How can I learn to go to work when I desperately don't want to?

[Camber 2019]

We had teachers that threw chalkboard brushes at our head.

 

I'll bet you paid attention after that!!! Works better than having a "discussion" about why students should behave!!!

[itsallgrand]

Check out the previous thread. I'm confused because they sound opposite.

 

OP, can you please clarify?

 

Ok I guess it's not a joke.

Sounds like she was talking about her one week on a job.

That's she's had everything, including her education in full, taken care of for her up until this point in her life.

She doesn't have anything to gauge hard working or not yet, so probably means going to school.

 

OP, what's the job you have started? If it's well paying and prestigious, you are starting off a lot easier than the vast majority of folks.

[Seraphim]

Ok I guess it's not a joke.

Sounds like she was talking about her one week on a job.

That's she's had everything, including her education in full, taken care of for her up until this point in her life.

She doesn't have anything to gauge hard working or not yet, so probably means going to school.

 

OP, what's the job you have started? If it's well paying and prestigious, you are starting off a lot easier than the vast majority of folks.

 

Right ?

 

I started working for $3.25 an hour. So people will have to forgive me if I don’t cry.

[LaHermes]

Malvinka.

 

Why do you think your parents keep saying this:

 

"The worst part is that my parents keep repeating that work is a terrible thing that turns people into slaves that go to work, then go home, eat, go to bed and then again go to work on the next day." For sure there were certain employments where that might well have been the case. But that was their life, not yours.

 

I can only surmise that their work, whatever it was, consisted of total drudgery, and that they, mistakenly, want or wanted to "shield" you from what they perceive as drudgery, but did you a poor favour by projecting in that fashion.

[Tinydance]

The biggest problem I see here is a bad attitude. I mean of course we all have our own opinions but I think your opinion that doing nothing is great is quite detrimental. I work with people with disabilities and mental health issues and at times my work can be challenging of course. Sometimes I do think I'm sick of it and want to do something else/not do anything. But the thing is that I don't feel that doing nothing is good and I don't enjoy it.

 

Back in 2014 I was made redundant and spent a couple of months looking for a new job. I was going crazy staying at home and was really bored and restless. I'm very surprised that you actually enjoy doing basically nothing and not having any purpose in life, not having a routine, something to get up for. I think the fact that you think like that is not common at all and is very surprising.

 

Most people want to do something with their time, even if it's just to have something to occupy themselves with and connect with their community. Some of the people I support at work have intellectual or physical disabilities and they already receive a pension from the government to live on, plus a lot of funding for life support. One lives with his parents. So technically he doesn't have to work or do anything at all. But for seven years now he volunteers in an OP shop twice a week, and also on a Wednesday has a paid job delivering catalogues. He enjoys his work and getting to know people and feels fulfilled from it.

 

I understand that working is scary and nerve wrecking. It might also be not enjoyable if you don't like the actual work you do. I'm not surprised that you're feeling anxious about work but I'm just surprised that you like doing nothing. I understand being a homebody but even most people who are a homebody have jobs, study, volunteer, do at least something with their time.

 

To be honest I think that even your friends might get bored with you eventually if you don't do anything because you won't have anything to talk about. They'll have jobs and things going on in their life and you won't. Plus you need money to live and catch up with friends. And at your age living off your parents when you have no disabilities or illness is a pretty bad look. If you want to find a relationship it won't be a good look either. We don't live in a time where women are just housewives anymore. Men still want their wife to do something with herself.

 

You really have to change your attitude and if you have a more positive attitude about working, you might feel better. If you don't like this job then study something to get a different qualification or get another job.

[Cherylyn]

I'm thinking back when I was your age. I think your problem is that you've had it too easy all your life. You weren't desperate as I was. My father died when I was young girl. I've worked ever since I was 14 years old as a waitress at my parent's restaurant business, worked at an amusement park, worked my way through college, worked full time night shift while financially supporting my widowed mother and siblings and life was darned hard! I didn't have time to wallow in my misery and pity pot. I was too busy putting food on the table. When I transferred to my full time day shift job, I felt grateful to be able to get ahead in life.

 

I think your problem is that you don't have a life other than work. You need outlets and balance. If you're religious, join a church, get involved with serving at church, ministry groups and savor being with your brethren. Or, volunteer in your community, do charitable good works, for example. If not, expand your social life in a safe, healthy, moral way. Surround yourself with upstanding people outside your work life so you have a happy schedule and work-life balance. Then when you realize other people are doing the same thing as you are with work and having a happy life outside work, you'll be convinced that this is how life is. People work, play, enjoy their own time, have bills to pay, families, friends and repeat. Welcome to the real world, Malvinka.

 

You need an attitude adjustment. Think differently. When you can afford it, get a roommate and move out. You'll enjoy your financial independence.

 

Take good care of your health. Make time for exercise. You'll feel better mentally and physically. You'll become a more positive person with high self esteem, self worth and confidence. Make a change.

[Wiseman2]

My advice remains the same: https://www.enotalone.com/forum/showthread.php?t=562510&p=7177870&viewfull=1#post7177870

Hello, I'm a 24 year old girl and my parents supported me financially.

It's been 1 week since I started my first job and I'm horrified if I'll ever get used to this lifestyle. I realize that I have no other alternative but to work since otherwise, I will have to become a homeless person, which is the worst.

[RayRay63]

Having browsed both threads I have formed the view that this is a troll.

 

If I am wrong, then the answer is the OP should get some professional help for avoidance behaviors.