Post here instead of contacting your ex!

[Pixie_S]

One year on and i still miss you. Today nine years ago was when we first kissed.... i've been thinking of you all day.

Miss you so much... I'd love a hug right now.image removed

[Scotty123]

Today was the first day in ages I've cried over you. I don't know why, but I can't stop thinking about the last day we met. I keep going over the things you said, the way you looked. You said some really hurtful things that day. I'm still angry at you. Why .... why on earth did you not tell me how you were feeling before you ended our relationship ?? Did you not have any idea how much I loved you, how much I thought of you, how much I cared about you .... I would have done anything for you ! But you didn't give me that chance. You just ended it. I love you so much but I hate you for the way you behaved.

 

How was I supposed to know what you were thinking ? You were very good at hiding it that's for sure. We talked so much for hours and hours so why didn't you tell me ??? Did I mean so little to you ? Did I mean nothing to you ? Was it just that you couldn't be bothered ? I don't think it was that but I just don't know.

 

You said you didn't mean to end it ... well why did you ? And what on earth was all this stuff about maybe sometime in the future ? Did you say it just to make you feel better ? I thought you were a better person than that ... I never thought you would come out with rubbish like that. Did you think I would just wait about on the end of a string ? Well no, not happening !

 

I'm so glad I don't have your number in my phone cause today I was so close to contacting you. I just miss you so much.

 

But I know that any time I spend thinking about you is a waste of my time and my life. Over the last four mths I have given you so much of my time and cried so many tears over you. You were the best, most honourable person I have ever been with, but hey hoo, it's over and I know there is no way back. I wish I knew what was going through our head, but I guess it doesn't matter. For all I know your as happy as anything, getting on with your life and not looking back at all.

 

I know one day I will get over you, I just wish I knew when it would be. I've been doing great but I'm just not today.

 

Will you remember my birthday ? Hmm or do you even care ? Probably not !

[bart]

Why did I do that.

[woodc5]

Yesterday you texted me a simple text: "Do you think about me?" Now, I know that was a BS text, but I sure as hell do.. I think about you every day. I think about you a lot. I really miss you in fact. I feel bad that I ignored that text, but let's be honest.. It would have done more harm than good. I miss you.

[oasisrob22]

Why did you text me today asking if I've heard the new Taylor Swift song ("Mine")? Of course I have, you know I'm a big T-Swift fan. And now I can't stop playing the song. Why did you ask if I got your tweet at me? You know I'm not following you. And I told you that. And you respond "Ahh ok." And I don't respond. We keep playing this sad game. It sucks so bad. I love you so much, and listening to "Mine" over and over isn't helping one bit.

 

I'm going to my second counseling appointment tomorrow morning. I can't wait to get some advice on what I should do about you.

 

Sometimes I just want to text you and say "I'm sorry I f-ed everything up." What good would that do?

 

Time will tell, sweetheart. Until then...

[Mttens]

Felt pretty good in the last 10 days. I`ve been also very busy, but you still managed to cross my mind today for more than I wanted. No loving or missing you thoughts, just feeling sick thinking of the way you treated me, from the beginning to the end. Also feeling weird regarding all my crying, begging and pleading to you while you were trashing everything. Every word you said during our break up was and still is like a knife thrown at me and to think at that time I`ve lost all self respect in matter of seconds gives me the chills. Lots of people still asking me about you. I tell them we`re not together anymore and they all say you`re a looser. I wont argue that. I was actually surprised to see those people appreciating me, after all those years of not feeling good enough around you. Feels nice. Also feels nice to see people who were not even that close to me being concerned about me. The more of them I see, the more I think of you as a robot.

 

The last 3 and 1/2 months have really been an experience for me. While I may regret how things ended and how 12 years of my life were wasted, on the other hand I dont regret it. I feel much stronger now. Some weeks ago I had no will to live, but now things are totally different. Few days ago I was at your house, not the thing that I wanted to do, but, well, had to talk in person with your brother about some stuff. Guess I also took it as a test for myself. We stayed in your room and I felt nothing. Nothing at all. Just a bit annoyed that your mother was surprised that I look good and appear to also feel good. Surprising not everyone in your family can hide their feelings as you do.

I`ll be fine in time. I already am. I have absolutely no desire to see or speak to you ever again. Or to hear what you`ve been up to. I now care only about myself, you`re not my priority anymore. You`re just my ex bf who messed up royally.

Guess whose time is now to say "I wont be with you, even if we two were the last people breathing on this earth"?

[Yodabell]

This morning I woke up thinking about you and missing you. Probably because it's Friday and on Fridays I would have been looking forward to you driving up here in the evening. I know I'm going to be ok, and I know I'll get through this - it just hurts so much at the moment.

