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mariab.

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Everything posted by mariab.

  1. Kate, i'm sorry that you even have to be in contact w/ him. My ex also said that he wants to be free. Well, they can both be as free as they want, we'll see how far they fly..I also don't want to be friends w/ him, he acted like a complete jerk (you know) Is there anyway a friend can handle the financial stuff for you? cheers
  2. Boston, so happy you are feeling better. Today I developed a mantra that whenever I think about my ex I chant" I release you to your higher purpose, I've set you free and I am free" hope it lasts. I guess for me its hard b/c he was such a jerkoff the last time we talked-he didn't need to be that way. I will never understand why he had to say those things to me. I really actually do not want him back right now, the company that hes keeping is not the company I would keep, and what hes doing w/ his life is not what I am doing w/ my life. Well, hope this week gets better. Happy thoughts to everyone.
  3. day 21-this week has been kinda rough- I guess realizing maybe we wont ever get back together (and after our last conversation why would I?). I hear stop thinking about the ex but its so hard not to. I've lost alot of weight and my doctor says anymore and I go to hospital, but its hard to eat. I used to exercise like crazy but now all I do is lie in bed, go to work, and started smoking fags again. Sigh..I was doing so well last week, what happened?
  4. The saga of the mail continues..I tried to change my ex's address for him but needed his signature. Tried to do it online but had to pay w/ a cc w/ a billing address to the new address. I am thinking of mailing him a change of address form w/ a sticky saying "change your address" but don't know whether I am breaking no contact, I just don't really want to have anything to do with him or contact him for a long, long time. He has not emailed once just to check up on me only for the status of his checks and although it hurts it makes me think what kind of person he is. I am finally at the stage were I realize we are probably never going to get back together again and although it hurts ther's also a weight off my shoulders, so I just don't know what to do about the mail- I was told I could just throw it in trash but its illegal and petty. any suggestions??
  5. day 20 for me. It got harder this week I don't know why. His mail still comes to my house, i tried to get it changed at the post office but I need signature. It also hurts that he hasnt tried to see how I'm doing, I understand he might not want to give me the wrong impression but really, we broke up! what other way to say we are over ( I guess he did say don't wait for that call) It makes me doubt that I meant that much to him. I think that everytime I am starting to think about him I'm going to chant"out of sight out of mind, do not think about him" and hopefully train myself to just stop thinking about him..If I send him a letter w/ the change of address fornm in it and a sticky saying p "change your adress" will that be too much?
  6. what happens when they don't call? My ex has only emailed about his checks never to see whether I am ok...it hurts...
  7. Don't text him.. you are doing so well!! Wait and see whether he texts you back. Sorry about the wedding, I know you have been thinking about calling the sis for a long time, and I am glad you called. That was a really strong move you made. Keep it up sister, let the strength shine through!
  8. Parsley, you really keep our spirits up! keep it up!
  9. Boston23, you are doing all right girl!! Have you seen an acupuncturist yet? Day 19 for me, had to deal w/ all his mail still coming to the house...threw away all his stuff. Cleansing. Its hard..I think about him some days all the time and I think how sad for him, he lost the best. Oh well, life goes on I guess. Hard bitter pill to swallow but we all take our vitamins right? Anyway, I have not heard from him except emails about his unemployement checks so I guess thats good!
  10. thanks honeypumpkin, I've slept well on my decision except today I ded dream about him going to Japan w/ a girl! weird...I hate it when I dream about him.
  11. so readers on this forum know how badly my ex treated me our last time together-they also know his mail still comes to my house and he left some good stuff of his here too. Well, I thought alot of what to do w/ his mail, and to not be petty or malicious. I decided the best thing was to send it all back, since I've sent him his mail before, 2x, he had plenty of time to change his address. I also took all his stuff and donated it to goodwill, except for a camera which I gave to a friend of mine to use in Europe. The way I see it, its been a month and he has not picked up his stuff yet so its not important to him-it can also be that he thinks he can just hold on to me- that is have me still do things for him, since its ok for him to move on but not me. Wrong!! Once its over its over and he had ample time to step up and be a man and hasn't yet...Still have not received his unemployement check yet, which is the one that I am still debating whether to mail to him still or state. Comments, rants, or suggestions?
