Online dating pet peeves

[LoveSoDeep]

If we want a laugh how about some funnies straight from the inbox?

 

Got this yesterday.

 

"YOU ARE PRETTY AND LOVE YOUR PROFILE...PLEASE TEXT IF YOU WANT...MY PHONE MESSED UP AND ONLY LETS ME SEND EMAILS NOT RECEIVE THEM. SO IF YOU EMAIL I WONT GET IT LMAO...TY FOR YOUR TIME...HOPE TO HEAR FROM YOU SOON"

 

Follwed by a phone number and name.

 

So did your caps lock break too? Seriously does this EVER work? LOL

[Mb1212]

If we want a laugh how about some funnies straight from the inbox?

 

Got this yesterday.

 

"YOU ARE PRETTY AND LOVE YOUR PROFILE...PLEASE TEXT IF YOU WANT...MY PHONE MESSED UP AND ONLY LETS ME SEND EMAILS NOT RECEIVE THEM. SO IF YOU EMAIL I WONT GET IT LMAO...TY FOR YOUR TIME...HOPE TO HEAR FROM YOU SOON"

 

Follwed by a phone number and name.

 

So did your caps lock break too? Seriously does this EVER work? LOL

 

Hahahaha!!!!

[Mb1212]

Homemade machines? Eek!

 

Yes homemade... Hahah! I just imagined this guy living in his moms basement with all these weird sex machines made out of wood and duct tape. Lol so creepy

[LoveSoDeep]

Yes homemade... Hahah! I just imagined this guy living in his moms basement with all these weird sex machines made out of wood and duct tape. Lol so creepy

 

And this is why online dating sites all have a block feature. HAHA!

[Mb1212]

Okay guys now Im restoring my okcupid account so I can dig up some hilarious messages. This thread is awesome haha

[Mb1212]

Okay does this work for anyone? Because I got two messages just like this.

 

 

"After a rigorously brief overview of your profile, I wanted to let you know I have already married and divorced you in my mind. Thanks for all the wonderful imaginary memories... you will always have a special place in my heart.

 

your ex-hubby,

Boyd "

 

 

And then this is another guy who I didn't reply to after like ten freaking minutes lol.

 

"Ok, so you can't be bothered to write a reply to a polite question?

 

(20 minutes later)

Just so you know not every message you might get is someone trying to hit on you. Also, eugenics is considered to be one of the major ethical mistakes of the 20th century, and was discredited during the course of the wider civil rights movement."

 

 

Lol this is why I gave up after a few days.

[Jennifer89]

Okay does this work for anyone? Because I got two messages just like this.

 

 

"After a rigorously brief overview of your profile, I wanted to let you know I have already married and divorced you in my mind. Thanks for all the wonderful imaginary memories... you will always have a special place in my heart.

 

your ex-hubby,

Boyd "

 

 

And then this is another guy who I didn't reply to after like ten freaking minutes lol.

 

"Ok, so you can't be bothered to write a reply to a polite question?

 

(20 minutes later)

Just so you know not every message you might get is someone trying to hit on you. Also, eugenics is considered to be one of the major ethical mistakes of the 20th century, and was discredited during the course of the wider civil rights movement."

 

 

Lol this is why I gave up after a few days.

 

That first one is great, thanks for the relationship, but we're over!

 

And ya, that 2nd guy is the needy one, haha!

[LoveSoDeep]

Yep OKC is not so great in my area.

 

Real OKC messages:

 

"I your you cute girl next look"

 

Uh, what? Is that(or was that supposed to be) English?

 

"I'm working in four days a week for the foreseeable future. I'm trying to meet people because I don't really know anyone. I'm actually a pretty interesting guy."

 

and?

 

"hello beautiful,can i know you more?"

 

No pic and almost empty profile.....yeah....next!

[Me82]

Haha gosh. I can't help but laugh.

Yeah I had some weird messages too! I think they are either making fun of us, or they are completely weirdos!

[Me82]

That's a good one!!! Hahaha

[greta96]

"Read your profile n I'm somewhat interested, care to chat?" - whoa buddy, try to contain your excitement, lol

[Throwaway999]

This thread almost makes me want to try online dating again, because I can actually string a coherent sentence together. Apparently, that puts me in the top percentile.

[ForeverYoung]

I am not upset with anything.

 

I am making a point that yes, you've got my point, the majority of women dating online are losers too. They feed the existence of the various male personas debated on this thread. The reply from that poster who perceived me as bitter just reinforced that. She enjoys the interaction.

