Is it easy getting a gf outside the US?

[iwishiknew]

I never had a gf before and my friend told me that I would be able to get a gf easily if I was in a different country like Poland, Russia, Ireland etc. He tells me that a lot of girls in different countries are easy going, relaxed, not so dam picky and shallow when it comes height and attraction toward dating. I'm not sure if that is true or not because I never been outside the US. If I had the $$$ I would love to explorer different countries and I believe I would find a gf.

[Crank]

Well... i hear girls in some parts of the us are very "difficult" as they play the game so much that there just snobby picky bitc.. (like if they live in a big city)

That aside, i assume it's going to be the same

[mhowe]

Do you speak Polish or Russian? Irish girls are very picky.

[lancelot873]

Sounds like you need to get out and socialize more and you can make that decision yourself. there is no "easy" way. easy come, easy go. so strap in, and get out and talk to more girls. this could be a topic for you and a girl..are girls in North America more difficult than girls outside? it's strictly opinion based and shows you how shallow they may or may not be. as open ended questions, and find more things to question about.

 

good luck.

[thejigsup]

As long as you are not a midget or broke, we aren't that picky here. What, are you too short or not good looking or rich enough? Just kidding, but if you think girls are picky, try dating guys! Never seen more 3s thinking they deserve 9s or 10s than in the good ol' USA.

[greta96]

There is another thread here somewhere posted by a guy who is thinking of doing the same thing, you may want to read that one.

All I will say here is that European women are just as picky as American ones, usually more. They are usually tall themselves, very pretty, very well educated, so their standards are high. I'm not quite sure why the rest of the world thinks those women are easier to get, because it's quite the opposite. And if you do eventually manage to get one of those, then you should worry about your finances because something is fishy - there is a reason for you being chosen, that has nothing to do with you being a great guy or with love.

Work on yourself and better yourself so that you can meet American women's standards, it's safer and costs you less money too.

[agent1607307371]

It's true, once you get outside of America we're all so desperate we'll take anything.

 

Your friend is messing with you.

[Beccy]

As a foreign girl myself...

 

I can tell you that, no, I do not care about a guy's height or how rich he is, or (except only passingly) his looks...personality is what has made me develop crushes, every time.

 

And @thejigsup... my loved one is both a midget and broke

[Carnatic]

It's pretty much the same anywhere you go with a few local peculiarities, things considered important in one culture but irrelevant in another, or attractive in one culture but unattractive in another, though Poland, Russia and Ireland aren't going be that different to the US.

 

Not everyone in the US is so shallow either. If you're having difficulty you should ask yourself if you really have enough evidence to suggest that the female population of the US is so shallow, or if lack of physical attraction is the only reason you're being rejected.

[iwishiknew]

As a foreign girl myself...

 

I can tell you that, no, I do not care about a guy's height or how rich he is, or (except only passingly) his looks...personality is what has made me develop crushes, every time.

 

And @thejigsup... my loved one is both a midget and broke

 

I wish there were more girls like you that don't care about height

[Batya33]

Someone who isn't selective about physical attraction is just being foolish when it comes to dating. The issue is generalizing about a whole country of women as "picky and shallow" - that's what is going to hamper your efforts to date, not your height.

[iwishiknew]

Someone who isn't selective about physical attraction is just being foolish when it comes to dating. The issue is generalizing about a whole country of women as "picky and shallow" - that's what is going to hamper your efforts to date, not your height.

 

Your wrong about that. My height does play a factor of my chances of dating. Height is an important feature for A LOT of girls. Don't get me wrong there are girls out there that do like short guys but that is a very small pool of them. I'm only 5'2, who is nice, caring, outgoing, fun loving and active. I do have confidence! I can talk to any girl with ease about anything. I have been turn down all the time because of my height and my other bodily features I was born with.

 

Just recently before new yrs eve I asked my friends sister in law out. I have always liked her and she likes sports, cars, working out, being active, and shares the same interests as me. I was seeing if she would like to go out on new yrs eve and she said "no sorry I'm very busy and I got plans" ok so how about next week, would you like to go to BWW to watch the Hawks game? and she says "sorry I'm sooo busy and it just wouldn't work out between us. I was like why not? We both share similar interests and she was complete honest and told me upfront "you are just to small for me" lol, I'm like really? You kidding? She is not big at all, she is about 5'4-5'5. And a few days later my friend told me she said "I look like a tiny little boy". lol, No big deal at all, I'm use to this and this isn't the first time this happened to me.

