Am I being scammed?...

[LaHermes]

1 hour ago, Gringo79 said:

I've also always had a thing for Hispanic women and culture. I believe, for the most part, latinas are more passionate and do not care as much about materialistic things,

You are in the U.S. gringo.

As other posters have pointed out there are thousands and thousands of Latina women in the U.S. 

1 hour ago, Gringo79 said:

I'm told that many men in latin america are too masculine, cheat often, and don't work. Likelwise, I've read that Latin women like American men because they are more passionate.

Generalizations!  There may well be some men like this in "Latin America" and  cheaters and the work-shy exist in every country, including the U.S. and over here as well.

And a man can never be "too masculine".  LOL.

If you want to travel to South America, experience the culture and see how you like it, why not?  Plan a holiday there, maybe a month if you can manage that.  Maybe if you meet her in person the whole situation might be entirely different. 

Meantime, you have only been talking online to this woman for a month. And, yes, she is only a picture on a screen.  

[Gringo79]

3 minutes ago, Wiseman2 said:

True. Make sure you come back with both your kidneys if you're going to Columbia.

hahaha...not Colombia

[LaHermes]

3 minutes ago, Tinydance said:

I don't think you should get too attached to this woman until you actually meet her. Keep in mind too that when someone is attractive, our mind automatically assumes they are nice and good. I think you need to try to separate appearances from who someone truly is as a person.

I utterly agree Tiny. 

[Tinydance]

Most Latino women are with men in their own country though so I wouldn't necessarily think they love American men or something like that. Many may feel stronger connection with their own culture and language and maybe don't speak that much English.

[Gringo79]

1 minute ago, LaHermes said:

You are in the U.S. gringo.

As other posters have pointed out there are thousands and thousands of Latina women in the U.S. 

Generalizations!  There may well be some men like this in "Latin America" and  cheaters and the work-shy exist in every country, including the U.S. and over here as well.

And a man can never be "too masculine".  LOL.

If you want to travel to South America, experience the culture and see how you like it, why not?  Plan a holiday there, maybe a month if you can manage that.  Maybe if you meet her in person the whole situation might be entirely different. 

Meantime, you have only been talking online to this woman for a month. And, yes, she is only a picture on a screen.  

Yes, I know there are many good latin american men also and my comments are stereotypical. I think my biggest concern is am I choosing not to see huge red flags because I'm emotionally attached at the moment. I've heard all the relationships schemes out there, which are real, but this one doesn't fit the case...she's not asking for anything (yet), isn't trying to get to the US. She just seems like a single mother who is looking for someone dependable and loving to work at life with someone and not on her own. 

[Tinydance]

1 minute ago, Gringo79 said:

Yes, I know there are many good latin american men also and my comments are stereotypical. I think my biggest concern is am I choosing not to see huge red flags because I'm emotionally attached at the moment. I've heard all the relationships schemes out there, which are real, but this one doesn't fit the case...she's not asking for anything (yet), isn't trying to get to the US. She just seems like a single mother who is looking for someone dependable and loving to work at life with someone and not on her own. 

Well my personal opinion is no harm in talking but definitely keep your options wide open. And if you can go visit her soon then I would suggest you go. How soon can you go there?

[LaHermes]

Look, Gringo, you never know. A month is too short a time one way or another.  So maybe she is not a scammer. She may well be genuine.  On the other hand any half-way skilled scammer does not ask straight up for anything, and certainly not within a month. 

What about the father of her children? 

And remember you are also just a face on a screen to her. How does she know you are "dependable". I am merely saying this so you can see it blows both ways.  You could tell her anything.  And so could she.

As I said earlier take a holiday to the country she is in (Equator, well that narrows it down lol) and see how it goes in person.

"The equator passes through three countries in South America. They are Ecuador, Colombia, and Brazil."

