DarkCh0c0

If you find yourself asking that question, then the answer is no. Because when a relationship is healthy and your partner cares, you don't doubt it. You just know it. Anything else is a no.

When you date, what you see is what your get. You can't go in wishing he would change. It doesn't work this way. He's shown you who he is. What you got is the best version of him. If you are fully happy with that, then of course stay. Just know that he doesn't sound like a catch nor supportive to you and your kids. This is something you'll have to live with for many years to come.

Yep. Block him everywhere and tell your friends you don't want to hear about him. He's stringing you along. He's not serious about you and won't include you in important events. That is your clue to out. He says he "loves" you, but his actions say the truth which is he's not really in love with you. Honey at your age, you need to stop wasting time on him. And next time, don't ask a man to show commitment/love to you. It's like telling an adult not to steal. Your don't do that cause everyone just knows it. So when a man doesn't follow his actions, take the hint and cut him loose. Time to meet new men who are local, available and who want the same things! Have fun on NYE 💅

And And And And What more do you need to know? These are all red flags and they are NOT normal in a healthy relationship. You don't need to be physically abused for you to know you're with the wrong match. He's not a good nor healthy partner to you. He's also not a healthy father material. Most women would run when they realize these flags. It's up to you to choose whether you want to settle for someone toxic and subtly abusive, or if you wish to leave and give yourself and your child a better life with a healthier partner. You can still walk away more easily now as you're not married yet.

I'm sorry you're going through this. So without putting a label on it, he's not able to be good partner to you. He's not partner material. He love bombed you so you get attached to him and then afterwards you started feeling conflicted and inadequate. His family will be by his side, so no need to get their opinion on this. Yes, but by staying with him, you show him that you are OKAY with it and willing to put up with his trash act. And your feelings are valid. He doesn't sound like a catch at all to be honest. He's not partner material and you know about this from the beginning. Who you see today is the best version of him. Are you willing regardless to stay with that?

And why don't you do the move? A lot of serious women prefer the man to initiate some moves. If she invited you over, then it means she wanted you but you have to be courageous and initiate intimacy yourself. Next time you meet, initiate the kissing yourself. It's not too late if you are still chatting. Then as you know her on more dates, build up naturally to the sexual intimacy.

Annnd that's why you don't date someone who has just been out of a relationship, specially an abusive one. She has a lot of baggage to go through and process. She needs to be single and heal. She's blocked sexually because she's blocked emotionally due to trauma. However, she has to decide to help herself. Nothing you can really do here. It's time for you to decided if this is a deal breaker for you and make a tough call. You are not her therapist, remember that. So ask yourself if you would stay considering that what you see today is the best version of herself.

Woups! I did indeed. Sorry OP!

Or a walk in the park? I mean these options are safe for us women. You need to know someone to go on adventures with them too. Imagine you go on a hike with a woman on a first date, and then she confesses she's a serial killer OR she dislikes all things LGBTQ... That would be a tough one to leave mid-hike!

Totally. Let it all out and take your time 💚

You're snooping because your gut feelings are telling you something is off. It sounds like she has poor boundaries with this trainer and she enjoys his attention. Honestly, if she cared about your concerns, she would have limited her contact with him to professional only. But it seems she doesn't see how this affects you. I would have a sit down and talk with her about this at a calm convenient time. Let her know your concerns and see if she's willing to discuss boundaries or her POV and find a convenient middle ground for both of you. If she's not, you have deeper problems in this marriage (lack of trust, resentment, ect.) and you need to consider marriage counseling.

Okay, so you almost got somewhere with this lady. Keep doing those events and at some point you will find a lady that will say YES. Just ask her out before she leaves or take her phone number and ask her out next day/ asap. Rejections are redirections. Perhaps you should be thankful she said no as she sounds like she still has feelings for an ex, which is a no-go.

First few weeks? You should mention this in the first dates. And, you're not limiting yourself. You're being upfront with others and giving them the choice early on to pursue dating you or not. Being bisexual comes with a more limited dating pool, and you should accept that.

Too many red flags and you are incompatible. Since you moved in with her, you were able to spot these early on. I agree with others. Time to leave this stressful and messy situation.

