THE NO CONTACT CHALLENGE, Part 2

[ZenZenny]

Day 23

 

NC still going well. I'm glad that I decided to not text or reach out to her. Yesterday she re-tweeted something that I posted. I know it doesn't mean anything but that tells me that she is or has been looking at things I post to a certain extent for whatever reason. I first it felt like a big deal to me and then with time I stopped thinking about it as much and stopped caring that it even happened.

[BringinMahoney]

Relapse.......

 

DAY 3 again.

 

Why do I give in. Well now I am at least going to set up a profile on a dating site and at least message some girls. Distract my mind. I am going and seeing and doing, but then I get exhausted from going and seeing and doing...that's when it occurs when I am resting from the busy - ness..

[pfbsurf]

Day 7 official NC. 26 since BU.

 

I find myself in a severely depressed state. I cannot stop thinking about her - the texts to that guy, her being with him. I only asked her to be honest with me and she couldnt do that.

 

I'm not going to do anything rash but life does seem to be cruel and meaningless.

 

I hope i can get a good nights sleep.

[the dude91]

Day 2

 

For some reason I forgot to post yesterday, oh well. Anyways its been a tough couple of days mostly due to work. I mean, really tough and my body is aching. But I'm still feeling pretty good even after that break in NC, I feel pretty at peace although things with the girl I was taking things slow with wasn't going to work out, I guess I'm still not ready for a relationship because there were some things about her that I couldn't get passed and kept comparing her to my ex in my mind. I figured it wasn't fair nor the right time for the girl so decided to stay friends for now until I've moved on a little bit more. I'm feeling like I'm already pretty close to being moved on though, it's just little things that serve of reminders of memories. I think I'm missing the memories more than I miss the ex now.

[BringinMahoney]

DAY 4

 

Better, but still those nagging thoughts of all the "good times" and intimacy. Why can't we think of the bad times or the terrible wa7y they broke up with us? Anyone know why that is. I mean c'mon.

[ezra]

day 2

 

I feel in control of myself. I can't stop thinking of him, he's the first thing that comes up in my mind when I wake up. I find it so hard and so unfair that I'm suffering so much while he's having such a good time. I hate what a sarcastic, cynical he is. I really hope I can move on.

[t1lersm0m1]

I decided posting daily was putting too much emphasis on the break up and NC, so decided to post weekly to keep myself accountable.

 

Day 42. 6 weeks ago today we ended it for good, and that Sunday I started going to ACoA meetings. I'm on such a great path right now.

 

Two days ago I had a weak moment and really wanted to text him to tell him I'm ready to be friends if he still wanted that, but I knew it was a crock. I was hoping being friends would open the door to reconciliation. Deep down inside I DO NOT want reconciliation. I'm on a one year journey to become the best woman I can, so when I'm ready to potentially find my life partner, I'll be in the best spot possible to do so.

[3Tears]

Make sure you're getting that protein !!!

[BringinMahoney]

DAY 5

 

Speaking with other women does help. However still those times when I'm by myself those thoughts of her come back.

[Beduldac]

She left me for another man on 7 March. She was probably cheating with him at work. I quit worrying about why she did it or what I may have done wrong. Nothing she did mattered after 8 March. I wish her the best, but knowing her track record, she will probably get the worst.

 

I lost around 15 pounds to 160 @ 5' 7" since March. My emotions recovered, but the weight stayed off I know I could attract her back, but I am not so sure I would take her back. The relationship was unhealthy in more ways than just one.

[ezra]

Day 3

 

I broke down and sobbed hard today, as I´ve never sobbed in my life. 3 days of absolutely no contact with him. My mind is still in negation, I keep thinking that at the end of NC we will reconnect again and have an amazing relationship. But I know I cant cling to that hope. I just wish NC will take these useless thoughts out of my head. Today I concentrated better I must say... I noticed I may be depressed. I´m always out of focus, some friends even make fun of me at college because im not paying attention... I finally feel how a person with roller coaster emotions feels like. I try my best to get better, I SWEAR I DO, but its very hard. 3 days and I know that it doesnt matter how much i miss him i just simply cant break what i myself proposed, no contact. I don´t want to look like im clinically insane, at this point i´ve lost so much of the respect of my friends and family, and specially from him. God I know he was a d((( but I miss him badly.... I was reading a letter that he wrote me. A puzzle that he made for me. I hate him and I love him. I want him back but I dont want him back.

