Date ideas

[jul-els]

5 minutes ago, Kwothe28 said:

Yes "roll" not "roles", my mistake as I am not native English speaker.

Also I meant on this:

This suggests that neither of you stands firmly on the ground and are "in the clouds". Which, again, is fine since you both are infatuated with each other. It happens at the start as both of you are probably passionable toward each other. But you are talking how "she is the one" after 2 dates. You are literally driving F1 with 350kmh speed there. 

Oh boy. You’re making assumptions. I like her and I know it. That’s a good thing. There’s nothing wrong with that. Not everything in romance is an automatic danger sign. I can assure you I’m a fully formed adult who knows what I’m doing. I said it feels like she’s the one. It doesn’t mean she is. It just feels like it. Time will tell. There’s nothing wrong with being happy. It’s actually what most people want. I’m enjoying it. Yes, I’m getting a little bit goofy about her, no harm in that. Your idea that I’m stepping on the gas is inaccurate. 

[Wonderstruck]

58 minutes ago, Wiseman2 said:

Err on the side of acting like a gentleman. With hookup culture everywhere, you'll stand out.

This.

[jul-els]

1 hour ago, Wiseman2 said:

This is fine. It seems like you're pacing yourself very well. That's ok. If things are going well they'll be plenty of time for "dessert" some other time.

Err on the side of acting like a gentleman. With hookup culture everywhere, you'll stand out.

She'll probably invite herself over soon when you make her comfortable and don't come across too eager.

Agreed. I don’t think she’s going to invite herself to my place, that would be my responsibility, imo. I’ll do so when it feels right. I’m not rushing anything and I’m sure she feels the same way. It’s all brand new right now.

[jul-els]

I think I should probably give some context to the thread at this point. I’m 56 and she’s 60. Neither one of us are spring chickens lol. 

[MrMan1983]

2 hours ago, jul-els said:

Inviting someone to come over for dinner and a movie is now “gross”? Lol. I’ll never understand kids these days lol. 

I think that’s nonsense 😂 Tons of people go to peoples places on a third date and it’s not seen as something seedy. Nothing wrong with a games night at yours or just something fun then dropping her home again. Doesn’t have to lead to sex. 

[jul-els]

Just now, MrMan1983 said:

I think that’s nonsense 😂 Tons of people go to peoples places on a third date and it’s not seen as something seedy. Nothing wrong with a games night at yours or just something fun then dropping her home again. Doesn’t have to lead to sex. 

Agreed.

[boltnrun]

It isn't that women presume "something seedy" is planned or intended. It's based on past experience. I can't tell you how many times I thought I was going to a male friend's home to watch Nascar or something and the guy suggests staying over or sits practically on top of me, rubbing my shoulders or nuzzling my neck or, in one memorable instance, the guy went into his bedroom and came out with a bottle of baby oil and said "take off your top, I'm giving you a backrub." And they all, to a man, got offended when I declined. I've even had some of them say "I mean, what did you think you were coming here for?" And I said "Um, to watch Nascar." And they said " Oh, come on, 'watch Nascar' my a*s, you knew what this was about." And these were men I had known for months if not years.

Now, you come across as a gentleman, respectful and dignified. And you two HAVE been dating and have even kissed so it's not an apples to apples comparison. But unfortunately there are men out there who ruin it for the nice ones. However I'm sure this woman knows by now you're one of the good ones. I'm just trying to give some insight from a woman's point of view why so many of us are hesitant and cautious. 

[rainbowsandroses]

2 hours ago, jul-els said:

I think I should probably give some context to the thread at this point. I’m 56 and she’s 60. Neither one of us are spring chickens lol. 

Thank.you for clarifying that and that you're not a couple of college kids looking to get laid, lol.

You're two mature adults who know how to behave properly and respectfully, at least you seem like you do.  No matter where you are.

I'm in my 30s and I love 'at home' dates.  I don't assume my date is after sex, I trust a man until he gives me reason not to.  I exercise my best judgment.

That attitude has always worked really well for me.  And I've had plenty of 'at home' early dates where my date was a perfect gentleman; contrast to that I've been out with men who were all over me, groping me and such.  THAT is what I find gross, personally. 

Imo it really depends on the two people and how well they're connecting and vibing up to that point. 

If you feel comfortable inviting her to yours and sharing a lovely meal and quiet time together and you sense she would feel comfortable too, go for it!

It doesn't hurt to ask.  I highly doubt she will think less of you for it, or assume you just want sex. 

JMO of course.  Good luck whatever you decide.  

[tattoobunnie]

20 hours ago, MrMan1983 said:

Doesn’t have to lead to sex. 

Where are they now?  It's not seedy, but it sets the tone that this is it.  There a level of pressure that this is the end game. It "doesn't have to lead to sex," but that is showing her how you lead.  It's different if it's with a group, or you've known eachother for a while.   Save the cheap home date that in reality, makes a woman anxious, especially when you weren't friends prior and know eachother, for down the road.  When you are married with kids, all dates are Netflix and chill or game night.