DaniChris

Wow, I know what you are going through and I sympathize so much. Oh my God, the loneliness can be incredible. Coming here and reading and posting replies to other people who are in the same boat has helped me. If there are any hobbies you like - bowling league, singles dances, church activities, learn to country line dance - whatever - those are just a couple I can think of at the moment - do them. And know that you can come here, too, when you need to talk or are feeling really lonely.

Marion, you will live with the consequences of this forever. In my honest opinion, if there is any way in the world the two of you can work things out, go to therapy, whatever, I would do it. The life of a single mother is very, very difficult. I have three children and have been divorced seven years. I cannot tell you the heartache that continues to occur long afterwards. What if you eventually meet someone else and he has children and the two of you fall in love? What if that relationship ends too, for some unforeseeable reason, and here you are having to deal with the broken hearts of so many people. If your husband is abusive, by all means you must leave, but if there is any hope, any love left, imho, try to work it out. Leaving is not a magic bullet and the repercussions for you and your children are far-reaching and long-lasting. I have left an abusive man, tried to start a life with three children, been in new relationships and, let me tell you, when those relationships end, when the children have to change schools because your fiancee broke up with you out of the blue or you re-marry and have spent years with the new husband's children - the heartache is unbelievable. So many more broken relationships and your children hurting through it all.

You are so young, but you absolutely will get through this. I am 34 and going through the worst heartache of my life, but I remember being 15 and having my b/f of three years break up with me. Oh, the pain. I pretended it hadn't happened just to get through it. Every time we open our hearts and love someone we risk having our heart broken. Just cope the best you can and give yourself alot of time to heal. It make take a month, even longer. 15 was the first time I had my heart broken, and now I am working on my fourth heartbreak, this one being far worse than anything I've ever experienced. Just don't close your heart. Hopefully you will never go through this again, but if you love it's a chance you take. I think it's worth it but I am trying to convince myself of that now. The pain is so fresh.

Thank you because I am feeling so drained from having so many different emotions and am so sad that I feel like I wish I were dead. No, I can't do that because I have three children, but the pain is nearly unbearable. I need to hear the stories about time healing so badly. It seems like I will drown in all this, so thank you for sharing.

I am going through the same thing, terrible mood swings, now panic attacks and fear, anger, hopelessness, not wanting to live, you name it. People are telling me it's normal. We have had the rug pulled out from under us, and maybe need to be really, really gently with ourselves and give ourselves time and patience. We will get through it eventually. I hear there is light at the end of the tunnel, but it takes awhile to reach that point. Take care of yourself.

I don't think there is any miracle strategy. I have to still live in the same home with my ex until we can both find separate places. It feels like my heart will rip each time I drive up to the house and every time I see him I want to die. I wish so badly that he would change his mind. It is really, really hard to see the person who caused you so much pain because it opens up the wound all over again. If you can change jobs somehow, that would probably help. If nothing else, just try to cope, get through it and accept what you are feeling even though it stinks.

You are exactly where I am now. I moved in with the absolute love of my life, took my 3 children out of their schools and home to do it, and on Mother's Day after only 3 months of liuving together, he told me that he must leave. We got along perfectly, were very, very happy, and what happened? I don't understand. I think I will never again meet anyone as wonderful and as good of a person as him. We were so, so good together. I think you are feeling normal. Just feel what you feel, I guess, and I am told this will pass in time. I feel a little better, myself, sharing with others and grieving with others who are going through the same thing and feeling the same things. Maybe that will also continue to help you. From what I understand, we have a long way to go in healing our hearts. We're going to have to accept being miserable for awhile.

Hi - Sincerely, as a woman, every time I have ever said, "Your're my best friend, that is all", I meant it. There was not enough interest/chemistry/attraction from my end, even though I genuinely liked the other person. Sometimes you enjoy the attention from a man and you keep the relationship going because you're lonely, but you know deep in your heart that he is not "the one". I would not keep pursuing her and declaring your feelings. Actually, I would take a huge step back from the relationship. Online relationships - I did some online dating and met the most wonderful man in the world a year ago. Unfortunately, this man decided ultimately, two months after I moved my children and myself to be with him, that he was unable to devote the attention he wanted to his own 4 children while working so much to try and maintain our place too, plus child support. It is the greatest tragedy of my life, truly, because we were absolutely wonderful together. But anyway, good relationships can and do develop. Mine ended in heartache, unfortunately, but I would not write off online relationships at all. I might consider moving your attentions in another direction, though. Maybe give her some time, but often the "friend" feeling is permanent, I'm sorry to say.