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  1. Hi, I've seen a girl on a dating website which I'd like to get to know better. The issue is, is that the membership fee to send a message is £40.00. She's the only girl I'm intending to message so seems a bit of a waste. I looked her up on Facebook and she has a profile there. I'm wanting to message her and just say that I've seen her profile on the dating site. My message: Hi NAME, I'm Tom, I saw your profile on NAME dating site and thought I'd say Hi!. Apologies if this is a bit forward, I just felt I had to try and reach out to you. Many Thanks, Tom
  2. Title of this thread is the same as my blog... except the after dark part. I added After Dark because I most likely will write about things here that I don't write about in my Blog. Here I am anonymous... there I'm not. So, now it's time to work my nerves a bit... To M... Posting on facebook that you started your rag... Really? While your at it why don't you just post pics of some used tampons for all our enjoyment. To B... The things you do that used to annoy me so much are starting to annoy me less and less. But, it's not that I've had a change of heart and see the error of my ways or anything... It's just that I CARE less and less. Also to B... While you are sitting on your ass talking/typing about all the things you want to do, I am actually out doing the things I want to do. But you continue to criticize me. To AZ, Would you be my friend at all if I didn't make good money? I love hanging out with you, but anymore every time I see you you expect me to spend it on you. To A... this isn't working my nerves. But I still want to say it. Thank you for making me feel the way you have these last couple days.
  3. Well ,it looks like my hand may be pushed faster then I think . I heard a rumour ,yes ,you have to love the rumour mill that our new building is going to be condemned . I had to talk to my boss today and yesterday she told me we plan to re-start in 2 weeks and today she tells me we don’t know what we’re doing yet . So obviously the rumour mill is true . Thank Jesus I applied for unemployment ! A friend added me to all the Facebook child care sites and buy and sells. Unfortunately, my boss is on all the childcare sites . She’s going to know my plan eventually .
  4. i was fine all weeked plus yesterday for the most part, but today i am really struggling. i will not break NC- which also means i wont look at her myspace, facebook or aim profile, but i am dying here i just wanna leave work and scream this is driving me so crazy. i cant call any friends because i cant talk on the phone at work and i feel like i am losing my minddddddddddd uggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
  5. Hey, Facebook and poking is a little five minutes ago, but I'm wondering... I like this boy in my class and we always make eye contact (he comes in late or I come in late) and we'll stand in the doorway and scan the auditorium for seats and inevitably make eye contact. Also I am a cute girl (I mention that because ugly people poking good looking people on facebook is just unrealistic and sad.) Also after class he was getting coffee and I was getting coffee and he held the door open for me and tried to initiate a conversation but I was shy and acted like I had to be somewhere. So I'm wondering if you think it would be okay to poke him on facebook and message him and ask him out? Or should I chill and see if he talks to me again??? I'm pretty damn sure if I poked him and asked him to hang out this weekend he would be into it, but maybe I should chill and see what happens (in person not on the internet.) Whats your opinion of poking on facebook in these types of situations?
  6. So I'm dealing with this no contact thing to try to give her the space that she needs. I find myself thinking of calling her after class like I used to just to tell her about my day and how things went etc. But I've managed to restrain myself. I haven't texted or sent anything via AIM or Facebook so I'm proud of myself at this point. I'm just wondering how long I'm going to be able to handle it and if anyone has stuff they do to keep there minds off breaking NC??? I already run and lift weights to release frustration and take my mind off things, but any helpful ideas or advice to keep my mind off things and making a stupid decision and contacting her will be great.
