New to dating. is it possible he likes me/

[figureitout23]

of course as soon as i post, he replies "ready to get off work" yeah he has told me before he works 60+ hours and im over here overthinking. omfg. i def going to need to stop acting like that.

 

i just make myself look SOOO dumb..

 

You don't seem to want anything to change, seems like you just want to be soothed when your anxiety gets bad.

[Imjustagirl222]

No, I do want change and I do like my anxiety soothed.

 

I am also co-dependent and it's really hard to fix that as you get validation from people who like u, etc. Im pushing myself to do beter, but it'll take time.

[Batya33]

of course as soon as i post, he replies "ready to get off work" yeah he has told me before he works 60+ hours and im over here overthinking. omfg. i def going to need to stop acting like that.

 

i just make myself look SOOO dumb..

Those texts are irrelevant to whether he wants to date you. I would not text with him unless he asks you out on a date he plans in advance and then shows up for the date. I would not be confrontational - I suggested above how to interact "thanks for responding -I'm doing fine just too busy to text right now - if you want to get together again let me know and if I'm available we'll make a plan"

[Imjustagirl222]

Those texts are irrelevant to whether he wants to date you. I would not text with him unless he asks you out on a date he plans in advance and then shows up for the date. I would not be confrontational - I suggested above how to interact "thanks for responding -I'm doing fine just too busy to text right now - if you want to get together again let me know and if I'm available we'll make a plan"

 

Yeah, I asked him if he wanted to go to coffee......i said screw it. I'll ask. And his replies just seem so "Meh"

[Imjustagirl222]

[ATTACH=CONFIG]11422[/ATTACH][ATTACH=CONFIG]11423[/ATTACH]

 

 

the "elll yeaaaa" thing is funny that he added it, i joke hm for saying it bc he says it in the funniest voice!! [i secretly find it adorable lol]

[Batya33]

Yeah, I asked him if he wanted to go to coffee......i said screw it. I'll ask. And his replies just seem so "Meh"

 

It depends on your goals. I practiced restraint when I dated and did very very little of "screw it' because in my experience restraint -letting the man do more of the contacting and asking out in the beginning and not settling for scraps/last minute plans, etc - was better for the long term and specifically for the type of relationship and marriage I was striving for. I had no problem asking out men and I did so -just wasn't an effective way to find a long term relationship. I did actively show interest in other ways -not by being a chat buddy but in many ways.

[Imjustagirl222]

It depends on your goals. I practiced restraint when I dated and did very very little of "screw it' because in my experience restraint -letting the man do more of the contacting and asking out in the beginning and not settling for scraps/last minute plans, etc - was better for the long term and specifically for the type of relationship and marriage I was striving for. I had no problem asking out men and I did so -just wasn't an effective way to find a long term relationship. I did actively show interest in other ways -not by being a chat buddy but in many ways.

 

Yeah, Idk why i always do this. How did you show interest in other ways?

 

I suck when it comes to guys!!

 

I texted a few others that i've been chatting with, and also asked them to coffee and they responded quite quickly and seemed excited that I had I asked. However if u read this guys response thati posted in the pics above...he seems very short? idk.

[Batya33]

Yeah, Idk why i always do this. How did you show interest in other ways?

 

I suck when it comes to guys!!

 

I texted a few others that i've been chatting with, and also asked them to coffee and they responded quite quickly and seemed excited that I had I asked. However if u read this guys response thati posted in the pics above...he seems very short? idk.

 

I couldn't click on that. Of course many men are excited to be asked out - in my experience which was very typical of everyone I knew (and this was over 10 years ago - but I've heard, at least anecdotally, that not much has changed) -that most men would be flattered to be asked out and might see it as "brave" on the woman's part. And, that was typically not the woman with whom they saw long term potential. I remember having guy friends tell me how great it was to be asked out and how they were confused as to why it kind of took the wind out of their sails too. Two main reasons -first, most men, even shy men (like my husband was way back when -so very shy) will ask out a woman if they are interested and available even if she doesn't show much interest. There are some exceptions. For me the exceptions likely wouldn't have worked for me long term - for example so shy (but available) that he couldn't ask me out for coffee probably would not have been a good match for me long term. Or, a man who was just not into making plans in advance in general, liked to be "spontaneous" with all plans no matter what - that probably would have been too extreme for me for the long term but might work for others especially women who like to be in control of all planning.