[scotsguy]

Well well well, now you're hurting. What goes around comes around. In one sense its good to know that you're having a hard time of it, but I'm starting to think I'm better off out of it. You can't handle being alone. If you ever leave a relationship without having the next one lined up I'll be very surprised. Thank you for validating everything I went through. Unless you mature significantly, I would be quite happy never interacting with you again. Now leave me alone.

[Ajitjade]

Its really hard after betrayal ...i am feeling that since last 8 months ... I came far from my country still the way my ex-gf betrayed with me and married other guy after 2 years of relationship is very weired.... i creid alone called her regularly 100 calls which she wouldn answer is the weired thing... how the bloody these gal's will change the mind giving false assurances like a hell ... all in my mind is fuelling like anything ... this forum had helped me NC concept which im having since 2 weeks hope i carryout for another 8 weeks...

[everybodyknows]

I've been a complete insomniac lately. I think of you when I'm alone, and that's usually only at night because I try to stay REALLY busy. I watched Glee today. When she turned to him and said "Just do it now. Just break up with me," I just couldn't control myself. Even though I haven't cried over you in weeks, for a few seconds I let my tears fall and I let myself feel all the pain and hurt that is still inside of me. Cheesy, I know. But man, some sort of emotional trigger, huh? I just remembered the crushed hope, the painful desperation of those first few weeks. It was really terrible for me.

 

I still hope that S will text me to "hang out". He was a good distraction for when it was really bad. I used to think I was using him, and I felt bad, but now I see him for who he is and what it was. I still like him though, and if he were to text me this weekend, I wouldn't be opposed to hanging out. I'm finally sleepy, i want to say its all of the physical exertion from working out, but as soon as I put these words onto the screen and out of my head, I finally feel drained and my mind isn't all the way, but a little more at ease.

[Snowy]

Wow, it actually feels good to just cry it all out once in a while, especially while playing the piano.

[bebs87]

I have an exam today.. You said you were gonna call me last night as I was freaking out with my exam, you know I calm down when I talk to you... It's not that I'm begging or so, I just wanted to calm down, I was waiting for your call, but yeah.... You didn't... I was shaking from anxiety and I was crying... But what can I do? Maybe you don't care that much anymore about me... I guess I shouldn't be trying to get support from you, sorry... I just didn't know who else I could go to...

 

Btw, ya ochen tebya lublu... Still...

 

My heart is still beating... And aching...

[Starrgrl]

Babe..

 

 

You're still in my heart.

I still love you like crazy.. I don't think my feelings will ever truly fade.

 

Do you think about me at all? I cried hard last night for you. I miss you hun.

[iBroken]

One of the last things I told you in my desperate pleas after you left me was a Promise that I would never love anyone as much as I ever loved you. Im sorry, but I need to take that back.

 

Looking back on this relationship, you cannot be "the one". You are not deserving of having the most of my love. All the cheating, the lying, the deceit, the selfishness, the backstabbing. Why wouldnt I love someone as much as I loved you? When we started to get back together in the winter, you asked me what my gut said about you and I. I told you my gut says you will do this to me again. And you did.

 

If I loved you that much despite all of the above, I can only imagine how good it will be when I meet someone who doesnt do what you have done to me.

 

Im letting you go - and it feels good.

 

Last night, I had this feeling that you and the new guy are through. It was that "feeling" I had whenever I tuned in with you. But then I got to thinking - maybe its not that you are no longer with him and Im still in tune....maybe its because Im letting go that Im disconnecting from you.

 

You. I love you - I always have and I always will. I cherish the times we spent together. I cherish the memories. But those days are over and Im slowly but surely moving on. I hope one day, we can come back together and shoot the ish....with no attachments. It took my e/x fiancee and I 7 years to talk about our break up lol. But we were together just as long. So maybe in 4 years time, we can have that chat.

 

I do love you and I certainly miss you. I miss your soft skin, your hair, your smile and your laugh. And I miss the little man. Id love for him to meet gizmo. But now is not the time.

 

Anyways, I hope this message somehow finds you. I hope you are doing well.

 

Love you

xoxoxo

[J-L-T]

Man, I miss you so much. I love you. I'm really hurting right now.

[bebs87]

Hello I,

 

I cried again today... I was hyperventilating from anxiety, I am sure I failed that exam today... I wished you called me last night to calm me down so I could study. I kind of hoped that you will text me good luck, but you didnt. At around lunch time, I was surprised, you texted! Your phone died so you were not able to call and asked me how the exam went. Well, of course, I replied... just straight to the point not cute or sugar coated reply.. I thought you were going to reply, well, you did, after 7 hours.. its okay, at least you found time to reply.. and again, i replied back, then end of text conversation. I really miss you, I know you just want me to move on and maybe meet some other guys... but I'm telling you, I won't be dating anyone... I dont think someone would ask me anyway, so yeah... I promised to myself to graduate college first, yeah 1 semester more, though it looks like i might be repeating this semester because of whats happening to me.

