Date ideas

[jul-els]

Hi,

I recently met a woman and it was instant mutual attraction. The chemistry is off the charts. It’s kinda crazy. Anyway, we’ve been on two dates, both were live music. First date, we met at the place. Second date, I picked her up at her house. She invited me in, we ate a little bit and talked and then went to the show. When I dropped her off she asked me in and we made out a little bit and talked about how strong our attraction is to each other and how we both felt about it. 
 

So, here’s my question. We have a third date this Tuesday and I’m trying to think of ideas for it. I want to ask her to my place, but don’t know if I should. I want sex to happen, but not yet because I don’t want to rush it and by asking her over I feel like maybe I’m opening the door to it too much. But I don’t want her to think I don’t want to invite her to my place either. I like this woman so much I can’t even think straight lol. It feels like she’s the one. She has similar feelings about me. 
 

I don’t know, anyway, next date ideas. Anybody have any? Help with brainstorming would be appreciated. Thanks. 

 

[Wiseman2]

1 minute ago, jul-els said:

. I want to ask her to my place, but don’t know if I should. I want sex to happen, but not yet because I don’t want to rush it and by asking her over.

Why not go out for a nice dinner? At least you could have a conversation without the music?  

[jul-els]

5 minutes ago, Wiseman2 said:

Why not go out for a nice dinner? At least you could have a conversation without the music?  

This is my thought as well. We’ve had great conversations at both dates so far. I’m thinking going to dinner would be fun. But I don’t want her to think I don’t want to invite her over since she’s already invited me to her place. I’m probably overthinking. 

[boltnrun]

During dinner, ask her if she would like to go to your home after for coffee (not drinks or she might think you're trying to get her drunk).

[SherrySher]

1 hour ago, jul-els said:

Hi,

I recently met a woman and it was instant mutual attraction. The chemistry is off the charts. It’s kinda crazy. Anyway, we’ve been on two dates, both were live music. First date, we met at the place. Second date, I picked her up at her house. She invited me in, we ate a little bit and talked and then went to the show. When I dropped her off she asked me in and we made out a little bit and talked about how strong our attraction is to each other and how we both felt about it. 
 

So, here’s my question. We have a third date this Tuesday and I’m trying to think of ideas for it. I want to ask her to my place, but don’t know if I should. I want sex to happen, but not yet because I don’t want to rush it and by asking her over I feel like maybe I’m opening the door to it too much. But I don’t want her to think I don’t want to invite her to my place either. I like this woman so much I can’t even think straight lol. It feels like she’s the one. She has similar feelings about me. 
 

I don’t know, anyway, next date ideas. Anybody have any? Help with brainstorming would be appreciated. Thanks. 

 

A pub with live music, the theatre with a live show, going out for dinner, a sports game, a walk about, museum, art show. 

[smackie9]

We've had woman on here posting about, being asked to visit the dudes flat on the third date and how turned off they were by it. So no, you just met, just keep taking her out on nice dates, and follow her lead. 

[Kwothe28]

Well, she did asked you to her place so maybe she is comfortable coming to yours. However yes, you do run a risk of her thinking you just want one thing. Maybe for some other date say you want to cook for her and ask her if she wants to come over. But for now just take her to dinner. Or maybe even google some fun event that is happening near you and ask her if she wants to go.

Also

2 hours ago, jul-els said:

I like this woman so much I can’t even think straight lol. It feels like she’s the one. She has similar feelings about me. 

You had 2 dates. You are very attracted to each other and that is fine. But you just recently met. Slow down your roles. 

[jul-els]

1 hour ago, Kwothe28 said:

You had 2 dates. You are very attracted to each other and that is fine. But you just recently met. Slow down your roles. 

We don’t have any roles, other than getting to know each other. I’m not sure what you’re referring to. As you said, we just met. 

[boltnrun]

9 minutes ago, jul-els said:

We don’t have any roles, other than getting to know each other. I’m not sure what you’re referring to. As you said, we just met. 

He meant "slow your roll". Non-native English speakers ( and even native English speaking Americans!) sometimes use the incorrect version of a word.

It means just let things happen naturally.

[jul-els]

Just now, boltnrun said:

He meant "slow your roll". Non-native English speakers ( and even native English speaking Americans!) sometimes use the incorrect version of a word.

It means just let things happen naturally.

Oh. I still don’t see where that comment is warranted, but okay. We’re just getting to know each other. No “fast rolling” going on here. Lol

[Batya33]

A day date with a hike and a picnic. 

[tattoobunnie]

Museums, Art Exhibit, Bowling, Axe Throwing, Sporting Event like baseball, hiking, picnic at the park, movies, a play, escape room, cooking class, archery class, beach, restaurant with wine pairing.  So many things to do!

So gross to invite her to your home for a meal and a movie.  It's okay to go out somewhere, and end up to you home, but don't do a "netflix and chill" till like the 8th date or never.

[jul-els]

Just now, Batya33 said:

A day date with a hike and a picnic. 

That would be really great for the future. Probably at the beach. Our next date though is after work in the evening. 

[Batya33]

1 minute ago, jul-els said:

That would be really great for the future. Probably at the beach. Our next date though is after work in the evening. 