 

I do think there's somewhat more acceptance of women asking men out so that the men don't get turned off, etc. I do think it's great to ask for a first meet on a dating site to see if you two should go on a date in the future.

 

How I showed interest? Flirting, learning about the person's likes/values/hobbies/activities - reading up on it as needed -so I could carry my part of the conversation and show that I was interested in getting to know him as a person, responding with enthusiasm when he suggested a plan, being open to trying new activities and being actively involved in suggesting things to do/places to go, being very well-read including on current events, being a good and active listener - similar to making new platonic friends except for the flirting part! Also I had confident body language and tried to be positive in every aspect including vibes/energy, etc. And giving him plenty of space to get to know me - being a package to be unwrapped rather than letting it all hang out.

[Imjustagirl222]

I couldn't click on that. Of course many men are excited to be asked out - in my experience which was very typical of everyone I knew (and this was over 10 years ago - but I've heard, at least anecdotally, that not much has changed) -that most men would be flattered to be asked out and might see it as "brave" on the woman's part. And, that was typically not the woman with whom they saw long term potential. I remember having guy friends tell me how great it was to be asked out and how they were confused as to why it kind of took the wind out of their sails too. Two main reasons -first, most men, even shy men (like my husband was way back when -so very shy) will ask out a woman if they are interested and available even if she doesn't show much interest. There are some exceptions. For me the exceptions likely wouldn't have worked for me long term - for example so shy (but available) that he couldn't ask me out for coffee probably would not have been a good match for me long term. Or, a man who was just not into making plans in advance in general, liked to be "spontaneous" with all plans no matter what - that probably would have been too extreme for me for the long term but might work for others especially women who like to be in control of all planning.

 

I do think there's somewhat more acceptance of women asking men out so that the men don't get turned off, etc. I do think it's great to ask for a first meet on a dating site to see if you two should go on a date in the future.

 

How I showed interest? Flirting, learning about the person's likes/values/hobbies/activities - reading up on it as needed -so I could carry my part of the conversation and show that I was interested in getting to know him as a person, responding with enthusiasm when he suggested a plan, being open to trying new activities and being actively involved in suggesting things to do/places to go, being very well-read including on current events, being a good and active listener - similar to making new platonic friends except for the flirting part! Also I had confident body language and tried to be positive in every aspect including vibes/energy, etc. And giving him plenty of space to get to know me - being a package to be unwrapped rather than letting it all hang out.

 

Yeaeh I definitely need to work on showing interest and stuff. I dont feel like im good at it, i thnk i may even come off to a guy like i am not interested! but i am also kinda shy. but im surprised to find that asking them out for coffee, i didnt really feel shy about it.

 

 

Ok this is how the convo went:

 

"Wanna have coffee sometime?" - me

 

Sure thang - him

 

When? - me

 

Maybe Wed or thurs? - him

 

Ok that should work - me

 

Kk - him

 

Mhmm just gotta let me know the time in advance - Me

 

Elll yeaaa - him

 

Two?? - him

 

"Alright! that'll prolly work!" - me

 

that was last night, then around noon today I said "Yo what day do you wanna do?"

 

No reply yet from that. I have to know bc i have kids, etc. cant just leap when he says leap.

 

Maybe its just not what im used to, but he just seems really short with me.

[Imjustagirl222]

I feel like i come off in person a certain way maybe? idk im pretty energetic, easy going, and i have fun. i feel like a lot of men will feel like im a "cool chick" but i have heard before that they didnt think i liked them

[Cope]

Imjustagirl, I could be writing this whole thread.

 

I am new to dating too. I was always in LTR until I had enough and I decided to stay single for a while.3 months ago I decided to try dating, so I signed up on tinder. I used to think I was horrible on having casual relationships and that it wasn't my type.Well, it is my type and I think it can be anyone's type,as long as you are in the mood. You just came out of a serious and abusive relationship. You do know yourself which is super, so don't be fast to judge yourself on whether you can do this or not. You need time.

