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If you are as a gender entitle to some privileges, you will defend them with some sense or no sense at all. It is not about logc and what makes sense. It is about the gender of the author. Each person will defend their own gender stereotypes, especially those that benefit their gender. Conclusion? Do not expect much sense at all, since stereotypes themself have no sense.

1. Annie, it is not exactly it. As you said there are alway some single people out there. Th thing is in your early 20s, no one require you to be establisehd or have megabucks. Later on, you must have carrer, must have a great paying job.. otherwise most cute looking women even will not bother to to look at a guy. 2. Many divorced people are bitter and many have 2 kids already. It is not fun to date them. 3. I guess you kno how it work: send 20 emails (which is a lot of work) then get say 2 replies... one is quit another one is a girl of 300 lbs literally. Gotta start again from scratch...after some 5-10 such cycles.. I started thinking: dating is fun is not it? hahahaa It is not like for women: wehn you have 100 applications\profiles in front of you and just need to chose who you are going to date. In my case, if I email anyone who has a pic up, no way she would reply. Twoo busy with checking other guys. and playing a blind date seems always end up with somebody who is extremely overweight. I personally like girls with some curves, no skinny ones. But there is a coomon sense limit in gaining weight...... if you look at scales, and it says 200-300 lbs, something is wrong! 4. Cool, you can walk there? I forgot how to do it almost. We do not sidewalk or anything like that in most places. What did they say? Just curiosu about good opening jokes

1. Well..I hope your blood pressure is still within limits 2. It could be. Although one of potential problems associated with it is still not about men but about you. Look at this this way: basically you choose men who you are going to go on a date with. So, somehow you select men who tend to have that carefree quality and want low maintanence woman. Now who could be these men: a) some guys who do not care at all about anything..it is unlikely you chose them obviously. Though if he is a cool, handsome bad boy why not.. right? b) Men who have resources more than average men do. This type of men has plenty of looks\money, which in a twist way tells them they do not need to do anything more: they brought money and have looks. Those are just two potential answers. 3. Well, if you choose a guy who is actually a prince.. he is not going to spend much time on you. He is prince right? Something that you say .. reminds me you are looking for a prince: lot of time alone waiting for that one man". A prince is some sort of ideal guy, and ideal guys always starts with good looks\good income. If you go for this type sure you have to be ready for sacrifices: he is not going to devote much of his time to relationship, since resources makes him... well.. too confident? 4. Just note how funny: he didn't reply to a single post when we (or somebody else) was advising him to get out and look outside his usual circle of people he knows. He is quiet when it comes to a common sense advice. Which makes me think he is very happy with this situation for some reason: as you said, women require more than just dinners. Somthing stops him from doing more productive dating step. 5. Really? I have never been in one, I guess I should try this place 6. Good point! He should not ask models out if he feels is not one.

Why to repeat the old truth? We all know feminists are just BSing as some other people are. So what? What is the point? We, men, have never liked feminists. It is all known thing. ...You better do somehting about it, somehting new. How about educating people, for example with an article "How to spot a feminist?"

1. I personally would not jump to conclusions. The question whom are they dating or got married to? 2. If you are sure about it, there should be a clear reason behind it. Right? What is your opinion about it, what it might be? Hint: is it something about you. 3. Interesting.. if you knew them well, maybe you can shre the recipe of "How to get a man while being horrendous kinda gal"? 4. Oh it is so easy to answer.. really. Much easier than you think it could be. 5. Well.. the term Karma comes from Indian philosophy. There, in India they thought of Karma not only as of somthing abstract, that has nothing to do with real world things. They still have a system of social casts, that assigns more value to an individul according to his social stratum directly. We also have a social system, but the difference is that we do not call it directly "cast system" and do not say directly who has more values. 6. My opinion he simply does not want to get out of his comfort zone of co-workers and friends (he didn't try to ask out anyone besidesthis tiny circle). Let think about it: you look at all you friends\coworkers and see no dating material, what would you do? Right, you expand this circle somehow. Kyoshiro simply doesn't want to do it as if he cannot.

