kb109 Posted September 13, 2006 Share Posted September 13, 2006 ok so my boyfriend and i both have myspace accounts and even though i totally trust him, i can't stand all these slutty girls adding him and trying to talk to him. yes, i know i'm being jealous and insecure but it just sounds like unnecessary drama to me. i have many friends that have had relationship problems because of this stupid drama site. can anyone relate to this?? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ImThatGirl Posted September 13, 2006 Share Posted September 13, 2006 I don't like it either. Still keep my account - check it daily - to see what new messages his old "friend" and his best friends wife have left. Something about having the ability to publicize emotions. Shouldn't some things be discussed in private? I know he's not interested in the old friend. I'm not exactly jealous but it's still bothersome....! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rose2summer Posted September 13, 2006 Share Posted September 13, 2006 I have seen myspace become problematic for many on ENA, I think if it is used properly, it can be a great tool to stay in touch with friends, I have a myspace account, but I keep everything on it very private, And will only add people that I know already, With regards to your bf, express to him about how you feel about him having these woman contacting/adding him, If he's not understanding that it bothers you, Then I would be very concerned, I would avoid checking up on him though unless you have reason for suspicion. Hugs, Rose Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shorty20 Posted September 13, 2006 Share Posted September 13, 2006 I know what you mean. It's kind of hard when both people in the relationship have a myspace because then you're always going on each other's sites analyizing everyone that leaves them comments or is on their friends. Then you worry about why you're not on his top 8 or why you're not number one on his friends list, or why he hasn't changed his relationship status... it's all stupid. I have a myspace, my fiance dosen't. It causes too much drama and worry over nothing! If you both have a myspace don't get too crazy with it, stalking him on there. Just don't take it so seriously... it's myspace, come on. Just talk yourself out of getting all jealous and crazy over it, but I can relate to you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Closure Posted September 13, 2006 Share Posted September 13, 2006 I don't get the whole myspace thing. I don't have it. All that effort for folks you're never going to meet seems like a waste of time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mattie Posted September 13, 2006 Share Posted September 13, 2006 I know the feeling all too well. There's nothing worse than a paranoid trip because somebody left a comment saying: "Hey babe. How are you? xxx". I know it's nothing, but it really upsets me sometimes. But, I've realised that it's down to me and how I feel about myself. That said, what you could try and do is imagine things being the other way around. By that I mean, if you got a comment from somebody that was flirty you would still talk to that person right? My girlfriend is hot and gets a lot of attention on MySpace, but at the end of the day, she's with me and that's all there is to it. Believe it or not, MySpace isn't the world. Although, Rupert Murdoch is working on that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ImThatGirl Posted September 13, 2006 Share Posted September 13, 2006 kb - For the most part, I consider my bf's Myspace comments as humor. (The ones from his friends) I don't get all jealous but it can make you wonder. . . And yes, I went through the "why hasn't he changed status." EEwww I hated it for a bit. We weren't really telling everyone we were dating for awhile so there was no mention of me until recently. It just makes me curious. I think I'm making a rule that I'm not allowed to log on for two days. lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kb109 Posted September 13, 2006 Author Share Posted September 13, 2006 i know!! my bf's status still says single and he says its because hes been lazy and its been like that as long as he's had myspace. i'm just afraid he's ashamed of me or he wants to appear available for the girls on myspace. this is so stupid and i hate overanalyzing like this! but we talked about how i changed my status to "in a relationship" today so i hope he does too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Beec Posted September 13, 2006 Share Posted September 13, 2006 Do you think it's only myspace? Do you think that men and women won't hit on your man or woman at any time place or manner? Yes, it will happen. It's not myspace, it's people. Make sure you can trust your man or woman, and work on keeping them happy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ImThatGirl Posted September 13, 2006 Share Posted September 13, 2006 Lol - My bf is 30 and I'm 28. We just didn't want to broadcast that we were dating or even change our status to in a relationship for awhile. His old "friend" constantly comments about how he's not returning her calls, standing her up for a wedding, that he must be preoccupied with someone, that he must be with his friend of the week. I eventually changed my status to "in a rel." And changed my header to "one who has his heart.." A day later he changed his stat and his header to "have to say it's true." All of this so darned juvenile! One of his other friends has since posted a comment "I think he's busy with: (my picture) So I've heard." No new comments for the past few days. I think ultimately it's a matter of how each person handles it. How old is your bf and how long have you been together? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Day_Walker Posted September 13, 2006 Share Posted September 13, 2006 This sounds like the old situation where people say that they trust their significant other but they dont trust the other person. What it really means is that you dont trust your boyfriend. You have to take myspace for what it is and that is a social networking website, people do send out random friend requests just to satisfy their need to have too many "friends." I dont think you need to be concerned about about these supposed "slutty" girls and if you are concerned about them then your bf is giving you a reason to be jealous. If the latter happens to be the case, then he probably isnt the guy for you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
