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You're story sounds very similar to something i went through. For months and months me and this guy were seeing each other but he always made up excuses why we couldn't be serious. At first i also saw it as a bit of fun, but over the months I grew very attacthed to him, and although i was getting hurt because he was only seeing me for the sex, it was as if i was addicted to him at the same time, because towards the end he was telling me that he was falling for me too and that he did want us to be more serious. I was extatic. In a way i grant myself lucky that in a blazing argument he did something unforgiveable, otherwise i think i would still be attatched to him, even though he was having his cake and eating it. I think you just need to concertrate on the fact that this woman is unlikely to change her mind in this situation and keep reminding yourself of that, instead of quitting your job. Don't let her ruin your life. I do understand how it feels to be thinking about someone soooo much when they don't feel the same, but don't take it personally. In my experience i have found that ppl who are just after fun and mess you around, have issues that they need to sort out for themselves. The guy I was talking about had low self - esteem and was very destructive - he didn't love himself - so there was no way he could love me.

I believe there's lust at first sight, not love at first sight. Love can only happen when you really know the person, i feel.

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I think you just need to give it a little more time, see what happens, but don't put all your hopes into it. It might be too early to have a discussion about where the relationship is going, because this may scare him off, but does he know that you want something serious? Also, men nearly always pull away for a period of time when they get too close to a woman, because by showing alot of emotion, they feel as if they are losing themselves, losing control, so they need to pull away for a time to feel themselves again. But if this guy likes you, he will come back without you needing to chase him. I think in time your gut instinct will tell you this guys motives, but if you are still unsure, you will just have to ask him, not when he has gone quiet, but when he is willingly coming back to you, when he is more willing to share himself.

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It is true that we don't know each other that well, but when things are going good, we get on really well as if we are mates. I dunno, I just really like him, but I know he promised himself that he wouldn't get too involved with anyone whilst in this profession because things haven't worked in his previous relationships. He told me that he felt very guilty for getting close to me when he knew it couldn't go any further, yet there is a big part of him that wants things to happen. i think he is pulled between his head and his heart. Maybe whenever we get too close, his heart likes it, but his mind makes him feel really bad, so he tries to gain control over himself again by going quiet? His words and body language totally contradict each other. His words are like, "No I can't do this." But at the same time we start kissing as if really he wants me to persuade him to do more.

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Don't be too forward in letting him know at first - slowly give him clues. I'm in the same boat as you and i let my crush know too soon that i liked him and it scared him off for a while. I think slow, steady but definite is the way to go.

There's this guy at uni who i have known for a few months and we have flirted for months. i told him i liked him too soon after i just met him because we were both flirting hysterically to each other, but at the time it scared him off when i explained how much i liked him. at the time he said he saw me as just a friend but that whenever he fancies a girl he tries to hide it anyway. well, gradually over a couple of months we became closer as friends, but I always knew that he liked me more than a friend and when he came back from a three week holiday we really hit it off and chatted lots. We always seem to have that chemistry - you know, his face lights up when he sees me, he treats me differently to other girls, we hold long gazes, he's always asking if i fancy anyone and he is always helpful to me by lending money and offering lifts. I kissed him on the cheek when we were alone and he seemed to really like it and he invited me on a trip to London with him and the next day we went to the cinema with another of our friends. But then for some reason, as if we had got too close for him, he backed off again and he wanted to do things with me as long as there was atleast one other person with us. He is only 18 and i'm 20 and he has had no experience with girlfriends at all and he knows that i have split up from a 3 year relationship. I get the feeling that when we get too close he pulls away, but when i give him too much space, he starts acting like the joker to get my attention, or flirts with others and not me to make me jealous. He is not verbally expressing how he feels.

