Viper55666 Posted February 27, 2009 Share Posted February 27, 2009 Day 3 Died a little more inside today! Having thoughts about her and replaying things/conversations in my head. Don't know whether I'm just being paranoid or what but I'm thinking something just doesn't add up! Going out tonight, gonna get absolutely wasted and then hibernate for the weekend. Link to comment
BrokenheartUK Posted February 27, 2009 Share Posted February 27, 2009 Day 25 Today has been okay so far, of course I've been thinking of her and I hate that it's the weekend as I know exactly what she'll be up to with her new boyfriend. But tonight I'm going round a friend's house for steak and a movie, then tomorrow night I'm going out on the town. Just gotta keep on keeping on... Link to comment
SighSob Posted February 27, 2009 Share Posted February 27, 2009 you know what i realized. that even if we [let me just talk from me only] 'i' never want to talk to my ex again. glad to be moving on with my life, finally, i can't lie. i'm a little upset that he hasn't contacted me. i guess his new lady is enough for him. i mean i just want to be able to not pick up the phone or not answer his text. but he's not giving me the chance. hmph. lol ok ok that does seem a little childish. i take it back. lol. It's not childish. I think ego has a lot to do with the fact that dumpees obsess over their ex's. I would like my ex to beg for me back, I do really want her to do it, just to reject her. Still, it's not just about "revenge". If she came back to me, it would mean that what we had was indeed something good/special, which is something I'm starting to question and ultimately don't want to. Link to comment
SighSob Posted February 27, 2009 Share Posted February 27, 2009 Day 25 Today has been okay so far, of course I've been thinking of her and I hate that it's the weekend as I know exactly what she'll be up to with her new boyfriend. But tonight I'm going round a friend's house for steak and a movie, then tomorrow night I'm going out on the town. Just gotta keep on keeping on... Yup exactly. Weekends are the best and the worst part of the week to me. I enjoy the great times I have with my buddies & the girls, then again I start to wonder what she and her boyfriend are up to and it does make me a little...disappointed? It's not really sadness, it's more like something irritating... Link to comment
montgomery Posted February 27, 2009 Share Posted February 27, 2009 back to day 1. I didn't crack: we ran into each other on the tube. there was a bit of small talk, then she offered something of an apology for a few things, with an explanation that I didn't get, but seemed to make sense to her. I was in a hell of a state afterwards, but I actually feel much better today. I think it was cathartic. I'd been bottling a lot up. I even feel that a bit more talking might help. things still aren't straight between us. and hardcore NC is so exhausting and unnatural when we have to be around each other all the time. oh, man. it's so confusing. Link to comment
BrokenheartUK Posted February 27, 2009 Share Posted February 27, 2009 Yup exactly. Weekends are the best and the worst part of the week to me. I enjoy the great times I have with my buddies & the girls, then again I start to wonder what she and her boyfriend are up to and it does make me a little...disappointed? It's not really sadness, it's more like something irritating... Those feelings are of anger, jealousy and resentment for me, I'm ashamed to say. Anger and jealousy at the fact that she is getting something we used to have with somebody new, while I have to take 'time out' of relationships to be alone and work on myself. And resentment that she has managed to move on so quickly to a new love while I am still stuck in purgatory. It's just sour grapes really, she has a right to do whatever makes her happy and I'm just feeling sorry for myself. I just have to keep reminding myself that in about a year or two I will be ten times the person I am right now and an even better catch for my next girl. Link to comment
lauramed Posted February 27, 2009 Share Posted February 27, 2009 Well back to day 1. He called me last night and like a fool I answered the phone. Slapping myself silly today for that blunder. Wants to see me this weekend. I'm willing to talk to him but he's not going to just worm his way back into my life without proving to me that he deserves me. Lot of questions that have to be answered and he's not going to find that weak, pathetic women that I was before. I did a lot thinking about this last night. I finally realized just how powerful NC really is. Sure it's been painful....lots of tears, probably more than he deserves, and times that I didn't think I would be able to make it without him but I'm still here. These 3 months have made me realize just how strong I am and that as much as I want him back in my life, I don't need him there and I won't die without him. You know that saying..."what doesn't kill you makes you stronger". I finally have me back!!! Link to comment
philove Posted February 27, 2009 Share Posted February 27, 2009 Day 8 - I survived a night out without even thinking about my ex so I think I'm coming along fine I received a lot of attention from a few girls so that naturally made me feel better Link to comment