[Batya33]

Your wrong about that. My height does play a factor of my chances of dating. Height is an important feature for A LOT of girls. Don't get me wrong there are girls out there that do like short guys but that is a very small pool of them. I'm only 5'2, who is nice, caring, outgoing, fun loving and active. I do have confidence! I can talk to any girl with ease about anything. I have been turn down all the time because of my height and my other bodily features I was born with.

 

Just recently before new yrs eve I asked my friends sister in law out. I have always liked her and she likes sports, cars, working out, being active, and shares the same interests as me. I was seeing if she would like to go out on new yrs eve and she said "no sorry I'm very busy and I got plans" ok so how about next week, would you like to go to BWW to watch the Hawks game? and she says "sorry I'm sooo busy and it just wouldn't work out between us. I was like why not? We both share similar interests and she was complete honest and told me upfront "you are just to small for me" lol, I'm like really? You kidding? She is not big at all, she is about 5'4-5'5. And a few days later my friend told me she said "I look like a tiny little boy". lol, No big deal at all, I'm use to this and this isn't the first time this happened to me.

 

I never wrote that height was not an issue. It is. IMO your attitude as expressed in your first post is a much bigger issue.

 

Do you work out? My suggestion is that if you bulk up some you will appear taller -and of course make sure your posture is excellent.

[derPhilosoph]

Your wrong about that. My height does play a factor of my chances of dating. Height is an important feature for A LOT of girls. Don't get me wrong there are girls out there that do like short guys but that is a very small pool of them. I'm only 5'2, who is nice, caring, outgoing, fun loving and active. I do have confidence! I can talk to any girl with ease about anything. I have been turn down all the time because of my height and my other bodily features I was born with.

 

Just recently before new yrs eve I asked my friends sister in law out. I have always liked her and she likes sports, cars, working out, being active, and shares the same interests as me. I was seeing if she would like to go out on new yrs eve and she said "no sorry I'm very busy and I got plans" ok so how about next week, would you like to go to BWW to watch the Hawks game? and she says "sorry I'm sooo busy and it just wouldn't work out between us. I was like why not? We both share similar interests and she was complete honest and told me upfront "you are just to small for me" lol, I'm like really? You kidding? She is not big at all, she is about 5'4-5'5. And a few days later my friend told me she said "I look like a tiny little boy". lol, No big deal at all, I'm use to this and this isn't the first time this happened to me.

 

iwishiknew, I have read several of your threads and am truly sorry that you are in the situation that you're in. I too, struggle with an easily seen unattractive (and many times repulsive feature) physical condition in the form of severe acne scarring on my face... I have been single all my life and never had a GF from the time I became interested in dating (which for me was a bit later than most I guess - post college, so around 23 ish) up until now when I am few weeks from turning 30... The only dates I have been on were ones in which a close female friend in college set me up with 3 of her friends... Needless to say there wasn't much of a connection at all since there were no second dates and she even told me going in that these friends of hers were single mainly because of their personalities. I ended up seeing why this was the case! When my adult acne and subsequent scarring got worse in the past few years (due to a period of severe depression, joblessness, and more than usual alcohol drinking), women have been outright repulsed by the sight of my face... I feel bad and uncomfortable for making them feel uncomfortable!

 

As sad as they may be, the main things that keep me sane and comfortable in my life today are jerking off to porn and going to strip clubs occasionally. I still hold out hope that one day I will find a woman who will love me for me and I the same for her, but I have to plan my life such that that may never happen... The silver lining to my adult acne is that to combat it I have radically changed my diet for much of the past year and am eating healthier today than I have ever in my life! My attitude also became more positive and I truly believe that God is blessing me because I have asked for his forgiveness and continue to do so. I have been very sinful in the past and continue to be mainly due to lust! I truly can empathize with how frustrating, demoralizing, and depressing the years have been for you iwishiknew. My lack of romantic success is part of the reason (along with my general belief that the world is getting worse for the average person, but that is another discussion that I have turned back to God. My mom may be right in that all of my problems (anxiety, job struggles, etc.) that I have had post college were due to the fact that I refused to accept God's blessings! I truly want to believe that there will be a better life for myself and those who cannot really live this life to the fullest (at least according to what we see so commonly in daily life, in the media, etc.).

