Life On The Rocinante' (After Dark!)

[Cynder]

I tried to get adam to spend a little time with me after work tonight since he has today off. He wasn't interested. So I was invited out to a family member's place for dinner. Came out here, texted him to tell him I miss him. That was a half hour ago. No reply. No wonder I'm not faithful. Its like we aren't even a couple any more.

[Cynder]

The bomb shelter is gone... that bums me out. Seriously. I want to cry.

[Cynder]

I had my phone and couldn't write in more detail when posting the last post...

 

When I was growing up, there was a bomb shelter on my parents' property. We used to play in it as kids. Then as teenagers my sister and I smoked weed in there a few times.

 

I was always fascinated with it... When I was a kid I didn't really understand it's significance. As an adult I recognized it as a part of history. It's from the WWII era.

 

Tonight I was at my Mom's place and saw it was gone. She said she had it torn down because she was tired of looking at it. I can't really explain why it made me so sad looking over where it was and seeing it wasn't there.

[DrKitten]

That's terrible. Things with historical significance should be preserved and appreciated.

[Cynder]

I can hear the Cicadas outside. I wish I could see them. But I can see the sound they make, and how many people can say that?

[OptomisticGirl]

I knew a woman who withdrew her entire life savings and left it in her purse - which she left in a local resturant bathroom. She was VERY lucky the person who found it return it all without taking any.

[Cynder]

That's terrible. Things with historical significance should be preserved and appreciated.

 

Yes... the bomb shelter should have been treasured, not torn down. I have a lot of pics of it though, so it's immortalized in a way.

[Cynder]

I knew a woman who withdrew her entire life savings and left it in her purse - which she left in a local resturant bathroom. She was VERY lucky the person who found it return it all without taking any.

 

Yes, thank the God for honest people.

[Cynder]

I hate it when people I work with find out I'm a college grad and ask me "what are you working here for?" That bugs me to no end... obviously I'm working here because its my best option at the moment. If there was some awesome job out there waiting for me I would be there, not here. Do these people not have the common sense to realize that? A college degree means a lot less now that anyone can get a bachelor's online in 18 months. There are more grads then there are jobs.

[DN]

There are thousands of college grads not working or not working in a job where they use their degree.

[Cynder]

Well, today my job is making me feel more worthless then I normally feel.

[DN]

Why is that?

[Cynder]

Why is that?

 

Because we started a new system for inspecting parts. I am in charge of the two fastest paced assembly lines in the shop. I am responsible for certifying, tagging rust proofing and packing the parts. Then I send them to shipping. It's really quick.

 

The speed isn't a problem. I can keep up fine. The problem is I'm stuck in the cell known casually as "the Nazi camp" with the most hated cell leader in all the shop. And she hates QCs.

 

Yesterday I spent all day getting yelled and screamed at. And she's not even my boss. I'm in Quality Control, I answer to someone different. But I'm in her cell, so I have to at least show some respect for her authority.

 

I have to write down my count every 15 minutes. At first I was counting the parts manually because I know the counters on the machines aren't always accurate. She yelled at me for that. SO I started getting my count off the machines, and an hour later she yelled at me for that. Because I'm just a QC and QCs aren't allowed anywhere near the machines. This is something I've never heard before, but according to her they aren't. And since I need to write down my count every 15 minutes I had to keep taking a few steps off to the side and looking at the clock. And she came around the corner at one point and was like "You need to stop worrying about what time it is and do your f'ing job!" I told her I have to write my count down every 15 minutes and she said that's too bad, she's not going to have me walking back and forth all day looking at the clock when I'm supposed to be at the end of both lines certifying. Really, I counted... It was only like 5 steps I had to walk to look at the clock. I kept doing it though. My boss wants a count every 15 minutes, regardless of what she says.

 

And it's going to happen this way no matter what. I certify and pack a cluster of parts off one line, naturally a few parts are going to pile up at the end of the other line. I found the best method was to just go back and forth. Do a few here, then do a few there. She didn't like that at all. According to her I shouldn't have any parts sitting at all. The parts should be picked up as soon as they come off the line. That's impossible though. IF I was in charge of one line I could do it, but not two lines.

 

I had a few parts pile up while I was tagging a bin for shipping... I got yelled at for not doing my job. Basically I got yelled at all day for everything I did but a mean hateful woman who really doesn't even have authority over me. She's in charge of the machinists in that cell, I'm in a different department altogether. She doesn't like QCs because she sees us as unnecessary. She thinks the work done in her cell is so good that it shouldn't need to be inspected. Well, they do good work. I'll say that. But yesterday I stopped a few bad parts from getting out the door. IF they would have been shipped it would have been her and me both in trouble.

 

So yea... it's a new system. Still trying to work out the bugs. I have to learn to deal with her and she has to learn to deal with me. I'm assigned to that cell indefinitely, so we'll see what happens.

 

It was cool last night though... After the bad day I had at work I blew off steam playing Soul Calibur with Aaron. He whipped my ass but that's all good.

[Cynder]

Oh my...

 

I drank way too much and didn't get enough sleep, but I'm still heading to work. Journey was amazing. I don't care what anyone says, I won't ever stop believin'.

 

When they played Stoned In Love i couldn't help but think of Aaron... even though Stoned In Lust would be more accurate for him. Since as of now I know thats more what I feel.

 

Last night I told my Mom a few things that I probably shouldn't have. But now she knows. She wasn't very warm. But she never is. And my sister accused me of being a straight chick trying to use other women. I will never understand why no one questions her lesbianism, but I've gotten crap for being Bi since day one. Someone explain it to me please...