 

 

[Tinydance]

6 minutes ago, LaHermes said:

Look, Gringo, you never know. A month is too short a time one way or another.  So maybe she is not a scammer. She may well be genuine.  On the other hand any half-way skilled scammer does not ask straight up for anything, and certainly not within a month. 

What about the father of her children? 

And remember you are also just a face on a screen to her. How does she know you are "dependable". I am merely saying this so you can see it blows both ways.  You could tell her anything.  And so could she.

As I said earlier take a holiday to the country she is in (Equator, well that narrows it down lol) and see how it goes in person.

"The equator passes through three countries in South America. They are Ecuador, Colombia, and Brazil."

 

 

Actually, I'm bisexual and I'm sort of seeing a woman from Brazil. But she actually now lives in another city in Australia but it's a one hour flight. I don't think we'll really date though because she's polyamorous and I'm not. I did hook up with her though. Are you jealous Gringo!! Lol

[dias]

1 hour ago, Tinydance said:

To be honest I just get suspicious of people who are really attractive but they're looking for someone from another (more well off) country. Surely they can easily meet someone in their own country. So there seems to be some kind of ulterior motive...

1+1=2

[boltnrun]

I wonder if @Atlguywants to weigh in. He's in a similar situation. Different country though.

[LaHermes]

Look Gringo. If you want to get it out of your system do take a holiday in Ecuador.   Meet this woman. See how you feel. 

Guessing and wondering (and stereotyping) get us nowhere. 

[Batya33]

4 hours ago, Gringo79 said:

Yes, I agree, part of my mind is definitely suspicious. But so far I don't see anything where she might be caught up with some bad scheme. She works at an international airport 60 hours a week, she is un uniform like all the other people you see at an airport dressed up nicely. So from her appearance or her presentation, she's just like any other average good working person of society.

How do you know this is true - where she works and how many hours? Because she told you? I don't really understand what it means when you say you "love all women" -of course you don't -how could you? I would be very hesitant for the reasons everyone else wrote.

[gamon]

She'll ask you for something. Money, jewelry, marriage, citizenship.

It's coming.

[LaHermes]

On 5/28/2021 at 8:10 PM, lostandhurt said:

alk on the phone as much as possible so you can get a feel for her true self and if in a few months you are still interested take a short vacation and go visit her

IAgree with Lost. Once travel becomes easier and less restricted just go to that country for a holiday.  

 

[Tonight.majestic]

On 5/28/2021 at 3:10 PM, lostandhurt said:

A couple of things you need to be careful of: Make sure you have good anti virus software on your computer.  Scammers can embed a virus in the meta data in pictures and videos and then later get control and find banking info, passwords and the like.  

 

 

Can this also apply to messaging through apps like WhatsApp? 

[waffle]

On 5/28/2021 at 3:46 PM, LaHermes said:

And a man can never be "too masculine".  LOL.

I'm glad YOU said that. 😉 

[Wiseman2]

On 5/29/2021 at 12:46 AM, gamon said:

She'll ask you for something. Money, jewelry, marriage, citizenship.It'scoming.

Agree. Not going to kid you and say "oh this is different, you two are the real thing and you'll run away from your life with this beautiful exotic woman you met online."

At some level you already know this is not happening. 

Sadly you're the classic target. Fed up with local women, lonely, no luck with dating apps or relationships and a sucker for a pretty face who's miraculously in love with you already.

These situations are like quicksand. Once you get sucked in it's difficult to get out.

[boltnrun]

Yeah, her child or her mother will need "surgery" soon or something.

I could take a pic of myself in some fancy uniform and claim I'm an employee of whatever agency.  It's easy.

The only sure way to know if she's legit is to visit when it's safe to do so.  And do NOT stay with her!  Get a hotel or Air BnB.  And don't let her stay with you either.

[Tinydance]

Well, I think it might be OK to continue talking if you don't actually allow yourself to get scammed. If she asks for anything financially, don't give anything and just stop talking to her. If she never asks at any point then you have your proof that she's not a scammer. But if you're going to speak to women overseas you need to be really careful and have your wits about you.

