My ex boyfriend is ignoring my texts

[Hun94]

My ex boyfriend is ignoring my texts? What do I do? What kind of messages can I send For him to reply an for him want me back without being desperate

[glitterfingers]

He is ignoring your texts because he is your ex boyfriend

 

Give him space

[MissCanuck]

Stop messaging him. He's making it very clear he doesn't want to talk to you, girl.

[Creacion]

It maybe that he's blocked your contact. It's important to move on without holding onto the past. Frees up meeting the right person.

[boltnrun]

He blocked you, told you he's moving on, and has advised you to move on.

 

He doesn't seem interested in getting back together.

 

I know it’s painful, but it's best to accept his decision and to work on moving on like he already has.

[Annia]

You need to engage in NC. It's obvious that you still want him but he decided that he wants to move on. Respect his decision and take it as a sign that it is now time for you to focus on yourself and learn to live without him.

[Hun94]

He's blocked me on everything

[Tomthumb88]

You can't do anything.. stop trying and work on yourself. Odd twist is that moving on with your life makes him coming back more likely than pushing him would, not saying it will happen but getting on with your life helps you in two ways.

[MissCanuck]

He's blocked me on everything

 

Well, then, there is nothing you can do.

[Hun94]

I feel like I cant. I just want him back. Is there no advice on how to do this

[LaHermes]

Hun.

 

I just want him back. Is there no advice on how to do this

 

No.

 

You can't make him or anyone else do anything they do not wish to do, just because you "want" it. Please heed the good advice the other posters have given you.

[Capricorn3]

I feel like I cant. I just want him back. Is there no advice on how to do this

 

This is going on for 3 MONTHS now and he has blocked you - which clearly means he is NOT interested in going back. He's done and wants nothing to do with you anymore. You cannot make someone go back to you when they DON'T WANT TO. You need to learn to accept this. let it go and move on.

 

Side note: No need to keep making new threads on the same topic. Please stick to one thread. Thanks.

[MissCanuck]

No, you literally cannot do anything if he's blocked you on everything.

[reinventmyself]

I feel like I cant. I just want him back. Is there no advice on how to do this

There is no way to force someone to communicate with you if they choose not to.

Trying to do so, especially after they have requested you not to is considered harassment.

I'm sorry. It's obvious you are having a difficult time with this.

 

Your best chance for getting someone to respond is to back off and respect their wishes.

Continuing to push only drives them further away and possibly validates their reason for not wanting to talk to in the first place

[Deeed]

Could you not message him on different number- one last time - I don't know your whole story - so I don't know if he is just upset with you because something you done and you wanna apologise.

 

One time - a guy blocked me on everything because I said to him a lot of mean things - where he got really upset and blocked me - so I messaged him on another number and I apologised, at first he didn't accept but second time he did. But I always gave a week in between fo him to cool off when I send the second message and he unblocked me.

 

 

Like I said I don't know what has gone between you guys but that's the only suggestion I have for you.

 

Good luck x

[No1]

If you want him to miss you, he has to see a world without you. He broke up with you for a reason, and he blocked you. The harder you try to reach out all you are doing is 1. Validating why he broke up with you. 2. Pushing him away further 3. Shows him that you are the Crazy X GF 4. Makes his resolve to never speak to you again stronger.

 

Happiness is the best revenge. Leave him alone.

[glitterfingers]

Literally the only option you have to change his mind is to respect his wishes and give him space. For at least a few months until you've both calmed down. Ironically, when we're in this hyperemotional state where we feel we need to prove our love to someone who has left us, our actions will just create more of a distance.

 

I have been in a situation before where someone that I cared about blocked me from contacting them... I let things go, and moved on with my life, but 6 months later I sent a message off a second Facebook account i had just saying I apologised and missed him. We started talking again immediately and the spark came back again. This situation is the exception to the rule, most of the time they won't come back and probably the only reason he did was because he blocked me hastily after a couple of arguments and I gave him space and time to cool down and process how he truly felt towards me. I also did the same thing (cooled down), because it allowed me to clearly see whether contacting him again was good for me.

 

So no matter what the outcome, the only thing you can do right now is to let him be and try to move on and recover. You can't do anything that will have a positive impact until you have gotten past this state that you are in right now.

[Tomthumb88]

Listen to glitterfingers! It's counter intuitive but true and I personally wish I could have understood that earlier.

Also, you can heal this way and you really need to.

[johnnydanger]

If you really love him and want him back, you can try writing a letter. Be genuine and express your true feelings, and ask for a second chance.

 

That's pretty much the best option at this point. At least it's direct and there will be no second guessing on his part as to your intentions.

 

After that, don't pester him or pressure him. Just leave it alone and give him some time to think.

 

I think trying this will help you feel that you made a decent effort, and will also help you move on in the event he doesn't respond.

 

That's my opinion as a guy, so if any of you expert ladies don't like it then tough!

[Tomthumb88]

a letter is just going to reinforce that she has low value and he's free to keep her on the back burner. Walking away is her best option for multiple reasons at this point. A letter might be ok had she been walking away for quite some time but it appears she's been on him the whole time.

[johnnydanger]

Meh, sometimes you have to fight for what you want / need too. Depends on the person and how much in love they are. There isn't one magic formula for all scenarios. I suggested the letter because it is also a more sincere and serious effort as opposed to firing off a text.

[Tomthumb88]

The problem with the letter is that it's still an attempt to change a persons mind. They're still going to resist and it's at best nuteral but probably just reinforces his opinion. I suppose months later after cooling down and not having contact there is a chance he'll dig it out and then might think it sweet.

FYI.. I've sent the letter and it didn't get her back, provide me closure or make me feel that I'd given my all. All it did was continue my anxiety as I never received a response.

[boltnrun]

An ex of mine wrote me an email (not a letter).

 

It just emphasized that I'd made the right decision because he wasn't respecting my wishes (despite the fact that in the email he said he would let me go, he still asked to see me).

 

You send a letter then wait on pins and needles hoping he responds. What if he doesn't? Then you feel even worse PLUS feel foolish for acting desperate.

 

"Fighting for what you want" is a nice idea, but only if you have some idea the other person feels the same way. When you refuse to accept reality it becomes annoying and then harassment if you persist.

[glitterfingers]

I think a letter/email is a terrible idea personally, as this person has just gone to great lengths to put a barrier up and prevent contact. If that is an option, leave it several months until things have calmed down, because right now this ex is running fast in the opposite direction. If you send more contact now, when he already knows that you still want him and he's already feeling really negatively and trying to get away, you will ruin your chances of that email/letter having any effect later when he's had a chance to calm down and think. Because the odds are he will not respond to a letter, so you'd have to send a second one in the future and that would once again just cause him to feel smothered.

 

Sometimes you do have to fight for what you want, but you don't do that by chasing someone who doesn't want to be caught.

 

4-6 months is a good time frame before you contact him again. You do not want to make him the centre of your world when he's not even making you an option.

 

Time has a wonderful way of healing.

 

Also like boltnrun I had an ex write me a letter and stick it in my childhood photo album, I happened to find it about 1 month after the split rather than years later thankfully. I tore that mofo up and was furious because that letter was trying to make me change how I remembered/viewed the breakup and trying to make me doubt my judgement and decisions. 6-9 months later I would have been more receptive once I started to miss him, but the relationship was toxic anyway and it took me time to realise the breakup was actually the best thing for me. Maybe it'll turn out that way for you too... Don't be afraid to let life *happen* and see where it takes you. Just try and let go.

[johnnydanger]

Just because it was terrible in your experience, doesn't mean it will be for everyone else.