  7. Someone sent me this song on FB, I'm not sure what this lyrics mean.... so help me? link removed ​ It hurts when I breathe It hurts when I speak You want everything I own Everything you wanted I keep running away, running away, running away You keep fading away, fading away, fading away It always ends in the same way The sun gets in your eyes I won’t be surprised that next time These blue eyes came out of the blue Out of the blue, blue, blue [Verse 2] It never gets old It never changes Does it Airport to city The moment is breaking my promise So I keep drifting away, drifting away, drifting away And you keep fading away, fading away, fading away It always ends the same way The sun gets in your eyes I won’t be surprised the next time But these blue eyes came out of the blue Blue, blue, blue [Verse 3] It hurts when I breath It hurts when I speak Still want it Everything I own Everything you wanted I keep running away, running away, running away You keep fading away, fading away, fading away It always ends the same way The sun gets in your eyes I won’t be surprised the next time But these blue eyes It always ends in the same way The sun gets in your eyes But these blue eyes came out of the blue Out of the blue, blue, blue Blue, blue, blue
  8. Hi I dont know if I am reading too much into it. There is this really cute guy who works out at my gym. I used to find him staring at me once in a while. Maybe that is just casual. After a few days I just poked him on facebook and he added me as his friend. Next time I saw him, I just ignored and him and went on with my usual business. He came over , introduced himself and started talking for a while. The next time he met me after a week, he started chatting about what I do and what he does etc... He asks about my family and stuff... He never asked for my number. I am a little confused over here. Is he just having a friendly conversation or is he tryin to hit on me. I think he is really cute, would like to get things moving. How do I find it out?
  9. My girlfriend and I have been together for 5 years and she is a wonderful girl that I lvoe very much. However, she does not trust me, and I suppose rightfully so. Two years ago I cheated on her after she went far away to college. I did not sleep with the other girlm but we did make out. After I told her about it she wanted to know the password to my email, myspace, facebook, and wanted to check my phone bill online to see who I called and how often. I of course understood where she was coming from so I gave it all to her. For awhile she checked these accounts everyday, but slowly she started letting go of the checking. It is now two years later and she asks me what my password is for my cell phone online account. I tell her honestly that I do not remember considering I never check my bill online I simply check my balance from my phone. She then urges me to call and have them reset the password so that I can then give it to her. However, I do not feel the need to. I feel that it has been long enough and I have proven my lvoe for her in these years after i told her about my infidelity that she shouldnt need to check my phone bill. I am not hiding anything but she now insists I am because I wont find out the password for her. Is this wrong of her?
  10. there is a girl in one of my classes that I think is very cute. There have been very few occasions where we have talked at all (just questions about class material really). I used to sit by her but now these other guys do. when I did sit by her for some reason I thought she was interested in me. She would constantly look back, at the clock and then me, and she sat right in front of me and would flip her hair constantly though I could be just imagining. She used to be very quiet but she talks more now (though not to me). I've read and been told that first impressions are important; so do I have less of a chance getting to know her if I all of a sudden start talking to her more after being so queit myself? I only ask because if I really wanted to talk to her it would probably have to be before/after class and like most people in the class they zip away when class is over. So I guess I'd have to catch her before class. I felt like doing this because lately she has been talking to other guys in class and surprisingly it has made me jealous. How well should I know her before asking her to hang out? This all just seems awkward to me because I've sat next to her for like close to 2 months and have barely said a word. Also, I was looking at her facebook page and it says "in a relationship" but there are no pics of her boyfriend; is there a chance she is actually single? I would still like to get to know her if she does, if just to be friends.
  11. so i was just wondering, how many of you that are attached would go out on a solo date with a member of the opposite gender who you know has interest in you. by that i mean he/she specifically asked you out, or mentioned the word date when asking you out? i ask this cause recently i went out with a girl and just asked for a second date in which she said yes to. now i find out she has facebook, and her status says she's in a relationship... one thing thats bothering me though is in the month span that i have hung out with her the boyfriend (if there is one) has never popped up.. she's not the most outgoing of all people... any advice?