 

The lady in my life was supposed to come with me last night, but she couldn't. My Mom was trying to tell me that she is only using me. Then I have my sister trying to tell me that I am just using her. Ok... I don't get why it has to be analyzed like that. Of course no one can just let things be as they are.

 

The 5 hour energy will be coming in handy today. Good thing I keep some of those stocked in my locker at work for days like this.

[Cynder]

Last night is still bumming me out. They say they don't love me any less because of my sexual orientation... but let's still turn it into a negative.

[Cynder]

I wish I had a scale... I wonder how many pounds living on slimfast and five hour energy have gotten rid of the last few days, lol.

[Cynder]

You can pat me on the head and say "Hey what's up ****head?" And make it sound like Shakespear. You can butcher Nine Inch Nails on karaoke night at the tavern and still be even hotter then Trent Rezner. You can sing the diarrhea song and bark like a dog while smooching with me, and I don't even think twice about it, I just laugh and lean in for another one. You can whip my ass at Soul Caliber all night and I don't even mind losing because I'm losing to you. You took a piss in the bushes in front of my house the other night and told me you were marking your territory... most people would think that was weird. Somehow I was flattered. You tease me about my big ass and wild hair, and I'm just glad you noticed.

 

Yea... I'm completely gaga for you.

[Cynder]

You text me earlier complaining about being out of tobacco. I know you were hinting at me buying you some. I told you then that I am broke. You text me now wanting to borrow money. Jesus would you give it a freakin' rest!? I'm not you damn ATM!!! I'm sorry you lost your job but good Gods. You lost it because blow was more important and because you couldn't handle your boyfriend being away in prison. So instead of just writing him letters and waiting out his whole sentence of TWO MONTHS and saving your money for the two of you to get a place together when he comes home, you are turning into a god damn cokehead and it's PISSING ME THE HELL OFF!!! Why can't you get it together? Please...? For him. For ME! I love you like a sister and I HATE seeing you do this to yourself. But I know there's nothing I can do...

 

I'm so sorry for what happened to you... but it's not my job to be your scaffold. I miss the person you used to be.

 

I used to hear that song Under my Umbrella and think of you.

 

"When the sun shines, we'll shine together

Told you I'll be here forever

Said I'll always be a friend

Took an oath I'ma stick it out till the end

Now that it's raining more than ever

Know that we'll still have each other

You can stand under my umbrella

You can stand under my umbrella"

 

But now I'm wondering if getting rained on might be what you need.

[Cynder]

I saw Iron Maiden in 2010 and I looked at the setlist tonight because I was trying to figure something out. Dance of Death was on it. That makes me sad. Why? Because I was there at that show and I don't remember them playing it. I didn't get drunk that night... why in the hell can't I remember my favorite song by them (and one of my favorite songs ever of all time) being performed that night? Did they skip it? I didn't have much to drink that night. This is just strange. Either way though... makes me sad that I was there when this song was played and don't even have any recollection of it.

 

They aren't done touring. They are touring in 2012 from what I hear. And DoD is a classic, so I'm sure I'll see it again. I don't miss them when they come to my city. I've seen them many times.

[Cynder]

Listen assklown, it doesn't matter if you've worked here three months longer than me. I'm still in quality control and there's an issue with the quality of your parts. I tried to be nice but you wanted to cuss ans call me names. Sucks that you got wrote up. (Actually no it doesn't...) I was only doing my job.

[Cynder]

As if you weren't already awesome... you can cook too.

[Cynder]

People keep pointing out that its Friday. I remember when Friday was a good day for me. Now its just another day... when you work every day there is no weekend. The days all just run together.

[FarthestEdge]

Aren't there labour laws prohibiting your employer from making you work 7 days a week????

 

Hope you're getting overtime to save up for your trip.

[Cynder]

I don't know about labor laws against it. This company has a huge turnover rate because of the long hours and lack of days off. The pay is excellent which at least makes it worth something. I did find out today that I have Sunday off though. So I can't complain too loud.

[Cynder]

I am amazed by my continuing apathy toward B... I feel bad for not feeling bad enough, really. I know thats probably a strange concept.

 

He told me he might stop over and see me tonight. I don't care either way. If he does he's not getting laid, hope he won't be too disappointed. I'm saving all my *lay* for tomorrow night.

 

I haven't had sex since before the 4th of July. I am about to blow up my humming bird... (For anyone who doesn't know, that's a type of vibrator.) I still kick myself for not sleeping with Aaron when he was practically begging me for it. I think about that every day... but I don't guilt myself too much. I didn't have protection on me and that was that. But Gods he can be persuasive...

 

He invited me over tomorrow night to watch Meet The Feebles... I've seen it, he hasn't. Honestly though, I don't care if the movie gets watched or not. I've decided tomorrow night is the night. Unless one of us ends up violently ill or passed out, it's on.

 

I'm still confused by him a little... He says he wants a FWB, which is fine. But then he acts like he likes me. The other night when I was down at the tavern with him he introduced me to a whole bunch of his friends down there and stuff. An ex girlfriend of his showed up down there even, and he introduced me to her. Then when we were sitting there he kept putting his hand on my knee and squeezing my leg.

 

The other night sitting around the fire, he took my hand and held it for a few minutes then told me he wasn't comfortable holding it. I gave him a hard time about it in a joking kind of way. I was like "Well you grabbed it." *laugh*

 

Idk... he's probably just as confused by me. He knows I'm attracted to him. But he probably has no idea to what degree. Maybe tomorrow night we can both set each other straight after the multiple orgasms that will no doubt be had.