How to address my roommate/cat issue?

So my roommate and I both live in an apartment complex and we both own a cat. We are equally lazy at trimming their claws, and a couple weeks ago her cat left a giant scratch on my leg by accident.

This upcoming week the landlords are inspecting rooms, and she told me upfront that she saw my cat scratching up the sides of one of the couches and that I would need to pay for it. I was drunk when she mentioned it so I foolishly agreed.

Upon further inspection and thought, I saw other scratches in different areas of the couch and I think it's BS to assume it was 100% my cat. Ive never seen her cat scratch the couches, but Ive never seen mine do it either.

How should I tell her I don't plan to pay for the entire couch without a fight? (Since it'll be my word vs hers when its time to pay)

It may seem like an obvious answer (just assert yourself) but I feel like she'll fight it pretty hard

Sadly, if you have pets, and you have clauses in the lease that mean you have to pay for pet damage, then you have to do it. Even a few scratches on a couch can lead to cushions or arms bursting open, greatly reducing the lifespan of the couch.

If the cat is hers, then she needs to pay for the couch. Just tell her what the landlord said, that the cat has damaged the couch and hence since the cat is hers, she is liable for the damage and it is not fair to expect you to do it since it is not your cat.

But if she digs in and refuses, be prepared to lose your security deposit because the landlord is within their rights to keep it because your name is on the lease as well. Sadly, you can't MAKE her pay, and the only recourse if she refuses is to take her to small claims court to try to get your security deposit back because she is the owner of the cat.

Sometimes you just have to write off these kinds of losses. This is one reason I stopped living with roommates after i got out of college, because I got sick of all the hassles and expense some of them end up costing you. Even people that you think are good friends can turn out to be a pain in the butt when you share a place with them, and many can be quite stingy with money and selfish.

So if you can't convince her, just write it off and next time don't get a roommate who has a cat, because cats are actually quite commonly the cause of losing security deposits because they destroy things with their claws and also if they urinate or spray in the house, the smell is such the landlord usually has to replace all the carpets and sometimes even the plywood under the carpets depending on how bad the damage is.

So you're lucky you don't have to pay for that as well. Next time don't share with a roommate who has a cat, or live alone if you can!

Sorry I should have made myself more clear, I own a cat and she owns a different cat. The debate is over whose cat scratched the couches (she says its mine, I say its both)

I would simply leave it as you both share the apartment, you both have cats, and you both have equal responsibility in this. Avoiding conflict makes conflict worse in the furture. State your opinion and let it set in. It's business in this situation, you can't worry about feelings. If you try to keep it kind right now, you'll only set yourself up for a blow up in the future as you build your feelings that you are being taken advantage of.

The debate is over whose cat scratched the couches (she says its mine, I say its both)

She said it was yours because she said that she SAW your cat scratching the couch. She witnessed it and you said you agreed to pay for it. I know you said you were drunk, but that was the situation at the time and I think you should stand by it.

Oh, you both own cats... and your cat has been seen scratching the couch? Welll, you're kind of busted there. You are liable for the couch, and if your roommate's cat also scratches she should split the cost. But if you've never seen her cat scratching the couch and yours does, then unfortunately you should pay for it all.

She said it was yours because she said that she SAW your cat scratching the couch. She witnessed it and you said you agreed to pay for it. I know you said you were drunk, but that was the situation at the time and I think you should stand by it.

Normally I'd agree, but I noticed more scratches in other areas the following day. She said she saw Athena (my cat) scratching the side of one of the chairs. The next day I found scratches on the arms of both that same chair and the couch. And since her cat scratched my leg pretty badly its really unlikely it was completely my cat.

Drinking aside, I'm terrible at standing up for myself which I think was more so the issue. I still don't think I should pay several hundred bucks all myself (that's what it costs) if her cat also contributed

Oh, you both own cats... and your cat has been seen scratching the couch? Welll, you're kind of busted there. You are liable for the couch, and if your roommate's cat also scratches she should split the cost. But if you've never seen her cat scratching the couch and yours does, then unfortunately you should pay for it all.

I've never seen hers or mine do it. For all I know shes making up seeing Athena do it (doubt she would do that but who knows, its pretty expensive).

Also, even if I do pay for the side of the one chair, I doubt the arm scratches are solely from my cat

I still don't think I should pay several hundred bucks all myself (that's what it costs) if her cat also contributed

You don't KNOW that her cat did. You never actually saw it or witnessed her cat scratching the couch. She DID witness YOUR cat doing it. You also stated that her cat scratched you "by accident" and that has nothing to do with your cat scratching the couch.

You don't KNOW that her cat did. You never actually saw it or witnessed her cat scratching the couch. She DID witness YOUR cat doing it. You also stated that her cat scratched you "by accident" and that has nothing to do with your cat scratching the couch.