coldheart Posted February 27, 2009 Share Posted February 27, 2009 Day 1 - Reading this thread and several forums here are making me feel alot better. I am a breakup veteran but every time hurts like it's the first. Link to comment
ToodlePip Posted February 27, 2009 Share Posted February 27, 2009 Day 8. We both work for the same company and both face redundancy. Did think of contacting her to find out how things were going but throught better of it. She'll probably think I don't care and am a horrible person, but she hasn't contacted me either! Link to comment
rayah Posted February 27, 2009 Share Posted February 27, 2009 I just have to keep reminding myself that in about a year or two I will be ten times the person I am right now and an even better catch for my next girl. This is sooo true! Link to comment
Ixtapa Posted February 27, 2009 Share Posted February 27, 2009 Still thinking but not feeling too bad now. For some reason I think he will come to his senses and come back to me at some point (even if it's not the case, thinking that now helps me get through the days). Whatever happens happens...I need to move on with my life in any case. Link to comment
Skinman Posted February 27, 2009 Share Posted February 27, 2009 Day 1 for me.... I read the whole thread about Relationship with X the Walkaway wife Club and saw my story... After close to 16 years together my wife in October told me she no longer loved me and to move out... Broke my heart to say the least along with destroying my family at the same time.. it been for months now but I still find it difficult dealing with her in regards to my daughter... she has moved on and found another to play house with........ So this is for me so I can move on and realize that I will be much happier and healthier without her.... Link to comment
sad_panda Posted February 27, 2009 Share Posted February 27, 2009 Day 76 today! I stopped counting a few weeks ago, but I decided to check how long it has been when I saw this cute, funny, and bittersweet lolrus (walrus version of lolcat): link removed It's amazing I found that picture today of all days, by coincidence, while I was mindlessly surfing the net. Link to comment
brazilgirl21 Posted February 27, 2009 Share Posted February 27, 2009 Day 11 - I don't feel too good but I know that I will get through this and be a stronger person because of it. Link to comment
rayah Posted February 28, 2009 Share Posted February 28, 2009 DAY 2 Yayyyy Im so proud of myself...I am on day two and i'm feeling fine. i do still think of him. like some things may remind me of him or us and i just laugh about it. i still cant watch sex scenes in movies though lol. but most of the time i just think a) im glad im moving on from such a loser that never loved me, cuz if he loved me he wouldnt have used me and b) it was fun while it lasted. i'm not one of those people that can be angry for a long time. i guess its a good thing in this situation, but dont get it twisted...i would NEVER date him again. also, i dont speak about him much either. his mom and me and sis are still tight, but we have our own r-ships, and i dont mention him and i pray to goodness they dont mention him lol. the thing is [i know new ppl are reading my thread and is like wow shes only on day 2 and feeling so great, now this is day 2 of no contact, we've been broken up SEVEN months [today]] i know that im an AWESOME woman, in all aspects. its really his loss. so why mourn something that is sooo outta your control. i like to think of it like this, "God closes some doors so better ones can open." Link to comment
redreine Posted February 28, 2009 Share Posted February 28, 2009 I'm not sure what day it is...I think 3. I am doing fine with not having the urge to talk to him or look at his facebook/myspace/dating profile. I haven't had any urges to call him, or even talk to his sisters or his friends (all on my facebook) I had a date last night, and I feel so awkward around guys that aren't him. He's all I think about, and it takes everything in me not to talk about him. A little girl at the youth group I help run told me she saw my boyfriend recently, and I didn't have the heart to correct her. As a matter of fact, my immediate thought was, "He'll be my boyfriend again later anyway, so making the correction doesn't matter". I know our relationship will never work until we both make some changes. That's why I told him we can't be together now, and he knows we can't be together either...although he doesn't think he needs to change, as far as I know. There is just something that has always told me that we were meant to be together, forever. That he's "The One". But today...that feeling started to fade. Link to comment
and again Posted February 28, 2009 Share Posted February 28, 2009 Broke 5 weeks nc last night no reply as yet, dont feel to bad about it at momment, i didnt grovel, so not to ashamed, left the door a jar a bit so at momment ok 5 out of 10 Link to comment
ToodlePip Posted February 28, 2009 Share Posted February 28, 2009 Day 10. Went out to watch the rugby last night and met a girl who is recently out of a relationship - chatted and mightbe something worth pursuing as I do not want anything serious right now. Ex still in back of my mind but acceptance is sinking in. Link to comment
