About My Bestfriend

I'm going to break this story down into three parts so it doesn't get messy; I'm a bad story teller sorry!

1. (Before the feelings)

2. (Summer of 2018)

3. (September - October)

1. Before I met her, she was just another person who my ex did not want me to talk to. It was only after a recent breakup that I started talking to her, but only as friends. She knew about my ex, asked about what happened, and invited me over to comfort me, which is all that happened. After a few weeks of talking in class, we began to hang out almost every day. We teased eachother, flirted, went out to dinner and movies together, and we both considered eachother our best friends. The only downside was that she was not your AVERAGE girl, a girl who enjoyed talking to guys in THAT way, but that didn't matter because we were friends at the time.

2. Fastforward into the beginning of summer, this was where we both caught feelings at the same time. She joked about telling her friends I was her boyfriend in a very sarcastic way, and when she asked me what I wanted my future wife to be, I said, 'not you thats for sure' she felt upset (we talked about how we first started liking eachother). We went to a party together and both got very drunk, I tried talking to her and she didn't like that, she wanted to hear my feelings from sober me. Near the end of the summer, we started losing contact and eventually got into an argument about how I wasn't there for her anymore, leading to her giving a blowjob to another guy days after the argument.

3. When school started back up again, so did our relationship. We talked about what happened over the summer, and it was after the third time I got rejected that she began to realize she didn't want me to be with anybody else. Her friends have been begging for me to ask her out for the past month, and I've even gotten a text from her saying "so when are you gonna ask me out ". Well, I go over to her house and we got high, then she wanted to have a serious talk with me. To summarize the three hour long talk, "I can't be with you because I have to love myself first, as of right now I can't see myself being with you, I'm sorry I lead you on but I did have feelings for you, if you stick around it'll be a waste of your time, and if I ever do get these feelings back for you I'll tell you".

I'm the first person she genuinely likes, or at least that's what she says. She says she doesn't want to hurt me but this already hurts. I don't think she wants to love herself first but instead to keep talking to other guys because she enjoys it. I should've let her go the first time she rejected me, but I've at least started No-Contact.

Not sure what the question is?

So I'm confused. You didn't want her, but you did want her, but never asked her out on a date, but now you have feelings for her?

I think you're both too immature and confused to have a real relationship. Going No Contact is probably the best thing for you, but since she's at school, you're going to run into her again and maybe get high together and maybe her feelings will change again. Who knows? You should probably date as many girls as you can, hang out with your friends, and just have fun for now. There's plenty of time to get serious in the future. Most of what she told you is BS, so you can't believe it. Just distract yourself with school work, partying and hanging out. Maybe there's another girl who likes you in your group.

How do you become best friends in a couple of weeks? You don't even know one another.

Stay NC.

I think you should listen to what she is saying and move on.

You posted this in getting back together. I suppose that means you want to know how to best conduct yourself so as to get her attention back.

Easy: She has rejected you. So ignore her. Stay in no contact (if you bump into her be polite, that is all). Withdraw all your attention from her. Give it to other girls instead.

Do something to improve yourself - working out or similar.

The lack of attention from you, coupled with some self improvement will actually make you more attractive to her.

If she changes her mind, she will tell you.

This is also the best thing you can do for yourself in terms of getting over her and moving on, so if she doesn't, fine.

Win/win.

I'm the first person she genuinely likes

her giving a blowjob to another guy

Thanks for all of the replies, and I’m sorry I didn’t properly state my question. What should I do and would she even realized what she had lost. I’m still in no contact, having her blocked on all social media except text in case she actually needs to talk to me. P.S she’s already talking to to other guys :)

P.S she’s already talking to to other guys :)

How do you know that?

Our mutual friend talks to the both of us and she sometimes likes to fill me in for whatever reason. She also sits behind me in economics, and all she does is talk about this guy at work. She talks to the person next to her, saying she likes him because they have the same music taste (I was not into country music). May or may not be said to catch my attention, but at least I don’t say anything about it or act like I care.

Our mutual friend talks to the both of us and she sometimes likes to fill me in for whatever reason.

Next time mutual friend starts filling you in, tell her you aren't interested and change the subject.

Is it possible to change seats in economics, or is it a set seating plan?

Blocking on social media is very immature, just unfollow, do not cyber stalk, just unfollow.

Work on yourself, do awesome things that you will be proud of.

Next time mutual friend starts filling you in, tell her you aren't interested and change the subject.

 

Is it possible to change seats in economics, or is it a set seating plan?

I've already told everyone who DOES fill me in that I don't care for her anymore. As for seating, I can endure what she says.

Dude....

he joked about telling her friends I was her boyfriend in a very sarcastic way, and when she asked me what I wanted my future wife to be, I said, 'not you thats for sure' she felt upse

There is no way, no how she should give you a chance. She already knows that you would never choose her, so why should she bother with you? Even if you didn't want to date her, you didn't have to insult her so deeply. You could have said "hmm...I don't now, someone with a good sense of humor and who puts up with me". or any other vague statement. you dropkicked her!

I've already told everyone who DOES fill me in that I don't care for her anymore..

So why are you still listening to her?

Shut her down.