[LaHermes]

4 minutes ago, boltnrun said:

And do NOT stay with her!  Get a hotel or Air BnB.  And don't let her stay with you either.

Absolutely, Bolt. 

All that said I don't think the OP is coming back to us!

[Tinydance]

Just now, LaHermes said:

Absolutely, Bolt. 

All that said I don't think the OP is coming back to us!

He's too busy with the hot Latin babe 😉

[Atlguy]

On 5/28/2021 at 1:22 PM, Gringo79 said:

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Posted just now

I'm gut instinct is 50/50 but I've been wrong on my instincts a number of times, better or worse. 

I live in a relatively small town and there's really no one I'm interested here so I've reached out to online dating a number of times. I've gone on some dates but none thrilled me. I've also always had a thing for Hispanic women and culture. I believe, for the most part, latinas are more passionate and do not care as much about materialistic things, they love deeply and family is their number one priority. I don't mean to stereotype or that all latinas are this way, but statistically it seems to be more than plausible.

As someone suggested, I'm chiming in.  I've experienced this too with women from South America.  Never sent any money and have had video chats.  Latin had been my first choice when I decided to stop looking where I am, as there's nobody to date here and American woman in my experience aren't willing to do distance.  I decided against a Latin woman mainly because I wanted someone more educated than what I was seeing on the websites and someone who could contribute more than just good looks.  But I will say I love the culture and their passion, so this was a tradeoff for me.  I just wasn't looking for a housewife. 

Now I've been with my fiancee from Ukraine since November 2019 and she gets here next week.  My life is about to drastically change, thankfully, as I'm sick of being alone.  I have confidence it will work as we actually did pre-marital counseling and covered all major topics.  No guarantees, but I was with my first wife 7 years and that didn't work.  I've learned a lot since then which also gives me confidence.  I can see if someone is genuinely interested and separate that from BS after being single for 12 years.  You need to develop that skill also.  That said, there's not enough in your original post to tell me if she's scamming you or not, but it is common.

[Atlguy]

On 5/28/2021 at 1:42 PM, Gringo79 said:

HAHA good point and also in consideration...I virtually had my bags packed to move south to FL, then Covid hit and killed the industry I'm working in, it's rebounding but stalled. So while the world was on lockdown I go onto a Latin Only dating website thinking I would potentially find someone to meet and likely they might want to move to the US. Likewise, I've always wanted to travel to latin countries so it seemed like it could be an opportunity. Well, I can't help that I developed feelings for this girl after talking with her for a month to find out she may not want to move to the US. Which might be fine, South America is getting better and more developed, and if I could find stable work in one of those countries and learn to speak the language, I would have no trouble relocating.

I told myself if I was still single in a few more years I was moving to Medellin, so yeah, I get it!!!

[Atlguy]

On 5/28/2021 at 2:00 PM, Gringo79 said:

Yes, I understand where you're coming from and how my situation sounds. Yes, I am attracted to latina women, but I also love all women. I'm purely basing this instance with the idea that I think this girl is beautiful to me, and from what she is saying she has a beautiful heart/soul and have developed feelings for her. I've only been reading about the "stereotypes" since after meeting her because I'm trying to figure out why she would want a gringo like me, what her culture is like, or something to help decide which way my gut feeling should go. 

However, I did go on a date a few months ago with a mexican latina who grew up in TX but lives in my state. Somehow the topic came up and she insisted will NEVER date a hispanic man because of "how they are" which I've heard and read about a number of times from other latina's  

Funny how that woks.  In high school, all my crushes were Cuban girls.  They never noticed me.  As an adult, I've dated several and if you find the right one it can be absolutely amazing.  As I got older, Latin women seemed to finally notice me, but sadly I never found the right one to marry and left South Florida for Atlanta in my late 20's.

[KittyCAT56]

She lacks experience in love. Don't blame her, blame yourself for not being upfront with her!