 

I am on my darkest days recently, after you broke up with me, I had some issues with college that I am now facing... I hope you were here right now at my dark days, I know you are there, but it's still different, you know? If you are with me as my man, I know it would be better, it could have been better as you were my inspiration and my motivation why I'm finishing this nursing program that I really despise, I don't want to be a nurse!!! gosh... but you motivated me to finish it since I am a senior already and yeah, your mom adores me cause I'm going to be a nurse... but now, there is nothing in me that makes me happy... no more love from you, and no more reason why im continuing to be a nurse. well, maybe for myself it could be a good thing... but I am NOT happy about it, not excited...

 

You said you are not closing your mind about the possibility that in the future maybe a couple of years from now we will both know what we really want and we will be back together... that shed some light into me... you said maybe by then, if we are back together, you are sure we will live the rest of our lives together... hay... makes me smile to think about it, but its too early to daydream that one day, we will be back together.

 

I miss you terribly... I need you right now...

 

I love you still... may man.

[Bheart]

After 5 years of being together. He broke up with me 2 months ago. It's funny because I was begging and pleading to never let me go. I suffered thru all the pain of what he put me through. I went NO CONTACT on him. He finally came back at exactly 2 months and told me "I want you back, I cannot live without you" only to change his mind 24 hours later and say "It's better if we leave everything as it is". I now realized that I no longer am in love with a man who doesn't see me as his priority but only his option. I am scared of him now. I have nightmares of HIM. He didn't have to treat me so bad after the breakup, maybe I would of had a lot more respect for him.

 

It's funny b/c all he could say is he felt bad for breaking up with me, that I am the most perfect girl he has ever been with. Telling me I deserve a medal for the kind of girl I am. Perfect marriage material.

 

BUT dumped me, not once, but twice. I miss who he was. I don't hate him, but I will pray for him. His loss. Fool me once, shame on him, fool me twice, shame on me!

 

Still can't believe its been 2 months though. Sucks because I want to say I love him, but I don't anymore. I want to say I want him back, but I don't know anymore. He hurt me so bad that I question if I want him in my life again. He's gone now. maybe for Good.

 

And for some reason... but something is telling me that I don't want him back anymore

[Bheart]

Ok, I had to post again.

 

I went shopping today and couldn't help but to think of HIM. All the things I would of thought he would look so cute in. But realized that this man had me on a string. Not sure if he intentionally meant it or was unaware.. but yep.. he hurt me pretty bad. I'm not going to lie, I do miss the guy he was. but b/c he screwed me over twice, it is why I cannot love him. I am scared of him.

 

It's friday night and I am all alone sitting in my bedroom. Thinking of him. *sigh* , I still miss our bond. I am very curious if he is out right now possibly with a new girl. I wonder what she looks like thats IF he met someone new yet? 2 months seems so short, but really its been a long time now. Sorta makes me sad, but also makes me happy. Happy to know that if u could find someone new, that I damn well can find me a new guy too.

 

But I am scared my feelings will resurface after all the pain he put me thru when I meet a new guy. I am worried that I will start missing my ex when I am around the new guy.

 

I wish I could be watching a movie with someone right now

[Anna.]

Why can't I listen to the radio without thinking about you? You make me mad. I will always love you, and I have to see your face every day when I look at hers, but we didnt belong together. The whole thing never felt legit. But looking at your face in pictures is like looking at mine. You were mine, no matter how illegimate the relationship felt. You loved me I know, and I know you still struggle with the fact that we didn't work out, too.

 

BUT we didn't. And it's over. Thank God for that. You had the courage to leave when I didn't, even if I still hate you for it, I know in a couple of years I'll genuinely thank you for that....I hope.

 

Now to the point: Do you think that since we have custody and child support worked out, you could follow directions and quit disappearing on me? Dude, nobody's chasing you anymore. I'm not showing up where you're at. I'm not waiting around to cuss you or fight or whatever. I am, however, pissed off that you seem to lack the decency to atleast keep abreast of said custody arrangement. You are not a bad father. But you are an alchoholic. And you're the best alchoholic dad you can be, but guess what? That is still not ok! Every moment you arent at work or with our daughter, you are drinking. Depressed much, dude? I know, I lived through it for years.

