saintboon Posted June 24, 2008 Share Posted June 24, 2008 Are we counting oral sex? If not, at age 21 - 6 If so - around 30 Link to comment
qwerty1984 Posted July 3, 2008 Share Posted July 3, 2008 i'm 23 and i've had 7.... first at 16, 3 one night stands... Link to comment
hear_her_roar Posted March 16, 2009 Share Posted March 16, 2009 Just under twenty, and I've only slept with one person, but have fooled around with three. However from what I've gathered, my number is far lower than most girls my age, hahaha. Link to comment
EQD Posted March 18, 2009 Share Posted March 18, 2009 16-1 17-3 18-5 19-cant recall 21& current-11 lol Link to comment
ghost69 Posted March 18, 2009 Share Posted March 18, 2009 i think mine at least doubled or tripled after 21/22. i had a gf for 4.5 years before that so i was a bit behind. now, i'm pretty sure i'm in the triple digits. *slaps forehead* Link to comment
Fionnuala Posted March 18, 2009 Share Posted March 18, 2009 Wow. I'm surprised by how high most people's numbers are. I guess I shouldn't be, but I just can't even imagine sleeping with that many people. Guess I'm a weirdo! I'm 23 and I've only slept with one person, hoping I don't have more than one more before I get married. Link to comment
ghost69 Posted March 18, 2009 Share Posted March 18, 2009 Wow. I'm surprised by how high most people's numbers are. I guess I shouldn't be, but I just can't even imagine sleeping with that many people. Guess I'm a weirdo! I'm 23 and I've only slept with one person, hoping I don't have more than one more before I get married. where are you from may i ask? i know values differ with age, sex, religion, culture, and of course personal values. Link to comment
Fionnuala Posted March 18, 2009 Share Posted March 18, 2009 where are you from may i ask? i know values differ with age, sex, religion, culture, and of course personal values. I'm from the US, grew up in California and Michigan. I grew up in moderately sized cities, but I did grow up in a Christian family, so that influences my outlook. I originally wanted to wait until I was married, but that didn't happen. Even though I'm not as set on waiting until marriage anymore, I can't imagine having partners in the double and triple digits. I don't think I could ever even be comfortable enough with that many people to have sex with them. I don't mean this to come off as judgmental or anything, I know not everyone shares my viewpoint and I have no issue with that, I just can't even fathom doing that. Link to comment
dragon lady Posted March 18, 2009 Share Posted March 18, 2009 Oh god, I'm still on the same number as I was last June. No action for me since September. I hate my life. Link to comment
EQD Posted March 18, 2009 Share Posted March 18, 2009 I'm from the US, grew up in California and Michigan. I grew up in moderately sized cities, but I did grow up in a Christian family, so that influences my outlook. I originally wanted to wait until I was married, but that didn't happen. Even though I'm not as set on waiting until marriage anymore, I can't imagine having partners in the double and triple digits. I don't think I could ever even be comfortable enough with that many people to have sex with them. I don't mean this to come off as judgmental or anything, I know not everyone shares my viewpoint and I have no issue with that, I just can't even fathom doing that. well if it makes any difference you are actually a minority as far as figures go. its somewhat rare to meet someone who is 23 and only slept with one person. not downgrading, just giving food for thought. i never thought i'd sleep with as many people as i have. but crap happens. *shrug* lol Link to comment
ghost69 Posted March 18, 2009 Share Posted March 18, 2009 I'm from the US, grew up in California and Michigan. I grew up in moderately sized cities, but I did grow up in a Christian family, so that influences my outlook. I originally wanted to wait until I was married, but that didn't happen. Even though I'm not as set on waiting until marriage anymore, I can't imagine having partners in the double and triple digits. I don't think I could ever even be comfortable enough with that many people to have sex with them. I don't mean this to come off as judgmental or anything, I know not everyone shares my viewpoint and I have no issue with that, I just can't even fathom doing that. i didn't plan on sleeping with as many girls as i had, but i was in the club scene for a while back in the day. most girls i just blew off because i wanted no relationship and they didn't either. what a stupid time it was for me, but it makes me who i am today. AND it's my past, so... in actuality, if you compound my numbers over time, it's not that many. but i'm glad you don't judge and you realize it's just not your thing. Link to comment
