reneneyrey Posted June 26, 2017 Share Posted June 26, 2017 I connected with a girl living 4 states away. At 1st, I was flying there, 3 or 4 times. Then we mostry took turns, she flew here, then I flew there, etc. All along, we each paid our own airfare. Affordability was never a problem for either of us. We both have a lot saved up and we both make a good income. She got a good job in my town and has moved in with me now, and we were discussin how to share expenes. She said she didn't know one woman who would have paid their own airfare for the 2 years our relationship was long distance. I was surprised to hear that. What do y'all think? Link to comment
Starlight925 Posted June 26, 2017 Share Posted June 26, 2017 I think she's wrong. I have been in 2 LDR's, and both of which, I paid for mine, and he paid for his. In each LDR, the person whose city we were in paid for most of the meals and entertainment. Because we took turns visiting, it ended up pretty even. Link to comment
WombatShadow Posted June 26, 2017 Share Posted June 26, 2017 I didn't have airfare to contend with, but I never would have expected my ex to pay for my gas/mileage down to his apartment for the three years we were together, and I never would have paid for his. Is she just bringing this up as an aside, or is she using it to get you to pay more expenses? Link to comment
j.man Posted June 26, 2017 Share Posted June 26, 2017 She said she didn't know one woman who would have paid their own airfare for the 2 years our relationship was long distance Tell her she does now. Link to comment
nutbrownhare Posted June 26, 2017 Share Posted June 26, 2017 Maybe all the women she knows are spoilt little princesses...? If you can afford it, pay your own travel expenses! Link to comment
Hollyj Posted June 26, 2017 Share Posted June 26, 2017 She should have been responsible for all of her own airfare. Link to comment
Cynid Posted June 26, 2017 Share Posted June 26, 2017 I've never been in an LDR, but I would be uncomfortable having him pay for me. Link to comment
reneneyrey Posted June 26, 2017 Author Share Posted June 26, 2017 Thanks all. That's what I thought. Basically, she just doesn't like spending money. Link to comment
reinventmyself Posted June 26, 2017 Share Posted June 26, 2017 She is not your dependent, nor your child so she is responsible for her own air fare. If she didn't have a good job and couldn't afford it, where as you could, I could see you making up with difference so it's equitable at times. It shouldn't be a burden to one if it's easy for the other and no one should feel entitled. But that isn't the case here. She pays her way. Link to comment
Starlight925 Posted June 26, 2017 Share Posted June 26, 2017 I also believe in financial equality in same-city dating, unless there is a huge income disparity. I believe in trading picking up checks and splitting vacations and other expenses. So my question is: Is there a huge income disparity? Why do you think she thinks you should pick up all expenses? Link to comment
reinventmyself Posted June 26, 2017 Share Posted June 26, 2017 I do have a friend who feels the way this girlfriend does. She gives me grief when finds out that I might have paid my own way or picked up the dinner check. But . . this same friend also has a hard time finding dates Link to comment
Starlight925 Posted June 26, 2017 Share Posted June 26, 2017 I do have a friend who feels the way this girlfriend does. She gives me grief when finds out that I might have paid my own way or picked up the dinner check. But . . this same friend also has a hard time finding dates I, too, have a friend who thinks it's a "huge problem" and would never, in a million years, pull out her credit card on a date. She is 55, single, and never been married. Truth. Link to comment
TheKissOfLife Posted June 26, 2017 Share Posted June 26, 2017 I do know women like what she described but I TOTALLY disagree. I think its fair for each person to pay their own airfare unless they are going through hard times. Link to comment
Sunny23 Posted June 26, 2017 Share Posted June 26, 2017 If she made way less than you or was always the one going to you, then it would be good to split it or something. But in this situation it sounds like you should each be paying your own way. Link to comment
Viewcart Posted June 26, 2017 Share Posted June 26, 2017 When I was in a LD relationship, my ex bf payed for all my traveling as well as living expenses if I went to his place or if he comes to me. But if we go out to travel elsewhere for fun, we pay for our own tickets and he will pay for the room/board and some fun expenses. It gets expensive so I offer sometimes. Neither of us have financial issues so it wasn't a concern for us. But if you're short on $$$, then I would say pay for your own separately. Link to comment
LaHermes Posted June 26, 2017 Share Posted June 26, 2017 Dating wouldn't be so costly if people instead of looking for people light years away found someone in their own back yard, so to speak. I simply do not understand it. Link to comment
moneymkt Posted June 26, 2017 Share Posted June 26, 2017 Dating wouldn't be so costly if people instead of looking for people light years away found someone in their own back yard, so to speak. I simply do not understand it. Yeah once I noticed someone was 81 miles from me on Bumble I unmatched her lol Link to comment
Rezie Posted June 26, 2017 Share Posted June 26, 2017 I'm in LDR and me and my boyfriend both pay our own airfares. That's not even a discussion. Maybe if due to circumstances the other one was the only one able to travel to meet up then the non traveling one could contribute. Other than that if the travels go quite equal then both pay own fares. Same in close distance dating. Link to comment
Capricorn3 Posted June 27, 2017 Share Posted June 27, 2017 Each pays their own way, imo. She's got a job? Yep, she pays her own way. Link to comment
moneymkt Posted June 27, 2017 Share Posted June 27, 2017 Each pays their own way, imo. She's got a job? Yep, she pays her own way. I am trying to think how strong attraction has to be for me to catch a plane to see someone lol Link to comment
Capricorn3 Posted June 27, 2017 Share Posted June 27, 2017 I am trying to think how strong attraction has to be for me to catch a plane to see someone lol Clearly, these days half the world seems to be doing that, lol. Link to comment
moneymkt Posted June 27, 2017 Share Posted June 27, 2017 Clearly, these days half the world seems to be doing that, lol. One girl only lived 30 mins away and declined because I didn't drive lol I was surprised since we are in the Lyft and Uber era Link to comment
Sportster2005 Posted June 27, 2017 Share Posted June 27, 2017 I connected with a girl living 4 states away. At 1st, I was flying there, 3 or 4 times. Then we mostry took turns, she flew here, then I flew there, etc. All along, we each paid our own airfare. Affordability was never a problem for either of us. We both have a lot saved up and we both make a good income. She got a good job in my town and has moved in with me now, and we were discussin how to share expenes. She said she didn't know one woman who would have paid their own airfare for the 2 years our relationship was long distance. I was surprised to hear that. What do y'all think? I'd put her back on a plane with a one way ticket. Link to comment
j.man Posted June 27, 2017 Share Posted June 27, 2017 I'd put her back on a plane with a one way ticket.On Spirit Airlines, too. Link to comment
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