[janut1]

Day 43

 

I lost track and had to actually count. I was so angry yesterday, it all just came flooding up and out. UGGH! I was swearing all day long and everything was so frustrating. I'm mad at HIM for leaving me so cowardly, actually for making me break up with him because I just could not take his hot/cold emotions any longer. There was no closure and nothing really said about why, it just happened. SO ODD.

 

Today is better, but I was NOT happy yesterday. I am on a mission to feel better about myself, getting healthy and trying to feel better about ME. I am turned off by dating and men, so its a great time to focus on myself and maybe some day I will be in a healthy relationship if I ever decide its worth a try.

[floridasfinest]

DAY 1!

 

Very glad I broke NC today...I needed the closure. Although it was hard to hear those words come out of her mouth, it was just what I needed so I do not carry the weight of the decision, and can now properly heal.

 

I am at a very very rough time in my life right now. It seems I have failed at everything I have tried at in the past 3 years...maybe this closure can be a turning point and a wake up call.

 

Congrats to those who have gotten over an ex. I would have never imagined it would be this hard.

[ZenZenny]

Day 29

 

Tomorrow I'm going to reach the 30 day mark of no communication and it's interesting how this whole process happened. I'm probably going to reach out to my ex at the end of the 30 days and check on her in a friendly way and just see how she's been. And then leave it alone. I'm in a much stronger place mentally than I was before I started this challenge and it's funny because I didn't think much would change in 30 days but it did.

 

When I first started I couldn't stand to see her name or even think about her. I couldn't stop wanting to look at her stuff. I couldn't stop wanting to know what she was doing who she was doing it with or why. Now 30 days later I look at life, her, relationships and my emotions a lot differently. I am not as obsessed with her for one. I'm not as over bearing in a emotional since any more. Kind of like, if it happens it happens if it doesn't? Life goes on and I'm just fine. If you like me cool. If you don't that's cool too. I won't be affected negatively. Interesting feeling. About to get off work, smoke a black, hoop and reach out to my good ol ex. I think it's something we both need.

[the dude91]

Day8

 

I kept forgetting to post on here, oh well. Anyways life keeps getting better and better. I'm getting the new Ducati 899 motorcycle AND I'm going to be a homeowner in September. But it's all a bittersweet because I had been working on getting this house as a surprise for my ex so now I'll be sitting in this house by myself for the time being. Still it's pretty exciting to be a homeowner and I can't wait to find someone worthy of my time that I can share these things with. But life keeps going on and it looks like her rebound relationship isn't really a rebound after all so I'm wishing the best for her while I'm waiting for someone better.

 

Make sure you're getting that protein !!!

 

I am man! I found some new protein shakes that seem pretty good, 40g per bottle so I've been downing those after every workout.

[the dude91]

Day 9

 

Still feeling the same as yesterday, excitement about my new bike I'm getting and my house I'm getting but a little down since I really have nobody intimate to share them with. But I'm still moving on, still wish I could do it as fast as she did.

[t1lersm0m1]

Wow, I had to go back and find my post a week ago to remember what day I'm at. Day 49, 7 weeks since we called it quits for good. We broke up mostly because of my Mom's prejudice, but it turns out we also had problems as individuals. We were trying to be "friends" and see where it goes - his words. Being friends was hurting too much. So we called it quits for good.

 

I'm taking the time to be single and finally finally work on myself and my issues, so when the next man comes into my life, I'll be in a better place emotionally.

[Knightz]

DAY 1

 

Last contact with my ex was more than 12 hours ago and I am hoping I will have the strength to never speak to her again. If she were to call me right now, i'm sure I would answer because I do not have the strength to ignore it right now. I still have that bit of hope that we will get back together some day but I know that having hope for that is not the best thing to have. I have to hope for a better future. Hope that someone better than her will come into my life. Hope that I can make it to 30 days without any kind of contact with her whatsoever.

