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Does my teacher like me?


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I have this teacher and from the moment I saw him I was physically attracted to him I'm 18 and he is mid forties the first time we met at orientation we kept making eye contact when someone else was talking since then I feel tension in the air Hes quite awkward around me and sometimes avoids eye contact he's not flirty but he stares at me when I'm not looking he smiles when I'm talking to others when I ask him a question he stands quite close to me there's alot of silences when we are alone in class together. He somewhat gives me special treatment like having a sneak peek of the test for the next day or giving me the weekend to finish the overdue project he calls me mate which confuses me. He seems shy but also not at the same time am I reading into this because I have feelings for him or is this nothing at all?

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11 minutes ago, Justwantingadvice020203 said:

 am I reading into this because I have feelings for him or is this nothing at all?

Yes you're reading into things. It's common to have a crush on the teacher but nothing indicates that he is interested in anything but being an appropriate teacher. 

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3 minutes ago, Justwantingadvice020203 said:

Would you by his actions he's attracted to me?

No. Please relax and accept that your crush is unrequited. You don't want to get a teacher in trouble because of your imagination. 

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23 minutes ago, Justwantingadvice020203 said:

Would you by his actions he's attracted to me?

Not really, no. 

You seem to be projecting because you like him and hope he feels the same, but I don't see anything tangible to suggest this is mutual. 

And even if it were, it is no-go zone for a teacher and student. You are also young enough to be his daughter. There is nothing to work with here. 

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20 hours ago, boltnrun said:

Is he married or in a relationship?

It's extremely common for students to develop crushes on their teachers.

What is your social like like? Do you have a friend group? Have you done any dating?

He's single and I have dated before 

 

On 4/5/2024 at 7:28 PM, Wiseman2 said:

Yes you're reading into things. It's common to have a crush on the teacher but nothing indicates that he is interested in anything but being an appropriate teacher. 

 

20 hours ago, boltnrun said:

Is he married or in a relationship?

It's extremely common for students to develop crushes on their teachers.

What is your social like like? Do you have a friend group? Have you done any dating?

 

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If he did have a crush on an 18 year old student, there'd be something mentally off with a man like that. As for you, your brain isn't fully mature, and won't be until you're about 25, so you have an excuse to be indulging in this fantasy.

But because it's likely interfering with your ability to concentrate on your studies, and preventing you from the possibility to bond with someone your own age, you should consider transferring to another class if you can't train your brain to put the brakes on your crush.

Ethically, you shouldn't accept any special privileges from him. It's not fair to your classmates.

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2 hours ago, Justwantingadvice020203 said:

He's single

This is irrelevant. It's ok to have a crush but it's not ok to let your imagination potentially harm someone's career. He's being professional and threatening you like any other student. He's probably trying to create boundaries because teacher crushes are common. But since you're a minor it's a little creepy. 

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I have a friend who married her professor -or maybe he was the teaching assistant.  But after the class was over.  Their age difference was minimal (grad school -both single adults).  When I was a TA in grad school one of my students -again close enough to my age- called me on a Saturday night to ask about the assignment and was a bit flirty.  My sense is he was trying to butter me up for a better grade but still -totally inappropriate (yes we were both single). Yes, I had a mild crush on the professor I worked with.  So handsome! I did zero about it -he was married, I kept it strictly professional -why? First of all -married. Second of all - these relationships - I mean teacher-student - can be so valuable professionally later in life.  Don't risk that by acting inappropriately. And if the professor does -depending on what it is - I know most institutions have ways of reporting it.  

Do not take special privileges - also because if your classmates find out that could affect their studies and grades too - that could invalidate the exam everyone studied for.  For example.  Do the right thing even when it's hard.  

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2 hours ago, Wiseman2 said:

He's being professional and threatening you like any other student.

Oops!

 

Crushes can be fun, but it's important to realize it's a crush and not reality.

Are there any nice young men at your school who you might like to date?

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2 hours ago, Justwantingadvice020203 said:

Freaking rude

No -realistic - this is his livelihood.  Professor positions are hard to come by from what I see as an outsider. Please don't mess with this.

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