Fionnuala Posted March 18, 2009 Share Posted March 18, 2009 well if it makes any difference you are actually a minority as far as figures go. its somewhat rare to meet someone who is 23 and only slept with one person. not downgrading, just giving food for thought. i never thought i'd sleep with as many people as i have. but crap happens. *shrug* lol It doesn't make a difference, I know I'm in the minority. I just don't really understand why. I don't really understand why anyone would want to sleep with 10+ people. I get having maybe up to like 5, but I'm also not really interested in having sex outside of a relationship, so unless I become a serial monogamist, it's unlikely my number will get that high. But I actually think not having slept with a ton of people is more common than some people think. I know a lot of people my age who have only slept with a few people, and most of them don't come from religious backgrounds like I do or necessarily share my exact values. Not everyone is into having sex with lots of people. I'd be interested to see actual research on this topic, actually. It's hard to say what's "common" based on personal experiences or even responses in an internet forum. Of course, a couple of years ago, I would have said that I'd never have sex before I was married, and that turned out not to be true, so maybe in a few years I'll be back here saying I've had sex with 20 guys in the meantime. Link to comment
ghost69 Posted March 18, 2009 Share Posted March 18, 2009 i'm not sure actual research could pinpoint a gene, a trait, a theory, or anything that proves why you slept with less than someone else did. it was your choice. of course you don't understand it. just like i do not understand how someone could buy a $1.5 million car without driving it first. sex is part of being compatible. what happens if you are with someone, get married and it's terrible? Link to comment
Fionnuala Posted March 18, 2009 Share Posted March 18, 2009 i'm not sure actual research could pinpoint a gene, a trait, a theory, or anything that proves why you slept with less than someone else did. it was your choice. of course you don't understand it. just like i do not understand how someone could buy a $1.5 million car without driving it first. No, I don't mean research pointing to why people make the choice, I mean research showing what the average number actually is. I understand that people make their choices based on their upbringing, values, culture, outside influences, etc and that this is different for everyone. I wasn't suggesting that there was some specific trait that causes people to be one way or the other. And I understand plenty of things that aren't choices I would make, this just isn't one of them. Link to comment
ghost69 Posted March 18, 2009 Share Posted March 18, 2009 No, I don't mean research pointing to why people make the choice, I mean research showing what the average number actually is. I understand that people make their choices based on their upbringing, values, culture, outside influences, etc and that this is different for everyone. I wasn't suggesting that there was some specific trait that causes people to be one way or the other. And I understand plenty of things that aren't choices I would make, this just isn't one of them. you said research so..but, the research might not be accurate. i stopped counting after so long. i have an idea what the # is, but i couldn't be certain. not that it matters as it was my past. also, wouldn't you like to go into marriage knowing you can satisfy your partner? sure, communication must occur, but there is probably only so much you can know at that point. it could also be that you are in a less social environment than people that hook up more. that can cause a decrease in numbers. Link to comment
Fionnuala Posted March 18, 2009 Share Posted March 18, 2009 you said research so..but, the research might not be accurate. i stopped counting after so long. i have an idea what the # is, but i couldn't be certain. not that it matters as it was my past. also, wouldn't you like to go into marriage knowing you can satisfy your partner? sure, communication must occur, but there is probably only so much you can know at that point. it could also be that you are in a less social environment than people that hook up more. that can cause a decrease in numbers. Well, I found an article from MSNBC from a couple of years ago that says the average number for men is 7 and 4 for women: link removed You're right, it's hard to say how accurate any research on this topic might be. But something like this seems more reliable to me that asking people on an internet forum or saying, "most people I know do such and such." It's not exactly a random sampling. I don't know what having sex with multiple partners has to do with