LAYAAN Posted May 29, 2017 Share Posted May 29, 2017 Annie, love the videos. So true! Link to comment
annie24 Posted May 30, 2017 Author Share Posted May 30, 2017 Upcoming date with new guy soon. I'll call him Albert. 31, and from my home state, he moved here about 6 months ago. We're trying to pick a day/time now. I never wrote back to Tom. Link to comment
annie24 Posted June 3, 2017 Author Share Posted June 3, 2017 And....... Albert just stood me up. He asked me out for coffee, we settled on today at a place near me. I texted him I got there and where I was sitting. After 15 minutes, I check Tinder and see that he unmatched me. So then I texted that if he didn't want to meet anymore, he should have just told me that and not wasted my time. He's the one who asked me out and set the place, etc... what the heck. ugh!!! Link to comment
annie24 Posted June 3, 2017 Author Share Posted June 3, 2017 It's so weird. Like he was the one who contacted me and asked me out. And now he unmatched me and no response. The last time a guy stood me up was... gosh, I think 15 years ago. Link to comment
notalady Posted June 4, 2017 Share Posted June 4, 2017 Can't believe people still do that, very cowardly. How hard is it to say, sorry changed my mind about meeting? Link to comment
annie24 Posted June 4, 2017 Author Share Posted June 4, 2017 It's so stupid. Ugh. And then 2 of my acquaintances got married yesterday, another one got engaged, and then I have a guy who can't even be bothered to meet for coffee. Link to comment
annie24 Posted June 5, 2017 Author Share Posted June 5, 2017 I have a date with a new guy lined up for later this week. I'll call him Derrick. Seems nice. I can't tell how tall he is though. Hopefully as tall as me? He seems very nice, music teacher. Link to comment
Batya33 Posted June 5, 2017 Share Posted June 5, 2017 Great! I always take to artists, especially musicians/musically inclined! Glad you're moving on to bigger and better.... Link to comment
annie24 Posted June 9, 2017 Author Share Posted June 9, 2017 Well, I had the date. Going home now. He was nice, pleasant, but I think there was zero chemistry there. Neither of us said anything about getting toge Her again. Link to comment
LAYAAN Posted June 9, 2017 Share Posted June 9, 2017 It's so weird. Like he was the one who contacted me and asked me out. And now he unmatched me and no response. The last time a guy stood me up was... gosh, I think 15 years ago. Why do people do this? So immature! How long does it take for these tech-savvy, all-night-texters to send a 1-liner letting you know even half an hour ahead that he is not going to meet up. As a woman who has been through all this (and maybe more) I know how it feels. I know how long it takes for us to get ready for a date. I would much rather appreciate a guy canceling on me and letting me know that ahead than standing me up. Lack of interest should not trump common human courtesy. This poor behavior is so common because either side has no accountability. It is not like you met through a common friend/private matchmaker (an actual person, not online)/family member that you can actually complain to about this person's behavior. Decent people are so few in number it seems! Ugh! Link to comment
LAYAAN Posted June 9, 2017 Share Posted June 9, 2017 It's so stupid. Ugh. And then 2 of my acquaintances got married yesterday, another one got engaged, and then I have a guy who can't even be bothered to meet for coffee. I know how this feels dear. Hugs! You will find someone. (Not trying to give you a pep talk) There is someone for everyone. You are actively putting in efforts to meet people. Keep going. Something, somewhere will click. Hugs! Don't lose hope. "Never think that God's delays are God's denials. Hold on, hold fast, hold out. Patience is genius." Comte de Buffon Link to comment
annie24 Posted June 11, 2017 Author Share Posted June 11, 2017 I know how this feels dear. Hugs! You will find someone. (Not trying to give you a pep talk) There is someone for everyone. You are actively putting in efforts to meet people. Keep going. Something, somewhere will click. Hugs! Don't lose hope. "Never think that God's delays are God's denials. Hold on, hold fast, hold out. Patience is genius." Comte de Buffon Thanks. To be honest, 90% of my energies these days are to work/finding a new job so I don't really feel bad i don't have a partner as my life is full enough. Plus there is some uncertainty with the job market. The government job - I haven't heard anything from them, one way or another. I applied to a bunch of jobs last week as well. My current job is overall good. I have a ton of data, I just have to spend the time to analyze it and get manuscripts out until I get a new job. Link to comment
Batya33 Posted June 11, 2017 Share Posted June 11, 2017 Annie- thinking of you and rooting for you! Link to comment
annie24 Posted June 11, 2017 Author Share Posted June 11, 2017 Annie- thinking of you and rooting for you! haha, thanks!! Overall, things are ok. Though I've been fighting this cough for a few weeks, which has not been exciting. But yeah, I'm very busy, going out with the folks from the gym, going out with my own friends, job hunting. Money's gotten tight though (my promotion came with a pay decrease, weird story). So, there's extra motivation to move on. Link to comment
annie24 Posted June 28, 2017 Author Share Posted June 28, 2017 No big updates. Just applying for jobs. Never heard back on that government job, one way or another. I've kind of given up hope on that one. In the meantime, I'm applying to a lot of other places, just tweaking the resume and cover letter each time a bit. Work here drives me a little batty some days. Not one person in particular, but I'm having one of those days where I'm getting interrupted every 10-15 minutes with a different question from a different coworker. it makes it hard to stay on task when I'm doing something that requires a lot of focus. No dating news either. Hot gym guy is friendly towards me but hasn't made any overt moves. Link to comment
