JA0371 Posted February 20, 2015 Author Share Posted February 20, 2015 I'm glad you guys are having fun! That's nice that he wants you to meet his friends. I would take it one date at a time for now even though the talking makes it seem as if you know him longer/better. That's nice that his friend thought you were pretty and that he told you that. Thank you...I agree. Always good to hear your feedback. He is a good guy, for sure! Link to comment
pippy longstocking Posted February 20, 2015 Share Posted February 20, 2015 oh here you are ..I lost this thread, so have just had a good catch up ...and all is fab fab fab fab I see love it Link to comment
JA0371 Posted February 21, 2015 Author Share Posted February 21, 2015 Alright guys.....I have a huge update: I have a date with K tomorrow ..(Sunday) but we were talking on Ftime last night (Friday) like normal, joking, flirting, he was cooking and having a drink...but he got kind of serious, and literally said he is definetely 'falling in love with me'...and that he knows I am what he wants long term and that he knows he wants me to meet his kids. He said he wants me to feel secure about how he feels and that he thinks Im amazing etc. I mean.....wow!!! I was speechless. Im pretty sure I just had my mouth open with a look of shock lol!! But I did smile and tell him that I was happy he felt that way and that the feeling was mutual. I know we've only had a few official 'dates'...and I really hope we aren't going too fast...lconsidering we haven't even had sex yet, though he also said had he been in my vicinity last night, that we most likely would have lol!! So....how's that for an update?? Lol Link to comment
missmarple Posted February 21, 2015 Share Posted February 21, 2015 How many dates have you had with him? Is it 3? Link to comment
JA0371 Posted February 21, 2015 Author Share Posted February 21, 2015 Tomorrow will be three in person dates. Yes, I know it seems wayyyy to soon... We talk literally every day, via Ftime for usually no less than 30 minutes. And yes it's not in person, but it's as in person as we can be. In addition to texting here and there. We both prefer Ftime if we can't actually be together. This morning he Ftimed me while I drove through McDonald's!! Lol..my point being, I feel like we communicate so much that I do feel comfortable with how things are unfolding. Link to comment
missmarple Posted February 21, 2015 Share Posted February 21, 2015 It seems like everything is going fine between you but as for meeting his kids? Way too soon. You've only had 2 in person dates and communication is one thing...but nothing can replace actually spending time with someone...and, in my opinion, before you meet someone's kids, you should be sure that it's a serious relationship. How old are his kids? Link to comment
Batya33 Posted February 21, 2015 Share Posted February 21, 2015 I don't think it's fair to the children to meet them after having two dates with their father. Kids get attached easily and until you both know this is long term based on going on many dates over a long period of time I don't think it's fair to them. If this is really long term then what is the rush?? Have tons of fun and excitement getting to know him whether you choose to talk, text, face time or spend time in person but please don't risk letting his children get attached to you at this early stage. Link to comment
janut1 Posted February 21, 2015 Share Posted February 21, 2015 I agree with the kids thing that MM said above. I have kids and I don't let any guy Im dating meet them until I am absolutely sure he is going to be in my life. That said, it can take awhile for me to feel comfortable with that. Also, since you haven't had sex yet, I don't want to be off base here, but thats a big piece of being compatible. I would hate to see everything going good then you have sex and its bad... What happens then? Link to comment
Batya33 Posted February 21, 2015 Share Posted February 21, 2015 It depends on how she defines sexual compatibility. I could tell without having actual sex. But I agree with the rest. Also ask yourself why he wants this insta-relationship that involves his children. Is it so that it will be more convenient to see each other? Link to comment
JA0371 Posted February 21, 2015 Author Share Posted February 21, 2015 Ok just to clarify, I am NOt meeting his kids anytime soon. He was speaking in future tense. We both know its WAY too soon for that. We are thinking probably months for that. Also, the sex thing is a good question. I've thought of it myself, but we talk about it a LOT because we both want it a LOT, but we also don't want it to be the bases of our relationship. Good sex doesn't always equal a good relationship. K is actually a pretty principled guy, and I love that about him. There are so few men like him IMO. Most guys would have definetely caved by now...and it makes me feel like he truly likes me for ME and that he respects me. I am extremely attracted to him, so to be honest, I have no doubt that the sex will be worth the wait. Ps: I forgot to mention..his kids are boy (13) and girl (9) Link to comment
mhowe Posted February 21, 2015 Share Posted February 21, 2015 Caved by now? Despite all the face time....you have had 2 dates and he is the one who is standing on the brakes. Link to comment
missmarple Posted February 21, 2015 Share Posted February 21, 2015 Just a piece of advice regarding sex because I've been there (long story short had met guy online, lots of chats, many of them about sex, eventually met, slept together on 4th or 5th date - huge disappointment). Don't talk much about sex before you actually do it...it can create a fantasy that the reality won't be able to match..that's what had happened in my case. Link to comment
