sckoobs

Jebus! get over it! everyone! now!

Maybe you just need to lay the cards on the table, tell him you are interested, despite the fact you invited him over for dinner, then see what he does. Relationships are a two way thing, no one should have to chase more than the other. Maybe because your dinner was 'non-romantic' he sees you as a friend? If you actually told him it was non-romantic he has probably taken this to mean that you're only interested in him as a friend, that might be why he opened up so much as well, because he felt more comfortable?

Some guys have this habbit where they gawk at other girls when they are on a date or generally with their girlfriend, naturally this can upset said girlfriend. I'm quite easily contented, so I don't 'stare' at women, also because I think its rude. Maybe that is why I haven't had many girlfriends - a subtle glance every now and then tells them you're interested, yadda, yadda... Anyway, just as a topic of conversation; is a (boy's or girl's) lingering eye in a relationship a good thing?

Princess777: you kind of missed my point, but no matter, its out of my system now.

The whole 'nice guy' argument is a real pile of. I reckon it comes from society's ideas of how men and women should act, personally I'm turned off by the woman who wants to look like the 'in' actress or supermodel - where is the individuality in that? Is there not such a thing as a relationship based on equality? Biologically speaking we have animal instincts to satisfy, thats fine, but; quote: 'We only want the strongest to make strong offspring, it's a survival thing' - we all want a healthy partner - for sure, but if we went to extremes of finding the 'strongest' and were that driven by our animal instincts, all girls would be chasing 30 year old male athletes and all guys would be chasing full-bodied, wide-hipped women i.e: natural child-bearers, slim girls; the social norm today, wouldn't even get a look in, so how can you say at our level of evolution and by the society that we have nurtured that we are so dependant on cave-man ethics? Women want men who are stronger than them??? Does being a nice guy mean you are physically or mentally/emotionally weak!? I completely agree with dasbin; 'What happened to just being who you are?', the fact that you follow trends in society in an attempt to fit in is brainless, if you have no individuality you are just a headless chicken. Subscribing to stereotypical fascinations is delusional, life is not so black and white, how can you go through life lying to yourself so much!? Personally, what I look for in a woman is a quality that I also posess, someone who has enough confidence in themself to, basically not care what anyone else thinks. I am who I am for me and no one else, I will not adapt to societies norms because; sure I might be a 'bad boy' and 'score more chicks' or whatever, but I'd still have to answer to my conscience. I do what I feel is right, I respect others feelings and needs, I do to others as I would have them do to me - if that warrants me the label 'nice guy' then what the f**k do I care? I feel very passionately about this, because in my opinion I was pretty much a social recluse throughout my school days, but I have no regrets because I am happy with who I am today. I change for nobody except me; THATS survival.

You should start dating as well, not to make you ex feel jealous but to make you feel better. There *are* a lot more guys out there - when you are dating someone who you find interesting you will forget about your ex almost overnight. It's sad, but he is obviously over you so you have to get over him, you may love him but unreciprocated love just hurts, it's bad for both of you. Take up a new hobby or something to help you meet new people.

Personally, I only ask when I'm interested in her, if I wanted a girl as a friend only then it would not matter if she had a b/f. Its sometimes difficult enough to ask a girl if they have got a b/f because of the obvious implication.

This might sound odd, but try masturbating before sex. Depending on how aggressively you do it your penis will feel a bit more numb, hence there will not be as much feeling - which is not to say it won't feel good when having sex. Its also from the fact that after you cum, its much harder for a guy to cum again within a short period of time, meaning you will last quite a bit longer. If you have never masturbated before then perhaps you should try it for the sake of your relationship - even though it shouldn't matter because your stamina will increase the more you have sex anyway, you should tell your girlfriend that you need to practise to get better! Also try bringing her up to speed, if you both orgasm at the same time you will both feel great - like you have a connection - try giving her oral sex or try more foreplay. Depending on the girl, stimulation of the nipples alone can get her off.

Just talk about events in your life that he would not know of. Make it sound exciting but be honest - don't make something up. If you can't think of anything then get out and do something that is exciting! Its will help you take your mind off things... when I need time out I go snowboarding, all the fresh air and fast velocities can really clear my head. When I leave I am refreshed and thinking clearly... it also reminds me how fun life can be. As for the msn messenger thing, just don't log in. If you have to, to talk to other friends on line or something then set your status to offline or hidden or something... I'm sure that option exists. Blocking seems like an extreme measure to me, it kind of suggests that you want nothing to do with him. You could even log in and just not chat to him until he initiates something, if you find that you are short on options.

I say take a step back for a while and let her do the chasing. If she is genuinely interested in you then she will get in touch. I can't think of any better advice to apply to your situation, if you continue to make the moves then she will know that she has you under her thumb - don't play the fool because you'll only get hurt.

If he has a new girlfriend then don't contact him again, it will only make you feel worse when he doesn't reply or replies with an emotionally empty message. I hate relationship mind games like the no cantact rule, it should be obvious when someone is not interested in you any more. I wish I could be of more help but I'm inexperienced in this sort of thing.

Personally, I try not to plan things like asking out a girl, it makes me nervous... I would just do it when there is an oportunity, if none arise then make one arise - tell her that you would like to speak to her in private or something. Don't ponder - just go for it!

Well, its a lot of money but if you trust them all then pay the whole bill with your AMEX card and tell them that they can pay you back. It sounds really risky - I know! Would it really be such a hassle to goto an ATM? Afterall, they are pretty much all over the place. I'm of the same opinion as you that its kind of crap that someone gives you that look, it makes you feel bad and you aren't even doing anything wrong. I don't know what the situation is, like if you all order something different but split the total cost equally, then I would just pay the equal amount... hmmm... I wouldn't worry about it too much - its their problem, and anyway - if they are friends then shouldn't they understand!?

I won't pretend to fully understand what you are going through but I can tell it must be a very stressful time. I love my mother - without her I would not be where I am today, so I can understand from that perspective, what it must be like to loose her. I've never had a partner, at least not one worth mentioning, but I would follow kuhl282000's advice regarding sending her a letter or something. I think she has said in no uncertian terms that she doesn't want to be with you like that, so tell her that you understand that its over. Don't be reminisent, because that will cloud her's and your judgement, from the sounds of it, what your relationship needs is closure. Remember; what doesn't kill you makes you stronger - you are gonna be one hell of a strong person after this. In the mean time, mourn for your mother and then start rebuilding yourself.

Whew... that actually comes as a relief, I just wasn't sure what women expect and I didn't want her to think I wasn't interested just because I didn't kiss her. Anyway thanks for the advice!