 

Of course what you want now is more than casual and that's what you looked for.Many of men are flirting with you but you picked the one you liked most. Bare with me. Casual relationships are easier with people you are not really fond of. But more specifically in your case, you got attached more because that's what you are used to. I had the same problem with my first casual fling. Everything was wrong about him, he was a flake, I just felt attracted to him and the sex was decent, still when he vanished I got mad and I was like wth? Why am mad? He was totally not for me. So I worked on my self and the next encounters went brilliantly and smoothly. Except the last one which there was a spark. Sparks make you "catch feelings" specially if you let them, specially if the other person is good at helping you get there.Knows exactly what to say, how to say it etc etc. So be careful about the ones you really like, you can't be casual with those unfortunately.

 

I'm trying to train myself to be straightforward with the ones I really like. Like, ok we said it would be casual, but I have started to have feelings, so either we stop doing this or we continue with different terms if you feel the same way. It's ok to change our mind, these things happen all the time.

 

Just wanted to say that.

[Imjustagirl222]

Imjustagirl, I could be writing this whole thread.

 

I am new to dating too. I was always in LTR until I had enough and I decided to stay single for a while.3 months ago I decided to try dating, so I signed up on tinder. I used to think I was horrible on having casual relationships and that it wasn't my type.Well, it is my type and I think it can be anyone's type,as long as you are in the mood. You just came out of a serious and abusive relationship. You do know yourself which is super, so don't be fast to judge yourself on whether you can do this or not. You need time.

 

Of course what you want now is more than casual and that's what you looked for.Many of men are flirting with you but you picked the one you liked most. Bare with me. Casual relationships are easier with people you are not really fond of. But more specifically in your case, you got attached more because that's what you are used to. I had the same problem with my first casual fling. Everything was wrong about him, he was a flake, I just felt attracted to him and the sex was decent, still when he vanished I got mad and I was like wth? Why am mad? He was totally not for me. So I worked on my self and the next encounters went brilliantly and smoothly. Except the last one which there was a spark. Sparks make you "catch feelings" specially if you let them, specially if the other person is good at helping you get there.Knows exactly what to say, how to say it etc etc. So be careful about the ones you really like, you can't be casual with those unfortunately.

 

I'm trying to train myself to be straightforward with the ones I really like. Like, ok we said it would be casual, but I have started to have feelings, so either we stop doing this or we continue with different terms if you feel the same way. It's ok to change our mind, these things happen all the time.

 

Just wanted to say that.

 

yeah exactly. thank you.

 

if you were me would u just walk away right now? i also have dated in forever, AM co dependent {so my view of things could be warped} but yeah. we've only known each other for 1 week.

 

sooooooooo am i being over needy, or is he clearly not interested

[Cope]

yeah exactly. thank you.

 

if you were me would u just walk away right now?

 

I think I am in your shoes right now with this guy. I am distancing myself to see what he will do. I don't know if it's the right move but all of his signals shows that he's not interested as much as I am, so I decided to step back. It's hard and it's only been two days. So , yes, I would walk away, or at least step back.

 

It's very confusing. I am used everything happening naturally, then all of a sudden there are all these casual things going on with vague rules. Egos are sky high and no ones actually hugging because it complicates things. And it does.

 

i also have dated in forever, AM co dependent {so my view of things could be warped} but yeah. we've only known each other for 1 week.

 

sooooooooo am i being over needy, or is he clearly not interested

 

My views are f*ed up! LOL!

 

Needy? What is needy? I am so sick and tired of hearing this. They keep on telling us "We come off as too needy', wth is needy? Just because you may want something more?Needy is the worse word to describe this. I think of needy as an obsessed person who spams you daily with 20 messages. Wanting something more is not needing, it's normal and a natural turn out. Needy, is a feeling that reeks of insecurities. Having some insecurities in the beginning of relationships and some small obsessions is normal. I read a articles of how they found that the hormone levels of people in love are the same as people with OCD. Coincidence? Don't think so. So let's not be harsh on ourselves and other with this word.

 

In your case,you led him to believe you're ok with casual and at first you were, you just changed your mind and wanted something more. He doesn't seem as interested as you are. You already made sure of that when he didn't reply to your question about the time. I had something similar happen to me with another guy. I asked for a date and time and he called me too organized and eventually tried to reschedule basically to make me cancel. So yeah, if a person is not willing to see you, they're not worth our time.Texting is good to one point and hugely misunderstood. Back to the point, you already sent enough messages to feel what his intentions are, you gave him a lot of chances and good for you. Step back to see what happens. In the meantime, keep chatting with other guys and even dating. Don't wait around for him, I found that it helps A LOT. Keeping your options open helps you see that there are plenty of better guys out there and also helps you see the flaws in the other one.