JA0371 Posted February 21, 2015 Author Share Posted February 21, 2015 Caved by now? Despite all the face time....you have had 2 dates and he is the one who is standing on the brakes. Trust me....if we did see each other more often, we most likely would have given in. It just so happens that our schedules don't allow it at the moment. This is a discussion we've had many times. Im glad our relationship isn't based on just the physical. If it were then I'd be told that's all he wants. It will happen...and I think it will be more special when it does, because we actually do like and care about each other. Link to comment
mhowe Posted February 21, 2015 Share Posted February 21, 2015 Bit that is the point....your/his schedules right now is having a major impact on your abilities to be in each others company....face to face. Link to comment
JA0371 Posted February 21, 2015 Author Share Posted February 21, 2015 Bit that is the point....your/his schedules right now is having a major impact on your abilities to be in each others company....face to face. I agree. We both agree. We both agreed we will try to see each other at least once a week after our next date because going longer is definetely hard. Hooefully that will give us something more 'real'. Link to comment
missmarple Posted February 21, 2015 Share Posted February 21, 2015 Once a week sounds fine at this point and, hopefully, it's a realistic plan Link to comment
janut1 Posted February 21, 2015 Share Posted February 21, 2015 Just a piece of advice regarding sex because I've been there (long story short had met guy online, lots of chats, many of them about sex, eventually met, slept together on 4th or 5th date - huge disappointment). Don't talk much about sex before you actually do it...it can create a fantasy that the reality won't be able to match..that's what had happened in my case. Same happened to me, so I agree and thats why I mentioned it. Link to comment
JA0371 Posted February 21, 2015 Author Share Posted February 21, 2015 Trust me.......when it happens, Im sure you all WILL know..hahaha!!! Link to comment
Batya33 Posted February 21, 2015 Share Posted February 21, 2015 You like and care about each other as much as two people can having gone on two dates. You are attached to a person you don't know yet as far as what he is like in a romantic relationship. Yes I think if you want long term potential figure out a way to see each other once a week. I don't agree that "most guys" would have insisted on having sex after meeting twice. He very well might have a wonderful character, sense of integrity and be highly principled but being comfortable with taking you out on a handful of dates without sex is not an example of that IMO. I'm so glad you're waiting to meet the kids. Have fun on your next date! Link to comment
JA0371 Posted February 23, 2015 Author Share Posted February 23, 2015 Today's update: uhhhh ...mazinggggg... Seriously. At the risk of sounding annoying..today truly was amazing! K had to attend church...then his sons soccer game, then he came to see me. We met at the salon. I cut his hair, then made out...lol. Sorry tmi.....but it's so hard to keep our hands off each other. Then we went to dinner, at this place a client recommended. Kind of dive ish...but the food was awesome!! K really liked it. Then, we went to the beach and watched the sunset on the beach. It was sooooo nice. We had such a hard time leaving..lol. More kissing, etc..but he has a crazy week coming up. He has lots of extra work, and his kids. I understand. He wants this to work...so do I. So much!!!' Omgoshhh !! Im falling sooo hard Link to comment
pippy longstocking Posted February 23, 2015 Share Posted February 23, 2015 Today's update: uhhhh ...mazinggggg... Seriously. At the risk of sounding annoying..today truly was amazing! K had to attend church...then his sons soccer game, then he came to see me. We met at the salon. I cut his hair, then made out...lol. Sorry tmi.....but it's so hard to keep our hands off each other. Then we went to dinner, at this place a client recommended. Kind of dive ish...but the food was awesome!! K really liked it. Then, we went to the beach and watched the sunset on the beach. It was sooooo nice. We had such a hard time leaving..lol. More kissing, etc..but he has a crazy week coming up. He has lots of extra work, and his kids. I understand. He wants this to work...so do I. So much!!!' Omgoshhh !! Im falling sooo hard ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh *sigh* I was sat on the beach with you then in my head ja its all fab ...just fab fab fab Link to comment
Batya33 Posted February 23, 2015 Share Posted February 23, 2015 That's great that you had such a fun and romantic date! Link to comment
missmarple Posted February 23, 2015 Share Posted February 23, 2015 Ahhhhhhhhhhh..I'm jealous! Keep updating Link to comment
JA0371 Posted February 23, 2015 Author Share Posted February 23, 2015 Thank you everyone! After I posted last night, I took my dog out, came back in and had missed a couple of calls from him. So he text me and said ' I tried to call, no answer, but I just wanted to say I miss you already'. Lol....so of course I HAD to call him back. Yes, I know it's still early on..but it's so nice to be on the same level with someone emotionally. Link to comment
JA0371 Posted March 1, 2015 Author Share Posted March 1, 2015 Hi guys!! I'm seeing K tomorrow! Date #4 officially woohoo....and almost three months since we met! it's going good still. Still....have NOT slept together, though the topic comes up quite frequently. It's getting harder and more tempting..but we are seeing how it goes. So we are planning dates that don't put us in those situations. Tomorrow we are meeting in the afternoon to go for a walk together and maybe have lunch. It was My suggestion. This is K's weekend with his kids and it's been crazy busy, but he's still let me know he's thinking of me when he gets the chance. I'll update you all soon.. Link to comment
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