped a bit. Link to comment
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