[Imjustagirl222]

I think I am in your shoes right now with this guy. I am distancing myself to see what he will do. I don't know if it's the right move but all of his signals shows that he's not interested as much as I am, so I decided to step back. It's hard and it's only been two days. So , yes, I would walk away, or at least step back.

 

It's very confusing. I am used everything happening naturally, then all of a sudden there are all these casual things going on with vague rules. Egos are sky high and no ones actually hugging because it complicates things. And it does.

 

 

 

My views are f*ed up! LOL!

 

Needy? What is needy? I am so sick and tired of hearing this. They keep on telling us "We come off as too needy', wth is needy? Just because you may want something more?Needy is the worse word to describe this. I think of needy as an obsessed person who spams you daily with 20 messages. Wanting something more is not needing, it's normal and a natural turn out. Needy, is a feeling that reeks of insecurities. Having some insecurities in the beginning of relationships and some small obsessions is normal. I read a articles of how they found that the hormone levels of people in love are the same as people with OCD. Coincidence? Don't think so. So let's not be harsh on ourselves and other with this word.

 

In your case,you led him to believe you're ok with casual and at first you were, you just changed your mind and wanted something more. He doesn't seem as interested as you are. You already made sure of that when he didn't reply to your question about the time. I had something similar happen to me with another guy. I asked for a date and time and he called me too organized and eventually tried to reschedule basically to make me cancel. So yeah, if a person is not willing to see you, they're not worth our time.Texting is good to one point and hugely misunderstood. Back to the point, you already sent enough messages to feel what his intentions are, you gave him a lot of chances and good for you. Step back to see what happens. In the meantime, keep chatting with other guys and even dating. Don't wait around for him, I found that it helps A LOT. Keeping your options open helps you see that there are plenty of better guys out there and also helps you see the flaws in the other one.

 

what do u do when u distance urself? just keep busy, and dont contact them??

 

exactly!!! I never would never text him daily with like 20 messages. i might go nuts waiting for his reply, but i leave it be, and I never double text. and he will always reply to my texts, but he just takes FOREVER lately...like HOURS!! and aside from him telling me the first night we met that he's really independent and doesnt have much time to text, it still bothers me. because there has been a few time he DOES reply quickly.

 

he responded last night about the time. he said 2. but i text him TODAY at like 11:37 about what day we should do? i have to know because of my kids you know... (i didnt saythat) and its now past 4 and no reply like even if ur busy it takes like 2.5 seconds to reply with the date. and tomorrow is also my BIRTHDAY....he knows that. he wished me a happy early birthday yesterday when i told him it was.

 

Ugh...SO odd. in person he acts like super affectionate, and like he is my bf! he pretty much fell asleep on my lap last time we hung out at his apartment watching movies. he hugs/ kisses/ cuddles me often. so i just find IT really...really..odd.

 

i do chat with other men, and i asked them to coffee too lol they seemed more excited and they actually ask me things about my life and talk to me a lot, but i just seem to find myself wanting to see the one who takes hours to reply again!!

[Jibralta]

in person he acts like super affectionate, and like he is my bf! he pretty much fell asleep on my lap last time we hung out at his apartment watching movies. he hugs/ kisses/ cuddles me often. so i just find IT really...really..odd.

 

I just want to say, some people are naturally affectionate. Kissing and cuddling doesn't mean much to them. He might do this with ALL the girls. In other words, it don't mean much.

 

i have to know because of my kids you know... (i didnt saythat) and its now past 4 and no reply like even if ur busy it takes like 2.5 seconds to reply with the date. and tomorrow is also my BIRTHDAY....he knows that. he wished me a happy early birthday yesterday when i told him it was.

 

What you should do is judge by what you need. We know that you need affection (he fulfills this criteria), and you need someone who is sensitive to the fact that you have kids (he's a big FAIL here)!! You want someone who replies in a timely manner (FAIL--there's really no partial credit if it's inconsistent). And you want someone who thinks your birthday is important. Well, he's not acting that way; he's leaving you in limbo.

 

So he's affectionate, oblivious to parenting, a haphazard communicator, and seemingly indifferent to special occasions like your birthday.

