Post here instead of contacting your ex!

[sentencedtoagony]

sorry i got so jealous. but your problem with boundaries played into that.

[sentencedtoagony]

i wish i'd played it all off and waited for you to grow up. but would you have?

[SVSV]

You are self-centered.

 

Three months in and you say that you aren't attracted to me. Um, I didn't change.

 

You act like you deserve sympathy because you're seldom attracted to anyone. You say you're going to cry because you miss your ex.

 

Well, I guess I'm just chopped liver again.

[hear_her_roar]

You gave me an STD.

 

You told me you got tested right before dating me, and was clean. You told me you didn't cheat on me.

 

Well, I actually DID get tested before sleeping with you, and I know for a fact that I was clean. Yet, somehow, I still got an STD from sleeping with you. Wonder how that happened?

 

I've caught you in a lie and you continue to lie to me even now. Don't tell me you think you got it from a toilet seat - I'm not a twelve year old, I know that isn't possible. Don't tell me you're sorry right before saying you're done talking about it because it's not affecting you anymore.

 

And please, please stop saying you were clean. Even if that test was negative... you had a stringent physical involving a urine sample while we were dating. That would have shown something.

 

I hate that you've told everyone what a terrible girlfriend I was when you did this to me. I had an STD for MONTHS without knowing because of you.

 

I didn't think I could hate anyone... but I hate you. So. Much. I didn't love you in the first place, and I'm embarassed that I stooped so low as to date your sorry self.

[UpUpAndAway]

Do you do ANYTHING without getting high first?????

[belezah]

do not call to tell me how you are taking steps to fix your life.

i want to see the end result

[SeaBisquit]

thank u for this post. i would like to say to him. why was it necassary for you to do the things you did to me. you cheated on me you lied to me. i did everything for you and you walked off with another woman.

[Helpmetoheal]

I bet you just went on with your day like nothing happened. Probably laughing it up, seeing how much pain I was in. You must be a really sick individual. I thought you had a heart. This is mean but I hope someone does this to you one day. Multiply that by 100 and thats what you've done to me! You went from one addiction to another, talk to God you tell me, he won't let you be alone. You are such a hipocrite! At least you don't do things half assed huh, when you were a drunk you gave it 100% and now this new found love of God, well good luck with that! At least I am honest with myself.

[Wildflower88]

Ugh... I broke a rule and looked at your facebook. I see your baby was born... and I hate seeing you smile holding that baby. What makes it worse is the day he was born you texted me, telling me you still loved me and cared for me. I dont understand why.. why you cant go...why you cant just let me be done and over it. I know I broke up with you but after 6 years...there is and always will be emotion there... and I dont know how to just hate you, how to just wish you the worst in the world. I am tired of you being on my mind at random times during the day. I want to not care..I want to be RID of you. I hate that you want to be friends..I dont want to be your friend..I will be happy when this is the past...

[GetOverItPlz]

Wildflower,

 

The day you can truly move on is the day you stop wanting to wish the worst on someone you once loved. This is a lesson I had to also learn. At some point, you have to wish them the best. If you really cared about them, you should be happy they are happy, and stop trying to base your happiness around their ability to move forward and to love again. I just wrote a post in my healing thread about the good and the bad in people, and how to TRULY be healed, you have to acknowledge both what made them the villian and what made them your hero. Once you can accept both sides of the coin, you can smile about the good times and just take it as it comes.

 

Best of luck to you.

[Wildflower88]

thank you =)

[sdotcarter]

I want to call her so bad. Hear her voice. I want her back even after looking at our relationship through anothers eyes. I was used for convienance. But i want my girl back.

 

If any of you are bored, check my thread in this forum, give me some opinions. I need help because my friends are fine for it during the time im with them. Next day im tore up.

[belezah]

F-U and your boring chick that you're commenting the photos of, i look much much better wearing red lipstick than she does! and besides you can never have her coz she is way too rich to be with a loser like you. i was the only fool to take in a jobless lazy a** like you, thank god you opened my eyes!