I am very specific in what I say: approaching approchable women did not do any good in my experience of online dating: the more approachble she looks the more likely she won't respond. It is just experience I guess it even doesn't have anything to do with being optimistic or not... You see, I have tried that, I have some experience (it is online only, but it is still qualify to be an experience, since I initiated the contact). I am sure you do not have that kind of experience, since you are a woman and obviously do not approach guys. You are right: risk. It is true, though it os more like gambling: you could be so optimistic about it and gamble all the time, but all know who is going to win. The same with approachable women: they are already taken mostly since they are approched all the time. Makes sense?

1. Annie, he figured out all women he knows (at his work, friends) are taken and thats it. I don't understand why to not look at pther places? At other women he doesnt know yet? 2. Statistics says 78 single women vs 100 single men. link removed But it is tricky: women live significantly longer so there are singlnificantly more single women in older age group (men simply have died out) than say on 25-35 age group. For NY in people over 65, there is 7.2% women over 4.5% men. link removed

1. Annie, it is not like all money from rent you can put into your house. it is not even close! You have to throw away 225k in my example, or 7.5k per year. plus you have to throw away house insurance, mortgage insurance, land taxes and house taxes. (about 3.5k per year) You simply choose what to throw away each year: 11k or 6k. Something tells me 6k is less to throw away. 2. You start thinking from some other "end": from kids and lifestyle. C'mon, after you graduate you are not going to have 3 kids and a house, right? You are going to look for a job. That means you probably have to move. Where? to a an apartemnt first. That means 1 year lease. What are you going to do there? not saving? You better save you 50k in the first year, and 50k in the second one, then buy a house get a loan for another 50k and living in the house pay off the moratge in the third year. Don't thin in terms of 30 year loans. It lead to financial burden for the whole life. I dont like that. 3. Well, you have to save a lot and fast, I dont want to you buy a house when you are about to retire. 4. Then you know that still you'll have to pay 1) community fee ($200 typically per month), 2) loan insurance (maybe $50). 3) interest to the bank (again about 6%) And again you are going to rent first something most likely for a year. Save some money in the first year and buy a condo in the next one, and pay it off on the second year. If you like plans (appears you do) plan it for youself. It all sounds so simple... I wonder if Suze says anything about that. 5. He is smart, but he coul be percieved as "cheap". We'll see, hopefully he'll update us soon.

Attention by itself is not that great: ok, there is a guy who is doing that... (not the guy) but you just not into him, for example cuz he doesn't look like any kind of mixture Vid Diesel\Pierce Brosnan\Bill Gates. You don't consider him attractive and it would not matter to you at all.... So attention is a tricky thing, it depends on who give it to us. You are not happy with just "a boy". If you are talking about the guy you met at Starbucks... well, since you notice he was handsomely cute, he is probably... taken already. Is not it simple? He is cute -> people notice that -> other women notice that -> other women have done somehting already. If he is handsome statistically speaking he has two gf or a wife with 3 kids already.

Being a spoiled brat leads to financial irresponsibility I guess. He loves her, nothing wrong with being in love with a spoiled brat kinda girl... I mean it is his problem. Our problem is to point it out that she is spoiled, but it appear he knows it too already.

