I got an std from my boyfriend and he denies sleeping with anyone else

I recently went to the doctor a little over a week ago. I thought I had a bladder infection or uti. I get my results back and low and behold the doctor tells me I have trich! Wth is that? After I was informed about it, it didn't hit me until I got home. My boyfriend slept with someone else!! We've been together for 5 years haven't had sex with anyone else on my end. So I tell him and he won't admit to it. He got tested as well results were positive! He had been itching down there for quite some time and I thought nothing of it...thought well men get itchy down there just like women do. I've been so angry. I feel alone. Our relationship is on the verge of ending either way. I am feeling very sad and we have children involved. I plan on leaving him when I have the funds to do so. I've been so angry that I can't even think. We were going to counseling and well I brought it up and he still denied sleeping with anyone else!! I don't understand. I get that he would not want to hurt my feelings. We are not children. I just wish he would tell the damn truth! I think I'm more upset that he is still lying to me. It doesn't help that my friends can't relate. My friends are all married never had anything like this happen. So now I feel worse because I'm the lucky one dealing with relationship problems. I don't know how to get him to confess. Anyone have any suggestions?

He doesn't have to confess. You have scientific evidence that he cheated. Better to end it now.

If he didn't want to hurt you, they he wouldn't have betrayed you and had unprotected sex. This has nothing to do with not wanting to hurt you. If he had an ounce of decency, he would fess up.

Stop pursuing this. Just get out!

Can't you move in with family or friends?

One question you didn't go to the gyno anytime before you got this? I looked it up I'm sure you have. Had no idea what it was. Only instances with out sex was getting it from the gyno.

Unfortunately he won't admit to it. What does the counselor say about this?

I get my results back and low and behold the doctor tells me I have trich! He got tested as well results were positive! We were going to counseling and well I brought it up and he still denied sleeping with anyone else!

One question you didn't go to the gyno anytime before you got this? I looked it up I'm sure you have. Had no idea what it was. Only instances with out sex was getting it from the gyno.

Huh? Please post your evidence. I didn't see anything.

Did her bf go to a Gyno? He had the symptoms first.

He will deny it to his grave, but it doesn't matter because as the other posters have mentioned, you have scientific proof.

You need to leave now and not wait until you have "the funds to do so," it's more complicated since there are children involved but you need to start making your escape plan now, and exit sooner rather than later. Find some family or friends to stay with that will also accept the kids. Get the heck out of there.

Huh? Please post your evidence. I didn't see anything.

 

Did her bf go to a Gyno? He had the symptoms first.

I think they are saying that she herself may have caught it from her gyno... seems far-fetched lol

I think they are saying that she herself may have caught it from her gyno... seems far-fetched lol

I understood what he was saying. I wanted him to forward the link re. this 'epidemic.' It's even more silly, as the bf has been symptomatic for some time.

I'm sorry this is happening to you. My only advice is to let it go and move on. You already have evidence and proof that he cheated, you can't force him to confess. If he still hasn't done so by now, I doubt he ever will. If he wanted you to know, he would have confessed a long time ago, so you could have gotten checked out earlier. So your only closure is within yourself, your boyfriend is hopeless, no point in wasting anymore time with him. Besides, what difference does it make if he does confess? The damage has already been done. If he's capable of hurting and doing this to you, I'm afraid to know what else he's capable of?

If it was me, and I truly love and care for someone, I would have confessed right after I cheated, just so the person could get a check up. Part of caring and loving someone is caring for their well being. I'd say if you could go a family member or a friend's place, you should really do it. Not good to be in the same home as him right now.

I just used Google I looked up (anyway to get trich without sex) it said there have been some cases of a D and C procedure or during pregnancy.

I had a similar issue I got epiditimus about a decade ago. I was with the same person 8 years. I know I only had sex with her. I seriously doubt she had sex with anyone. Could I be 100% positive no, no 1 can. But there was alot more cases and easier cases of getting epiditimus then trich. Plus you said he was itching away before you. I'd start planning a way out ASAP

I've been there, but seriously what more proof do you need? Do you have to catch him in the act or what, because you know those things don't just "happen." STDs don't get caught from someone sneezing on you or from a toilet seat or anything else.

Stop stalling the inevitable and just go already. Doesn't matter how it happened, the guy gambled with your very life and health. What if that STD had been one of the incurable fatal ones? Staying with him is like keeping a loaded weapon with the safety off out and letting him use it to crack nuts and shoot randomly at butterflies. Sure maybe a bullet will never hit you, but I wouldn't be holding my breath on that one.

Also, you caught it from your gyno isn't going to happen unless you had sex with the gynecologist. Come on. That falls into the whole aspirin and coke to keep from getting pregnant mythology.

I went to urgent care and I did not go to my on/gyn. But the office uses disposable tools so I'm sure I did not get it from the office. I thank you all for your insight. I needed some perspectives and I definitely got that from each of you. My friends told me they didn't know what to say since they weren't in my situation. I have a plan wish me luck

What is your plan? You're in a tough spot. What are you going to do?

I have a plan wish me luck

Will be contacting family. I have a sister who is willing to help. Going to tell my boyfriend my evidence, explain I cannot continue to remain in the relationship, be civil, work out a plan for visitation, and move on

He may very well be telling the truth.

Years ago I got trich from a hot tub. I was in between partners and had been tested clean. So I know it was from the hot tub.

The other thing that confirmed it was that my friend's husband got trichomoniasis and then my friend got it (it was their hot tub) and so she accused me of having an affair with him ( I was not, but I think he was having an affair with someone).

My doctor thought I was lying about no partner and of course my friend thought I was lying. Years later a doctor confirmed that you could get something like that from an unmaintained hot tub (or perhaps an unclean surfave at the gym?) They had just not done any research before then.

The other thing is that men can actually be a carrier for trich in that they may have it but they don't have symptoms - for weeks, months, or even years. But if their immunities go down, then it may take off, and then it infects you.

So he may be telling the truth.

He may very well be telling the truth.

Years ago I got trich from a hot tub. I was in between partners and had been tested clean. So I know it was from the hot tub.

 

The other thing that confirmed it was that my friend's husband got trichomoniasis and then my friend got it (it was their hot tub) and so she accused me of having an affair with him ( I was not, but I think he was having an affair with someone).

 

My doctor thought I was lying about no partner and of course my friend thought I was lying. Years later a doctor confirmed that you could get something like that from an unmaintained hot tub (or perhaps an unclean surfave at the gym?) They had just not done any research before then.

 

The other thing is that men can actually be a carrier for trich in that they may have it but they don't have symptoms - for weeks, months, or even years. But if their immunities go down, then it may take off, and then it infects you.

 

So he may be telling the truth.

I wish there was more research done. But, I haven't been in any hot tubs. I go to the gym but do not use showers there and I confirmed with my doctor that this is a sexually transmission infection. She did state the parasite can lay dormant, but in my most recent urine sample which was two months ago due to a bladder infection, it would have shown up. So my doctor states the infection occurred recently. I'm waiting to confirm if there is information about how long it can lay dormant, but at this point I have made my decision to leave. Even after I told my boyfriend that I got this infection he went on his own to get treated. From random posts I've seen in other websites the couples actually work together to figure it out and instead of telling me his results he first told me he tested positive, now he's saying he didn't and that I'm the one at fault. I've never had this before! I get my regular Pap smears and check ups yearly because I am at risk for cervical cancer. So now this infection just increased my chances. Our relationship was on the verge of ending either way.

Typical cheating behavior, blame the victim