There's this guy a college who i have known for a few months and we have flirted for months. i told him i liked him too soon after i just met him because we were both flirting hysterically to each other, but at the time it scared him off when i explained how much i liked him. at the time he said he saw me as just a friend but that whenever he fancies a girl he tries to hide it anyway. well, gradually over a couple of months we became closer as friends, but I always knew that he liked me more than a friend and when he came back from a three week holiday we really hit it off and chatted lots. We always seem to have that chemistry - you know, his face lights up when he sees me, he treats me differently to other girls, we hold long gazes, he's always asking if i fancy anyone and he is always helpful to me by lending money and offering lifts. I kissed him on the cheek when we were alone and he seemed to really like it and he invited me on a trip to London with him and the next day we went to the cinema with another of our friends. But then for some reason, as if we had got too close for him, he backed off again and he wanted to do things with me as long as there was atleast one other person with us. He is only 18 and i'm 20 and he has had no experience with girlfriends at all and he knows that i have split up from a 3 year relationship. I get the feeling that when we get too close he pulls away, but when i give him too much space, he starts acting like the joker to get my attention, or flirts with others and not me to make me jealous. He is not verbally expressing how he feels.

The only people who would laugh at you are insensitive and have low self esteem themselves - they try to put others down to make themselves feel better. Ignore these kinds of people. Most people will be sympathising and empathizing with you when you are up there speaking - i think most people get very nervous doing public speaking. My hands used to shake, my voice used to shake, and my face would go bright red and what made it worse was that i knew this was visible, but the key is to try not to worry or think about it too much before you start. the day before you do another talk, only imagine it going well, imagine the feeling of success you will experience when you have finished. Do not think of things going wrong - just try and think positively. I agree that you should join a few clubs - i know it's scary meeting new people and doing new things, but in order to progress through life, people need to push themselves beyond their comfort zones. I've just started at college and I know how daunting it can be meeting and talking to new people, but if you show a genuine interest in others and ask them questions about themselves (people like talking about themselves) you will find people appreciating your understanding of them. Try to think up a few questions in advance that you could ask people about themselves - this will build you with more confidence. Try not to worry too much about your studies - yes they are important, but there are far more other important things in life. Live your life for now, this is not a dress rehearsal, try to live life without regret. I hope this has helped you. Good luck.

There's this guy at college and a few weeks ago he started REALLY flirting with me when it was me, him and one of our other friends around. He was acting childishly and joking around about sexual stuff alot and generally trying to make me laugh. when the other friend who was with us kept saying to "get a room" we just carried on joking around. He was being extremely suggestive and he was looking into my eyes alot. the next couple of days he was still really flirty but it had died down a little because all our other friends were around. Anyway, people were telling me that they thought he fancied me, and I started to really like him, so one lunch time i got him alone and he kept asking if i still liked this guy i used to be interested in. when i said "no" he flirtily asked, "So who do you like?" he seemed scared to listen to the answer and got up and went and asked to borrow something from his friend. Anyway, i told him i had something to tell him but that i didn't have the guts to say it, but i could tell he knew i was gunna tell him i liked him, he seemed quite pleased, but because i was scared i got up and left, and he shouted eagerly, "Say bye to me" with a smile. Well, the next time i saw him, his flirtations had gone quite cold, and he only said the odd thing to me - he never mentioned what i had said to him, and he acted as if i hadn't even mentioned anything about liking him. he started flirting with everyone else, but i could still see him looking at me and facing towards me. Sometimes i even caught him looking at me just after he'd said something very flirtatious to someone else, as if he wanted to see what my reaction was. It felt as if he was slipping away from me, so that night i text him to appologise for making him feel awkward by trying to tell him that i liked him ( i didn't want to make him feel awkward by saying it to his face.) He text back five seconds later and said that he would be more dirty again towards me, in a jokey manner. when i saw him again though, he was still very flirty with others and only occasionally with me, yet i still caught him looking into my eyes quite a bit. Most of my friends still thought he liked me, and without my permission, one of them asked him outright if he did like me. he told her that he saw me as a friend, but when she told me this, i thought that, to be honest he probably wouldn't admit his feelings towards me to one of my friends anyway. so i rang him that evening because i wanted him to tell me personally how he felt about me. I could tell he felt awkward and was reluctant to tell me, but when he did, he said he saw me as a friend and that nothing could happen between us. He then said that he had a lot of respect for me and that i was the only person who had ever rung him from his college friends. he said i had a lot of guts telling him that i liked him because whenever he fancies someone, he said he always tries to hide it (but why would he tell me that, when i had confessed how i felt about him?). I really think he likes or liked me and that i scared him off. He is only 17 (I'm 19), he has never had a girlfriend or kissed anyone and he knows that i have recently split up with my boyfirend of 3 years. i think i have scared him because he seems extremely shy about expressing his true emotions, he only seems to put on a funny act in front of everyone, but he seemed to open up a little about some things with me when we were on our own. Please let me know how you think he feels. I am very confused. I would really appreciate it. Thank you.