 

So I see that you and some other people instead of debating an idea start a personal issue with me. "be the great catch you know you are...". Why you just don't stick to the topic instead of trying to say I am bragging about myself?

[LoveSoDeep]

This thread almost makes me want to try online dating again, because I can actually string a coherent sentence together. Apparently, that puts me in the top percentile.

 

Well it puts you above a good number of guys. Sadly though if you aren't. My type at all perfect grammar won't get you a date. It does help though.

[LoveSoDeep]

I am not upset with anything.

 

I am making a point that yes, you've got my point, the majority of women dating online are losers too. They feed the existence of the various male personas debated on this thread. The reply from that poster who perceived me as bitter just reinforced that. She enjoys the interaction.

 

So I see that you and some other people instead of debating an idea start a personal issue with me. "be the great catch you know you are...". Why you just don't stick to the topic instead of trying to say I am bragging about myself?

 

I did not say you were bragging. I assume you are a good catch as I have no reason to assume otherwise. My point was you need confidence in yourself to be successful at dating. Also none of my post was directed soley at you. It was a general statement.

 

Back to the fun now, please.

[ForeverYoung]

I see. right. Have a nice day.

 

I did not say you were bragging. I assume you are a good catch as I have no reason to assume otherwise. My point was you need confidence in yourself to be successful at dating. Also none of my post was directed soley at you. It was a general statement.

 

Back to the fun now, please.

[Realitynut]

Hazelwood, I just went back through my profile to see if I failed any of those! I do have small dogs, but I swear, I do not carry them in purses!

 

HAHAHAAHAHA. I have a Chihuahua....and inherited a big pink bag/purse for her. Poor thing. I only use it to sneak her into hotels! Just throw a beach towel over it! lol

 

Lots of guys in Car pics too. But MUCH worse is guys holding the dammmmmm stinkin' fish! ugh (or the hanging dead deer with blood still dripping from his body onto the garage floor! TRUE. A real turn on!)

[ForeverYoung]

For this one, I could characterize this female persona as The Poor Communication gal. Once again just to give you a potential different perspective and show this is not as absurd as you think and maybe to your surprise, you may have partial blame on this behavior.

 

When one is talking there is expectation you start and end a conversation. If a woman walks away (to do real things in a life or because one is busy handling multiple chats from lot of other men) the other person (the man) naturally wants to see if you are there, if the system crashed, if you died, etc. For many intelligent man, it is initially hard to believe an adult can be so rude and uneducated just to walk away in the middle of a conversation.

 

So if one walks away or handle multiple sessions from multiple men and do not give a proper closure, in the initial few minutes, it is natural for a human being to submit an inquiry and see if you are still there. I am not sure about your profession and if you use chat for collaboration at work. People are supposed to demonstrate a certain etiquette and properly terminate conversations, like you normally would on a face to face scenario. Often it has nothing to do with being needy in this case. I can imagine some men may be "needy" that is true. I can guarantee you my perspective is also very valid and often though.

 

This could go back to the type of behavior I have observed:

Many women can't handle the "fame" given by the high volume of inquiries. It is a supply and demand fact. They become so arrogant with several messages in the inbox that they think they do not have to demonstrate basic communication etiquette anymore. Sad.

 

 

 

 

 

 

So this is just to give you

The needy guy- This guy will message you, and you won't even see it because your on ENA with POF running in the background, and then all of the sudden 3 minutes later you are getting another message from him "Hello? You there?" and if (god forbid) you don't see that message either, you get another message 2 minutes later saying "Hey, where are you?"

 

Alternatively, you are not signed into POF at all, you are busy, you know, out in the real world with real people, and because you don't respond to his message right away, you come home to 5 new messages from him.

[ForeverYoung]

For this one, I could characterize this female persona as The Poor Communication gal. Once again just to give you a potential different perspective and show this is not as absurd as you think and to surprise you, you may have partial blame on this.

 

When one is talking there is expectation you start and end a conversation. If a woman walks away (to do real things in a life or because one is busy handling multiple chats from lot of other men) the other person (the man) naturally wants to see if you are there, if the system crashed, if you died, etc. For many intelligent man, it is initially hard to believe an adult can be so rude and uneducated just to walk away in the middle of a conversation.

