ddriver7

Well a lot of young teenagers hate school, i hated it really bad too. I had no friends, i was picked on, i hated school in general and messed everything up. I know it seems like you're trapped there, but you will soon get out of that. I know this is another cliche, but things get better. I thought a lot like you a while back. Now that i'm older and past all that, i think "man i was really dumb!!" I know you're feeling horrible and you think it'll never end - but it does. You'll look back on this one day and say to yourself the same thing i said. Life will not always be like it is in school. There are things you can do to help yourself at school and elsewhere. Do not end your life so early, there's so much you'd be missing out on. Don't do that to your family.

i notice eyes first, and/or a pretty face. Maybe its just me but i can't resist a girls eyes sometimes. Personality comes in too. I love a good sense of humor, someone i can joke and laugh with is important. Self-confindence. I like a girl who is up-front, one who lets me know if she likes me with flirting and things like that.

Okay, all of those are great options. I've decided i'll ask her out sometime soon. I'm getting that vibe from her best friend too. I know how to ask a girl out by now, but this is different because we're friends, AND she's got a boyfriend. Is there anything i should do differently? Anything to keep in mind? And lets say she says no because she's already involved. What happens with us when she breaks up with him? Thanks a lot guys.

I seem to have gotten out of my hard times, but i'm still having a problem. I can't seem to forget about this girl. (lets call her Amy) We met almost a year ago in class and hit it off. I'm not very experienced but i could tell she liked me. I liked her too, i had a crush on her before we met. She would flirt and we'd talk all the time. Long story short, she turned me down when i asked her out. I still don't know exactly why, but i have some ideas. But even after that, we'd still talk and we got closer than before. I still liked her a lot and didn't know why this was happening. After a couple of months Amy and i started to fight. It was mainly my fault - i wasn't aware of how i was treating her. I had to do something to let her know why i was being weird, so i told her about my feelings for her. I got a mixed reaction and she never really responded until during a fight we had. She said she used to like me until we had problems, and she's got a boyfriend. I know it was probably wrong to tell her how i feel, but i didn't know what else to do - our friendship was almost over, much less any chance of being together. After a lot of horrible arguments we made up. Now we're as good as when we first met! It was weird because she started being really nice to me out of nowhere for no reason, calling and writing emails. I still liked her very much so i asked her about being more than friends again. She gave another mixed response and said she "wants to be friends before going out", which i posted about a while ago. She's never mentioned it once since. Thats where we are now - i'm pretty sure she still has a boyfriend, but she still calls me and writes me. I don't understand that at all! We were never "friends" who do those things all the time so thats unusual of her. I posted this here because i still have really strong feelings for her and i don't know how to deal with that. Its not just a crush for me, i really do care about her and think about her all the time. For some reason she's very important to me and i don't want to let her go. I can't really describe how i feel about her. I'd almost think i love her, but we weren't close on that level. I always have hope that we'll go out. I know i should probably move on but i just can't. I don't know what to think because i always get the impression that she likes me. After everything she still calls me. A while back she would've been happy to have me out of her life for good, and when i finally was she came to me. I'm fine with being friends, but i'll always want to be more. Amy said we're friends but that doesn't mean a whole lot. I just want to be with her and it drives me crazy not knowing how we really are. I can't seem to get rid of these feelings i have for her and i can't stop thinking about it! I don't know how she feels because i'm affraid to bring it up again. What do i do? What do you think she's up to? I'd really appreciate anyone's adivce. Thanks.

Thats the thing - i was about to ask her out. I kept putting it off and the night before i was going to ask her, my friend tells me she just started seeing this guy! Do i have any chance here?

Well, its not that its a pattern for me. I liked this girl before she had a boyfriend. Same with another girl before her. I don't like it but by the time it happens i don't want to give up on her. I know there are single girls out there, but not at the moment for me. AzurePhoenix you make a good point. It is weird that she spends so much time talking to me when she has a boyfriend. Thats what leads me to think she likes me. Just today she left me a message online saying how she hasn't heard from me in a while (two days) and we'll talk later. I just don't understand her. I know i've got more to offer than her boyfriend so i'm not worried about that. I guess she feels committed to him so i'll have to wait like everyone said. Is there anything i can do to let her know i'd like to be more than friends without telling her "i like you" or things like that? I wanna give her a hint so that maybe she'll think about me more. I'd like to make some progress. Any ideas anyone?

