Do you really date the people you think are drop dead gorgeous??

[xcountryprincess]

I was having a discussion with my friend and i noticed that most people we know aren't actually in relationships with drop dead gorgeous people. We crush on them, or discuss how hot certain people are but when it comes to relationships my friends honestly aren't with the best looking people on earth. In fact they don't look that good at all.

 

My friend firmly believes that people don't pursue thoes they think are drop dead gorgeous as they don't think they'll have a chance, thats why my friends aren't going after and dating the people that are amazingly hott.

 

Do you agree, do you not persue someone if you think they're hott, but if you think they're approachable?

[SarCareBear]

i've read somewhere that we usually take to dating people who are roughly as attractive as we are, which makes sense, because it's not intimidating or like you're looking down/up at them, hotness-wise.

 

looks, like lots of stuff in nature, work on a bell curve, meaning a tiny portion of people are really "ugly", a tiny portion are super "hot", and everyone else falls somewhere in the middle.

 

in the end, the hotties are nice to look at, but you can obviously have a satisfying relationship with anyone.

[Aschleigh]

My boyfriend is always telling me how beautiful I am.

How to say this delicately: I model, I keep in shape. I am used to men saying I am beautiful but mostly it means nothing if they just see the outside and never see any inner beauty. Usually they says it becuase they want something from me and I have learned to ignore it.

My boyfriend knows me inside and out and still says I am beautiful, that means something to me.

I think he is handsome and adorable. I also think there are more important things than that about him.

I think looks are not as important to women.

I think women in general , me for sure, want someone to love us and who can be relied on in difficult times.

I see many beautiful women with homely men. But if he makes her happy, why wouldn't she be with him.

I definitely suggest approaching beautiful women, they are people. We get lonely, we want company, we want to be loved. If you offer those things , chances are she will appriciate it.

[robowarrior]

There was a large audiance with men in this talkshow where they all had to pick their 'girl of preference' , on girl was dead gorgeous and the other 'plain' (although that's already horrbile thing to say, just for examples sake)

 

When the poll was completed the results where as following.

 

Most men would have wanted the gorgeous woman for sex, but when it came to a serious relationship they said they would prefer to marry the 'plain' person.

 

The reason behind this was that if they had married the gorgeous woman as a partner they would continuesly feel afraid that other guys in need of sex would interfere with their relationship wanting to have sex so that the girl was tempted to cheat and have sex with other men behind their backs.

 

In other words a less attractive woman poses less 'threats' in their relationship.

 

Although of course it was just a vote, i thought it displayed nicely why guys still prefer more 'normal' woman above dead gorgeos ones.

[hosswhispra]

They may/could look like quasi-moto to everyone else.

 

What is important is that ***I*** see them as being drop dead gorgeous in my eyes.

 

When it comes to my honey, It's only my eyes that count!

[Luck of the Irish]

How to say this delicately: I model, I keep in shape. I am used to men saying I am beautiful but mostly it means nothing if they just see the outside and never see any inner beauty. Usually they says it becuase they want something from me

 

I definitely suggest approaching beautiful women, they are people. We get lonely, we want company, we want to be loved.

 

Thank you for gracing us with your humble presense. I feel enlightened.

 

 

[BBHFutureAllAmerican]

over the summer we (me and my aau teammates) go out to clubs and stuff and i ask them out on a date if i'm gonna be in that city for a few weeks n of course keep in touch when i'm gone so i'd have to say yes if it's that but the girls here tell me i'm too intimidating but i'm not that bad of a guy

[CarnelianButterfly]

I'm in a field where there are very few women, less than 20%. There was a new girl in the department, she was very pretty and friendly. None of the guys would talk to her. They would all talk about "The Red Head" and how hot she was and how much they enjoyed watching her. I talked to her and got to know her, she was a very fun person, but was SOO lonely because none one would talk to her. I was with my guy friends at dinner one night and they kept going on about "The Red Head" this, "The Red Head" that, and on and on, I got so angry I yelled at them "SHE HAS A NAME!!!" They had reduced her to some show piece and it was so horrible for them to be talking about a person like that. They still don't talk to her and its been about 2 years, I personally think they're all a bunch of little boys.

[AntiLove_SuperStar]

When I met my BF for the first time, I wasn't sure he'd be interested in me as he was

 

a) 3.5 years older

b) VERY hot

 

But .... I persued him anyway. Because he was, if nothing else, polite and I knew he'd reject me nicely if he was going to.

 

And you know what?

 

When we'd been together for a couple of months, he said HE was staggered I was interested in HIM, because he considered ME "waaay out of my league".

 

So....just go for it.

[TheRedQueen]

What a blessing and a curse, to be considered drop dead gorgeous. Actually it would probably be more of a curse, to be caged in like that and admired from such a distance.

[Batya33]

Reading your post made me relieved that I am past that point of seeing any relevance in "hot men" -my friends rarely mention how "hot" a man is or crush on "hot" guys - once in a blue moon it will come up in connection with a celebrity but it is a passing remark. I care about looks though - I need to be proud of who I am with and part of that has to do with looks - he has to carry himself in a confident way, be friendly/warm looking and have a clean cut look. I prefer to be the better looking one because I agree that men are more visual.