 

But it's just not my problem anymore and I am honestly going to need you to get it together without me forcing you too. I know...let the shock set in.......The fact is, it's just not my job. Everybody agrees I went above and beyond the call of duty as a mother to make sure my daughter had a half decent daddy. And you turned it around on me. you did. Now I'm going to be honest, THAT still hurts. I sunk low to bring you up. I was at the skeevy houses at 3 in the morning, 6 months pregnant, dragging your sorry behind home. I supported us when you couldn't. Then you rose above it. You quit the drugs, you got a decent job and suddenly...you're better than me? No, sir. You are 100 times better than the man I ran to when I was hurting 3 1/2 years ago, but you're still not there.

 

And neither am I, but you can't be that guy that waits...even if I was that girl that did. I wouldn't have left you and that's what hurts the most. I would have taken you back time after time after time until the day we died. I would have married you and had 5 more kids and been miserable until one of us quit breathing. That, I know. I would have. And it doesn't mean I loved you more b/c I honestly don't think I did. I think we loved each other equally. And it was a lot of love, I know. But for whatever reason, you could stand walking away when I couldn't. You could bear that pain when I truly thought it was unbearable.

 

Maybe it's because I had to deal with her questions and you didn't. But you had to deal with her absense, which is exponentially worse. I guess it boils down to the questions I still have: even if it was the right decision to make, how come I couldn't make it and you could?? Why can't you look at her and know that you drinking hurts her? And finally, why in God's name can't you answer the damn phone when you know without a doubt all I want to know is when you're picking her up? Seriously dude, I just need a time and place; you unprepared, immature, self-absorbed, obnoxious, arrogant, stubborn, good-looking, smart, funny, lovable and hatable SOB.

[Morning]

I am trying to turn myself into someone you would like to get together with. Thanks for giving me the opportunity.

[Cheetarah]

You're probably the only one I am soft towards in my mind, right now. With everything that's gone on, I've tried not to keep my distance from people, but I'm doing it anyway. Trust issues are on, full force.

 

I'm not sure how to fully let you go. I did all the right things...It's been too long already. And it's all so fresh and vivid in my mind. When I'm really down and out, I think about the good times you and I had. It makes me smile and unknits my eyebrows...Proof I'm not totally shut off, I guess. I've never in my life, opened up to anyone the way I did to you. Not before and not since. I'm not certain why you thought I was closed-off...

 

Even though I don't trust one part of you, I'd still lay my life in your hands if it came down to that. And I would fully trust you with it. I must sound crazy for that, believe me, I think it's crazy too. I can't trust you not to shut down and run from intimacy, but I would trust you with my life.

 

You were the closest thing I ever found to what I was searching for...Even all the irrational crap. It was bad, and I knew that but...guilty pleasures. We both fit the dysfunctional puzzle pieces...Damn, why do we have to be so screwed up? Would I still think of you to this day if it wasn't that way? Or would you just quietly fade away, in the back of my mind still like the rest, tucked away in a special spot...Jesus, you take up half the head space, and you're not even paying rent. I wish I could evict you out of there.

[blargh2000]

* * * * ing hurting you * * * * * .

[lama]

why did you tell me we would be friends forever, then cut me off like a switch.

I didn't think you and I could ever be "friends" but when I gave in I depended on you. It made me trust you that even after all we had been though you still wanted me in your life, somehow.

you get to move on, with her..and I have no idea what the truth really was or how long you and she were really going on..Im sure its strong, you have known her for years, and it grew into a relationship..I know you let her ride the bike I sent your daughter..I try not to let that kick my a$$ too much but Iam waking up with an underlying current of hurt I just try to ignore.

as much as I have going on in my life, this makes me cry everyday..

you might have known it was over, but emailing me and texting me everyday I did not know..you were faking me out? weird. I think thats weird. Id like to be given a sane reason, why you cannot give that reason makes no sense.

you didn't want me to ever tell you about me dating..and told me you had a bad dream about it, but bring her here and rub it in my face, at an event I'd planned for all summer and could not avoid? you know you hurt me.

you did hurt me.

I dont want you back, but I miss you. you were a part of me.

[blargh2000]

i kinda miss you but also remember the bs i had to put up with and im happy i dont have that bs right now

[Shawnee77]

I waited for you for over a year I made sure you were taken care of. I got cold feet have you never been confused or scared? Or maybe that is what is happening to you now. How can you tell me a few weeks ago you love me, then say we are on hold but you still care and now just ignore me like I mean nothing to you. You said so yourself you cant make your feelings go away overnight. I made a mistake, prolly the biggest mistake of my life. What happened to unconditional love? All I want is answers. If there is someone else tell me I can take it. You act like everything is fine when we talk on the fone yet you ignorre my texts. Do you even know what you want? Are you still planning on moving down here, what does on hold mean? You would think you would just tell me what the hell is going on im tired of sounding like a crazy person. Grrrr