THE NO CONTACT CHALLENGE, Part 2

[MisSunny]

Happy Birthday!!

 

I hope he textes you regardless of why. It would be a friendly gesture =)

 

My B-Day was last Monday and he texted me about it....

Still miss him also and wish there was more but since then things have already gone downhill.

 

Either way it is Day 2 for me, lets try to do it together, I have tried too many times and had to restart. It sucks...

 

Well... He did contact me this morning, and since I was drunk/hungover I replied.

 

It was so much easier when I was positive he wouldn't say anything back if I said anything. This is so, so much harder... And I feel very very foolish. I don't understand him right now, but I really need to stop trying. I'm just letting this fuel my unrealistic expectations, and it sucks. So... Today is actually Day 0. Hopefully I can do better from now on.

[IAmFCA]

39/28/14

 

Don't know why you are on my mind lately. I waffle between thinking you are happily involved with someone and that you are thinking of me. Maybe or it's bOth.

 

No matter. Until you see for yourself the deep need leftover from your mom, then the rest is just layers. I Don't know if you will look. I saw you looking a bit. Good luck.

[js0905]

Well... He did contact me this morning, and since I was drunk/hungover I replied.

 

It was so much easier when I was positive he wouldn't say anything back if I said anything. This is so, so much harder... And I feel very very foolish. I don't understand him right now, but I really need to stop trying. I'm just letting this fuel my unrealistic expectations, and it sucks. So... Today is actually Day 0. Hopefully I can do better from now on.

 

 

Hi MisSunny,

 

Don't feel bad I started to think that he just didn't get my cute pic on Friday and this is why he hadn't replied. (How I lie to myself.)

Regardless of if he did get it or not I should of left it at that but nope. I wasn't drunk or hangover but decided to send him more pic's and tell him I was thinking of him.

Yes, I have lost all self respect and now feel like crap again. So I sent him one at 10am then a couple of more with a kiss emoticon in the afternoon. The last one said "I'm done for today...LOL!! with a wink emoticon. (I tried to play it off as me been funny and not totally needy) I'm sure he saw right through that and btw still hasn't replied.

 

It's now 6:15pm EST and if I don't hear from him today I need to let him go. That is what I should of done 7 months ago when things started going to crap.

 

So I'm at day "0" now myself.......

[MisSunny]

Haha, what a coincidence. My ex asked me to send him a recent picture of myself for my caller id on his phone because the one he has "doesn't do me justice"... I'm not gonna send him one, though. It's hard. At times I think maybe he's contacting me for good reasons. Then I switch to thinking that he's only talking to me to soothe his guilt, and it makes me feel sick. It's not very pleasant... And I didn't have this much trouble with NC the first time around! Lame sauce. Well. Day 1 for me.

[IAmFCA]

40/29/15.

 

nothing.

 

how you gonna win when you aint right within.

 

gotta get right.

[sadbutrue]

Day 13

 

 

I broke nc several times because he texted me ... and I texted him back

[MisSunny]

Woke up to a text message from him asking if I would like to go to a movie tonight... I wonder what he wants from me?

 

I DO wanna see a movie... But not with him right now. It would be way too weird. Plus I'm a sickie right now, so... I have not replied. Ugh.

[IAmFCA]

40/29/15.

 

nothing.

 

how you gonna win when you aint right within.

 

gotta get right.

 

Yo, me: stick to your plan. He was a harbinger of great things to come. Trust in the process. This is good work.

[IAmFCA]

41/30/16

 

Two more weeks and it will be straight 30+s and nearly Xmas. My first weekend off. I will have learned more what I can do with J. You will be turning the year without contacting me. You told me you were not available, but I feel your involvement with someone. And why not. Women require things from you and you walk. I think now, you are trying not to walk.

 

On my mind you are. Maybe because I want your validation? Or for who you are? Or both? Oh well, time for me go make a difference.

[IAmFCA]

42/31/17

 

I really want you to reach out to me. I really really do. My wingman says "If I knew you had a crazy ex, I wouldn't call you." I know. I know this is true. I think I have it covered now. But I am still not comfortable leaving my car at Mr G's house, presuming I spend much time there next _. And now, maybe, I have two. I want to call you, pretend nothing has happened, move on. But its too soon. I know. The ex still maybe nuts. I don't know.

[IAmFCA]

I am doing it! I am not calling him. Even though I know he would welcome it. I am doing this for me.

[IAmFCA]

43/32/18

 

I am trusting in this process. It is good for me. Whether I end up with m is secondary to doing what is good for me.

 

I miss him.

[js0905]

Woke up to a text message from him asking if I would like to go to a movie tonight... I wonder what he wants from me?

 

I DO wanna see a movie... But not with him right now. It would be way too weird. Plus I'm a sickie right now, so... I have not replied. Ugh.

 

 

Good morning MisSunny,

 

You and I have a lot of things in common....

Mine showed up at my job because he was in the "area" for work also on the day you typed this. It was Tuesday 12/3/13 and he insisted he never got my texts with those pic's attached. So I tested it again right there & then with him & he was not lying....LOL!!

 

Apparently my new phone which just had the last android upgrade & now runs on the kit kat platform now has a glitch.

I even googled it last night and tested it with some other people. A few of them just do not get any of my texts that have pics with them.

 

So strange, regardless he took me out to eat and we ended up together that night since I missed him so much.

He had a meeting Wednesday morning and then had to go back home (200 miles away).

 

I don't regret spending that time with him, he made me feel amazing, loved and wanted even if for a short time.

He has also stayed in touch and says he had missed me so much.

 

Don't know if this is going to go anywhere this time or not but I'm going to test it out.