  12. I've really been trying to figure out what this means. Please help. Heres the background on us, we use to work together and from that we got real cool. And he would talk to me about his gf and there problems and I would talk to him about my bf at that time and our problems. About 2 months ago he quit his job and so now I barely talk to him. About a week ago I talked to him and asked how him and his girl were doing and he said he hadnt talked to her in like 3 days and I was telling him he needs to call her and he said no he wanted to wait and see what she was going to do. They've been going through some things for quite a while now. So last night when I got off work he sent me a message and this is the conversation that we had: Me (1:37:42 AM): u had to work today? Him (10:38:22 PM): no Me (1:38:57 AM): oh your lucky. what did u end up doing? Him (10:39:20 PM): I'm at the bar right now eating pizza Me (1:39:39 AM): u have a sidekick now or something? Him (10:39:47 PM): yea Me(1:39:56 AM): I see you. Him (10:40:17 PM): not really I only have a 2 Me (1:40:20 AM): Save me some pizza I'm hungry too! Me (1:40:31 AM): y did u leave Nextel? Him (10:40:45 PM): its free so I can't, I still have nextel 2 Me (1:41:05 AM): Ballin! Him (10:41:06 PM): come get a bite from my house Him (10:41:18 PM): not really Me (1:41:33 AM): LoL, okay I'm coming! Him10:41:46 PM): u playin Me (1:41:48 AM): You get free pizza at the bar? Me (1:41:54 AM): yeah Him (10:41:55 PM): yea Me(1:42:02 AM): I didnt know that Him (10:43:37 PM): I'm bored u wanna come over and entertain me Me (1:43:51 AM): LoL entertain u how? Him (10:43:57 PM): idk Me(1:44:16 AM): What have u been drinking? Him (10:44:32 PM): I had 2 beers Me (1:44:44 AM): U by yourself? Him(10:44:54 PM): yea Him (10:45:03 PM): coronas Him (10:45:10 PM): that aint nothin Me (1:45:18 AM): Aww. poor baby. Y u by yourself? Him(10:45:43 PM): oh my roommate is driving so he might be home Me (1:45:59 AM): Who is your roommate? Him (10:46:10 PM): ****** Me (1:46:40 AM): oh Me (1:47:26 AM): U want me to come over for real? Him (10:47:51 PM): we bout to leave ill aim u when I get there Me (1:48:32 AM): U dont think your girlfriend gon mind if I come over at 2 in the morning? Him (10:51:28 PM): not really Me (1:53:04 AM): oh. what does not really mean? Him (10:53:51 PM): idk we going thru some thangs but we still coo and stuff Me (1:56:13 AM): So what r we going to do when I get over there? Him (10:56:40 PM): u have to entertain me Me (1:57:18 AM): what kind of entertainment r u talking about? Live entertainment? lol Him (10:57:31 PM): hell yeah Me (1:58:47 AM): Okay. Well what r lookin for its going to cost Me (1:58:52 AM): lol Him (10:59:01 PM): whomp whomp Him (11:01:45 PM): u got class tomorrow Me (2:01:56 AM): no Me (2:01:58 AM): u? Him (11:02:25 PM): yea 1020 and I have a quiz Him (11:02:33 PM): mth 124 Me (2:02:56 AM): O Him (11:03:05 PM): siiiiiike Me (2:03:43 AM): so u dont have class Him (11:04:05 PM): naw Me (2:04:58 AM): Oh ok Me (2:07:00 AM): what r u doing? Him (11:07:41 PM): just made it 2 the crib Him (11:08:07 PM): its kinda late so u don't have to come thru Me (2:09:00 AM): Or you just dont want 2 C me Him (11:09:47 PM): what r u talkin about Me (2:10:47 AM): Well 1 min u want me to come over and now you dont Him (11:11:18 PM): I mean I didn't know my roommate was gonna take that long Him (11:12:05 PM): awww u really wanted to c me Me (2:12:35 AM): U made me think you really wanted to see me Him (11:12:56 PM): girl be quiet Me (2:13:23 AM): lol Him (11:13:38 PM): I did but its late now if my roommate wasn't arguing with the bouncer then u would be here right now Me (2:15:52 AM): Oh okay. Him (11:17:14 PM): r u on facebook right now Me (2:17:25 AM): yeah Me (2:17:29 AM): why? Him (11:17:56 PM): add my roommate as ur buddy real quick Me (2:19:10 AM): is it a pic of his arm with a tat? Him (11:19:20 PM): yea Me (2:21:46 AM): y did u want me to do that? Him (11:22:46 PM): so I can look at it Me (2:23:06 AM): Oh. Me (2:23:17 AM): y u not on facebook anymore? Him (11:23:41 PM): idk Him (11:23:48 PM): take to much time Me (2:26:59 AM): Your quiet Me (2:27:06 AM): whats wrong? Him(11:27:06 PM): sorry Him (11:27:16 PM): no reason Me (2:30:53 AM): So what do u have up 4 this weekend? Him (11:31:28 PM): work and chill and study because I have exam next week thursday Me(2:32:30 AM): Yeah I feel you I have 2 exams the end of this month Me (2:32:49 AM): I'm going to be studying too, and I have another one Feb 8 Him (11:34:10 PM): crazy Me (2:34:32 AM): yeah I know Him (11:34:45 PM): I'm bout to go to sleep my head hurting and I'm tired Me(2:35:11 AM): Ok. Sweet Dreams Him (11:35:29 PM): thanks Him(11:35:36 PM): u 2 Me (2:35:41 AM): k So then the next day I instant messaged him and said hi and asked him was he feeling better (talking about the headache) and he said yea. Then he said "aye, thanks." And I said for what, and he said for checking up on him. I said no problem and then soon after that I got off the computer. But what the heck is going on? Does this mean he likes me? Or do you think he was drunk? I asked all my male friends and they said u not going to get drunk off 2 cornas and so I dont know. I havent talked to him since yesterday and he's online now and he hasnt instant messaged me all day so I'm kinda thinking he doesnt like me now. Please help. What should I do? What did he mean when he said they (him and his gf) going thru some stuff but they cool. Oh he isnt the type of person who would want me to come over there and have sex so I dont think that was the reason for him wanting me to come over. He's not that type of guy.
  13. I realized this is why I'm so hesitant to date this guy... he seems like a player. Although we have amazing chemistry, get along great, there's definitely physical & intellectual attraction...I get the sense that he really wants sex and I'm not sure I see this as a long-term thing. Hard to say at this point. I can tell he'd want to move fast though since there is this sexual attraction between us. Note that I am a virgin and a bit more conservative about sex in that I want to wait until I'm comfortable with the guy and there is a trust between us. I still feel wary about the whole 'trust' issue. If anyone cares why, first he blew off our plans yesterday for meeting....he was supposed to get back to me about a time to meet since he was studying with a friend yesterday, he never did. I took that as standing me up in a way. Then he goes on MSN late last night, messages me like 'hey -- how was your day?" I proceeded to give him a hard time like 'good thing you have a cell phone, you should learn how to use it' type of thing. But I still like him. He seems like a player though because his profile on Facebook says he's single and looking for "random play" and his status on Facebook before he messaged me was "browsing lavalife (for theurepeutic purposes only)". Like yeah, very clever but don't give me that BS when you broke our date. So you get the sense that he's very "confident" in the least. Anyway... he said he was really sorry, got studying with a friend (sorta lame excuse) but he wanted to meet me today and he'd make it up (by studying in the law library, if any of you have been reading past posts of mine you'll know what that means...) I was like "yeah I'll see if I can find your phone number tomorrow. ciao." I have not yet called him. I really like him, but am a bit scared. We have this tension going which is great, but....maybe he's just doing it to amplify sexual tension? I don't know. I want to date him but I'm scared he just wants to use me for sex. Any thoughts/opinions would be much appreciated with this. I just feel conflicted because I would even love to have sex with him, but I don't want to get hurt. Additionally, there is another great guy who asked me out but we're going to go out after exams are done. I can potentially see that as being long term..but we haven't started dating yet. He's just really genuine and nice, intelligent and good-looking too.....but maybe not the same sexual chemistry as of yet.