Viper55666 Posted February 28, 2009 Share Posted February 28, 2009 Day 1... For the 20th time!!! Like a idiot I text her in a drunken moment of madness last night, NO REPLY!. Feeling really low today, not because I broke NC but because I really miss her. Its been almost 3 months now and it still feels like It happened yesterday! Wish I could stop thinking about her just for one day! Link to comment
rebelfac Posted February 28, 2009 Share Posted February 28, 2009 Day 1 for me.... I read the whole thread about Relationship with X the Walkaway wife Club and saw my story... After close to 16 years together my wife in October told me she no longer loved me and to move out... Broke my heart to say the least along with destroying my family at the same time.. it been for months now but I still find it difficult dealing with her in regards to my daughter... she has moved on and found another to play house with........ So this is for me so I can move on and realize that I will be much happier and healthier without her.... Hello Skinman, The same thing happened to me. After 12 years my wife moved out with our twelve year old daughter and into a guys house. This also happedned 4 months ago in October and it's so hard to understand. What do you thiink you did wrong? One of the things I did was not show love and affection and he is doing that and everything right in order to land her. I still want her back eventually but am trying to preserve a friendship in the meantime. She was the perfect wife and was good to me which is why I don't hate her for doing this/cheating. It is so hard feeling so easily replaced. Link to comment
JohnGalt Posted February 28, 2009 Share Posted February 28, 2009 Hello Skinman, The same thing happened to me. After 12 years my wife moved out with our twelve year old daughter and into a guys house. This also happedned 4 months ago in October and it's so hard to understand. What do you thiink you did wrong? One of the things I did was not show love and affection and he is doing that and everything right in order to land her. I still want her back eventually but am trying to preserve a friendship in the meantime. She was the perfect wife and was good to me which is why I don't hate her for doing this/cheating. It is so hard feeling so easily replaced. no she wasn't, man. You're just hurt right now. Get her off that pedestal. You deserve a woman who will stay true to her vows and not disrespect you by only leaving when she has another. Link to comment
TLguy Posted February 28, 2009 Share Posted February 28, 2009 I dont know what day it is...but Im going strong. My birthdays next month and I hope she doesnt contact me...one because its on the 29th day of my new NC and two it will make me feel down. Maybe in a month it wont affect me. Heres to hoping. Woo Saturday! Link to comment
rebelfac Posted February 28, 2009 Share Posted February 28, 2009 Hey John Do you think that she can sense that I am not over her and perhaps that until I actually am she won't find me appealing enough to miss me or ever consider me again? My friends have told me that as soon as I find someone else I will forget about her. She has an exceptional personality and it just isn't fair that this new guy who helped sway her gets to see my daughter every day as well. Sometimes this seems like a bad dream that I haven't waken up from. Link to comment
JohnGalt Posted February 28, 2009 Share Posted February 28, 2009 Hey John Do you think that she can sense that I am not over her and perhaps that until I actually am she won't find me appealing enough to miss me or ever consider me again? My friends have told me that as soon as I find someone else I will forget about her. She has an exceptional personality and it just isn't fair that this new guy who helped sway her gets to see my daughter every day as well. Sometimes this seems like a bad dream that I haven't waken up from. Hey buddy, Don't you worry about it. I would be cordial to her so that you can continue to see your daughter and so there's no conflict. I would also make it explicit that you're not going to wait for her forever. You should very politely let her know that you are committed to your marriage, take your vows seriously and will work on the problems you were having, but that you will not wait for her forever. Let her know that you will not be a safety net to pick up the pieces if the two of them do not work out. Tell her she needs to reach deep within herself and make some tough decisions and think about the far-reaching consequences of those decisions. Then, give her some space. After that, whenever you're around her, look happy. Get into the gym. Work out. Save a little of your money and buy some new clothes. Get yourself something you've always wanted. Start casually dating again. Look man, the reality of the situation is this. This new guy is not going to be any better than you were. She's just in that honeymoon stage. Who knows how long that'll last? In the meantime, just realize that you didn't deserve this and commit yourself to working on any issues you have, doing stuff you enjoy, and date around. Who knows, maybe you'll find the next perfect woman Link to comment
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