  12. So today in the mail I get his credit card statement, bank statement AND phone bill!!!For crying out loud, what is going on here-the unemployement check I can return but everything else? Can I write not at this address? return to sender? for real, what is going on in his head? what a jerk...
  13. To tell you the honest truth-too much trouble!! He acted in a way that night to hurt me? get me over him? whatever..but the things he said will always live w/ me, including how he still treated the house as our house (we lived together) when he came over. NO NO NO I need to find the perfect way to let him know that he cannot use me anymore, I will not allow it. I am leaning on sending the check back to the state w/ big NOT AT THIS ADDRESS letters on it but really I am a nice person and I think its the last check..
  14. camera, tons of pictures he took that he thought were "good", shirts, parts for his bike..
  15. oh and another thing-he still has some of his stuff at my house. He has had plenty of oppurtunities to get them-when will it be a good time time to trash them? I dont want to be a jerk but I am DONE w/ all this crap!
  16. So my ex was a total jerk to me when we had our last talk, telling me how he was free!free! to sleep w/ other women, how he didn't love me, showing me pics of his "women" on myspace (I hate myspace)A whole bunch of things including when I said call me if u miss me or want to date-he says "Don't wait for that call"Jerk!! Anyway, he still gets his unemployment checks to my house. the 1st was fine, I sent it out..thought it was the last one..well, the day after v-day he emails me about his "new" check that should be coming and could I send it to him- oh and hope all is well...Well, I would like to tear up the check and mail it to him b/c he has the nerve to think that here I am he can just use? me like that. I guess he hasn't understood that I am gone- its over I would NEVER NEVER even think about being w/ him again after all the things he said to me that last time(granted I let him but we have all been there just taking any crumbs they throw our way) Anyway, I would like to eamil him back and tell him that I sent the check back to the sender, since I am not his mom, g-friend, or even friend (why would I want to after the way he treated me) that he needs to start depending on himself and not other people. My dilemma is whether I should even write back at all..2 weeks no contact.. what would u guys do?
  17. bump. Super Dave really know what he's talking about, people should really listen to him and follow his advice...
  18. 14 days no contact. went out w/ my friends yesterday and had a great time..still thinking about him tho' but now am starting to realize all the things HE did wrong.
  19. day 10 and also tomorrow is a month to our break up. he emailed me yesterday about his unemployment check that is coming. i dont feel like spending the money on mailing it.its hard all i want to do is see him
  20. Day 9 for me but it's almost a month since we broke up . Its really hard b/c you miss them so much but you just keep going, I guess. I know its supposed to hurt less but when?
  21. I don't have to go to some expensive restaurant where I won't like the food, dress up in some dress , and drive there and back, since he didn't have a license!
  22. well, today is a hard day for me, I really don't know why! I guess the term "rollercoaster ride" is apt but you still can't shut off the feelings. I don't feel that guilty anymore or upset w/ myself over the relationship. I just feel betrayed and rejected by my ex and that's been hard to let go, especially today. I remember last Valentines where he got me reservations at a really nice restaurant and I was too lazy to find a babysitter for my kid.. He was soo excited that he had gotten this reservation and we ended up eating at some crappy joint w/ my kid b/c I just didn't want to go out and dress up! BTW, the reservations where for 9 pm and my kid would've been in bed by then and my friend had even volunteered to come over! Its not use beating yourself up over it and I know that. I guess I am posting to get it off my chest. I miss him, especially at night and when I wake up but its easier now..It really feels like a day takes a year lately. Any advice?
  23. celene, I know its hard but just don't look at his page. Have a goal that you won't look at it for 1 day, then if you go through one day, go to 2 days etc.. I was looking at my exes page everyday and just making mysef unhappy (and I was dumped in the worst possible way.."I am not in love, with you anymore-you pushed me away too much..I want to date other women" blah blah blah) Look, just take it one day at a time. Just b/c you think he's all that doesnt mean other people do! and keep posting here, I get alot of help from people more than my therapist!! have you tried yoga?
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