[sfindependent]

hey baby.

 

what u up to? just thought i'd write to let you know i was missing you. I know we're not right together and you've found new friends to hang with and support you through this BU. Part of me is bitter you moved on so fast, but i know deep down you're missing me too. i hope one day you'll see the good i really was and I was just as f'd as you are. I hope you know u inspired me to be a better person and really look at myself and how bad i've led myself to get. I hope we both find ourselves looking at each other later on eye level, have let the bitterness go, and try at it again. But really, it's never going to work. ever.

[nutcase720532]

I miss you alot. I wish you could give me a chance to fix things, I know it would take more then just my effort to fix things but urs as well and at this time ur not ready to put in effort with me.. I love you and hope to hear for you soon.

[sentencedtoagony]

i loved you sooooooo much. we were great together until you took a * * * * on our love for no apparent reason.

[weaselgrater]

The Reality - Feb 22, 2011

 

The reality that you didn't love

me didn't hit me until

he had one of your legs lifted

and you tilted your head

back with your eyes closed.

 

Like a ton of bricks these images

destroyed my heart. You always

told me nasty things when

we faught. I thought everything you

said was just engineered to burn.

But the fire was real.

 

When I wanted to unite in bed

in arms and legs in love

you sighed angrily and lay

still like a zombie

and jumped out of bed when

I was done wasting your time.

 

Once upon a time you kissed me with

your eyes closed.

 

I remember when I tried to leave you.

Early on you would chase me down the road

hair in fist. I didn't manage to leave,

and then I fell in love.

 

You think I've been trying to get with

other girls. I have but only because

you were so cold. Your "sexual anorexia."

 

I didn't know that when you said

I haven't loved you for a year and a half

that you weren't just

trying to hurt me.

 

Suddenly your anorexia is cured,

and you don't cease to hurt me

even after you've invited me

out of guilt of leaving me

and you need me to

hate you.

 

You tell me that I am terrible in bed

and that he's all you ever wanted

and I see you sucking his * * * * in my head.

I see you with your loving eyes

that used to close when you kissed me.

 

I remember when you used to dig your finger

nails into my back and called my name.

Now its Tony's back

and Tony's name.

 

No more cuddling in pajamas in the lovesac

no more guitar hero.

No more quick pecks on the mouth that

I now understand were kisses that you

gave your best friend

and not your lover.

 

I love that you told me

that you were happy that I was

working on the relationship, while

you sought another.

Books on how to understand each other

and books on how to overcome the fact

that you hated to have sex with me.

 

I hope its because you weren't in love

with me. You have succesfully ruined

me under the guise of pretending to love

me and not giving a * * * * about me at all.

 

I can't believe that little piece of * * * *

who * * * * ing told you to get out of your

clothes in the mall while I was there

will take your clothes off everynight

Which is something I couldn't beg you

no matter how nice or what I did for you.

 

Its sickening that a pick up artist has

taken you from me. He has two and even

maybe three facebook profiles, and is

so egotistical he probably

can't love another more than himself

which is something I want to be able to feel

no matter how far I'll fall if I am

once again destroyed.

 

I will * * * * Lorenza, and you will see that

he wishes he could have done the same

and you will feel stupid.

 

Sometimes I want you to feel better, and move on

from caring about you at all. I have the answers

to ease your guilt, and I want to help you

but you tortured me so much that despite

my overwhelming kindness, I want you to suffer.

 

I never said things that would cut you down.

I never explicitly saught your

achilles heel insecurities.

You were an emotional sharpshooter.

I never told you that your vagina was like roast beef

when I knew how much you were afraid of it looking ugly.

I never yelled and said that I hoped that I had

caused your womb to be indefinitely barren.

 

Tony is funnier than me? Smarter? More interesting?

What am I? What is my purpose?

I miss the future we had.

 

I miss thinking about when we both had our

new professional jobs, and finding a new place

to live. I miss arranging our home

and seeing you everyday after school

and talking about it.