Annie, you scared me with your statement. $375,000 is what most people do not have in cash all right, but what they are going to have to pay in cash!!! Instead of jst paying $150,000 right away. My idea is to for example save as much as you can say $100,000, then get a loan for that $50,000 and pay it off in the very first year. I'll explain it: look so many people tell you do not rent you throw away money you can put into you house. Lets see: you gotta pay 375k in 30 years for the house, ok. 225k to pay only in interest. So roughly you have to pay about makes 225/12=7.5k per year plus land and house taxes and insurance that amounts to about another 3-4k. Each year to gotta throw away 7.5+3.5=11k. I guess it is much better to reant an apartment for $500 for one year (12*500=6k) or two years (12k) and save about 100k in the meantime. You spend 6k in rent, but i fyou get a loan a buy a house you'd have to throw away each year not 6k but 11k, almost double of that! So it is much cheaper to rent first, and save all your money and then buy a house. Plus, there is an interesting complication is involved. You start working and what? you immmediated buy a house? I don't think so, you first reant an apartement, right? most aprt lease are for 1 year terms... doesn't it suggest you gotta rent at least first year and save all you money for a house? or even rent for two years, since each year you spend 5k less by renting then owning a house. Hope it is gettin clear....?

Never been on a date ever, or had a situation where I'm "about to meet someone." ok, when you ask women out how are you dressed? You gotta be dressed nice! Dont expect her say "yes" if you wear sneakers and sweatpants.

Ok, I'll try to believe it is not the gender stereotypes. And I guess now I can understand you: you made a valid point: if a guy would bother me, tired already, with some sort of conversation I would just be unwilling to converse with him. Probably you imagine that kind of situation. But, since you are a woman and she is a guy, it is a very different situation. He will talk to you no matter what... even if he cannot speak at all Guy love women attention.

1. more than that: I have never had other attitude, I had always had that figured out. When I was a kid with less common sense I simply didn't have money to fool around at all. 2. Probably. Have no idea what he does and his sister was probably embaraased to tell me how he handles money. 3. Could be true, but it is not the main reason some people are broke. The reason people are broke is that they can buy everything on credit, when they spend money they do not have yet. For example I believe you gotta sve money before you buy a house and not fro downpayment only. You gotta pay more than 250% of the house cost if you get a loan. It means instead of just buying a house for its nominal coats, i.e. 100%, you'll end up paying 2.5 times more!!! and it is not like a meal in an expensive place whi would not make you broke anyone. ok $15 - is a ok good meal, $45 is kind a expensive.. but who cares if it is just a meal? right. If it is a house that costs say just $150,000 than after payig all interest to a bank you will have to pay $375,000! So you pay $225,000 to a bank just cuz it allowed you to loan the money! Dont you think it is a little bit TOO MUCH?? Even Suze Orman doesn't teach you that you gotta save money BEFORE you buy a house, because a bank that give a loan just gets all your money doing basically nothing. No she does teach that I guess, she just choose not to emphasize that point, and go with the mainstream of bank\loan\mortage approach. 4. You are right.. I dont get it: if I want to lose weight I just eat less... hmmm... intresting world. People spend money they do not own, eat more than they need.... 5. Maybe. I think she is more like a spoiled brat. I would be very careful giving her "$100 here, $50 there"... It is a huge red stop sign.. the sign of Stop. Turn around and Run away... A book won't help her unless she's got into financial trouble and then figure out herself that she should not spent more than she earn. It is very simple.

Annie, I didn't mean you, I answer his eagerness specifically. I honestly think you were not that much scared of bugging him, ok. I beliefe you were much more scared to break a gender stereotype regarding who approch whom first. I cannot say all 100% men would think it is so good. but even if some guys are so much rigidly into stereotypes, believe me, you do not want to deal with them. So yes, I guess some polite comments about the weather from you would wake him up Just I was not sure what you were asking specifically since we all know you would not be bugging him: you know that, we feel that way and I am very sure that guy would feel the same way: to answer you question specifically. But we also have gender stereotypes...

Kyoshiro Ogari: If a woman approached me in Starbucks, I would run up the highest hill, spin around Well I guess this is exactly why women do not approach guys: most of us, guys, would be so eager to talk to a girl.. and women do not like "eager" guys who are just happy with any kind of women. Women do like selective, picky guys. It is simple: a selective guy is hard to get...so it appear he's got some value.. just because he is hard to get.

