al7

1. I am sorry we are talking about double standards here. Men do not have that preference at all "I want her to earn as much as I do" in fact they, men, would rather prefer her not to earn much. 2. So what? I find your tone parentlike and a bit crabby. so what? It is fin with me. 3. Well, since I do online dating only (I do not know any women offline to ask them out) I told you about my onling dating experience. Sure offline life should be a bit easier. I agree. Still something tells me that people onlinf and people offline basically.... are the same peopel, aren't they? Just they are more picky online. 4. So what? It is negative all right but not patronizing. I would rather appreciate you answering my pm with that kind of critique: I asked for the critique there, in pm, but you give me it here where I didn't ask for it at all. 5. Dont think if she earns much mor ethan he does would bring a lot of happiness. Eventually she will start to think "Who is the breadwinenr here?" which do not lead to anything good. Just my opinion. 6. Ok, you think online dating is not somehting you should consider ok, I do not mind. Would a real life survey from a psychology book make more sense?

1. Where.. where I can find those type of groups????? I have been looking for some sort of affordable speech therapy (to reduce my accent) , a stundet or somehting.. but schools around here which teach speech pathology just directed me to ESL groups which has nothign to do with speech pathology. Anyway, just for info: 1 hour of regular speech pathlogists cost about $264. 2. Maybe, I am just not sure: imagine I show up and say I am interested in theater. They listen to me and first thing they say would be youbetter work on your accent first. Right? It woudl be starnge if I say well guys I am interested in helping you out with decorations.. 3. it sounds that course is for some people who have at least some experience and some strang interest in it. I didn't even start yet... 4. Well, my accent is not like British or Australian ok... it is much heavier that require a lot of work. The thing is I cannot work on it just by myself... I would definitely lie to find tips on how to deal with it r how to improve and especially how to find people who can help....

I guess you are right. I am very introverted and basically do not know how to socialize with a light tone. I mean I know "in general" but I lack skills and practice sinnce I do not know many people around here. So, if I am being just myself.. hmm.. I am quiet and reserved which i snot good. I am looking for somehting to improve it, that right.

1. I guess there are two stereotypes: a) latino men are hot.. (more passionate, more emotional in a good sense, more bold with women...) so it is a turn on. b) latino men are more poor than white men in general..so it might be kind of a turn off. 2. My personal opinion it is the case, you are right. I didn't grew up in North American though, but to me a difference in mentality of latin people and white could be tiny, but it is much bigger between the white and the black. I guess it has to do with some race pride when the black are not willing to give up anything from their culture: good or bad. 3. Definitely, funny that you ask. 4. Well.. latina girls are very hot, in my opinion. Why would I care about my family preferences for her race? I don't. 5. You are right, it boild down to culrural background, plus I am sure you do not have an accent. Though if you have anything liek southern drawl.. well... it sounds really really funny here up North. 6. Simplest question I ever seen. I wish all questions were like that. 7. Skin color doesn't matter that much. Your accent, you income\job, you willingness to assimilate with th culture. (well you dont need that I guess).. are all thing that matter much more!

1. I agree sounds fun. Just I have a very heavy accent and speak much slower than average English speaker does, so theater is not really for me I'd like to do that though...maybe... but my performance sucks big time. I guess I would better improve my vocal confidence first. How could I find some group\semminar that might help? 2. toastmasters are great, I have visited them. They are very organized and very directed: they pracitice giving public speech. Since I had some teaching experience I already overcome most part of theat "public speasking anxiety" that toastmasters are addressing. Again, they are great I recommed them to people, plus it is practically almost for free. I also visited local forensics team. They kick me out... because I am not undergrad anymore, that had that weird qualification there. In what direction should I make a search?

1. Yes, it is. 2. What did you say exactly? "We are just friends you know?" So may I assume you were not interested in her? Or just scred of her bold approach... clarify pls. 3. Yes, you are. What scares you: she or her breaking stereotypes approach?

Please be specifc: how do I learn how to be funny? Watch Robin Williams, is that what you mean? ....I do not think it has anything to do with confidence though.

You look better with glasses to me. I guess you have to: 1. Add more light, the pic is VERY dark. 2. Take out that flowers from the left. 3. Put on some nice black shirt...or just somehting black: a sweater, a leather coat...for example.

It is skill again. I dont mind to learn how to make people laugh. Please advice how and where then.

1. I have books, but they are not the same as skills: you go to school to learn somehtign not just sit around books. Site.. what do you mean? what do they offer? I found some site that offere seminars but faaar from my area. 2. Haha, you are funny, that is what seminars for: to learn how to not get nervous.

Can anyone recommend me how coudl I increase my confidence level in term sof social skills\vocal-speech confidence? Has anyone heard about any kind of seminars\group? Any practial approach to tackle this? Thanks!

How about if you starting talking to her from a topic of having kids.. and how much you want to have kids.. and how much you want to provide them a good life with with education... and how much it costs. Start with that: it will make het think at least a little bit about the spending habits. I would advice you to talk about money in several talks: do not say all at one "session". First bring kids needs & education, next time: that she may not work as much as she does now and how it will affects money that you can save for kids..next time you needs to assess how much she spends on average and point out it is not possible to spend that money while she won't be working AND providing a good money for kids...etc Annie, I agree about the advice. It is good. And I like Suze Orman as a woman and a person: she speaks good and dress nice. But do you know she does not have college education? Anyway, I find that she says things that are just common sense: do not spend more then you can afford: estimate you expenses and figure out if you can afford it. I really wonder why so many people listen\read\watch her seminar as if they have less common sense than she does. Just curious.