 

I miss your body in the morning when I wake up

and your feet twitching against me when

we went to sleep.

 

I miss your beautiful breasts that once were

mine to hold each night

They now frequent Tony's mouth.

 

I can't even tell you how to imagine

if you were starting to consider marriage

that you found out I was

in love with another woman

behind your back

and you saw me love her,

closed eyes and full of butterflies

and with not a single shred of

love left for you.

I hope that one day instead of succesfully

fleeing your own fears, you do manage to

fall in love and when you are trying your best

to make it work, you find that

he was emotionally checked out

a year and a half ago.

 

I miss your beautiful skin

and watching your brother begin to

adore you and feeling happy that

I had such great in-laws to look forward to.

 

I think about the children we might have had.

How smart they would be, even if we were

wrong for each other, like my dad and my mother.

 

I see all these memories of you and me

and cut myself and paste Tony.

 

Disney world, sex on the lake, the home videos

I started to make.

 

Trash all trash now.

 

I remember that you never trusted me.

How could you love me? I tried so hard

to let you love me. I loved you.

 

When you got mad you told me you didn't love

me and it was true. How can you do that?

Were the other things true too?

 

You shouldn't have left me for another person.

Or encourage me to repair the relationship.

It really adds insult to injury.

Oh and letting me giving you head without

letting me know exactly how much you love

the other person, and then insulting my

sexual ability! And asking me to get you

birth control because of 'emotional unstability'?!

 

I can't believe how much you lie to me!

I have no idea how much of everything was a lie.

I can't believe that if I hadn't read your texts

I wouldn't have known that you were asking me

to pick up your meds so you could * * * *

without condoms! And you went off birth control with me.

 

Not to mention that you laughed at me for taking a nap

in the mattress you * * * * ing asked me to sleep in

(the night before when you were guilty and afraid)

just so I could avoid traffic to get to the * * * * ing

home that I had to move to because you refused to leave.

 

You want to talk about respect? Here I find you so

impossibly stupid or simply unbelievably selfish

and hurtful and mean.

 

What's with the TV thing?! You know I never ask you for

money for all the * * * * you buy, and you always

got upset if I did because were a couple.

But look. Were not.

 

You're * * * * ing twisted. I have no * * * * ing idea

what is going on in your head, that you think

that I disrespect you in any way whatsoever

let alone more than you have treated me!!!

 

Your taking the HEPA filter?

I would never say no to your health!

Did you really only care about

the possessions?

 

You acted so shocked when I asked

for my favorite sunglasses back

the ones I decided to give you

out of all the love in my heart

for you. You asked me for them

when you already were loving him

and when I knew, you were upset

that I took them back.

 

During that month that you

were falling for Tony

you woke up twice

in the middle of the night

and slept talk to me

as if I was your mother.

Now I see how you saw me

and why you didn't * * * * me.

[HeartBeat]

I feel so used. You knew I ran back to you, so you said lets go out and have a good time. You took advantage of me. You used my feelings for your selfishness. I am not playing yo yo with you when I say I love and I hate you or good bye but come right back THAT day. Because I get crushed. And don't want to feel hurt. I am emotional. I don't think before I act. But it seems my heart got me into trouble. Now you don't have time for me. I feel like I ruined everything again. I don't know if I am blaming myself or really am holding on for another reason. If we were just on the same page. I want to feel what it was like before. It was hard to move so fast with our history. And when I get to the point of opening up...I'm the reason why you don't want me? ... how come I can't just be on your mind as much as you are on mine? Why don't you go crazy over loosing me too? God, you just don't care do you??!!!

[Flint_Wood]

I hope you treat this new guy better. Seriously, get over yourself and treat him right.

[Robin2904]

I kinda miss you tonight. I'm okay though- its not a painful feeling like it was not long ago, but more of a mild ache in my chest. I watched The Oscars tonight and posted that I couldn't wait to see what everyone was wearing on Facebook. Your sister liked my post. Kinda made me smile. Made me think of how me, your mom and Moll all sat and watched The Golden Globes in January- the last night I was at your house. Then it made me sad. That was the night of that GOD aweful fight for us. Where you let me cry and just didn't care. I still remember the cocky look on your face, how much you hurt me. How you just didn't seem to care about me at all.

