Lostinlove99 Posted May 4, 2017 Share Posted May 4, 2017 I started a new job around 9 months ago. Around a month in a colleague asked if I’d be interested in a fling. I was very reluctant as I knew I liked this person already, but agreed. Instantly we hit it off and things progressed. Unfortunately that person is due to get married soon, but we both agree that we have fallen madly in love. The problem is that person feels trapped, they have very few close friends and family and have built their life around their future partner. They feel they have to go through with the marriage as it is now so close. The partner is very controlling but in a very clever way and the partners family is unbelievably interfering and it is another reason why they cant get out of the relationship. The person also suffers badly with anxiety. They don’t love their partner, aren’t attracted to them and avoid spending any time with them wherever possible. I got them to speak to the only 2 family members they have and both said that the wedding should not go ahead, but they don’t really seem to have listened. The person wont just tell me they are getting married and this needs to stop and the way they speak sounds like a huge cry for help. I have always stood by the fact that it has to be their decision to walk away and not a result of me interfering and have always done everything in my power to make sure they don’t get caught, however the wedding is looming and they are still making comments that make me wonder. If they told me they want to get married and for me to walk away I would, but they have not ever been able to tell me that despite me asking. I am madly in love with this person and have supported them in every walk of their life as much as I have been able to. They have told me that if it wasn’t so close it would be different, but the thought of being trapped and letting people down, makes them too anxious to leave. It’s starting to make me quite sick. I am hardly eating or sleeping and just feel so down all of the time. If this person gets married I am likely going to have to leave the job, as seeing them newlywed with loads of congratulations and stories to tell will just break my heart. They say one day in the future they hope they are strong enough to walk away so we can be together. But honestly once they are married that isn't going to happen. Do I step in now and help them out of this by planting the seed with their partner or do I just let them get on with it and potentially ruin their life because they weren’t strong enough to walk away? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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