Once again, i find myself interested in a girl who's got a boyfriend. I've known this girl for a while and we talk every night online. She knows i liked her in the past when we first met, but i don't know what she thinks now. I know she likes me but i don't know if its in "that way." Maybe she just sees me as a friend. Sometimes she acts like she likes me, but then it never goes anywhere. She's had a boyfriend for about 4 months or so. We get along so well and have more in common than most people do. I don't know much about how their relationship is doing. She mentioned they almost broke up but then the next day they were fine. So i'm confused about that. So I decided to just forget about it and be friends, but now i'm starting to like her again, a lot. I know we would have fun together. We talk for hours every night. We really are perfect for each other. I sense she thinks this too, but she's taken already. What should i do here? I'm affraid i'll lose any chance of being with her if i don't do something. And I don't want to make a mistake. She's a very nice, understanding person. She always says i can tell her anything and she's there for me. Very easy to talk to. She's really cool about anything. So what should i do?? Any help is greatly appreciated here.

Thanks, you both kinda helped. Maybe i do depend on friends to make me happy. Its just that i never had a ton of friends and i was always left out, even by those who are my friends. I just wanted to go out with this girl, i met her a year ago and thats how long its been going on with her. She (and another girl i liked later) became so important to me because i didn't have anyone, much less girls. And now that its apparently over, i feel i have nothing. It was such a big part of my life and now i'm alone. Alone while they're surrounded by close friends and their boyfriends. They say they're my friends and thats fine w/me, but i'll always want to be more than friends. And i don't think they really consider me a friend either. I don't meet too many girls so she is pretty significant to me. I know that sounds sad but its true. I don't know how everything got messed up all at once. The last week especially has been horrible and it doesn't seem to end. I tell myself things will get better but they never do, it just gets worse. When one thing goes wrong, it makes me feel even worse about everything else thats bad. I know its wrong depending on her to make me happy, but i honestly don't have anywhere else to go. And i don't know if or when i'll find anyone else. This is not the first attempt at a relationship that ended before it began. I don't think i've been closer to or liked any girl more than this one because it doesnt happen to me all the time. And now that its over i just feel terrible about myself and my life.

It seems all of a sudden that everything in my life has gone wrong. I have family troubles, we fight all the time. The one thing i care about is a girl (friend) who i thought liked me. I care about her and i like her so much. I'm finding out that she doesn't see me that way at all, nor do any other girls. That hurts me so bad for some reason. I feel alone. I know its wrong to "need" a girlfriend but i honestly need to have someone. I've been alone my whole life, never had many friends or girlfriends. I kept fooling myself in thinking she liked me when she already had a boyfriend, only kept me around to use me and lead me on. No one cares how i feel. My friends ignore me so they can be with their real friends. They say they're my friends but we never hang out and hardly talk. When i mention this to them they say i'm "taking things too personally" and stuff like that. All i wanted was to be with this girl and she doesn't really care much about me at all. I'd do anything to be with her and it kills me that it'll probably never happen. I'm starting to doubt that any girl wants to have anything to do with me. The thing is i'm not bad looking (or so i've been told) and i'm not totally inexperienced with these things. I just don't know what to do anymore. There's nothing i can do to make anything better because its all out of my hands. She means so much to me and i can't stand knowing we won't go out, and its probably my fault. I just needed to say some things, it didn't really come out too well so thanks for listening or replying.

Okay, here's what happened. She wrote me a friendly email and joked around saying she's in love with me and wants to talk badly, you know, she said she's joking. The part that bothers me is this - after she joked about that stuff, she said "we are friends of course!" I'm pretty sure that means we're just friends, but she said before how she wants to hang out as friends before dating. Is she just making it clear that currently we're just friends and we might date? Is she rejecting me as a boyfriend? What could she have meant by saying this now? Is this her way of taking things kinda slowly? I'm having a really really hard time reading and understanding this girl!

What if you two were having a good conversation, and at the end you say "can i call you sometime?" That way you aren't asking for her number directly. Maybe thats bad advice, i don't know i'm just throwing it out there.

I would think she likes me. Thats exactly how things got going with the girl i'm seeing now. But like others have said, it depends on a lot of things.

Nothing's happened yet. The first girl was out of town and she'll probably be back this weekend. I'm going to call her friend and ask her to hang out this week. Maybe she knows somethings going on between me and the first girl because she asked about us. So i don't know if she's interested in me that way for sure. I'll figure it out pretty soon. Its a really long story thats been going on for about a year now. Thanks

I'm sorry, i didn't mean first impressions as in i barely know them. I haven't seen either girl for about 2 months since school ended. So when we start talking again its like a first impression because its been so long. We used to see each other everyday all year. I know them both pretty well. Just wanted to clear that up.