annie24 Posted July 7, 2017 Author Share Posted July 7, 2017 Question: A guy asked me out (met on Tinder) and he says he is excited about meeting. On Sunday, we initially said Saturday (the 8th) but didn't name a time/place. I contacted him on Wednesday (yesterday) asking to firm up plans and suggested a place to meet. He responded that he may have to work on Saturday after all, he'll know his schedule for the weekend soon. I said no problem, just to let me know as soon as he can as I was invited to a party on Saturday night and would go to that if he can't make it on Saturday. He said no problem. It's Thursday night now, how long do I wait for him to reply (I don't want to needle him twice to set a time/place)? I'd also like to respond to my coworker's party invitation, one way or the other. Link to comment
faraday Posted July 7, 2017 Share Posted July 7, 2017 Question: A guy asked me out (met on Tinder) and he says he is excited about meeting. On Sunday, we initially said Saturday (the 8th) but didn't name a time/place. I contacted him on Wednesday (yesterday) asking to firm up plans and suggested a place to meet. He responded that he may have to work on Saturday after all, he'll know his schedule for the weekend soon. I said no problem, just to let me know as soon as he can as I was invited to a party on Saturday night and would go to that if he can't make it on Saturday. He said no problem. It's Thursday night now, how long do I wait for him to reply (I don't want to needle him twice to set a time/place)? I'd also like to respond to my coworker's party invitation, one way or the other. You've given him enough time...I'd go to the work party. If he ends up giving a plan for Saturday, you should give him other dates you're available and say that you're sorry, you had to respond to the invite so the host could plan her party. Link to comment
notalady Posted July 7, 2017 Share Posted July 7, 2017 When does your coworker need a response by? I would wait till Friday mid day at the latest. I think next time it's best to give a deadline, like "let me know before such and such day and time as I need to firm up my plans before then". That's what I do when my friends tell me they'll confirm at a later day/time to avoid miscommunication. Link to comment
annie24 Posted July 7, 2017 Author Share Posted July 7, 2017 She didn't specify when she needs a response by, but I think one day would be polite. Plus it is a house warming party, so I'd like time to buy her a plant or something. Link to comment
faraday Posted July 7, 2017 Share Posted July 7, 2017 When does your coworker need a response by? I would wait till Friday mid day at the latest. I think next time it's best to give a deadline, like "let me know before such and such day and time as I need to firm up my plans before then". That's what I do when my friends tell me they'll confirm at a later day/time to avoid miscommunication. She already did text him once to get him to firm up plans...I think texting him again is....like babysitting. Who wants to remind a guy to go out with them repeatedly? Too much work. Link to comment
annie24 Posted July 7, 2017 Author Share Posted July 7, 2017 I think notalady meant that I should have said something like "let me know by Thursday night if you can make Saturday" or whatever. Instead of leaving it open ended (I just told him to let me know as soon as he knew his weekend work schedule.) Link to comment
faraday Posted July 7, 2017 Share Posted July 7, 2017 I think notalady meant that I should have said something like "let me know by Thursday night if you can make Saturday" or whatever. Instead of leaving it open ended (I just told him to let me know as soon as he knew his weekend work schedule.) That would make more sense Next time. Link to comment
notalady Posted July 7, 2017 Share Posted July 7, 2017 I think notalady meant that I should have said something like "let me know by Thursday night if you can make Saturday" or whatever. Instead of leaving it open ended (I just told him to let me know as soon as he knew his weekend work schedule.) Yes that's what I mean Link to comment
annie24 Posted July 7, 2017 Author Share Posted July 7, 2017 Well, if I wake up and there's no text from him, I'll RSVP yes to my coworker. She should know in advance to get a headcount for food and booze. She's super sweet and nice to me and I've never met this guy before and he's displaying flakey signs, so I think her party is the better option at this point. I got the official rejection from the job I applied to in Europe and some other ones. I think I need to rework my CV and cover letter and make some updates to make me a more compelling candidate. I feel bad for Carol - she's been hanging out (dating?) this guy for a few months. They saw each other last year and then he broke it off because he wasn't having romantic feelings towards her - just as a friend. They reconnected a few months ago and have spent increasing amounts of time together (some kissing and cuddling, but not more than that) and she even met his child (he divorced his ex a few years ago) and she really really liked his kid. He and his ex share custody. She told me she was super excited about their upcoming date (they were going to a show then he was going to sleep over at her place for the first time) but then he cancelled the day before saying the ex was going to drop off the kid with him in the morning, not the evening, as he thought she would. So he was going to cancel the sleep over. I had a red flag feeling there - if he liked her, he would have spent the night but just woken up early and had a big cup of coffee before heading home. He finally told her this week that he just wasn't feeling romantic towards her but thinks she is a great person and hopes she finds someone who feels really excited about her. So she was pretty heart broken. In hindsight, I think she sees he wasn't giving strong "romantic" signals to her, but she was hoping the friendship would turn into more over time, especially with the kisses and cuddles. oh well..... Link to comment
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