 

Then I had to go back into the living room with them and finish watching the show and pretend like I was okay. We all made our prediction on what movie we thought would win the Golden Globe, and we all made little bets that we would have to do if the other person lost. Molly's was so silly- that we had to all give her dog attention if she won. Your mom's was something like- if she won she and Moll would have to come out to NY and spend the day with me, and mine was that we would all have to go see a movie together and I would get to choose the movie. Its funny because I had such a bad time with you that weekend, but I had so much fun with them that night! And at that moment I was SO greatful that they were both there and we were watching the awards- it took away just how heart broken I was from what happened with you and I.

 

I felt like SUCH a part of the family that night. Kinda makes me sad now because- well I'm not part of the family. But I still love your sister and your mother. I often wonder if Molly has any idea what happened between us, since she is still friends with my on Facebook. she still will comment my page now and again, like my statuses. I have to wonder....And I do really care about your mom despite everything your mom and I went through and GOD knows it was ALOT- Hell she was the reason we broke up in the first place! Who would have thought huh? She hated me SO much last year, made my life HELL at times, and then she went and told me she was wrong, that she loved me, missed me. She cried on the phone that day because she felt so awful- she felt responsible for us not being together I bet. I know she wished you and I could have worked it out.

 

Some days I just think about writing your mom an email- just to say hi. She used to send me emails every now and then, but she's stopped. I guess she realized its really a done deal this time. I even thought about reaching out to your sister, but don't want to make myself look dumb. Just to ask her how you are. Kinda pathetic huh?

 

I do miss you, I miss what we had. But you know what? That was in the passed now. It will never be like that between us again. Kinda kills me to even write that, but I know its true. I still- in the very very bottom of my heart secretly hope that who knows- maybe one day we'll find each other again, but I won't hold my breath. Your a really messed up person. I see that. You have a lot of issues- anger issues, and just things you need to deal with. I think for a minute I thought my love could fix that, but I see now that was very flawed way of thinking. Who knows if you will ever recognize your problems and work to fix them. My money is on not. But its not my job to fix you.

 

Goodbye Mikey.

[DrKitten]

You're so weird... I'm morbidly curious about what's going with you, especially with your cyptic facebook posts. Maybe you know that and are trying to entice me to talk to you? I dunno, but I'm not contacting you.

 

It would be an unfortunate surprised if you really are engaged to her. That would mean she has the control and you really don't know how to stand up for yourself. Are you really that desperate to be married? How sad for you.

[Helpmetoheal]

I hope you had a great weekend, I bet you did. Probably just pushed me right out of your mind and thoughts like you do so easily. How are you so cold? I could have never watched someone go through what I did on friday night without it having an effect on me. Guess it proves what I have been trying to ignore for the last 2 months. Good luck calling me tomorrow, and I know you will, you have to. One little piece of me left for you to "deal with" then you can run along on your merry way. Well guess what? I blocked your number, when you call you will hear this: "The person you are tyring to contact is not accepting calls from this number". Have a great time wondering, waiting and hoping!!! You deserve it! I'll show you who is not good enough for whom anymore. An old Elton John song comes to mind about now, you know which one hunny??? Thats right, "The * * * * * is Back!" I am who I am, I refuse to try to be someone else. So fasten your seatbelt its gonna be a bumpy ride. Oh yeah, I can still drive, sorry you lost your license you poor sick alcoholic!

[hardbodyblonde]

I want to call him, see him, touch him, smell him... I miss my best friend...Its been 5 days and I am trying hard to remain strong! I am utterly devastated and lost without him

[hardbodyblonde]

I love you, I need you back

[Psychgirl24]

I'm still so angry at you for just giving up on me. Clearly, I wasnt worth the effort. That should be enough to make me forget about you...but it's not.