 

Just wanted to share this with you. Did you end up seeing yours? are you feeling better?

 

Keep in touch and let me know. I will check on here every so often and I might be back to go NC again if I get fed up of/with things again.....LOL!!

[MisSunny]

Jeez. The funny thing is, I did go to the movie. It was a very tense and nervous day, and I'm not gonna lie, I had to excuse myself to the restroom once or twice for a brief cry because things were so strange... But the night topped off with him saying that he thinks he wants to give it another shot. How bizarre! So I'm not entirely sure what's going to happen, but I'm quietly optimistic. I'm in NC failure, that's for sure, but maybe it's not so bad. Hahaha.

[IAmFCA]

44/33/19

 

Just counting. He was not part of my day today.

[Scuza]

Wow, it's been a long time since I've been here. Almost a year and a half since I last posted. Life is crazy sometimes.

 

It's been almost two and a half years since the big breakup. I haven't talked to her in 2 years, and I haven't seen her in a year and a half. I sometimes still think of her, but it's not in a 'I want her back way', but more of a 'those were some good times' way. I don't want or need her back, and there's plenty of other girls around my university to keep me busy.

 

Since then, I have:

- Switched university programs to one that truly fulfills me, and I actually enjoy. I work harder than ever, but never have I been so happy in my program selection, despite the fact that many of the assignments and projects drive my friends and I insane.

- I've been to three national championships for running, and got a silver medal at one of them. Running and the running teams helped me find myself more than anything else did post-breakup.

- Learned more about what I've wanted in a significant other, and traits I look for in an individual.

- Learned more about myself, and become a more rounded person.

- Had an amazing time, even if I've been single for most of it. (Few on and off things here and there, nothing major or exclusive.)

 

I've been in the position many of you are currently in, and I just want to say that it does get better and easier with time. You were happy before them, and you will be happy after them. Treat it as a learning experience, rather than a painful experience.

 

Back to exam studying for me.

[bumblebee]

Day 46 of no contact, exactly 4 months since we broke up.

Doing significantly better. Another guy from college likes me and I might give him a chance, though we're extremely different.

Sometimes I delude myself by telling myself that what I actually want is my ex or someone super similar.

But what the hell, it's not like my ex will come running back anyway, it's been four months, so yay, dating.

[Jimboboy]

Well, I would like to post here.. My girlfriend broke up with me 2 months ago. After chasing her, and trying to do no contact for at least 3 times ( and failed it ) I decided to do it again.

 

This is day 3 and I am feeling terrible. I miss her so much, I started crying today.. Ugh I feel depressed.

[sadbutrue]

Day 18

 

I hate sundays

[IAmFCA]

45/34/20

 

I am through the part of my rhythm that makes me more sensitive, generally. I will make the 30 days. it's just not that big a deal.

[IAmFCA]

46/35/21

Counting

Can envision calling to get a drink after xmas, but I won't. I'm just not that interested.

[IAmFCA]

47/36/22

 

counting

confident

really? please.

[vi0let]

day 123 - passed the 4 month mark.

 

it's starting to feel a little ridiculous that i am STILL counting the days which can only be a good sign. i still haven't heard anything and at this rate, i am starting to accept that i probably won't for a very long time at least. still, i am grateful. if he had popped up early into the healing process it would have most definitely set me back. now, if he popped up i could probably be more or less objective about things. but i don't know ... it's pretty hard to guess accurately how i would react.

 

the memories are starting to feel like they occurred a long time ago now and i can't remember the sound of his voice clearly. i can just about remember his face from

memory, as ridiculous as that sounds. i am also glad that i deleted him off everything, even though i still do regret it at times. but i know that this is for the best and that the 'relationship' definitely wasn't a healthy one.

 

i am looking forward to meeting someone new and the single life is getting a little tedious now. i just hope i can keep up this attitude for the foreseeable future. i have no intentions of wishing him a happy birthday and breaking contact. i don't really see the point, even though i wish we were at least on good terms. i also wonder what he is up to. oh well, such is life, i don't really see myself breaking contact anytime soon.

[BigKK]

Wow! I'm Approaching 6 months?!

 

Thanks ENA, I sometimes look back to my early posts, I was so blinded with pain and so lost. I'd do anything to stop that feeling... It's interesting to now read new (and old) members going through similar things and remember that pain.

 

 

I am just waiting on my money from my ex and a few random things.

 

 

 

 

Hi Violet, I don't know how your break up went but good on you for holding out for 4 months. I get a little bit of a sense of still wanting reconciliation or am I misreading your post?

[vi0let]

Wow! I'm Approaching 6 months?!

 

Thanks ENA, I sometimes look back to my early posts, I was so blinded with pain and so lost. I'd do anything to stop that feeling... It's interesting to now read new (and old) members going through similar things and remember that pain.

 

 

I am just waiting on my money from my ex and a few random things.

 

 

 

 

Hi Violet, I don't know how your break up went but good on you for holding out for 4 months. I get a little bit of a sense of still wanting reconciliation or am I misreading your post?

 

Thank you BigKK; 6 months is incredible, well done!

 

Yeah i wouldn't mind it, but considering how the break up went with me being quite volatile and proceeding to take him off all my social media and blocking him mid-conversation, kind of says it all really. i can imagine that he wasn't particularly happy with my actions and a part of me isn't proud of that choice too now, but i'm learning to live with it. it's also probably the reason why i haven't heard anything from him and i'm accepting that now.

 

Then again at times, i still think what i did was kind of justified especially how the way he treated me towards the end of the relationship. i still find it hard to forgive him for his bad behaviour in my mind. i think this whole issue is the only thing really anchoring me to the past to be honest.