southerngirl Posted September 13, 2006 Share Posted September 13, 2006 I have a myspace account. I dont use it that much. Really I only login like once a week or if someones left me a comment I will go to see what it is. My page is pretty generic its not too personal, just has a little bit of info I wouldnt care if a stranger knew. In fact, so many strangers see it sometimes I wonder about the other pages and just why they do get so personal. I have debated deleting it but since I listed myself at my old highschool alumni, people add me randomly, ones I havent heard from in upwards to 10 years... (1996 grad here) so for that reason I keep it. One friend comes to mind, she moved away with her family senior year and I hadnt talked to her again.. I sure did miss her, she'd been a friend since we were children. She contacted me and since then we have caught up quite a bit! I think if its used for good purposes having myspace can be fine. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Batya33 Posted September 13, 2006 Share Posted September 13, 2006 I would question the character and sincerity of a person who was in a relationship yet kept a myspace profile public or accessible to those who would think it appropriate to add these comments and/or someone who wouldn't automatically delete those comments (i.e. delete them because of course even with all precautions that can happen) or block the person. I can sort of understand why a person in his or her 20's would want to keep a myspace account even if there is a significant other but there are ways to restrict access and if this is not being done I would question the person's character. I have a myspace account - there is no photo, it is private, it says I'm in a relationship and I have it to make sure that my two young nieces are staying safe and appropriate on myspace. They link to my profile. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hosswhispra Posted September 13, 2006 Share Posted September 13, 2006 Myspace is kinda addicting....that's what I have found out. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ImThatGirl Posted September 13, 2006 Share Posted September 13, 2006 And the truth comes out, eh? Myspace addicting... I'm not addicted, I'm not addicted, I'm not addicted! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AntiLove_SuperStar Posted September 13, 2006 Share Posted September 13, 2006 I do not think my boyfriend has a Myspace. But if he did, I know I wouldn't check it. I can't bear to think he could have a standing advertisement going for a replacement, if you get me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AwdreeHpburn Posted September 13, 2006 Share Posted September 13, 2006 huh-huh huh myspace.... lol yeh, I have one too. Soooooooo ridiculously anonymous I think it defeats the purpose but it's almost just as ridiculous to NOT have one. Honestly tho - I don't get it. What is it - REALLY? I don't mean what is it marketed as, what is it REALLY?? Seems to me its someone's clever idea for making a lot of money. There's a butt load of advertising going on, companies have myspace accounts now.... I don't get it's purpose. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Momene Posted September 14, 2006 Share Posted September 14, 2006 I sometimes network online because I don't have friends in real life. I talk to people on here and those I've met on Faceparty/MySpace and the BBC site.# My wife is an addict compared to me. Whilst I do sometimes worry about some of the messages as we've had some insecure times recently, if either/both of us went out a lot more, infidelity would be more accessible. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
g44 Posted September 14, 2006 Share Posted September 14, 2006 everything... i have a profile on myspace that i use just to promote my music with...i have no idea what my profile says because i am not there to hook up with someone online...in fact, i don't even remember my passwords and stuff or if it is even up there! lol myspace is kinda silly... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Momene Posted September 14, 2006 Share Posted September 14, 2006 everything... i have a profile on myspace that i use just to promote my music with...i have no idea what my profile says because i am not there to hook up with someone online...in fact, i don't even remember my passwords and stuff or if it is even up there! lol myspace is kinda silly... In theory yes, we should all be an open book to our partners but life isn't always 100% like that. Some things are difficult to talk about or you have to choose the right time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
librarychick Posted September 14, 2006 Share Posted September 14, 2006 While I believe myspace is stupid, it did help me collect evidence that my ex husband was cheating on me. His girlfriend has a page and had posted pictures fo them and made several comments about her and "her man". How stupid can you be to post pictures of you and your married boyfriend?! She had made comments on friends pages about how long they'd ben together and trips they were planning. It was like hiring a PI without having to pay anyone! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Japanfreak05 Posted September 14, 2006 Share Posted September 14, 2006 OMG the same thing happened to me 2 days ago lol. Yea we both have accounts too, and i was just looking at his. he changed his top 8 now it's like mostly girls. Already i'm like WTC so I look at their profiles. And one picture had a comment from him. it was like "no, that is sexy that is the sh*t" I got soooo mad. I didn't want to be mad, cuz it's stupid myspace. but still, don't call other girls sexy. he explained it (got to love boy explinations). He was responding to a comment she left on his picture about his car being sexy. he was referring to her motorcycle not her (whatever lol). Just think of it this way. you've got to be on his top 8 right? if your not #1 your close to it right? and there's no other girl in front of you right? so dont be upset. He probably doesn't even talk to thoes stutty girls. he's with you not them. Stupid myspace tho, most girls have slutty pictures, to attract guys, but they also have like a million friends, i don't think they'd take the time to talk to all of them. so don't worry. Even tho I know I was mad too at first. Gotta love the female intuition too. But as long as he calls you everyday, he's with you or you know where he's at, don't worry. be happy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rmpavlock Posted September 15, 2006 Share Posted September 15, 2006 The guy I'm seeing now has a myspace account, but he doesn't use it. There have a been a couple girls who have made comments on his page, but it doesn't bother me all that much. We haven't been dating for very long, so I'm not going to worry about it now. He's never on there anyway. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kb109 Posted September 15, 2006 Author Share Posted September 15, 2006 well my bf logs on there several times daily..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Batya33 Posted September 15, 2006 Share Posted September 15, 2006 Look, it is up to you to decide what is your comfort level when it comes to this. I would not be comfortable with it but that shouldn't affect what you think. And, just because myspace is so popular doesn't mean you have to put up with what goes on with your boyfriend's profile. I would not like to have other women posting on my boyfriend's profile where he would allow that to happen if the comments were sexual in nature. I would find it inappropriate and it would make me wonder about his values and his respect of me - and inconsistent with being in a committed romantic relationship. But, seriously, that's just me and it's up to the couple to figure out what is in their comfort zone. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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