My point about her cat scratching me is that her cat's nails are easily sharp enough to scratch the couch accidentally as well. My roommate witnessed the sides of the chair being scratched but said nothing about the couch or arms.

Ok, I give up. Not sure why you ask the questions and then argue all the way.

Ok, I give up. Not sure why you ask the questions and then argue all the way.

I was simply pointing out that her cat scratching me was relevant to the couch. My question was about how to tell her I'm splitting the cost, not whether or not we should. Thanks for your input though

I think it is logical that both cats scratch things. Even if you agreed to pay for the chair - there is other damage in the house as I understood. And it should be payed. And you both have cats that equally can scratch couches/chairs or what not.

Also, buy a freaking scratching post for your cats and trim their claws.

Is there a way to pay just for the damages she saw your cat do?

I think it is logical that both cats scratch things. Even if you agreed to pay for the chair - there is other damage in the house as I understood. And it should be payed. And you both have cats that equally can scratch couches/chairs or what not.

Also, buy a freaking scratching post for your cats and trim their claws.

They have a scratching post lol but yes I will be much better about trimming her nails after this!

I think you have to pay for it because you promised (when you choose to drink you choose the consequences IMO).

Is there a way to pay just for the damages she saw your cat do?

I don't think so, they charge per individual piece of messed up furniture. So they'd either send the full price to one of us or half to us both

You can always ask her if she would be willing to split the cost, but in this case since you clearly remember (although you were drunk) that you said you would pay for it, if you want to be the type of person that would want to follow through on your word, I would pay for it. Normally I would say you both have cats, you both pay for the damage if it was clearly cat damage but not overly clear whose cat it was and you can't agree who is going to pay for it. In your case though my word would have been important to me, more important than the money for the damage deposit.

I think you have to pay for it because you promised (when you choose to drink you choose the consequences IMO).

Even for the other piece of furniture? I agree its fair I pay for the chair since I already agreed to but she said nothing about the couch

You can always ask her if she would be willing to split the cost, but in this case since you clearly remember (although you were drunk) that you said you would pay for it, if you want to be the type of person that would want to follow through on your word, I would pay for it. Normally I would say you both have cats, you both pay for the damage if it was clearly cat damage but not overly clear whose cat it was and you can't agree who is going to pay for it. In your case though my word would have been important to me, more important than the money for the damage deposit.

So I should pay for both the chair and couch? We only discussed the chair (which I agree I should pay for)

Just pay the one you agreed to. There's no way of knowing whose cat damaged the other piece of furniture.

Look you both are responsible for it. You need to both share the damage, make it clear to your flatmate that you are not going to pay for all the pet damage when both of you own a pet each. It doesn't really matter who saw which cat do what. You said there are more than one damages which no one knows which cat has done it. It makes perfect sense that you share.

If she can not agree to this then find a new flatmate. There will be nore troubles in the future.

Even if you trim a cat's nails they will still scratch things. The only way to totally prevent scratching is to remove the nails entirely (a barbaric procedure that no one should endorse).

Look, regardless of whether you are in the right or not, this is a question of neither of you being able to prove exactly who did the damage. In theory, if you are both decent people, since you both own cats, you should split the cost. But if she is selfish or in a position where she is not on the lease and hence it is your security deposit and not hers, then you'll just have to suck it up and pay the cost because you can't legally make her pay if you can't prove it was only her cat doing the damage (or doing half of it).

If you did split the security deposit, then just tell the landlord to take the cost out by taking your security deposit. That in essence forces her to pay half because she can't make you reimburse her for what was lost to the landlord on the security deposit.

Consider it a lesson learned. Cats are destructive of furniture and you need to get your cat a scratching post and work with her to get her to not scratch furniture and only her post, or else get your own furniture where you don't care about it. Just trimming her nails won't prevent damage, so she needs to be trained to use acceptable things to scratch rather than the furniture.

This is kind of ridiculous. you both have cats.

Do you guys have scratch posts for the cats? Maybe think about getting one?

Make a point to her that cats do these things and you both have a cat so it's NOT all your cats doing.

You are both equally responsible for any pet damage, because unless you keep a hidden camera or your roommate keeps her cat in her room all the time then come on, both the cats are scratching the furniture. If one of them does it the other one WILL follow suit and do likewise.

Suggest in addition to clipping their claws you both look at how to get the cats to use scratching posts, but yeah this is on likely on both of your cats and not just one. Your kitty is just the one who got caught. Can you tell the roommate the landlord has noticed cat damage to the furniture and reminded you that you both will need to pay for any damage without getting into a he said/she said/your cat/my cat type situation? Presumably you both knew this would likely happen.