 

He satisfies 1/4 of your needs. 1.5 if we're generous about the birthday thing. But that's still less than 50%.

 

Don't tell me he's a fixer-upper!

[Imjustagirl222]

I just want to say, some people are naturally affectionate. Kissing and cuddling doesn't mean much to them. He might do this with ALL the girls. In other words, it don't mean much.

 

 

 

What you should do is judge by what you need. We know that you need affection (he fulfills this criteria), and you need someone who is sensitive to the fact that you have kids (he's a big FAIL here)!! You want someone who replies in a timely manner (FAIL--there's really no partial credit if it's inconsistent). And you want someone who thinks your birthday is important. Well, he's not acting that way; he's leaving you in limbo.

 

So he's affectionate, oblivious to parenting, a haphazard communicator, and seemingly indifferent to special occasions like your birthday.

 

He satisfies 1/4 of your needs. 1.5 if we're generous about the birthday thing. But that's still less than 50%.

 

Don't tell me he's a fixer-upper!

 

 

Lol!! I typically DO go for fixer uppers. My ex was. He was addicted to drugs, and alcohol when I met him. By the time we split up he wasnt, and alot of that was due to me pushing him to get rid of it.

 

But this guy is pretty independent. Not my usual. I really didnt think he would pay much attention to my birthday bc we arent together or anything.

 

Ugh. So annoying. Hes so confusing thru text, but very easy to relate to in person

[Cope]

what do u do when u distance urself? just keep busy, and dont contact them??

 

I try to distract myself with something I love doing or work. But, logging on here really helps me and talking about similar situations helps get my thoughts in order and weirdly enough, stop obsessing. It doesn't work for everyone. And yes, don't contact them. For me that's the easiest part. TOday started off sad because I didn't get a message. I told myself I can check my phone at specific times etc. Talking with you guys helped alot and by the end of the day I'm in the " If he wants me, he will text" mood. Sidenote, I was giving myself a hard time because maybe e thinks I was not as interested but I keep seeing my last message, and in general behavior in chat and I'm like, hell no! It's obvious he just doesn't want to text. Did something happen to him?Is he just having too much of a good time? Who knows? Who cares? If he wants me, he will text. I am planning to text at some point, I'm just not feeling it yet.

 

 

 

 

Ugh...SO odd. in person he acts like super affectionate, and like he is my bf! he pretty much fell asleep on my lap last time we hung out at his apartment watching movies. he hugs/ kisses/ cuddles me often. so i just find IT really...really..odd.

 

As Jibralta pointed out, this does not mean a thing. I had a guy like this a couple of months ago, we cuddled, it was so sweet, I 'm even considering calling him again just for the cuddles! But this is how he acts. He disappeared every week. It was super casual, but it's just the way he has sex.

 

i do chat with other men, and i asked them to coffee too lol they seemed more excited and they actually ask me things about my life and talk to me a lot, but i just seem to find myself wanting to see the one who takes hours to reply again!!

 

He's just the first one, or at least the first one you caught feelings for.I will pass I promise. Do what Jibralta mentioned, count at what he's good at, nothing really. You might be in love with the idea of him. You might have fell in love with what you think of an ideal man and mirrored it on him. We all do that.

 

 

Bottom line, step back , wait for him to reply. He most likely will. Just maybe not when you want him to or what you want him to text. (Well, don't wait, by all means keep dating other people.)

[Imjustagirl222]

I try to distract myself with something I love doing or work. But, logging on here really helps me and talking about similar situations helps get my thoughts in order and weirdly enough, stop obsessing. It doesn't work for everyone. And yes, don't contact them. For me that's the easiest part. TOday started off sad because I didn't get a message. I told myself I can check my phone at specific times etc. Talking with you guys helped alot and by the end of the day I'm in the " If he wants me, he will text" mood. Sidenote, I was giving myself a hard time because maybe e thinks I was not as interested but I keep seeing my last message, and in general behavior in chat and I'm like, hell no! It's obvious he just doesn't want to text. Did something happen to him?Is he just having too much of a good time? Who knows? Who cares? If he wants me, he will text. I am planning to text at some point, I'm just not feeling it yet.

 

 

 

 

 

 

As Jibralta pointed out, this does not mean a thing. I had a guy like this a couple of months ago, we cuddled, it was so sweet, I 'm even considering calling him again just for the cuddles! But this is how he acts. He disappeared every week. It was super casual, but it's just the way he has sex.