  14. Hey all, just wanted to get a thread started on this topic. I find myself having the bad habit of checking my ex's facebook page. I dont see anything that absolutely shows shes with someone else, but I do tend to take anything I cant pin the meaning down of as suggesting such. This is really a bad idea. First, anything that an ex might post that you can see which suggests being with someone else is IMO put there to mak eyou jealous. Although this stings, it just shows that your ex is denying their feelings and trying to feeel better by trying to trap you to gush out your feelings. If an ex is posting something about a serious fling or relationship they are having, they clearly dont have any respect for you. Even if you shouldnt be checking their page, that still is not cool. Besides, I feel that if you are genuinely happy with someone you have no need to broadcast it - especially to your ex. Again, that just shows how they are still caught up on you. Anyone have any further comments on this?
  15. So the EX and I have been broken up for about 2 months now. One of the reasons why we broke up was because she's studying abroad in Italy for three months. Before she left for Italy she had promised that she was going to email me how she felt and what not. She did'nt end up emailing me until now. This is the email: So I am sorry I never wrote that emial before I left, I just couldn't bring myself to. But all I was going to say was that I love you, I really do and if we were to ever get back together in the future that would be great, but I think these three months being apart is kinda something that we needed you know? No matter what I am always going to love you cause you are my best friend. It was very hard to say goodbye to you that night, I have never cried so much in my life. But yea, so I miss you and maybe when I get back we can see where things are at?I am trying to come home for fall break because everyone else is leaving and I do not want to stay here by myself so maybe I can see you in october, if not def. december when I get home. Have a good semester and hopefully we can talk through email, I have been trying to go NC with her so I deleted her off of my myspace and facebook. I guess when she found out she sent me another email: okay so listen, i am guessing you are pissed at me, thats why i never wanted to send you that email but figured i had to, i am really homesick and just want to stay in contact with you, please don't cut all ties from me which i feel like you have since you deleted me from your facebook and myspace, what the hell was up with that, can we please just stay friends, please, you mean the world and more to me even if we are not together, i understand if you are mad at me, but please email me back and explain, i feel you at least owe me an explanation of everything and why you did that. I really dont know what to email her back. I mean yes I still love her and have feelings for her (We were together for 4 years). At my mindset right now I would get back together with her but Id rather not get my hopes up.
  16. Hi guys, Well, I'm that same person that has been going through my healing process and I actually have news..I like a guy. But I don't think he even remembers that I exist. And what's pretty bad about this is that when I was in a relationship with that cheater, this guy actually attempted to speak to me a few times but I was too shy and I didn't really want to converse with any other guys other than my ex bf. But I actually did think the guy was cute back then. And another thing is that last spring semester was his last semester...he graduated! Which is great for him but my chance is ruined. Well..I actually just sent him a message on facebook (right now) and his status says that he's single and looking for a relationship, but I think a girl has been trying to get into a relationship with him or talk to him (by the messages that she's sending him). I'm not sure. But if she is, then that means I'm too late and I missed my chance which is pretty depressing. Bah! It's just not fair how even my disgusting cheater ex boyfriend is with someone and has someone that "loves" him and I have no one. I'm so ashamed of having been with my disgusting ex boyfriend for so long. Actually, a friend of mine today, sent me a message on Facebook because he noticed that I was single and asked me what happened and I told him that my ex was a cheater and he left me. And I couldn't help but to feel embarrassed when I said that. I really feel like I'm a failure because I usually never ever give up on anything but I had no control over this.