1. Sure I agree, once you have a family you will get more expenses. But the question is would it lessen my ability to manage my finances? To manage, not to increases or make more savings? My ability in terms of financial responsibility is something of how I think. A family could make me spend a lot more, but it would not change how I make savings. Right? 2. Hmm.. I can help. That's easy. 3. Ohh....is not it a common sense? The sooner you start savings the more you will get! The more you save each month the more you get! Those figures do not change how much money you have. Think about it: if you come up with a number it doesnt mean you have this number available each month. My concept is simplistic: you save as much as you can, do not throw your money - is not it simple? I respect Suze's achievement as a pubic speaker! But I feel like I already know all what she says. I was just wondering isn't obvious to all people? 4. Annie, we are all adults here... kind of. We all know it is irresposible to keep horses if you cannot afford them. My point is: if she is not responsible financially and lack some simple common sense in finance, I really doubt that any kind of financial self help book would give her this resposnsibility. It is not about book, it is about the way you live, when you have some common sense and based on it you can decide what you can afford and what you cannot. I do not have american background. Maybe if I had grown up in US \ I would have been thinking differently...But for me money management is the simplest thing you can do: just use you common sense, do not buy things just cuz "they are cool". Save as much as you can. Is not it simple? ... today I talk to my friend's wife about her brother whos got a great job and in credit card debts. I just could not get how in teh world he can have debts earning 3 times more than I do and not having a family? He is not a gambler or anything, he is a just an average american guy...

Neither did Winston Churchill, F. Scott Fitzgerald, Bill Gates (dropped out of Harvard, first year). first Duke of Wellington, and many more successful people. Hehe, you thought I am trying to belittle her? It all depends how we look at it...I was VERY surprised that Suze a) is extremely popular b) says VERY simple things, super simple c) and yes, she reache dthat with no college education. She gave us a lot to think about, she shows a way we should think about..not some useless degrees (I have more college degress that you can imagine and working on another one) But I do feel degrees do not help you in real life.

1. Why is it a problem? I am not at socializing, I do not talk much, I have hard time talking to people I do not know, I basically cannot find people to spend quality time with. Friends are hard to find especially when you are quiet and reserved. Make sense? 2. Dive in.. what? I just do not know how to be good at socializing.. I guess you are just too good at it or have too many friends and it i snot obvious to you. You are right in the sense I am different. 3. Right. Thats why I am looking for some sort of training in this area, any info could help: for example I already email some local theaters...we'll see what'll happen.

I started to dislike these kinda comments, "be a comedian, get charisma" If I knew how to tell jokes like Robin Williams I would do that. If I knew how to practice charisma I would do that already. The problem I DO NOT know how to do that. Thats why I ask for advice where\who SPECIFICALLY can help me with that. You know about seminars about RObin Williams? Or Charisma? Then let me know. Otherwise please stick to the topic do not tell me "just be confident and tell jokes". I hope I am very on that issue.

Ask you sister to buy that coffee from Starbucks and make it at home. Sure you can buy it and then cook at home. No need to long for it for so long.

I understand Annie. Still I think my point is valid: most approachable looking women are not the best women to date. Think about it: most likely they are already taken, since all guys want to approach them. Their approachability in fact works against men in this case: men approach approachable women, find out they are taken... and they, men, got frustrated...Why? Cuz they chose the simpliet way....and it is not the best way. Please think about it, it is not that obvious.

Annie, I am just amazed by her. No big educaton, lots of money, lost of fame. and she is not saying anything we do not know... Whta I am still wondering don't people already know that simple truth that she is saying? Resposibility, spend not more that you eran etc? It is all so inteeresting... What new info you found the book you were reading? I bet you already know all that stuff even without Suze. I am not planning to live up to 90. Besides when you are 90, you don't really care about money that much. No I am not planning to save for 401 in next 5-10 years.I have a lot to spend money on right now, not after some 30-40 years when I would not care about it.

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