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Life in the Driver’s Seat (extended)


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My mom and I are getting along better . We have had our dust ups though. I told her to STOP complaining and whining and be grateful for everything and everyone we do have. Also stop trying to fill silence. Silence is allowable and necessary. 
 

I went away last weekend to see my husband and say goodbye to a friend who is moving 10 hours away. When I came back she was a changed woman. She has started participating and doing some clean up and arranging and getting her own coffee and washing dishes etc. It is a great change and I thanked her for improving the place from when I left . 
 

So thankful she has cheered up. 

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13 minutes ago, Jaunty said:

You and your mom both seem to be doing your parts to make this work.  I'm sure it's a stunning change for both of you.   

Thank you. It has been much better for both of us I think. I am glad I didn’t back down from my boundaries though. A decade ago I would have and just stewed in misery . I am so glad my 50’s brought me confidence and knowing who I am and that I am not being unrealistic or selfish in asking people to respect me and my boundaries. 
 

I also have misophonia so her constant need to fill silence with yapping drives me INSANE, I mean to the point of rage. So I asked her to please stop. 

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I have been having horrendous dreams lately, like violent gory horrific dreams involving family, family I love. Things that would never happen. 
 

I also am having dreams of home invasions at our house . As a kid we had people break into our house twice . It horrifies me so much I always triple check to make sure doors are locked before bed. 

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Just now, Seraphim said:

I have been having horrendous dreams lately, like violent gory horrific dreams involving family, family I love. Things that would never happen. 
 

I also am having dreams of home invasions at our house . As a kid we had people break into our house twice . It horrifies me so much I always triple check to make sure doors are locked before bed. 

I tend to check on stuff like that too. I’m so sorry that happened to you. !

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11 minutes ago, Batya33 said:

I tend to check on stuff like that too. I’m so sorry that happened to you. !

It was scary for sure. One was when I was 12 and the house had been empty for a while and we moved in with our mom and her best friend and her kids. Some guy walked in at 7 AM with a blow torch. 
 

Second time I was 17 and we had gone to the movies as a family came back and went into my room and some guy was crawling in my bedroom window. 

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1 hour ago, Seraphim said:

Unfortunately got a hair cut it is a disaster. It will be 6 weeks growing out before it can be fixed . 

Ugh I'm sorry -at least you know where not to go next time.

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17 hours ago, Batya33 said:

Ugh I'm sorry -at least you know where not to go next time.

I think it is that she had little experience ( 1 ) year post schooling. I know they need experience but not on my hair thanks . 
 

I look like a boy . It is just so awful. I HAD a cute pixie cut for a few years but this is just typical boy cut like you see on 3 year olds . I couldn’t even sleep last night I am just so distressed. 

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Today is two years since my husband’s horrible bike accident . Glad to say he is totally recovered. 
There is still lingering emotional harm to me and my son from the emotional fall out of the accident though. 

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19 hours ago, Seraphim said:

Unfortunately got a hair cut it is a disaster. It will be 6 weeks growing out before it can be fixed . 

Hey Seraphim! 
 

Ohhh! We’ve all been there, but this sounds like you really hate it! 
 

I know it might be a bit of a pathetic suggestion but, what about for the weeks or months it’s growing out either rocking it by accessorising or switching up your make up orrrrrr even trying a scarf? 
 

x

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Thank you for the suggestions. My head unfortunately from front to back is extremely narrow , I don’t have a round head at all so scarfs slip right off. 
 

Basically she gave me this cut. While gorgeous on a boy isn’t on me . 

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31 minutes ago, Jaunty said:

It won't take too long for it to grow out enough for you to get the style you wanted ... the color too?  That is gorgeous.

The purple would look excellent on me for sure . I had pink before and it looked great. I will have to have the slanted bang put back in because she cut it across,  unfortunately. The minute it gets long enough to cut the slant back in I can do that myself. It should take about 6 weeks to grow out . Until then I guess my summer outside hat everywhere I go. 

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I bet you don't look bad at all with the little boy haircut.   Maybe you can find a way to style it that's at least "fun."  And remember that it's very temporary.   Though frustrating to not get what you want, for sure.

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12 minutes ago, Jaunty said:

I bet you don't look bad at all with the little boy haircut.   Maybe you can find a way to style it that's at least "fun."  And remember that it's very temporary.   Though frustrating to not get what you want, for sure.

True. It isn’t forever . 

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19 hours ago, Jaunty said:

Congratulations to him and your family!  That's a load off, for the future, isn't it?

For sure . He is working longer to further pad his pension but at least it is a secure deal. 

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