Am I being paranoid?

[katrina1980]

To add Alex, just two months ago you created a thread about how nervous you were running into your ex at an event; which indicates to me you had not completely moved on emotionally, just two months ago.

 

I posted about feeling indifferent, and you said you were not there yet, but hoped to be someday.

 

Given that, and that you were not (and still may not be in your heart of hearts) over your ex, I have no idea why you started seriously dating your current in the first place; at one point you posted you were not even attracted to him! Or questioned your attraction.

 

All these were separate threads.

 

Anyway, nuff said only to reiterate how toxic all this is and perhaps its best to end it, get your own shyt together before you start seriously dating another man.

 

Despite your assertions to the contrary, your relationship sounds seriously off.

[AlexSays]

Yeah, you’re totally right. Everyone is right. Trust me. I know.

That’s event brought me the closure I needed. I was nervous because he was still talking about me. But that night everything was squashed. We haven’t spoken at all since then but we don’t have beef. I’ve moved on.

 

The past is something I’m seriously trying to stop focusing on though. I’ve moved on in more ways than one. I started a new career and education and have been focusing on my illustrating career and my relationship. I’m not letting the past hold me back from where I’m heading now.

 

I honestly feel like a different person. My mind is in a complete different place now, and I’m so happy for that. (Something life changing did happen to me. Something I’m not saying but this was what brought on the apologies to my partner, the open communications and relationship talks.) and everything was squashed. We both have never committed the same mistake twice (like if he or I do something and the other says they aren’t ok w it we have never done it again). I’m not willing to give up on my relationship. My partner has never given up on me and I won’t either.

 

But thank you. I do appreciate your input. Thanks to you, a switch turned on that had been off for a while. And that is to never fear losing someone.

 

my shyt is together. It wasn’t a couple of months ago, but it is now. And he knows. We’ve always been transparent with each other and have had that talk. We are currently good and moving forward from the situation.

[figureitout23]

Yeah, you’re totally right. Everyone is right. Trust me. I know.

That’s event brought me the closure I needed. I was nervous because he was still talking about me. But that night everything was squashed. We haven’t spoken at all since then but we don’t have beef. I’ve moved on.

 

The past is something I’m seriously trying to stop focusing on though. I’ve moved on in more ways than one. I started a new career and education and have been focusing on my illustrating career and my relationship. I’m not letting the past hold me back from where I’m heading now.

 

I honestly feel like a different person. My mind is in a complete different place now, and I’m so happy for that. (Something life changing did happen to me. Something I’m not saying but this was what brought on the apologies to my partner, the open communications and relationship talks.) and everything was squashed. We both have never committed the same mistake twice (like if he or I do something and the other says they aren’t ok w it we have never done it again). I’m not willing to give up on my relationship. My partner has never given up on me and I won’t either.

 

But thank you. I do appreciate your input. Thanks to you, a switch turned on that had been off for a while. And that is to never fear losing someone.

 

my shyt is together. It wasn’t a couple of months ago, but it is now. And he knows. We’ve always been transparent with each other and have had that talk. We are currently good and moving forward from the situation.

 

Unfortunately since this relationship has been tainted by your past, the only way to truly move forward is to either, not be in it or truly fix it. Relationships survive rough pasts, they do, but both have to be willing to own their part. Alex you cant even own up to strangers on the internet who see all the facts out of you mouth in writing, so I find it hard to believe you own up with him. Anytime people hold your feet to the fire you get overly defensive, insist your life is perfect, and put your head in the sand. Your prerogative, if you like it, I love it, but guess what? You dont get to then turn around complain and get people to tell you what a mean, mean man your boyfriend is when sh*t hits the fan and you want validation. You want to stay in this relationship, accept the reality of it.

 

I'm chalking a lot of this up to age FWIW.

 

ETA: Please dont think my response means I dont think what hes doing is wrong, I do.

[MissCanuck]

There has been so much damage done to this relationship, by both of you, that I don’t see how it’s going to ever truly flourish, OP.

 

It sounds like both you and he need to do some growing up, because you’re both still a bit green when it comes to how mature relationships work. My prediction is that sooner or later, this will end, but that you will one day look back on this and take some valuable lessons from it.

 

And meddling in someone else’s relationships on the daily so he can write poems is absurd. It does speak to his overall entitled and disrespectful mindset, though.

[catfeeder]

Whenever I sense that someone is trying to yank my chain, I take a fast leap away. Manipulation is manipulation. I won't stick around to try to analyze motives--I'm not interested in those. Nothing good can come out of them. Period.