I have other posts about these girls, but this subjects somewhat different. I met this girl at the start of last school year (about a year ago). Right when i saw her i fell for her. She showed an interest in me too, so we started to talk and hang out at school. Long story short, we started arguing about a lot of dumb little things. So when i asked her out, she said no because of that. Even after that, we were still "friends" but not really. A week later i met her friend. We hit it off right away. We have everything in common and get along so well. But by the time i got the nerve to ask her out it was too late - she had a new boyfriend. At this point i like her, but i still have feelings for the first girl. A while later, i hear from a friend that the first girl liked me before the arguing started. I never knew this, so i made a risky move and told her i like her. She said she didn't want to go out with me but wanted to be friends. But right after she started being really nice to me, kind of like she likes me. In an email i asked what she thought of being more than friends. She said "we should hang out as friends before we go out." I've heard a lot of opinions about what she said. So what does it mean? A few days ago, her friend calls me. She was really nice - my first impression was she's interested. She said that we should hang out and told me to email and call her. Does she sound interested in me? Is she expecting me to ask her out? What do i do?!! I like both girls a lot. Each of them have something the other doesn't. Both of them seem to like me, but i can't tell from what they've said to me. If i stay with the first girl, maybe she just wants to be friends and i'll lose a chance with her friend. If i go out with her friend, i may lose the girl i had feelings for all along. And one of them could tell the other that she's going out with me. I don't want to lose either of them for now, nor do i want to hurt anyone. I don't even know for sure if they both like me or not. I'm only going on my first impressions on how they've been acting around me, plus our past. I'm really confused and don't have a clue about what to do. I know its a confusing post but this is really hard for me and i wouldn't mind hearing someone's advice. I know i'll figure this out as i talk to both of them, but right now i'd like a better view on it. Thanks a bunch

acutally i agree with both of you. My problem is, i don't want to wait for her to be ready when i could be with her friend who may want to start dating right away. I like both girls a lot. Its really hard for me to figure things out because so many things come in to play. I could end up hurting one of them and lose them both. I have no idea what she meant by "friends before we go out." And i won't be able to talk to her for a few days. To me, i thought it was really simple. I thought it meant she wants to get re-aquainted first because we had problems in the past. But i guess there's a lot of different ways to look at this.

I've been in the same situtaion too. We weren't even dating yet, but we always did things to push each others buttons and argued all the time. odysseus77 - you put it best man! Anyway, although the others probably have better advice i'd say you should communicate w/ each other more. Find out where both of you are coming from. And figure out why exactly you two argue. Maybe you can work together to stop it. I was lucky and now the girl wants a relationship. What i'm saying is i think its possible to get past this, but then again everyone's situation is different. Good luck!

No problem DopeStar. Now that i think about it that probably wasn't the best advice for his situation. And it might be why my relationship didn't work out! Sorry davidguy65!! I take back what i said. I totally agree with ECD. He explained it perfectly. It seems hard to believe girls can be that way, but a lot of times they can be.

Thanks. I never looked at it that way. How should i ask her out? I mean, what do i say to let her know its a date and not "hanging out as friends?"

We weren't really friends before. Well, we were friends in a way, but there was always an attraction between us. The thing is I know she liked me before we had our problems - she told me. Now i don't know what to think. I guess i'll have to wait. Its a really messed up situation because i also like her friend. And since we're not dating i don't think its wrong if i date her friend.

I was in the same situation! Basically no one can tell you what to say to her. I had something planned too, but i said something totally different to her when the time came. Tell her how you feel. Be honest to her. Its kind of a thing you have to think of on your own. If you're asking her out then do just that.

I met this girl a while ago. We were both interested in each other at first but she started dating someone else. Now i think they're broken up. We always got along and flirted a lot. I heard from a friend she likes me but i don't know for sure. She called me yesterday out of nowhere and said we should hang out, she also told me to write her an email and to call her soon. My problem is I can never tell if a girl's just being a friend when she does stuff like this. Is there anyway to tell? Any signs? And lets say we do start hanging out. At what point do i know if there's something more between us or if we're just friends?

I wasn't expecting these types of responses! I'm confused. If a girl says "I think we should be friends BEFORE going out" isn't she saying just that? I thought she was implying that she does want to go out but she wants to start over as friends to see how it goes. I guess there's not just one way of looking at this. I never thought of it the way you guys put it and i'll keep your advice in mind. Would it be okay to date someone else during all of this? I think this other girl (her friend) might wanna go out with me but i'm not sure yet. What do you think?

This girl and I have always liked each other but we started having arguments a lot, so when i asked her out she said no. I told her i want to be friends and she seemed fine with that. Recently, out of nowhere she started being really nice and we started getting along again. I still really like her, so I decided to make a move. I wrote her an email saying i want to be more than friends and asked her out. I was expecting to be rejected by her for the 4th time, but no! She wrote back saying "... i think we should hang out as friends before going out" What do i make of this? Is this a good sign? Is she implying that we probably will go out? I just wanted someone else's take on it. I have no problem being friends first and i think its the better thing to do. I'm just worried we won't go out. I can be paranoid about these things. What do you think?

Maybe this was posted before, but do girls prefer when a guy is neatly trimmed and shaved all over? Does it matter to girls when they're giving oral to a guy or having sex? I know its probably a personal preference, but i'm just curious.