 

 

 

He's just the first one, or at least the first one you caught feelings for.I will pass I promise. Do what Jibralta mentioned, count at what he's good at, nothing really. You might be in love with the idea of him. You might have fell in love with what you think of an ideal man and mirrored it on him. We all do that.

 

 

Bottom line, step back , wait for him to reply. He most likely will. Just maybe not when you want him to or what you want him to text. (Well, don't wait, by all means keep dating other people.)

 

 

haha yeah ugh~~!!! wish me luck on stepping back...bc im struggling.

 

8 hours now, no reply on whether we are hanging out tomorrow or thursday i dont wanna ask again, wouldnt that be too much? in my eyes, yes. meh if he seriously blows me off it isnt worth the effort bc i feel like i am making all the effort here!

[Batya33]

I think it's fine to change your mind, fine to be open about having changed your mind. However, when it comes to dating it's better to know your own mind and heart and goals and values in advance because even though it's fine, it can create issues early on and give the impression that you're flaky even though you don't mean to be. So, obviously you might meet someone where you're really into the person the first few dates and then change your mind. That's typical. What creates the issue is telling someone who claims not to be looking for a relationship "me too, so that's fine with me" when in your heart of hearts you know that that's not entirely true and you're settling because there's sexual attraction, or loneliness, or whatever. And you change your mind because you start to feel attached -and when that happens you're bound to act clingier because you know that you agreed to a casual arrangement early on. Try to short circuit that by being honest with yourself from the get go and not settling for less than you are looking for.

[Imjustagirl222]

yep you are right.

 

im just feelign failed tonight. kinda upset. i knew obviously that im not priority to him yet i hung on anyways. I do NOT like chasing guys i hate it! aka i end up chasing idiots who dont really like me like i like them

 

Im not even going to ask him anything more. Im not begging or chasing anyone to hangout. Waste of time. I have two other guys who were happy i asked them for coffee, and if we have a good time than we do. Not expecting anything out of them either.

[Batya33]

yep you are right.

 

im just feelign failed tonight. kinda upset. i knew obviously that im not priority to him yet i hung on anyways. I do NOT like chasing guys i hate it! aka i end up chasing idiots who dont really like me like i like them

 

Im not even going to ask him anything more. Im not begging or chasing anyone to hangout. Waste of time. I have two other guys who were happy i asked them for coffee, and if we have a good time than we do. Not expecting anything out of them either.

 

You didn't chase him. No one should chase anyone else. This is a person you barely know and dating requires a really thick skin. I don't think your reaction has much to do with this particular person.

 

The only expectation you should have out of meeting someone for coffee is that you'll show up and he will, and have a pleasant conversation. Unless and until there is another date planned, there is no other date planned. Not from a negative perspective, just reality. Being cynical about it is self-sabotaging- expect that you'll have a pleasant time - what else could you possible expect out of someone you barely know?

[Imjustagirl222]

yea i dont have super thick skin. guess ill have to work on that.

 

im going to ask one more time if he stll wants to go i have to know the date so i can get a sittter. if not then i will not text him again. bc thats my clear answer of his interest

[Batya33]

yea i dont have super thick skin. guess ill have to work on that.

 

im going to ask one more time if he stll wants to go i have to know the date so i can get a sittter. if not then i will not text him again. bc thats my clear answer of his interest

 

I think you already have a clear answer- his silence. I would not ask him again. If he contacts you last minute tell him that it's too last minute since you had to make arrangements in advance for a sitter. Don't indulge in "I have to ask him again because I need a sitter" -have standards about your precious free time so that people who want to see you have to treat you properly and give you enough advance notice.

[Cope]

Definitely don't send a text again just like Batya is suggesting! The only message this will convey is, he can text you whenever he wants. You make him more important than anything. That's what he will understand if you sned him one more message. You already have your answer, if he wanted to see you he would have at least answer about the time.

 

Stay cool, keep writing here and don;t touch your phone!

[Imjustagirl222]

great i already asked him bc i had to get a sitter.

 

i knew that was a bad idea. some other people told me to ask him again. . idk i am so frustrated right now. why do i do this to myself? its my birthday which is depressing as well. i am under so much stress in general right now.

 

NOW i look needy for texting him..