Popular Post wishingonastar Posted March 25, 2009 Popular Post Share Posted March 25, 2009 I look on this forum a lot to see if there are any new stories about people getting back together with their ex's. I do it just so that I can have some hope, and I really hope someday I can post my story on here to give others confidence that having hope pays off. In the meantime, I am going to make a list of actual stories of people I know that broke up and got back together. Please post your stories here too and we can put a little bit of cheer into this forum. 1. My friend was dumped by his girlfriend of 4 years. They were broken up for a year and a half and he tried everything to get her back. One day he was with his friend talking about her and she called him right then to talk about something trivial, and he went over to her house. They got back together and now they are engaged. 2. My friend's sister and her husband broke up for four years and now they are married with 3 kids. 3. My friend broke up with her high school sweetheart when we were 19 and they got back together a few years later and have been together ever since. 4. My other friend broke up with her high school sweetheart when she was a sophomore in college and they just got back together and now they live together. 5. A friend of my ex's was so sad about a girl forever, talked about her all the time when we were out at the clubs, couldn't believe they broke up, etc....now they have been back together for over a year. 6. My friend and her boyfriend dated for a few years, broke up for 9 months, now they are engaged. She says their relationship is better than ever now they are back together. 7. My friend was hung up on this guy forever, he would go back and forth and never commit, now they are living together and she is going to have a baby. They are really happy and in the end it worked out great. That is just some of the stories I know off the top of my head. Please post any stories of reconciliation that you know of so that we can have some cheer in this forum. 4 1 Link to comment
dangletsbang Posted March 25, 2009 Share Posted March 25, 2009 My mom and dad were seperated when I was young [around two] for over a year..they got back together and just recently had their 23rd anniversary. 1 Link to comment
Jonboy582 Posted March 25, 2009 Share Posted March 25, 2009 My sister and her husband broke up for about a year before they got married. Now they have 2 kids and married for 11 years. Although they are now getting divorced, but I think the message is still the same lol. 1 Link to comment
EQD Posted March 25, 2009 Share Posted March 25, 2009 not all get togethers end in success. my and an ex dated for 6 months in high school, 3 years later we got back together for a year and a half and it was the most decietful and immature relationship i have ever had the displeasure of being in. 1 Link to comment
SapphireNoir10 Posted March 25, 2009 Share Posted March 25, 2009 My mum and dad broke up briefly just before they got married and they are very happy togehter now. But thats so rare. Most break ups end in...break ups or a miserable relationship in my experience. Link to comment
IMAbadman Posted March 25, 2009 Share Posted March 25, 2009 I got back together with my EX. I still love her the same. Link to comment
jpete Posted March 25, 2009 Share Posted March 25, 2009 Why are some people posting negative comments here, this thread is about success stories, sure we all know its a possibility that we may not get back together but there are hundreds of other threads in this forum for that, so post those comments in that one 1 Link to comment
justletgo07 Posted March 25, 2009 Share Posted March 25, 2009 Why are some people posting negative comments here, this thread is about success stories, sure we all know its a possibility that we may not get back together but there are hundreds of other threads in this forum for that, so post those comments in that one Having hope is good, but so is being realistic. I think its good to mix some reality in with the hope. People spend months holding onto hope because they are too afraid to face the reality that their relationship is over. Threads like this are great, no doubt, but I think they sometimes do a disservice, especially to the newbies. 2 Link to comment
SapphireNoir10 Posted March 25, 2009 Share Posted March 25, 2009 I was merely sharing both sides of the spectrum. Sometimes it works out great sometimes it doesnt. I dont think its fair to give people unrealistic expectations. 2 Link to comment
Growl1971 Posted March 25, 2009 Share Posted March 25, 2009 i agree... relationships end, it's a part of life. you can't tie all the reasons up and package it with a nice bow...it's not that easy. if you have faith, some will say...'what's meant to be will happen in the end'....I personally do believe this. But, in the meantime, as much as it hurts, you need to let go. This is not the case with all, because their all individual cases, but, I'd lean toward 'most'. I hate it too...believe me!!!! Link to comment
thejigsup Posted March 25, 2009 Share Posted March 25, 2009 I've only gone back with two men in my lifetime. BIG MISTAKES! I will never go back again. If you are looking for fairy tales, read a book. People break up because the relationship is not working on some level. That never changes. You can get back together, but it is still not a healthy relationship most of the tme. Link to comment
Brownstone322 Posted March 25, 2009 Share Posted March 25, 2009 cant control who posts what. Yup, but you'd think they'd have enough sense to understand the context. Anyway, I've gotten back together with all of my exes in one way or another, and we always eventually split amicably. Never once did it end "forever on the spot." A friend of mine broke up with his long-time girlfriend, and they were apart for about three years. Now they're married with two daughters. Link to comment
Fionnuala Posted March 25, 2009 Share Posted March 25, 2009 People break up because the relationship is not working on some level. That never changes. You can get back together, but it is still not a healthy relationship most of the tme. This is obviously not true. Of course it changes sometimes, otherwise there wouldn't be any success stories. Just because you've had bad experiences getting back together doesn't mean that "most" don't work or are unhealthy. I've seen just as many reconciliations work out for the better as I have ones that end up falling apart again because they were just as unhealthy as the first time around. Granted, I am much younger than you are, but I know people of all ages who have had this happen in their lives. It all has to do with the circumstances, and whether the reasons for the break up can and have been addressed and fixed. I understand that people want to make sure we're being realistic and not giving false hope, but there's a difference between realism and straight up negativity and pessimism. Yes, most people who break up stay broken up, but successful reconciliations are not that uncommon and it's ridiculous and insulting to act as if anyone who thinks this could happen is living in a fantasy world. Anyway, a few stories I know: 1. One of my closest friends was on and off with her fiancee for two or three years, mostly due to her fear of commitment and abandonment. She cheated on him several times, and they broke up several times. Despite all this, her boyfriend always stuck by her side (sometimes just as a friend) and in the past couple of years she's finally started to work through her issues and stop running from the relationship. They've been going strong again for about a year and a half now and are getting married in August. They're happier now than I've ever seen them, and I'd be very surprised if it doesn't work out for them. 2. Another friend of mine had a boyfriend in college whom she was very close to and loved very much. I'm not sure why they broke up, but they did, and remained friends (though not super close). She's moved to a different state several years later and they weren't in contact as much. I think they ended up finding each other on Facebook or something and when he came to our state, they met up and ended up getting back together. He still lived in their homestate, so they were long distance for a while, but she moved back a few months ago and I wouldn't be surprised if they end up married. 