  17. Oh, ow. I didn't go seeking this one out, but while I was casually surfing link removed, I ran into a wall post from the ex's new girl, who was posting on a male mutual friend's page. I'd made sure to block the ex on Facebook, but not the new girl, thinking that I wouldn't be seeing much of her anyway since she's not in my university network. Anyway... here I was, thinking I was healing and getting over it all, and noticing she's "friended" this guy, hearing about her picking him up from the airport, seeing her mention my ex by name, somehow elicited a strong reaction from my gut. From what I'd heard originally through the grapevine, this guy was really against my ex getting with this new girl so quickly, but now he's "friends" with her. I feel a bit like I've lost an ally of sorts. I have no blinking idea why my reaction was so extreme, since I've been feeling incredibly positive and happy recently, feeling more "over it" than ever, and then all it takes is seeing the new girl's comment on my friend's wall and my stomach suddenly does backflips and a strange feeling runs up my back. It's been nearly 6 months since my ex of 1 yr 8 mos dumped me, and around 2 months since my ex started seeing this new girl. I thought I'd really gotten over the initial shock of seeing them listed as being "In A Relationship" together on Facebook (no, I do have a life offline I'd worked up the courage to block his profile around a month ago and thought it'd be the end of it. Before I'd finally decided to block him, I'd at least gotten to the point where looking at pics of them together didn't hurt me as much anymore. I've been trying for these 6 months of separation to "move on" as much as I can, but this is disheartening. There's a slim possibility that my ex and I will end up running into each other again in a year's time, when he returns to grad school and I keep going in my graduate work. I don't want to keep losing normal gastrointestinal function every time I run into him on campus, and if he brings her to visit..! Why did it hurt so much to see her face and read about her mentioning my ex by name? Is it because I haven't really let go enough yet, or is it a remembered reaction to the first time I saw her name and pretty much fell to pieces? And, if so... when will this end? Thank you all so much for your support...
  18. We found each other on facebook. I left my number on his wall. He called today and would it be cool if we hung out with my friend and his gf. We re getting tats and drinking.
  19. hi everyone ok, here's the background on my story. i met this guy at the very start of college. he is completely my type: tall, beautiful, skinny, talented, and very aloof (maybe the keyword!).. but the night he met he wouldn't stop talking to me. he seemed strangely smitten. my (equally attractive.. haha) roommate kept coming up to him to start conversation but he'd just turn back to me. he begged for my number, then texted me not much later that night! he even found my online journal via a link on my facebook, even though he doesn't have facebook.. i'm including all these details because they are very "unlike him" to be so persistent or socially aggressive, or so it seems and so say his friends. i never thought he would even speak to me once! anyway, he had a long distance girlfriend-dater-thingy at the time so we just sort of didn't pursue much, and i found a boyfriend very soonthereafter. i think he got embarrassed and we sort of got in this fight about all of that for a while, but that was a really long time ago. but i still think about him.. and since i may not come back to school here next year, i figured, "what the heck, i'm gonna ask him out." i just haven't talked to him in a really long time.. and he is very aloof. he's in a rock and roll band, he went to art high school (and he came out just like you'd expect) blah blah blah. but i'm nervous. for the first time since i can remember, i really fear rejection and humiliation from him. does anyone have any tips? i sort of feel like just calling him out of the blue and bein' like DINNER, JA?? but a part of me thinks i should maybe get to know him a little better before that. he did finally get facebook, so it's easier to contact him (and i know he's single!) help!! i was never afraid to ask a guy out until him!
  20. Just wondering is anyone here on facebook? This may be a silly question but I was wondering do you just add real life & close internet friends to your friendslist on facebook? or Friends & everybody? Would you add a friend to your list if you dislike, hate and/or didn't want to be their friend?
  21. So I have a question about my brother. I suspect that he likes his friend (who is gay) but he won't tell me directly. He drops hints but, as silly as it sounds, I knew something was up when he took off all his profiles (ie. MySpace, Facebook) that he was straight. My problem is, should I outright ask my brother or wait for him to tell me? I get the feeling he wants to tell me, but is nervous or scared to. Usually, we're both pretty open to each other for advice and just the general happenings in our lives. What do you all think?
  22. If you guys don't know my story, brief recap: G/f of 3 years broke up with me last September. Started dating someone 3 weeks after breaking-up with me. Tried the friends thing, which she REALLY wanted, wasn't working out for me. Hysterically cried twice when I told her I had to move on, and could not be her friend. She said she understood, although she didn't agree, and told me to call her if I ever changed my mind about being friends. Since then, she has taken the one picture she had up of me off her facebook account, and has recently put up on her facebook account that she is in a relationship with someone else. Why is she doing this? Is she trying to make me mad or jealous? We ended our last phone conversation on a good note, saying our goodbyes. Granted I shouldn't be looking at her account, but why is she rubbing it in my face?