whether or not I'll be able to satisfy whomever I marry? I mean, when I had sex with my ex, of course I was nervous at first that I didn't know what to do, wouldn't be good at it, etc., but it just took practice and communication to find out what worked for us. It's not really that difficult. Yes, there's only so much you can know without actually having sex, but when you're getting married, you have a lifetime to figure it all out together. I'm not really worried about it. I don't know that I'm in a "less social" environment than people who hook up more, maybe just a different kind of social environment. I don't generally spend tons of time in social situations where alcohol is involved, which seems to be a key factor in a lot of random hook ups, so that might be something to do with it. I mean, I go to parties and bars, but generally not with the intention of getting smashed. Link to comment
EQD Posted March 19, 2009 Share Posted March 19, 2009 everyone defines 'a ton of people' differently. since 'a ton' is an opinion its an incredible variable that cannot be accurately measured. you never know where life can take you. like i said before, i never knew where i would be at now when i first started having sex. No one says after their first time 'i bet i'll be up to 15 people in two years or six years' or whatever. there are things that i cant get my head around that people do everyday, so i understand how you feel about this issue. all i can say is maybe with a little time and alot of understanding it may eventually come to you. Link to comment
jonny15 Posted March 19, 2009 Share Posted March 19, 2009 18-25. 0. I know, what a shock right? lol Hopefully I can get into real numbers by 40. Or atleast get to cop a feel. Link to comment
Sparkly Eyes Posted March 19, 2009 Share Posted March 19, 2009 18-25. 0. I know, what a shock right? lol Hopefully I can get into real numbers by 40. Or atleast get to cop a feel. Do you mean natural numbers? or would you be happy with the 0.5 you get from oral sex too? Link to comment
jonny15 Posted March 19, 2009 Share Posted March 19, 2009 Do you mean natural numbers? or would you be happy with the 0.5 you get from oral sex too? What do you mean natural numbers? The .5 from oral would be good. It's better than the zero I have. I'd take about anything at this point. Link to comment
yankeefan74 Posted March 19, 2009 Share Posted March 19, 2009 But something like this seems more reliable to me that asking people on an internet forum or saying, . Unless it's completely anonymous (and you would think a message board would be anonymous, but it doesn't feel that way to people) you really aren't going to get an honest answer. Most men will vastly inflate the number of women they claim to have been with - and usually will count "opportunities" they believe they probably had but did not act on... Women tend to understate the actual number. You're actually not in the minority...as someone suggested earlier. These numbers you've quoted here are far more accurate than anything you'll get here. I will say that there is some surprising honesty from some of the guys here...always good to see. Link to comment
Johnathan Posted March 19, 2009 Share Posted March 19, 2009 Most men will vastly inflate the number of women they claim to have been with - and usually will count "opportunities" they believe they probably had but did not act on... Women tend to understate the actual number. True. A guy whos had 3 partners will say he's had 50 partners in order to boost his ego. A girl whos had 50 partners will say she's had 3 partners in order to boost her ego. Link to comment
shikashika Posted March 19, 2009 Share Posted March 19, 2009 True. A guy whos had 3 partners will say he's had 50 partners in order to boost his ego. A girl whos had 50 partners will say she's had 3 partners in order to boost her ego. I don't think this is true at all. I know of women who will boost their numbers and guys who will shave some off. Link to comment
yankeefan74 Posted March 19, 2009 Share Posted March 19, 2009 There are exceptions to every rule....that's a given. But men in general inflate the actual number, women tend to leave out a few. This has been documented for decades. If every man actually slept with the number of women he claimed, then the average for men between the ages of 20-60 wouldn't be 7...it'd be 27. And the average for women would be about 2. lol. The data every time this study is done proves Dr. House right yet again: "Everybody lies." Why? because of the same reasons society tends to put double standards on the sexes in the first place: Men who sleep around are studs, women who do the same thing are "easy." That social stigma still exists whether we like it or not. Link to comment
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