3. I don't know the details of the situation, but I had a friend in college who broke up with her boyfriend, they remained friends with benefits for a while, then ended up getting back together a few months later. That was almost two years ago and they're still together and very happy. 4. Another one I don't really know the details about, but there was a friend I worked with who broke up with her boyfriend for a year, they got back together and have now been together for several more years, are about to have a baby, and also about to get married. 5. My grandma and grandpa were high school sweethearts, they broke up once in high school, but got back together and ended up married when they were still teenagers. They were married for almost 20 years, when he died. Just a few I can think of off the top of my head. I think the important thing to remember is that while reconciliations do happen, you can't count on them happening. There isn't a secret formula that can guarantee it'll happen and work out, so you pretty much just have to prepare yourself for the worst and make your life the best it can be on your own, because if you sit around waiting for it, it probably won't happen and your life will have passed you by in the mean time. 1 Link to comment
wishingonastar Posted March 25, 2009 Author Share Posted March 25, 2009 It's ok, post whatever you want. It doesn't change the fact that people get back together all the time and it works out. A lot of people have bad experiences with getting back together with an ex, but that doesn't mean others will too. If you are meant to be together you will find each other again. The title of this forum is "getting back together" and so I think it's nice to share some stories of people actually getting back together. Link to comment
wishingonastar Posted March 25, 2009 Author Share Posted March 25, 2009 I also found this website FILLED with stories of people getting back together with their lost loves: link removed Don't let the haters get you down! If you are meant to be together it will happen, and no one can take away your hope!!! Link to comment
IMAbadman Posted March 25, 2009 Share Posted March 25, 2009 I've only gone back with two men in my lifetime. BIG MISTAKES! I will never go back again. If you are looking for fairy tales, read a book. People break up because the relationship is not working on some level. That never changes. You can get back together, but it is still not a healthy relationship most of the tme. No offense but I detect a bit of cynic even scornful. Couple bad break-ups? Link to comment
JohnGalt Posted March 25, 2009 Share Posted March 25, 2009 Reconciliations happen all the time. It isn't rare at all. And yes, sometimes people break up again even after they reconcile...but what is success? If you don't last forever, then you're going to break up sometime. Link to comment
Rob1000 Posted March 25, 2009 Share Posted March 25, 2009 I got back together with my ex about 3 years ago. My posts about it should still be on here. Link to comment
justmyview Posted March 25, 2009 Share Posted March 25, 2009 I always chuckle to myself when the inevitable "not all break-ups lead to reconciliations" and "I went back to an ex - what a waste of time" type comments pop up in a thread designed to be optimistic. As someone pointed out, there are a wealth of threads which demonstrate those points of view specifically. I think it's great to have one which shows they DO happen. Also, the old, unsubstantiated statistic gets trotted out about how 'rare' reconciliations are. Citing survey results would be really helpful, I think. I've no proof either way. What I would say, however, is that a reconciliation appears more likely to be effective (from the anecdotal evidence) IF a significant period of NC has been adhered to - a year or more. I would hazard a guess that the longer the period of NC, the more successful the reconciliation. I'm open to challenges on that view 1 Link to comment
kitchentable Posted March 25, 2009 Share Posted March 25, 2009 There is a lot of bitter advice offered on these boards. As with life, people need to take others' opinions with a grain of salt and make up their own mind. I understand it can be unwise to give people false hope but I think it is equally unwise to swear against reconciliation. Each relationship is different. Every person is different. If you want to hold on to the hope that you and your ex will reunite that's your choice and you will either live with the consequences or end up getting what you want. The most practical advice (remember, grain of salt) that I can offer is to live for you. Try to find happiness no matter your future. That's what I'm trying to do anyway. 2 Link to comment
justmyview Posted March 25, 2009 Share Posted March 25, 2009 Yup, but you'd think they'd have enough sense to understand the context. Anyway, I've gotten back together with all of my exes in one way or another, and we always eventually split amicably. Never once did it end "forever on the spot." Funnily enough, all my exs (apart from this last one) have come back to me. But by then, it was too late. I had moved on. Link to comment
JohnGalt Posted March 25, 2009 Share Posted March 25, 2009 I've only gone back with two men in my lifetime. BIG MISTAKES! I will never go back again. If you are looking for fairy tales, read a book. People break up because the relationship is not working on some level. That never changes. You can get back together, but it is still not a healthy relationship most of the tme. So says the woman who runs at the first sign of commitment. Perhaps if you didn't prefer your career to love, things would be different. Link to comment
nauum Posted March 25, 2009 Share Posted March 25, 2009 It really almost sounds like to me that couples go through a period (especially guys) before getting serious and/or marrying where they need to re-evaluate the relationship and take a break. I think John Gray mentions this too happening... around 1 year into a relationship. My sister and her husband are HAPPILY married for 4 years and he stuck by her through her committment stuff-she broke up with him twice...but it's good now Link to comment
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