 

Sure, I can go weak in the knees if I meet someone "hot" - but what I find in general is that all relationships have trade offs - my essential criteria have a lot more to do with values, character, intelligence and wit than with looks so I am willing to compromise on looks. I don't relate much to women who go on and on about their boyfriend's physical attributes. I am far more proud to be with someone who is charming, warm, genuine and intelligent than "hot" looking.

[Anna.]

You speak of only external beauty. Spiritual beauty is far more beautiful than some people realize, it's more eternal than physical beauty as well.

 

It's nice to have pleasing things to look at, but it's better to have someone who connects with your soul for a life partner.

[MacGyverRI]

I definitely suggest approaching beautiful women, they are people. We get lonely, we want company, we want to be loved. If you offer those things , chances are she will appriciate it.

 

 

A friend of mine is a former Miss RI USA and she is gorgeous but very down to earth and probably is every guys dream girl since she has all the qualities needed. BTW, she's married now

 

If you approach them one on one (compatibilities, interests etc.) and not as a trophy they will respect that more.

 

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, one persons beautiful is another's "I'll pass". The "Girl next door" look is what most guys prefer though.

[Carnatic]

I would only date a girl I thought was drop dead gorgeous... but then again I would only date a girl who I thought had a fantastic personality and the key word in both these phrases is that what I think is all that matters, and my views on what is gorgeous and what is fantastic are uniquely my own.

 

It's certainly nice when a girl looks good, and as a guy it's nice that I get a modicum of attention from girls when I try to look as good as I can myself. But looks can be changed, really, what the great thing is is that most of us can make ourselves look attractive, you don't have to be born hot, it's really only about style... what really matters is the person beneath the style.

[Lily04]

I think beauty is really in the eye of the beholder... that said, I have dated guys before who I didn't think were really "hot" but who I really connected with on other levels. Some people also find that people who aren't so physically attractive start to look more attractive after you get to know them... so if there's a person you really respect, for ex. they may start to look hotter. For ex. I honestly don't find previous Prime Minister of Canada Pierre Trudeau that hot at all.. he's OK. But girls were swooning over him when he was P.M. Why? Because he was charismatic, intelligent, and maybe because of his status as P.M... so i think he probably started to appear more attractive to the general population as a result. Also because, in comparison to most politicians (who tend to be quite unfortunate looking...) he wasn't bad.

 

I think if you live in an area that's less populated you may also tend to be less picky about looks... just like if you're, say, in a department that doesn't have many good-looking people in it (i.e you work for the dept. of justice) and you're attracted to the intelligence of your co-workers but most aren't that physically attractive... you may start to lower your standards in terms of looks. I just thought of that ex. because one of my friends is starting to clerk for the Supreme Court and she said that if you start single and clerk, you don't get out single. EVERYONE pretty much pairs up there. It's sorta selective breeding... lol.

[itsallgrand]

Yes, I've 'dated' a person I thought was drop dead gorgeous. We're talking physical desirability here, nothing more. Though there was more.

 

I know I'm getting older bc I just don't care one way or the other about this stuff anymore. What a person's body looks like is one quality out of thousands that make up the exquisiteness of getting to know someone closely. To focus on that one 'sparkle of the gem' too much would be boring. I needs variety!

[Psylocke960]

Currently, I am dating someone I feel is all around "drop dead gorgeous." From looks, personality and intellect. He has so much charisma about him that I absolutely love. But does dating him make me feel insecure about my myself? Not at all. He could certainly do better and find a "drop dead gorgeous" woman but I have enough confidence that he won't.

[TheRedQueen]

I would only date a girl I thought was drop dead gorgeous... but then again I would only date a girl who I thought had a fantastic personality and the key word in both these phrases is that what I think is all that matters, and my views on what is gorgeous and what is fantastic are uniquely my own.

 

It's certainly nice when a girl looks good, and as a guy it's nice that I get a modicum of attention from girls when I try to look as good as I can myself. But looks can be changed, really, what the great thing is is that most of us can make ourselves look attractive, you don't have to be born hot, it's really only about style... what really matters is the person beneath the style.

 

Awesome post, I agree whole heartedly!

[Cardinal]

Without reading a single response, I can say I have never asked a drop dead gorgeous girl out. In the past I have been intimidated and also think I have little chance at success.

 

Women who are that gorgeous have the opportunity to be with any man 'they' choose. So I figured maybe if they really wanted me that badly, they would let me know and at least be a little more proactive.

 

I also don't put looks as a very high priority. A woman who is average or slightly above average can provide me with more than I would ever want. So without stereotyping women, I don' t see what motivation I would have personally for asking out the most physically gorgeous woman in the world.

[Cardinal]

When I met my BF for the first time, I wasn't sure he'd be interested in me as he was

 

a) 3.5 years older

b) VERY hot

 

But .... I persued him anyway. Because he was, if nothing else, polite and I knew he'd reject me nicely if he was going to.

 

And you know what?

 

When we'd been together for a couple of months, he said HE was staggered I was interested in HIM, because he considered ME "waaay out of my league".

 

So....just go for it.

 

I am not trying to be overly flattering or put you on the spot. But if that is indeed your picture in your avatar, I can see why he would consider you out of his league. You have to be careful how you perceive yourself.

[mba1]

Yes, but only those who are grounded !

[jurupa]

I would date a girl that is drop dead gorgeous, but if I see something I don't like I am "walking" away. A girls' looks get me to look, her body langauge and behavior gets me to approach.