[the dude91]

Day 10

 

Kinda a rough day, looks like the new bike isn't going to happen because the dealer was getting greedy. But oh well I suppose, for the moment I'm still getting a house. But I'm pretty exhausted, I haven't been able to sleep much lately either. Hopefully I'll start sleeping good again soon.

[2 months away]

Day 30

 

Today's my birthday. I hope you'd send me a birthday wish, one I'd ultimately ignore, but one that would let me know you remembered, that you thought of me today.

 

I guess I was hurt that you didn't bother. I was surprised that our mutual friends didn't bother ( I had no idea that "picking sides" existed- what's that all about)

 

I've finally come to terms with it all. We are done. You don't care for me, there is no future

[Kuala]

Day 16

 

! See her & the new guy for the 1st time on FB. Somehow manage to control myself & dont feel anything after seeing it. Maybe reality will kick me sooner. We can do it guys!

[obSCEne]

Day 10 since we last spoke, day 19 since you told me you feel nothing for me anymore and are with another man now. When you walked out the door that night, you insisted we would remain friends and we would talk, like the best friends we always were even before getting together. Looking back on those words, I believe you said that only to make yourself feel better about what has happened. I believe you thought it would comfort me, and that made you feel good even though you had no intention of keeping your word.

 

When we spoke 10 days ago it was you who reached out to me. I kept myself in check, kept the conversation light and friendly. When you asked why you couldn't see things on my Facebook page anymore, I told you the truth. I don't want to see posts/pictures about you and your new boyfriend, not at this point in time. It was best for me to avoid that extra pain, a tactic you've always been willing to use for yourself no matter the cost. I told you I would open that doorway again when I felt ready and moved on from my feelings for you. I guess you took offense to what I did, as you stopped answering and I haven't heard from you since. 10 long days ago, days of confusion, reflection and finding some inner peace.

 

I've finally looked myself in the mirror and have faced my own demons, doing battle with myself every day. Slowly moving from the person I had become, to the person I know I want to be. I fully accept my responsibility for allowing my character to fall so far down, and accept my responsibility in the demise of our relationship. While I confront myself though, you turn to your own tactics of running away from what you feel is bad/negative. You no longer try to see the light in the darkness, you just refuse to deal with the darkness. Instead of facing your own feelings about all this, you turn to a man you barely know, to the alcohol you consume so much of "for fun", to putting distance between myself and the mutual friends of ours that still talk to and see me.

 

It's been 10 days, and I have no doubt there will be 10 more days, and 10 more, etc until I no longer know the count. I hold no ill will towards you, I am merely saddened by the path you've chosen. You were always a better person than that, but maybe I took that away from you. I may never know. All I can say is I wish you the best and I hope you find the strength to confront your own demons one day.

[Just maybe]

Hi all

I got to day 30 days nc.... Went out and had a few drinks then did the dreaded drunk call to her ... God I feel stupid

We broke up in May, since then I did keep light contact and we Evan slept together! Then I get told by her this was a mistake and she doesn't think of me and to leave her alone. How can she be so cruel? I would never do that to anyone. She used me and I feel stupid and hurt

So I'm back on day 2

Good luck everyone

[ezra]

Day 2 of NC... feeling so stupid, Im starting to think this is ruining my mental peace. I would feel so stupid contacting him, Im so sick of myself saying that Im going to do something and not being strong enough to hold on. Been writing letters for him (which makes me feel even more pathetic) I wont send them anyway. He is enjoying his new life and Im here struggling

BTW, Ive myself rejected someone these days. The guy is heart broken, but we werent even friends. The fact that he was so needy and desperate towards me reinforces the feeling that I should not contact my ex, I would look in the same exact way as this needy guy looks. I have to be strong!

[AlejCruz]

Day 8 , I still feel the urge to check her whatsapp or facebook page. I am really trying to control myself but im losing it