 

So if one walks away or handle multiple sessions from multiple men and do not give a proper closure, in the initial few minutes, it is natural for a human being to submit an inquiry and see if you are still there. I am not sure about your profession and if you use chat for collaboration at work. People are supposed to demonstrate a certain etiquette and properly terminate conversations, like you normally would on a face to face scenario. Often it has nothing to do with being needy in this case. I can imagine some men may be "needy" that is true. I can guarantee you my perspective is also very valid and often though.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

So this is just to give you

The needy guy- This guy will message you, and you won't even see it because your on ENA with POF running in the background, and then all of the sudden 3 minutes later you are getting another message from him "Hello? You there?" and if (god forbid) you don't see that message either, you get another message 2 minutes later saying "Hey, where are you?"

 

Alternatively, you are not signed into POF at all, you are busy, you know, out in the real world with real people, and because you don't respond to his message right away, you come home to 5 new messages from him.

[Realitynut]

Geez...is that why it takes so long for someone to 'email' me back while we are sending messages to each other? I only talk to one guy at a time. Once i was doing that to TWO guys....and boy was i busy! lol Then i thought...is that what the guys are doing to me....??? ugh

 

But when you are talking (messaging/emailing) for awhile and then they drop off the face of the earth....and you are waiting for a reply. Sheesh! I have told guys, the least you could do is say, 'G'night i'm leaving now'......or at least say goodbye, talk later. I have told them it's like hanging up the phone on you! You are having a convo...and suddenly it's one sided!!!

 

So please let the person you are messaging that you are leaving the conversation. I don't mean the 1 or 2 txt a day guy either...i mean the one where you are chatting for at least a half hour. I've had them already say....'sorry, i feel asleep'.lol

 

The problem is, I'm typing merrily away on my big ole' keyboard...and they're txting away on their itty-bitty phones. UGH! again.

[hodgeheg]

it is initially hard to believe an adult can be so rude and uneducated just to walk away in the middle of a conversation.

 

Um... It's messaging... Online... It is not a real life, face to face conversation. If someone doesn't message me back then I'm obviously not what they're looking for. I don't take it personally or judge them for it and I move on.

 

Anywayyyyy, The friend's ex. I can't believe he even messaged me! He didn't mention her though so maybe he just didn't realise we were friends. It also states on his profile that he doesn't have children when I know for a fact that he does! And an ex-wife (he's 23 so that's not that normal). His profile makes him look pretty normal/attractive when I know that he's a serial cheater and liar. This worries me when looking at other prospects!

[quirky]

Hazlewood, man..your post was hilarious !!

 

In my profile I say I haven't travelled at all (I live abroad and I just go back home when I have money/time), I am not super independent and mega busy, all that flactuates for me just like life does.. I also say I am not for the 'faint hearted' so enough there to put a few people off. But everyone has wanted to see me again !!

 

Anyway, I am probaby a bit guilty of the curvy bit. I am not fat but have a bit extra and my male friend said don't put 'a bit extra' because noone will contact you, put curvy. He says I don't look as much as I weigh because it is all distributed evenly. I have a pic of me with a bathing suit though from 2 months ago so the guy can decide from that.

 

Also here's a message I got

 

" Hey, How are you? im _ and im a 21 year old student ...now for the awkwardly blunt part where i have to worn you that i do crossdress privately ( thought i should mention it incase it puts you off) but if it doesnt then i'd love to chat sometime be it as friends or more xxx '

 

and another

 

'You look lovely, I'd like to meet a woman to adore, to kiss your feet and shoes, to cook for you, to travel and share life. I'd love to have you walk all over me. '

[Jennifer89]

HAHAHAAHAHA. I have a Chihuahua....and inherited a big pink bag/purse for her. Poor thing. I only use it to sneak her into hotels! Just throw a beach towel over it! lol

 

Lots of guys in Car pics too. But MUCH worse is guys holding the dammmmmm stinkin' fish! ugh (or the hanging dead deer with blood still dripping from his body onto the garage floor! TRUE. A real turn on!)

 

LOL! I'm a vegetarian in the south, I see these all the time!

[Jennifer89]

Your ex boyfriend- Yup, this is your very own ex boyfriends online dating profile! And not only do you see the lies in it ("I am ready to settle down" when they told you they felt like the 13 people that had f*cked wasn't enough) and the funny things in it (I'm a gamer looking for a hot gamer girlfriend") but you also get a message... from them. Awkward!

[quirky]

Your ex boyfriend- Yup, this is your very own ex boyfriends online dating profile! And not only do you see the lies in it ("I am ready to settle down" when they told you they felt like the 13 people that had f*cked wasn't enough) and the funny things in it (I'm a gamer looking for a hot gamer girlfriend") but you also get a message... from them. Awkward!

 

Has this actually happened..? o_O