1. Man... you ran out of dates at work and are angry about that???? I don't have any females at work at all. You simple should forget about your work and try new places. 2. What a good question really is how you dress? For a date? or when you are about to meet some girl? Sweatpants would make any girl sick right away....

1. If 17 years of praying didn't help much, maybe it is not enough? 2. I don't think God overlook this situation and is trying to share all girlfriends on the earth FAIRLY to all men. I don't think God is distributes girlfriends at all. 3. Could be. Start looking for women who do not have boyfriends. 4. Could be, but you don't care if it is coverup or not. It doesn matter. 5. Didn't approached enough girls... didn't develop social skills. I guess it is a long enough list. 6. Believe me, girls do not care if you lose patience or not. So better try a different approach to dating, ok. Have you heard of fast dating? Onlind dating? Have you tried it before you are going to explode? You are saying like if you explored all dating options already.

ok, I like a debate. But I usually have a goal to figure out somehting out of a debate, to learn somehting? to get a new info? to figure out a common steretype? Somehting like that. Anyway.. Does Romy Miller rings a bell? She is the auther of the book that was recommnded to you by sombody here... I got the book, read it and figured otu she is.. nobody. She doesn't have a degree, not she has a publications or other books. She doesn't have anything in the field of dating except maybe experience of which is quiet about.... And she managed to write a book about dating that does make a difference! Without anything! You still think if you can make a diference? ok, Here in US we hav Suze Orman, she is super popular person in the area of finance: ton sof books, video and seminar, She is on TV all the time. Does she have a college degree in finance? no. Does she have a college degree at all? no. In fact the most advertised fact about her that she had been working as a waitress for 7 years. (I don't know why they chose to advertise this fact as something important.. as if waitresses have best understanding of finance in US). Anyway, she looks good, dresses good and extremely popular. She explains simple things by making it even more simplier.... Her popularity is enormous... So can you make a difference you think you you still can't since you don't have a degree yet, a job, more or experience? Those people did, and some were super successful without anything to start with. What stops you from wrieting a book? ok, an article in local newspaper? organizing group? Educate people in any way?

Man, I am sorry, but didn't you realize she's got paid to talk to customers in a nice way? And you were a customer. Plus if you would noticed her wedding band it all would be even more clear.

1. Sorry Annie, can't agree. Why would you want to talk.. possible date mainly approachable looking guys (or women for if you pretend you are a guy)? What is behind it? Please think about it: there is a fear and lack of social skills from both sides then.. if you chose to approach only happy-smily approachable looking women. First a guy who approach only approachble looking women lacks social skills himself and should work on it instead of concentrating on only this type if women. Plus, the approachable women are being arroached a lot! And it might be more frustrating to a guy to figure out all women he approched are taken. Please just think about this. 2. From what I read you are quite competitve. But probably you also are kind and polite. And that makes a difference.

Not sure about jealous part or academics in particular, since biology major tend to be quite social here.., but I have to admit people in mid-west, especially in technical fields are either very introverted or lack social skills. Which makes them cold at best.

Just curious.. if have to wait 3 month to get a Mocha? You cannot ask you relative to buy you this? or to buy it and cook at home? Maybe I am missing somehting but it should be an easy thing.

1. I guess you are very much right. I cannot say for sure since I have not been down South, but I lived in Europe for quite a long time. First of all engineers are so socially dumb people I cannot even imagine who might be doing worse than that (ok I am an example) Plus people in the North are known for being cold and competitve and not social. That rumor is not trur about social Midwesterners... 2. It could be a) they hate that you gave a good speech since they are too competitive b) they were just giving you a feeback.. maybe your tone of voice were too steady or somehting or maybe you memorized all the talk and deliver it is a steady voice like if you were reading it... who know, we didn't hear your speech. It could be a combination of a) + b) which is more likely. 3. Definitely people here in Midwest are VERY closed off, especially people close to technical fields like engineers...I am one of them, I lack social skills but I do not like this situation. 4. Speaking about the confidence.. has anyone heard about some sort fo seminars...course.. workshoos "How to build social skills.. confidence"?

Of course that's right. Why what makes you think it is NOT? The more you are able to do in terms of your social life, the more success you have over othert guys the more women and better women you can get. It is simple, isn't it? It is funny what people are saying here: do not brag brag about... let her know by a convo who you are... But that is exatly what you have to do: if you got a millionon the bank and say that fact to a girl, they wont like you at all. But if you drive a nice BMW, it says you have some decent money and it is a huge attraction without bragging about. Plus what a convo is? It is basically bragging about what have you done. So you gotta advertise yourself and you can be pretty aggressive in that actvity.

1. You are talking about some handsome hunks from magazines cover. What if I am not that physically attractive and not girls find it appealing? I still should "let her find out who you are,"? How exactky you suggest to do that? 2. Man... that what I am talking about: social skills: to be able to make a good joke, good convo...it is very hard for some people to be social. For example I am quite anti-social type. Those things are not SIMPLE. Sure if you are ALREADY good at socializing you don't have to worry about getting a date. Well then you don't even have to biother to look at this forum. Those guys\girls are fine.

RayKay, I hoped you got that I didn't mean you. Or "all women with large breasts". It is about "most likely case"and statistics. Look, if a girl has large breasts.. she cannot hide them ok... guy noticed those. What do you think guys would think about collecting stamps then? Large breasts is additional attraction, so more guys hit on these type of women. Who what kinda of guys would hit on a women because she has large breast? a bit insolent, bold and who do not htink much, again - "most likely", not every guys is like that. So these women have to deal with lots of aggressive less thinking guys. Eventually she might think "oh all guys are like that"... which might make her more bitter than other average sized women.