[dias]

Weird why people assume that dating a foreigner is easier . It's true that in some countries generally people can be more easy going .In USA i think girls are very open and easy going because Americans are generally easy going and open . In Europe people are more reserved so don't take it for granted that it's easier to find a girlfriend. If you mean mail-order bride that's another thing . Get a local escort , it will be cheaper.

[iwishiknew]

I never wrote that height was not an issue. It is. IMO your attitude as expressed in your first post is a much bigger issue.

 

Do you work out? My suggestion is that if you bulk up some you will appear taller -and of course make sure your posture is excellent.

 

 

Yes, I do workout everyday. I'm 115lbs and in great shape and very toned. I run everyday but I don't like to do heavy weight lifting but I do free weights. Its hard for a small guy like me to bulk up.

[Batya33]

Yes, I do workout everyday. I'm 115lbs and in great shape and very toned. I run everyday but I don't like to do heavy weight lifting but I do free weights. Its hard for a small guy like me to bulk up.

 

Great -how is your posture and in general how you carry yourself?

[abitbroken]

I wish there were more girls like you that don't care about height

 

I bet she didn't care about height was because the person she was attracted to (he used to work with her, etc, she got to know him and she developed respect and feelings for him) happened to be short. If she was at a disco and she didn't know him at all - maybe she wouldn't have considered him. You have to stop deciding women are so shallow and only care about height - yes, if you are trying to meet them at a nightclub perhaps, but if you establish relationships (a coworker relationship, a friendly neighbor relationship, a classmate, a teammate), eventually someone over time will fancy you or they will have a friend who will. Going running and working out - well gyms are a meat market for the most buff and the most attractive out there - but you can still meet someone through a running group or a team - but you have to stop lumping women all together under the same opinions - or treating them like marks.

 

Heck, its not your height, its your atitude. Look at all the race horse jockeys with tall, ex-college-cheerleader- or ex-model-type wives.

 

I really suggest you volunteer or take a class or otherwise to expand your social circle. Have you tried speed dating? Even if you don't meet a match in 10 tries, there might be someone on the 11th.

[Batya33]

"I bet she didn't care about height was because the person she was attracted to (he used to work with her, etc, she got to know him and she developed respect and feelings for him) happened to be short. If she was at a disco and she didn't know him at all - maybe she wouldn't have considered him."

 

Or maybe she didn't care because (like me) she prefers men who are shorter than average or simply doesn't care what height a man is -has no effect on her physical attraction. I just wouldn't assume that height is an impediment so that a shorter man has to wow someone with his personality.

 

I do agree that places that are focused on checking people out physically and are not conducive to one on one conversations are typically not the best places to find a long term relationship. So, sure, if someone values someone who looks objectively like a model or has a very specific type in mind (both of which are often more related to arm candy/trophy desires rather than a desire for chemistry/attraction) then going to a visually-focused place would be the way to go.

[Beccy]

I bet she didn't care about height was because the person she was attracted to (he used to work with her, etc, she got to know him and she developed respect and feelings for him) happened to be short. If she was at a disco and she didn't know him at all - maybe she wouldn't have considered him.

Actually, I prefer shorter guys...they're within easy hugging range lol. But height isn't really a factor for me. And I don't go to discos...nor does he lol

 

Or maybe she didn't care because (like me) she prefers men who are shorter than average or simply doesn't care what height a man is -has no effect on her physical attraction. I just wouldn't assume that height is an impediment so that a shorter man has to wow someone with his personality.

This!

 

Although really, in order for me to really fall for someone, they have to wow me with their personality, regardless of physical attraction or lack thereof. I find that comes later if a guy is really nice and not just putting up an act.

[LoveSoDeep]

OP I'm sorry this is getting you down but not everyone can have the same preferences. There are girls out there who don't care about height at all and there are girls that do. There are guys out there who don't care about breast size, or weight or height or who knows what other trait could be added here... and there are guys that do.

 

I'm short. I'm 5'1 (probably actually less but I round up because 5' .5" sounds silly) and I'm sure there are guys who won't give me a second look because they aren't into short women. You can't win them all and you can't change your height. All you can do is be yourself and keep looking for the girl who likes you for you....and trust me that will be easier if you're 100% happy with who you are (and being bitter about being short isn't 100% happy with yourself).

[iwishiknew]

Great -how is your posture and in general how you carry yourself?

 

I carry myself well, no problems at all talking to girls and carrying out a conversation. Due to my bone disorder, my posture looks like a mid-size dwarf because of my arms and legs being bowed.