Natasha207 Posted February 23, 2017 Share Posted February 23, 2017 Hi everyone, I have been in a long term relationship for 7 years with many ups and downs. I have been engaged since 2015 and called off the engagement last week. Is it the right thing to do to wait for your partner to change in order to be happy? Long story short, we have had a rocky past. The emotional abuse is no longer an issue and he did show resilience and ability to change years ago. Right now, my ex is struggling with an addiction to marijuana that has lasted decades. He has severe anxiety and PTSD. He has been spending $1200 a month on his habit, and as a result, even after he pressured me to set a date for this summer for our wedding, we haven't been able to save a cent! I resent him for this and then he goes and tells me that the reason he didn't attempt to save or co-operate with the wedding planning is that he actually had anxiety about the wedding in the first place. He said that if we were to ever marry, it would have to be private and low-key. I feel like I have been compromising my own dreams, needs and wants for this man. He treats me well, but this lack of co-operating has made me lose trust in him and his ability to cope with the responsibilities of adult life. I am looking for any insight at all! I have my strong moments of "Yes! You can do this, be the independent and strong woman you once were!" Then I have the moments of "Oh god, I do love him"... I know love isn't enough... but are my complaints and gripes justifiable to end this??? Thanks so much to you all for listening. I appreciate any input. Link to comment
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