I don't get it. What's so fine about her? She sounds like a player and a good one. She knows she's attractive and that she can get any man hooked including yourself. This woman even allows stranger men to touch and kiss her without even knowing her/talking to her. Ick!! Talk about a lack of boundaries and hunger for attention and risks. And as you see, she intentionally deceived you while telling you she has too many fish in the sea. How un-classy and arrogant. And you think she is fine? Or did you mean hot? A hot mess for sure. She doesn't want to see you. You can move on. Please increase your dating standards and when someone like her is so upfront about her pursuits like this, ask yourself if this matches your values.

Have you considered your abortion options regarding the baby? (If it's not too late) That aside, I agree with everyone. You need to block him to help yourself. Otherwise, you can't move on. Keeping in touch with him is like being someone trying to get sober at a bar. It doesn't work! Once you block him everywhere, you will get closure and be able to slowly see things more clearly.

Absolutely kick him to the curb. He's not faithful and he does not respect YOU nor your kids and nor your marriage. He's f*ing around in Dubai like a single man while his wife does all the heavy lifting. The real reason he won't leave you is because of the wife benefits. You take care of the house, kids, listen to him, pay some bills, and give him sex when he's there. If he doesn't convince you to stay, he'll have to deal with custody, showing up as a father, and taking care of his place. That's too much hard work for him, so it's best for HIM that you stay. He'll tell you a few words like "I love you", make you feel like a bad guy or manipulate you so you to stay. He's taking you for a fool who's willing to do anything for him. Let that sink in. Now please, next time he's back serve him the divorce paper and let him know there's no discussion about this anymore. Be a good example to your kids. You are worthy of a loyal faithful and caring man. Someone who is available and steps up for you and the kids. Nothing less! Take care. I'm sorry you're going through this, but you know the way out.

He is an abusive POS. He feeds off your attention and that of other women. Good thing you broke up with him early on. I suggest reporting him to the campus security so that they have your back. Let your friends and family know that you want nothing to do with him and that they should block him too. If this escalates, get a restraining order. I'm sorry it's going this way.

Yes, but loving him is not your purpose in life. When you date someone, you need to focus on observing if they can be a good partner to you. If you see red flags, you walk away instead of pushing them under the rug. You do this to protect yourself and make sure you have a loyal and dedicated partner and father. I'm very sorry that you're going through this. I suggest you tune in more with your gut feelings and how you feel overall in this relationship. Do you feel valued? Special? Safe? There's a reason you came here to this forum, so listen to where it's coming from.

@mylolita I like your questions, but I think they should have their own new post.

So all the comparison to his exes you mentioned previously was about about exes in his early 20s?! Damn, that's even more immature. I agree on this. Same. OP, he will introduce you to his family when he feels comfortable. But, you are not feeling adequate in this relationship so I think it's more than just that. You need reflect on how you feel and use that as your guide.

In sorry you're going through this. Always trust your gut feelings. He has so many read flags leaving you feeling inadequate. It's not worth it. He's not worth it. I would break it off and tell him this isn't working. But for some reason, you want to give him excuses. What do you find so attractive about him? Why can't you honour and respect your feelings?

Girl, see... YOU have set the pace this way. You got him used to the fact you will do the initiating, calling, pursuing, ect. No wonder when you don't do it, he won't neither. That tells you ALL you need to know: he's not that into you. He's not interested. He acts flaky. And he's just not serious about you. A man who is serious about you would make it known and wouldn't leave you guessing. I suggest you cut contact with him and move on. He has shown you who he is with his actions and he's not that into you. He's a waste of your time. And for next dates, only stay with someone who matches your energy and initiative. Otherwise, again, they waste your time by keeping you on the hook as f buddy or back up plan. Don't be any of these and immediately cut contact when the energy is not matched. You are worthy and deserve someone who makes you feel special and like a priority.

But, you knew it was going nowhere. You knew he was leaving. I suggest you cut contact with him and give yourself some space to heal. Block him if needed and unfollow him on social media. Hang out with your friends, have fun, watch sad romantic movies, have some ice cream,... Whatever you need to slowly come out of it. It sucks, but you're going to be okay.

And we shouldn't settle for any less.