I don’t think there’s any reason to have her over to your place on a third date. 

[boltnrun]

9 minutes ago, jul-els said:

Oh. I still don’t see where that comment is warranted, but okay. We’re just getting to know each other. No “fast rolling” going on here. Lol

Because you seem to think you need to have her over to your place right away. Just because she had you over doesn't mean you MUST have her over.

I stand by my earlier suggestion. Take her out to dinner and at the end of the meal ask if she would like to go to your home for coffee (again, NOT drinks or wine). Let her decide. 

[jul-els]

17 minutes ago, tattoobunnie said:

Museums, Art Exhibit, Bowling, Axe Throwing, Sporting Event like baseball, hiking, picnic at the park, movies, a play, escape room, cooking class, archery class, beach, restaurant with wine pairing.  So many things to do!

So gross to invite her to your home for a meal and a movie.  It's okay to go out somewhere, and end up to you home, but don't do a "netflix and chill" till like the 8th date or never.

Inviting someone to come over for dinner and a movie is now “gross”? Lol. I’ll never understand kids these days lol. 

[jul-els]

10 minutes ago, boltnrun said:

Because you seem to think you need to have her over to your place right away. Just because she had you over doesn't mean you MUST have her over.

I stand by my earlier suggestion. Take her out to dinner and at the end of the meal ask if she would like to go to your home for coffee (again, NOT drinks or wine). Let her decide. 

I’m leaning towards this. I’ve picked out a place to meet for dinner and I’ll see how I feel about asking her to come over. I don’t know why you’re getting the impression I feel I must have her over. That’s not the case at all. I’m just trying to decide whether or not I should. 

[boltnrun]

4 hours ago, jul-els said:

But I don’t want her to think I don’t want to invite her over since she’s already invited me to her place.

I was basing my response on this.

I'm glad you're just considering it and don't feel like it needs to happen now. 

[itsallgrand]

Active dates are a favorite of mine. They can be so wholesome but you also get to use up that energy and flirt in a natural way. Golf, a walk somewhere pretty where you can stop in for a meal, go to a river/beach, go dancing, go to a cultural event, go to the park and have a picnic, etc.

I'm excited for you that you are so excited meeting someone. I agree with keeping it to lots of nice dates out of the home and let it happen by her lead. 

 

[jul-els]

21 minutes ago, boltnrun said:

I was basing my response on this.

I'm glad you're just considering it and don't feel like it needs to happen now. 

I just don’t want her to think I’m not ok with inviting her to my home even though she invited me to hers. I don’t want to be impolite or make her feel she was being too forward. I know I probably just need to not think so much about what she’s thinking. I’m a bit giddy about this woman. I know it’s crazy. Just being honest. 

[itsallgrand]

8 minutes ago, jul-els said:

I just don’t want her to think I’m not ok with inviting her to my home even though she invited me to hers. I don’t want to be impolite or make her feel she was being too forward. I know I probably just need to not think so much about what she’s thinking. I’m a bit giddy about this woman. I know it’s crazy. Just being honest. 

I think you are overthinking it! 

She won't judge you for taking her on nice dates, I promise. 

[boltnrun]

13 minutes ago, jul-els said:

I just don’t want her to think I’m not ok with inviting her to my home even though she invited me to hers. I don’t want to be impolite or make her feel she was being too forward. I know I probably just need to not think so much about what she’s thinking. I’m a bit giddy about this woman. I know it’s crazy. Just being honest. 

That's why I suggested you say "I really enjoyed the meal and your company. I hope you did too. Hey, I could go for a coffee. Would you like to come up for a coffee at my place?"

[Wiseman2]

5 hours ago, jul-els said:

. I’m thinking going to dinner would be fun. But I don’t want her to think I don’t want to invite her over since she’s already invited me to her place. 

This is fine. It seems like you're pacing yourself very well. That's ok. If things are going well they'll be plenty of time for "dessert" some other time.

Err on the side of acting like a gentleman. With hookup culture everywhere, you'll stand out.

She'll probably invite herself over soon when you make her comfortable and don't come across too eager.

[tattoobunnie]

1 hour ago, jul-els said:

Inviting someone to come over for dinner and a movie is now “gross”? Lol. I’ll never understand kids these days lol. 

It is on the third date to a woman.  It's like asking for sex on the 3rd date.  Even if you aren't, it's implied, and considered to be much less effort and consideration.  Instead of forcing the situation or setting it up to be about a wham-bam, take your time before even making that a go to date.

[Kwothe28]

1 hour ago, jul-els said:

Oh. I still don’t see where that comment is warranted, but okay. We’re just getting to know each other. No “fast rolling” going on here. Lol

Yes "roll" not "roles", my mistake as I am not native English speaker.

Also I meant on this:

5 hours ago, jul-els said:

I like this woman so much I can’t even think straight lol. It feels like she’s the one. She has similar feelings about me. 

This suggests that neither of you stands firmly on the ground and are "in the clouds". Which, again, is fine since you both are infatuated with each other. It happens at the start as both of you are probably passionable toward each other. But you are talking how "she is the one" after 2 dates. You are literally driving F1 with 350kmh speed there.