Relationships can be very complicated. Me and my ex-boyfriend used to want space every now and again. Sometimes it was because we saw each other too much and felt trapped, sometimes it was because we saw too little of each other (When he went to uni) and that confused us because we'd see other people around us flirting, pulling or in relationships and we needed to feel wanted there and then. these kind of feelings then make people feel guilty, and usually makes you wonder why you have feelings for other people. Maybe she misses the closeness you share when you are away from each other and this makes her see other people having fun with guys. Or maybe she wants alot of attention from you when she is depressed. Sometimes i couldn't express that i wanted more attention from my boyfriend - i didn't want to seem really clingy, so instead i would get upset in an attempt to get his aatention, but when he started to realise this and it didn't work any more, i used to just get angry. You should talk to her. Maybe she has mixture of all these feelings and they come out all at once when she finally gets to see you again, and her own emotions and reactions probably scare her and make her feel confused about things. Don't believe her when one minute she seems annoyed with you, then the next she is all happy and snuggly - she has just put the problems under the carpet because she wants instant relief. the problems will slowly build and then come out again later. the key to successful relationships is effective comunication.

There's this guy at college and at first we were just friends. I have only known him a couple of months, and a few weeks ago he started REALLY flirting with me when it was only me, him and one of our other friends around. He was acting childishly and joking around about sexual stuff alot and generally trying to make me laugh. when the other friend who was with us kept saying to "get a room" and just "get it on"(!) we just carried on joking around. He was being extremely suggestive and he was looking into my eyes whenever he did this. the next couple of days he was still really flirty but it had died down a little because all our other friends were around. Anyway, people were telling me that they thought he fancied me, and I started to really like him, so one lunch time i got him alone and he kept asking if i still liked this guy i used to be interested in. when i said "no" he flirtily asked, "So who do you like?" he seemed scared to listen to the answer and got up and went and asked to borrow something from his friend. Anyway, i told him i had something to tell him but that i didn't have the guts to say it, but i could tell he knew i was gunna tell him i liked him, he seemed quite pleased, but because i was scared i got up and left, and he shouted eagerly, "Say bye to me" with a smile. Well, the next time i saw him, his flirtations had gone quite cold, and he only said the odd thing to me - he never mentioned what i had said to him, and he acted as if i hadn't even mentioned anything about liking him. he started flirting with everyone else, but i could still see him looking at me and facing towards me. Sometimes i even caught him looking at me just after he'd said something very flirtatious to someone else, as if he wanted to see what my reaction was. It felt as if he was slipping away from me, so that night i text him to appologise for making him feel awkward by trying to tell him that i liked him ( i didn't want to make him feel awkward by saying it to his face.) He text back five seconds later and said that he would be more dirty again towards me, in a jokey manner. when i saw him again though, he was still very flirty with others and only occasionally with me, yet i still caught him looking into my eyes quite a bit. Most of my friends still thought he liked me, and without my permission, one of them asked him outright if he did like me. he told her that he saw me as a friend, but when she told me this, i thought that, to be honest he probably wouldn't admit his feelings towards me to one of my friends anyway. so i rang him that evening because i wanted him to tell me personally how he felt about me. I could tell he felt awkward and was reluctant to tell me, but when he did, he said he saw me as a friend and that nothing could happen between us. He then said that he had a lot of respect for me and that i was the only person who had ever rung him from his college friends. he said i had a lot of guts telling him that i liked him because whenever he fancies someone, he said he always tries to hide it (but why would he tell me that, when i had confessed how i felt about him?). I really think he likes or liked me and that i scared him off. He is only 17 (I'm 19), he has never had a girlfriend or kissed anyone and he knows that i have recently split up with my boyfirend of 3 years. i think i have scared him because he seems extremely shy about expressing his true emotions, he only seems to put on a funny act in front of everyone, but he seemed to open up a little about some things with me when we were on our own. Please let me know how you think he feels. I am very confused. I would really appreciate it. Thank you.