eviljedi

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Hey, just posting this question, Is Flirting Necessary, because if it is, I don't think I do it enough. I talk to girls etc but I just talk to them as if they are guys and I'm wondering if they think I just like them as friends because of this? I want to start flirting more but I'm not really sure how? Is flirting just complimenting them, or is it something else? Any pointers? Cheers eviljedi

Thanks for the advice guys, recently I've been going through really weird phases where one day I'll be really shy and the next I'll be more confident that I've ever been.

Hey, I recently realised that when I'm not around my friends in school or with people I know well, I get really shy. This girl was trying to talk to me at work (I think she liked me) and I just felt so awkward and couldn't be myself. In school if someone who I have never met before talks to me, even if my friends aren't around, I somehow feel more at ease and more confident. This has started to worry me because I'm leaving school shortly to go to university and I don't want to go back to my shy ways! Any tips would be great! Thanks eviljedi

lol, I never said I had no friends, I have loads of friends and not one of them is 'normal'. I don't really think anyone is 'normal'. You are you and you just need to accept that and quit moaning about how the world doesn't understand you. Perhaps if you didn't right people off and gave them a chance more people would accept you.

Sometimes I feel like the girl will think I'm just trying to talk to her to get laid.

Why would you want to be 'normal'?

Hey, recently I've been feeling really down because I'm nearly 18 and I've never had a girlfriend, is that weird? All my friends have had at least one girlfriend and they say I should get one. I used to be really shy and I guess that's why I've not really met a lot of girls but over the past few years I've gained lots of confidence and I'm not afraid to talk to girls anymore. I don't like going to clubs etc to meet girls. I just want to meet a girl somewhere else and get to know her; but all the girls I've met so far just want to be friends! I'm going to university in a few months so I'm hoping to meet lots of new people there, but I often find it difficult to think of things to talk about with girls. With guys it's no problem, sports, computer games, music etc but I don't know much about what girls like. If you guys have any advice I would really appreciate it Thanks eviljedi

Ask him!

Hey, I recently noticed a few things I do when I talk and I've been trying to 'fix' them. I don't know if you would call them speech impediments or not but I can't stop myself from doing them. 1. If anyone asks me a question I ALWAYS say, "eh...." before I answer, even if I know the answer I don't know why, I've tried to stop myself and its really anyoing me. 2. When I'm talking to people even if I know something 100% I always say, "I think...." even if I know, I don't know why. I think these might be to do with me having a lack of confidence as a child. Can someone please give me advice for breaking out of these habits and becoming a more confident speaker. Thanks eviljedi

Hey, in about a month or so I have my final exams and normally I would have started studying about this time; but this year I'm finding it really hard to get motivated. This is my final year at school and next year I'm going to university. I only need to pass 1 exam out of 4 to get in, because I done well at my exams last year. I sat down to study yesterday and I had my notes in front of me but I just couldn't do it, I don't know what's wrong with me I've never been like this before. I think it might be because these exams don't really matter to me once I get into university. I don't really care that much about failing 3 out of 4 exams, I would be slightly disappointed but once I have started university it would be forgotten. My problem is I feel like I might let my parents, relatives and teachers down by not giving 100%. My maths teacher keeps going on about how I'm going to get an A but at this rate I'm not even going to pass and I really don't want to disappoint him. This is the first year I've felt any kind of pressure about passing exams to please other people, last year I just tried to do my best for me, not anybody else. But this year I don't care that much and I need some motivation! Somebody help please! Thanks eviljedi

I kinda started to feel like that now, im not leaving the country but im going to uni soon and I just feel like no one understands me, I feel like there is something missing inside. I think it might just be because im going through a big change and once I get settled I will feel better.

Good advice, its just before talking to a starnger was a 'risk' to me. But now I need to do more for me to feel like im taking a risk.

He spilt the milk all down me first so I put it all over his face, I kinda wish I didn't now.

Donno about irish, im scottish Yeah, today I chucked milk all over one of my friends, at the time it felt like the right thing to do, lol Btw (might be venting my anger here) but I cant see any need for ang3l2004's post, it was pointless.

Hey, I think I might have a problem with anger. I tend to be nice to people all the time even when they make me angry and then suddenly something will happen that will set me off and il go berserk. Kinda like the film 'Me, Myself and Irene'. A few people have told me this and say im like a different person for a while, is there anyway to control anger and let it out slowly instead of in huge bursts? Thanks eviljedi

I had that once when I was 16, it went away after a while tho

Thanks for the good advice ppl

What kind of 'things'?

Hey, a few months ago I got my first job in a supermarket. The main reason I wanted a job was obviously for money but I also wanted to practice meeting new people. Now that I have got to know a few people I realized that my confidence has improved massively over the past 2 years. They treat my like all the other guys etc. But when Im in school, because people are so used to my shyness they treat me different. Even when im being confident and stuff they just try and put me down or give me weird looks as if im doing something abnormal. How can I change people's perception on me in school so they will see me as being more confident, because I already know I am but they can't see that. Thanks

Hey, I wanna know if I'm too picky with the girls I try and date. I know a few girls that go to my school and they always stare at me and flirt. They are quite attractive and my friends say they would defiantly like to go out with them. When I see them I know they are attractive but for some reason I just cant picture myself being in a relationship with them. There has only ever been 2 or 3 girls that I have liked enough and thought it could perhaps lead somewhere but they either didn't like me or I ruined it. I also see guys looking at girls and saying things like "I would 'do' her" etc. I kinda feel awkward when people say stuff like that when they don't even know the girl. I wanna meet someone whos attractive but also someone who I can relate to, one of my friends has got a gf like this. They are into all of the same music and stuff and he always has a really good time with her (I want something like that!). My other friends just go out with girls for their looks and don't have that special connection. I think im gonna wait till I find someone who I get on with really well, or am I being too picky and should I just date girls based on looks? Thanks eviljedi

I used to think that girls always wanted guys to talk about macho stuff and not be into anything nerdy, then I met a couple of guys who were kind of nerdy playing computer games all the time watching LOTRs a million times etc. I found out they had girlfriends, really hot girlfriends! I guess its just about being you and being comfortable with yourself its just most nerds seem to have low confidence.

Whatever you do, don't look at their mouth, that makes people think you want to kiss them

I'm like you, naturally shy. I used to meet with groups of friends and just sit and listen while all of them were talking. I didn't even realize that I was doing it, that's what I'd always done. Then one day I figured it out and decided to try and do something about it. It was really hard at first and I had to force myself to say things and sometimes there would be awkward silences etc. The only advice I can give you is to just keep persevering and eventually you will be able to start conversations naturally and it will be really easy. We learn from experience, I'm still learning. If you want to turn some of your work colleagues into friends just say something like; can you email me when I'm due in for my next shift. Give them your email address and then another time you can just email them if something funny happens in work and take it from there. They may even start to email you first (socially). The only way to get better at these kinds of thing is by trying and learning from your experiences.

yea, i don't really mind if she dosn't like me, but i dont wanna scare her off.