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Girlfriend says she doesn't love me


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So for about 9 months I've been dating this amazing girl who has just been so fun to be around and has showed me a lot. We hung out a lot. We got along so well, absolutely no fighting whatsoever. We are both 20 years old and go to different colleges. We did the long distance for awhile and seemed to be going great then one day her roommate breaks up with her boyfriend because they we doing long distance as well and then proceeds to tell my girlfriend that long distance will never work and you're better off letting him go and all that stuff. She then texts me letting me know this is not working and breaks up with me. We were apart for like a week in a half and then she contacts me crying telling me to take her back. She comes home for summer and we date again everything is going good for months and we are seeing each other a lot having a good time. Now her family is having issues where the parents have just got divorced and the younger brother is doing drugs, along with those problems the family has financial issues. I help her giving her advice with all of that, and she has said I've helped her out with a lot. She holds a lot of things in and I think that doesn't help the case. Recently she tells me out of the blue she has lost feelings for me and doesn't love me anymore. She said she for sure did love me before, and also adding that she is not happy anymore, that her mind and heart are telling her she needs to break up with me even though she doesn't want to. This girl always talked about kids and the future and marriage. She said she doesn't want to pretend anymore. Said she has been feeling this way for 3 weeks.How could she just lose feelings like that? We have now been broken up for 2 weeks and we haven't talked in 1 week. She couldn't even face me for the break up because she didn't want to break down in front of me. She is now going to school really close to me but seems like she doesn't want to talk or anything right now. How do I get her back? What is she going through? Will she comeback?

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Sorry to hear this and that she seemed unduly influenced by the roommate. But it also sounds like she's quite confused/stressed. It may be best to wait for her to reach out.

She then texts me letting me know this is not working and breaks up with me.Recently she tells me out of the blue she has lost feelings for me and doesn't love me anymore. We have now been broken up for 2 weeks and we haven't talked in 1 week.
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She said this time she is "done" for good and not coming back. Idk what's going on with her. She says she is not looking for anybody else and wants to be alone for awhile and focus on her school career. She said we can "start over" but doesn't want to feel like she has to come home to see me from school.

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I haven't talked to her in a week, I've been trying to just give her space. I don't think she wants to talk right now.


Good idea. Give her space to collect herself and if she wants to come back, she probably will.

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You are absoluetly right, no one on this forum can say with 100% certainty that your X will or will not come back, and there are stories of people getting back together. Here is the trick. Since you dont know you have two options. You can put your life on hold and then get mad when she doesnt come back because you wasted your time. Or you can move on with your life, and place yourself in a position where if she does want to come back, you have a clear mind on weather you want her in your life or not.


It takes two to be in a relationship and since she doesnt want to be with you in one then you just have to let her go. Dont worry, she knows where you live and get a hold of you. If she wants to come back it doesnt matter where you are or what you are doing, she will find you. So dont stay still and put your life on pause. Go out with friends, have a good time, stay active, eat, sleep, do whatever you want that makes you happy. She let you go, the relationship is over.

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Flash.. you are in denial and confused. I get ya, I totally get you. You dont want to admit that its over. So you go back and you look for those little things to justify your thoughts. "We just saw one another" " We talked of marriage" and things like that. You are grasping at straws and holding on to the past promises.

Im giong to be harsh on you but its tough love. You have to accept that its over. She broke up with you, she told you she wasnt happy and she doesnt want to be in a relationship with you anymore.

Its hard to accept that. I know it. I know its easier said than done, but the sooner you accept the current situation, the sooner you can begin to heal.

There is nothing you did wrong, nothing you can say or do to change it, nothing that will bring her back to you. There is no magic sentence, word or gesture you can do. She knows exactly what she has in you, she has seen every side of you and she has still said No more.

This is okay tho. Break ups happen and odds are you are going to meet a better girl for you. Someone that wants to be with you. You should never beg someone to be with you. They should want to be with you because they like you. This girl was meant to be with someone else, and you were meant to find another person too. And thats how life goes.

You are going to be okay. Might not seem like it now, but you will be. In the long run youll fall in love and probably get married too. Its just not going to be with this girl. Let her go and begin a new chapter of your life

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if she lets her friends influence her, you do not want to be with her and she is not mature enough..thats if you guys didn't have any legit issues..



I have a feeling she will come back maybe multiple times. This is my gut feeling but they probably wont be for the way you like.



Be very careful. I would make it clear that unless its to work on you guys then you don't want to talk..



trust me bread crumbs will destroy you inside. do not be her friend. Its not selfish its for you to heal.


I also would not contact her for anything.

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Maintain your dignity, the best revenge is for her to see you moving on with your life and dating good looking girls. And whatever you do, don't fork out money on get your girlfriend back websites. They're all swindlers looking to exploit people in your situation.

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