  23. Know i know that some of you are going to read this and by the end of it are going to say that I was stupid and that what i thought was there was never even there to begin with but i thought it was and since i thought that the other person did as well i find myself hurt. Si I am a freshman in college. It is going great and I am having an absolute BLAST. I am sitting in a friends room one day and I go on my facebook to add one of them as a friend. When I log in I see that I have a friend request. It is a girl from indiana. she is a good friend from home of one of the girls whose room i was hanging in. So i didnt really this friend of hers so i flirted with her through messages on the website. That weekend I see she is online so I IM her and we talk a little bit. She is really nice and we hit it off really well. I go out that day and when I come home that night she is online and she IMs me. We end uo talking for 3 hours. As the convo evolves and we learn more about eachother it is obvious there is an attraction and stong emotions. I have never spoken to her as of yet and we both admitted it was weird to feel so strongly and never even know the other person. she kept saying how she missed me and wished i was there and all the dirty things she would do to me if i was. Since then we had talked everday. We knew that we both liked eachother. I didnt consider her my girlfriend since i am in new jersey. she said we would be together if I was there or if she was here. we would talk for hours about anything and nothing all night on the phone. I am the type of person that if i get to know you and i care about you that Ill tell you you can all me anytime day or night with your problems. No matter what happens i will always be there to help you. she had me calling her everyday at 7am to make sure she got up for class and i never had class before 10am. Things went every nicely for months. she would call me and i her all day long and it was nice to know that even she wasnt there physically we could tell eachother anything about our day when it was all over. she would call me if she was nervous about something, having a problem with anxiety this happened often, or if she had a bad dream and how she wished i was there to hold her in my arms. She was supposed to come out here with the girl we met through, her family, one weekend but couldnt because of an exam. Ok I didnt change anything for me cause I would care about her no matter what but i think it did a little for her. more time goes by and then she tells me that she has family out her in nj and that she is going to come and see them over her christmas break. AWESOME she is finally going to be here. Now please understand something. I am an honorable person. I am not some 30yr old in a wife beater with a beer can. All I wanted to do was see her just once and kiss her on the forehead and wrap my arms around her tight. I just wanted her to know how it felt for me to hold her and how she could feel safe there. and that no harm was ever going to come to her wilst i am there. I go home for break and a few days later I get an IM from this boy she met at a party a few weeks ago. She went out alot and i didnt care. there was nothing i could do so whatever. she made out with boys when she was drunk. yea i minded but i would rather her talk to me making out with boys then not at all. this kid tells me all these things about how she dosent want to talk to me and i am harassing her calling all the time when she has told me not to. she never told me not to. I am the type of person to listen when people talk. If she told me not to talk to her I would be gone as fast as i was there. blah blah how she is scared of me and all this * * * *. so i tell the kid that I wont talk to her if that is what she wants and what is going to make her happy. all i ever wanted was for her to be happy even if that meant she didnt talk to me anymore. a man of my word i didnt communicate with her at all until she sent me a message on facebook saying how she didnt know what happened and was mad and missed talking to me and was sorry. so that night i called her i know i should have but i missed her sooo much. talk to someone everyday for 4months and then not at all! I could deal. Things got better and she told me that that kid was an * * * and never asked him to say all those things. things back to normal and she is here in nj. she is too nervous to see me. I understand her having an anxiety problem and even though she has seen pics of me and heard my voice she dosent really know me. I am sensitive to this and say that if it is too much and she is too nervous then i understand. Dnt get me wrong I was hurt. She is 11.5 hrs away normally and at one point when we could have met up she was only an hour. But again whatever is going to make her happy. New years day I call her to ask her about her night of partying and make sure she is ok. I get a facebook message from that kid telling me he was going to go to the police cause i wrote on her wall (a public place to leave messages, cause she said no one was going to be upset if i did) and i am harassing her. I dont think he knew i was talking to her and she had contacted me. I havent spoken to her since then. the very last thing she said to me was how she didnt mind if i talked to her and not to worry about the other kid. I sent them both messages saying i didnt understand but if she obvoiously didnt want to talk to me then i would respect her wishes. as for the kid i tried to get him to explaine why it was his place to say what he was. he told me not to talk to him. all i ever wanted was for her to be happy. i just dont understand what i did wrong. i kept my word. Feel bad.... Stupid right? Anything good or bad will help...thanks for your time
  24. I am twenty-three years old. When I graduated from High School, I went to a local Community College because I was unsure of what exactly I wanted to do with myself. I stayed at home for those years I was there, and pretty much stuck to my guns (only two friends, kept to myself mostly, played video games a lot). Some years later, I decided what I wanted to do, and that the University of Colorado at Denver taught an excellent program (in fact, the only one in my state that is even plausible). I moved out of my parents house and into my own apartment in downtown Denver, as the college was non-residential. Long story short, I have two and a half years of college left, and I am lonely and wondering if I am missing out. I never got to live in any dorms, and while I used to feel that was a good thing, in retrospect I've realised that I've missed out on a lot of memories. These are supposed to be the best years of my life, and I have so few good memories of the past few years that, quite frankly, I am getting depressed and lonely. The easy answer to this is "Well, go make some friends!" I've tried. I'm a nice guy and I get along well with other people, but I've never been very adept at making lots of friends, and it's especially hard considering the nature of my campus. Good or bad, I feel like I am just missing out on so much, and it sucks. My ex girlfriend dumped me upon moving into the dorms in Boulder, and I know she's got so many friends and is having the time of her life. I am not comparing myself to her (or so I say, ugh), but I just wish I could myself have some wild memories to think back upon and smile at ten years from now, when I am graduated and off in the working world. I've considered many things; going to work at a local movie theatre (despite the abyssymal pay), even joining Facebook. The reason I haven't joined Facebook yet is because my ex- keeps a profile there as well, and considering we, more or less, go to the same university, I felt that the temptation to check up on her would've been too much for me. I feel now, after two months and two weeks of NC, that perhaps I am ready to try. She keeps a livejournal, which I have kept myself away from, so perhaps this wouldbe easy, too? Any suggestions?
  25. On multiple occasions at the beginning of our relationship. I mean, on our first date, when I mentioned I had a husky he brought up the ex and said that she had one too. I discovered that he absolutely hates his ex now (I'm guessing its the lack of closure as she broke up with him). He also popped up to her, in front of me saying he is with someone new. She doesn't want to speak to him, and replies with things such as 'what now', but when she was told he was with me, she says 'I thought you still wanted to be with me', to which he replied, 'I wasn't going to wait forever.' He popped up to her saying 'hi' when he was angry (after an argument we had), he said he speaks to her when he's angry. He also visited her mom's profile and new boyfriends. This was constant and obsessive. After my confrontation, he did block her, but what was his agenda in the first place? Surely she was still on his mind and that isn't fair to me , right?n He kept a facebook profile on an older account, full of pictures of them kissing, him dedicating birthday kisses- granted it wasn't in use by him, I confronted him and he said he completely forgot about it (I don't know if that is true to be honest), and he deleted the profile since. He still has their pictures in his emails though. I'm really conflicted because I've told him that I feel like a replacement, and he says I am not. Even though he wants to spend lots of time with me (almost been with him for a year now, and this what I mentioned before happened at the beginning of our relationship), and he paid for me to go on holiday with him, It looks like he is totally in love with me but he could be doing this because he knows he will never get her back.He says he would be chasing her if that was the case, but obviously he knows there is no chance with her considering she is with someone new, so maybe I am the next best thing? He says I wouldn't have paid for a holiday excetera, but I feel like he tried to rush into things as a distraction, as he said things to me at the beginning of the relationship like 'promise you won't leave me'. Please tell me, are my feelings rational? Because even though it appears all rosey, I am on the verge of breaking up as I don't want to be second best, I think I deserve more than that.
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